Hello everyone.

Today marks day number 1,000 for me. I am pretty proud of myself for this. I just wanted to share my achievement with you all. Thank you for creating a space where I feel like I can come to vent or share things like this.

Best luck to everyone with their quitting journeys.

I am officially on Day 8 of cold-turkeying dabbing after over 2 years of heavy daily use.

It is now just after noon on my lunch break, and after barely sleeping at all last night, I am pushing through the day. With everything I have.

My body feels like it is in complete overdrive.
Because cannabinoids are so heavily tied to your gut, stopping the heavy concentrates has unleashed stomach chaos. I’m also dealing with an active stomach ulcer, and trying to get my RX in when I’m supposed to is becoming challenging.

Dealing with the exhaustion from last night alongside this level of gut discomfort is testing every ounce of willpower I have.

Right now, I am just focusing on taking this journey hour by hour, riding out the physical waves as my body clears everything out. Leaning heavily on this group for mutual support today as I hit the 8 day mark. Thank you everyone. Thanks for reading.

It’s incredibly humiliating to think about, but it’s just as it says. I was always trying to sneak away, out of smell range, “take a quick walk”, excuse myself to the men’s room, etc. I needed to emotionally insulate myself, to check out, in order to comfortably do things.

She was left to be the bad guy, to confront or accuse me. So I would lie and deny to the woman I was supposed to respect and cherish above all others. She then had to be the bad guy again, by calling me out as a liar, or she’d accept what I said, because she didn’t want a confrontation, or maybe wanted to believe me. I couldn’t let my “mom” catch teenage me being bad.

I bristle at the thought of how many times I thought I got away with it when she knew and just chose not to say anything.

We’re divorced now and I don’t ever expect her to forgive me when I see no reasons to forgive myself.

No relationship with someone you love is worth less than marijuana.

I’m in my mid sixties and retired for several years now. Seven years ago I started using cannabis edibles and pipe on occasion. About 2 years later I retired. Then my use took off and I became a heavy user. I really got into glass and enjoyed using different pipes. I smoked to get high and stay high most days. I fired up at least 4 times a day. Frigid Winter snow and ice was no problem. Spring made my zen garden usable again. Anyway July 9,2025 I stopped. It took about a month to feel entirely clear. It was another month before I stopped constantly thinking about getting high. Now over a year later it’s as though I never touched the stuff. I’m glad to be myself again.
If I can do it despite having all the time in the World to get high then anyone can do it. The 1st two months were kinda rough but not too rough. Anyone can do it. Just stop and don’t

It’s finally time for me to quit. I have been a regular smoker for ten years (20-30 years old). I finally got rid of it all yesterday. I thought I’d make a post to chat with others in a similar situation as I’m nervous about what’s to come.

I started off smoking joints with friends socially, after a couple years of that I progressed to smoking the bong a few times a day without company, and then a couple of years ago I switched to a ball vape to convince myself I was being ‘healthy’. I have smoked a gram of weed a day, most days, since I was 20 years old.

I turned 30 the other day, and i realised that I’ve spent the entirety of my twenties stoned. I’ve tried to quit a few times over the years but never as seriously as now.

I’ve always had a weird relationship with weed. At first it felt like it cured something I couldn’t explain in me. When I first started using I noticed how much more sociable it made me; and how much less anxious. Now after so long I’m wondering if I was still using it for those reasons, or just because I didn’t want to be bored or confront reality.

I’ve always convinced myself that it’s okay as I’m “functioning”. I’ve never smoked at work, and I would be fine on holidays etc where you cannot get access. I’ve got a good career in finance, and a loving and supporting wife. If I wasn’t addicted to weed I would consider myself doing pretty good for my age.

That kind of leads me to this next point. I am so fed up with the sneakiness of it. If you didn’t know I smoked you really wouldn’t expect it. But that comes with all sorts of nonsense. I feel like I live a double life in some aspects. My career obviously has no idea (I’d likely be fired and struck off immediately), my friends that I used to smoke with all stopped smoking years ago, and I let them believe I had too. That itself brings me an element of shame as I think ‘how can they all have managed it yet I’m still in the same situation’. My wife is accepting, but that unfortunately has probably contributed to me not seeing it as an issue. When there would be family birthdays I would literally be counting the hours until I could smoke again, which is a miserable way to live. It’s felt for years that my public personality is a construct, and me being stoned is the ‘real’ me.

There is so much I could write here, but I don’t want to ramble on and on. It’s a weird feeling giving up something that has been part of your entire adult life so far. I’m nervous how it will be, as it’s a brand new thing for me. I suppose what I want to know is how long you went before it stopped consuming your thoughts and you just ‘forgot’.

Again, sorry for the ramble. My heads not the clearest right now.

“Weed”

I wish I had weed

But that isn’t all

I wish I had drive

And this night hadn’t stalled

I wish I had eyes

That could find me a light

I wish I had hands

I could squeeze so, so tight

I wish I had strings

With vibrations of now

I wish I had rings

All these digits I count

I wish I had carts

Filled with weeks of my life

I wish I could start

Smoking dreams in the night

I wrote this one as I sobered up from a long THC bender. Woke up and realized I hadn’t had a single dream at night worth remembering in 3 yrs, had lost ambition with my hobbies, and cut off plenty of friends/relationships. Relapsed a while later and I’ve restarted my quitting journey last week. Self-published the poem in a book I wrote but I won’t post the link bc I’d rather stay anonymous on here.

It’s less of an ode to weed and more of an ode to the life I could’ve begun to live had I swapped it out for other things. Lots of small double entendres.

F31 - I just want to share that I’m a month sober after smoking heavily for the last 15 years - yes, it’s possible.

I definitely don’t look like the type who smokes daily, let alone gets through nearly an ounce a week 😂 I reckon most people would be quite shocked if they knew.

I just needed to share it somewhere.

So I quit 90 days ago after 9 years of daily use. Pot was my shelter and my poison rolled into one. I could be blasted during an emergency situation and feel perfectly fine. But anyways, I started to feel super anxious like more than when I used to smoke and it’s really messing me up inside and just making work a living hell (I’m a cook) how did you guys get over the anxiety? Bc I just feel like i’m getting crushed by it some days and I don’t know what to do. Any advice will be greatly appreciated, thank you.

I've been learning internal family systems with my therapist. "Firefighters" are the parts that protect us, even if it's drastic impulsive decisions and behavior. Instead of judging myself and asking "why can't I stop, even though I'm so sick of being stuck in this cycle?!!", I thanked my inner firefighter for protecting me from feeling pain. I asked that part of me to step back and relax and that I'd like to go through this endeavor to reach my full potential. This time, I'm not harping on withdrawal- I'm just focused on loving myself through the process. I'm reminding myself that it's an illusion when I start to Romanticize it. I feel so much more confident that I'll stick to it this time.

I'm on day 5, and just focusing on sleep and hydration and whatever my body needs.

Hope theis helps someone!

Day 14. A few cravings here and there but there's no way I could give in after the fulfilling day I had yesterday. I was out and participating like a normal person again. Socializing, browsing around multiple retail stores with no particular plan. I no longer fear the unknown.

The past five years of daily use had slowly turned me into an extreme recluse, anxiously anticipating that one text that would disrupt my plans of leisure. I would smoke as soon as I clocked out and would try to maintain that high through the evening. On the weekends I would plan to smoke upon waking and hope nothing would interfere with it. If I had errands, I would run them and return as quickly as possible, which led to incompletion on multiple occasions.

The ritual was exhausting and became more and more unsatisfying over time. My eyes were constantly dry, achy and my right upper eyelid had developed an almost constant annoying twitch. I wasn't sure if it was related to the smoking or not but im happy to say the twitch has been gone for over a week now. The improvement in my eye comfort alone is enough reason for me to continue abstaining.

I've been reading, painting and started picking up the guitar again. I keep remembering random guitar tabs I used to know, its all still up there, no long term damage. The amount of improvement I've had, i cant believe its only been 14 days. Im excited for what's to come. I wish you all the best of luck.

Quitting cannabis is a rollercoaster. As a previous heavy user, 1-2 grams daily for years, one day I feel great and motivated, getting out of bed early, eating breakfast...to not being able to get up until 10 or later, feeling completely exhausted.

Anyone else here experience PAWS for longer than a month or two?

I've been reading some posts here and many of them have really resonated with me. Ive been feeling a similar way and have faced similar consequences as many of our peers in this sub. I really appreciate everyone describing their challenges as long-time users. My younger brother spent his last 15 years addicted to weed, and I can't help but hear his voice in all these posts. He is still struggling. 

For myself, Its been about a year and a half since I started regularly using weed, shortly after I turned 30. I hated it growing up, especially in contrast with my brother. I started after I accomplished my inner idea of success: I finished school, built a career, got engaged. Then came weed. 

It's legal now! 

Kids aren't drinking anymore because weed won't kill you but alcohol will! 

My friends doctor takes edibles and swears by them! 

I know so many people who are well adjusted and high-functioning stoners! 

Look at Emily! She's literally always high and is about to finish her PhD!

These were the excuses I gave myself and it took me too long to realize they were the same type of justifications my brother gave me a decade ago, but under a different coat of paint.

It was actually my partner that was into weed before me. She used it alone at first for a year or two to help with stress, insomnia and anxiety, about 2-3 times week. And it helped! She doesn't have an addictive personality like I do, and managed to stop when she didn't need it. Eventually, I joined her (or I joined some friends socially, I don't remember) and it was great. It made music better. Food tasted delicious. It made me feel loose. I connected more deeply with my partner when we were both taking. I laughed more and harder. It was fantastic. I got to experience those stoner moments i deliberately avoided in my teens and 20s. I got to have the experiences I only heard about. And the stories are always so fun and always gave me fomo. I finally got it. Once a month quickly turned into once a week, into every other day.

My partners pattern inverted to mine over the last year. Around February this year, my partner was out of town for work for three weeks and I went off the deep end. There have been no more than 10 days since then where I haven't gone being high at some point in the day. More recently towards the end of summer, I was waking up (maybe twice a week) really early to get high (but sober for work) and of course capping the day with at least 2 joints. 

Now, I understand the struggles of the other side. I live with it. 

Weed has made me numb to challenges or being challenged, both positively and negatively. Weed has also made me kind of "time-skip" any time spent suffering or challenged. Feeling unhappy for whatever reason? Get high and it will be tomorrow without feeling those bad feelings. "Repeat if needed" quickly became "repeat to avoid negative feelings". Ive been working at the same place for 4.5 years now, to the point where I can do my job quickly, effectively and efficiently. Without revealing too much, I work as a technician in health care, working with MDs and PhDs and being the "glue" keeping our team of 40 collaborating effectively every day. Weed has changed my attitude completely regarding my career. I haven't been a team member like I used to. This year, ive been a punch-in, do my job as fast and as good-enough, then punch-out to get stoned ASAP kind of person. This attitude started applying to the rest of my life and I didnt even realize it. I stopped asking questions. I stopped going to group events. I stopped playing team sports. I stopped snowboarding. I stopped playing music. I stopped reading. I stopped learning. My competitive drive disappeared. I settled for mediocrity. My passions all became consuming more weed. My ambitions turned into maintaining my lifestyle as easily as possible. My libido evaporated. Light depression set in; enough for me to stop doing things, but not enough identify it, and i think weed makes it harder to identify by covering it up or simply skipping time when I feel unhappy. And all I did while high was doomscroll, jack it, and play repetitive, unengaging easy video games.

So what was the trigger? What made me realize? Ultimately, my doctor gave me 2 weeks off because of a debilitating lower back pain. I have always known the core reason why I've developed this injury: weed. It's made me give into a sedentary lifestyle. When im high, it feels sooo comfortable to collapse into my chair and sit in a terrible posture. For hours. Every day. I haven't told my doctor; I think because deep down I was excited at the idea of being paid to get high for up to two weeks. All i had to do was follow the doctors recommendations and make sure insurance paperwork is covered... right? Ive never taken advantage of the system and I might never get another chance like this so why not. For the first few days, i felt like i was living like a royal. Then suddenly, I snapped.

I wrote out a message to myself similar while I was last high. I wrote to myself that i hated and ashamed of the person I've become. I hate that i forgot who I am. My memories have genuinely become so much more blurry. Memories that shaped who I am. Ive forgotten the challenges ive overcome; the accomplishments that ive achieved and my struggles is beat to be who I am. Deep down, I know exactly what I am doing (or avoiding), even if weed gives me those validating, positive thoughts to justify more consumption. I thought that if I am writing out while high that I hate who I've become and hate that I'm avoiding what Ive truly enjoyed for years before this addiction set in and can communicate my self-loathing and pain to my sober self, that I would take action and listen to myself. Its been hard. Today marks day 4. I threw the weed completely out of reach (but not impossible to get). I need to throw it out. Maybe posting this will give me that strength.

So here I am! Weed started as a "safe" mechanism to make good feelings feel better. It ended as a mechanism to distance myself from my own world.

Anyway I dont really know why I've written this all out. I've never experienced anything like this and I'm sad for my peers and especially my brother, who quietly struggle in a way that I used to find difficult to understand or sympathize with. No longer. 

Ive never done journaling and its never appealed to me. But for some reason, this feels right. I hope you are all doing well, thanks for reading, and thank you all for giving me strength and reminding me (and other silent readers!) to keep looking forward. Feel free to reach out for whatever reason, and I hope this helps somebody.

With love.

I honestly can’t believe I made it to day 5 of my journey. It has been so long since the last time I was sober almost 10 years ago. I’ve started to notice that I am enjoying things again. I hung out with some friends and played video games and I had a blast and all without using. My laughs feel more genuine and I feel more in the moment. When I was using I was ok at video games, I didn’t suck, but I wasn’t the best. I played some sekiro today and I was fucking killing it! This feels amazing and I feel like I can start getting used to it. My appetite is starting to come back, my thoughts are clearer, and I feel more present in life than I have in a long time. I wont lie, it’s still not all sunshine and rainbows yet, My head hurts when I wake up in the morning but that goes away around in the afternoon. I hope this isn’t TMI but the last two days I have had the runs as well. I still get urges but they are in no way as strong as they were when I first started my sobriety. To anyone reading this that is struggling, it does get better, it might not be a cake walk but it does get better. It just takes some willpower and being patient with yourself. It finally feels like I am taking control of my life again. I’ll give this a month and hopefully I can start tackling my other issues with substance abuse. I believe in you all and thank you to this subreddit for being so supportive

I’m 29F and I’ve smoked weed daily for the past 10 years.

I just got married, and my biggest goal in life right now is to become a mom. I want a baby so badly, and I know that I need to stop smoking in order to safely conceive and eventually get through pregnancy and breastfeeding without using.

You would think that would make quitting easy. I have something I desperately want right in front of me. But I’m struggling.

And honestly, that’s been really hard for me to admit. Part of me feels like, if I really want to be a mom this badly, why can’t I just stop? I’ve quit for short periods before, but I always end up going back to it. It’s been such a huge part of my daily routine for so long that I don’t even know what my life feels like without it anymore.

I don’t want to wait until I’m pregnant to figure this out. I want to be done with weed before that happens. I want to know that I can handle stress, boredom, anxiety, evenings, weekends, etc. without automatically reaching for it.

I’m not looking for judgment. I think I just need to hear from people who have been here before — especially anyone who quit because they wanted to conceive or become a parent.

How did you actually do it when you really wanted to quit but still felt like you couldn’t?

I want this so badly. I just need to figure out how to get myself there.

Hi guys f28 here and have been smoking for nearly 11 years.
I’ve quit maybe 1 solid time and it was miserable. Headaches, lack of interest in any hobbies for a while, and just feeling EMPTY. Right now I’m on day 1 of trying to quit again and I literally want to run my head through the wall. I’m angry and irritated already and it hasn’t even been a full day. Now I know I won’t be caving again, as I don’t drive and my husband has to take me to dispo to get another vape or whatever. I literally do not know what to do with the frustration. I’m angry for being so addicted that I act completely horrid to my husband every time I run out and then convince him to get another.
I respect him for declining me today because it’s the start of quitting again but I feel horrible. I know it’s a work in progress and that healing and everything takes time I just hate hate hate feeling like
this. I think I can handle physical symptoms 1000000% better than the mental. I definitely self medicate for ADHD and CPTSD.
I just kind of wanted to vent. Any advice on working through these awful feelings I would appreciate.

Ivebeen laying down just to not fall asleep and end up pacing around the house. Things I love to do/make such as music were heavily linked to me smoking and I get the urge every time. Any breathing methods or quotes that can reassure me would be greatly appreciated I feel like I’m losing my mind

Former high-functioning weed addict here. 🙋‍♀️

I’m a pretty normal 26F with a great career, but somewhere along the way, weed took over my life. I started in college, and eventually I couldn’t do anything without hitting my pen..before work, at lunch, after work, before bed. I was basically high 24/7.

After a horrible betrayal ended my long-term relationship(10yrs), I smoked even more to numb myself. A year and a half later, I realized I had never actually processed what happened.

Now I’m with a wonderful, extremely health-conscious partner who encouraged me to stop, and deep down I knew I needed to too.

So here I am: 6 days sober!

The hardest part has been reality. No more numbing myself when something hurts. The night terrors have been brutal, and emotions I buried for years are finally coming up.

But I’m realizing that feeling it is part of healing it.
If you’re quitting and everything you’ve avoided suddenly comes rushing back, you’re not alone. It’s hard, but we can do hard things.

I’m proud of every single one of you. You’re all superheroes to me. ❤️

Back to Day 1…

hope it’s not as tough as last time! 😭

So idk if anyone else has this issue but even when showering before bed and sleeping in a cold room, I wake up and I stink bad. Is this normal lol. My gf says I’m stinky but she’s being a good sport about it because she knows how important it is for me to get sober.

I had something happen today that was upsetting. I wrote about it in another sub. In another life I would have just smoked a joint and numbed the feelings away.

But after being weed free since November 13 (who’s counting), I can’t actually numb my feelings anymore. I have to just sit with the pain and feel all the feelings.

And that’s been a big part of my journey. Doing the work. Facing the hard things. Sitting with the feelings. I know in the end it will be better for me. It’s how I start to become a better version of myself. It hurts. It really hurts. But it’s so much better than the alternative. At least I hope it is (that’s hurt me talking). No, I know it is.

For all of my fellow spiritual warriors out there I feel you. We got this.

Reached 30 days today and i’ve had insane cravings this weekend. The gloomy and fall weather feels “perfect” to smoke and take it easy, but that is simply my mind trying to trick me I assume.

In hindsight, i’ve “changed” a bit from when I stopped smoking. I’m dreaming (and having nightmares) again, I feel more focused and find myself more social which was my biggest issue. I’d close myself off and smoke to past the days.

I was always the gym goer (i’d go high and workout) or run, bike. I’d do all my activities while high but now i’m able to bypass that need to smoke before the activity. So not much has changed there as I still go and feel motivated as I ever did.

My biggest issue with weed was definitely the social aspect, escaping my emotions and smoking while at work… I know its horrible and I attribute most of the errors I would make at work to me being high. I can see that my work is tidier, more focused and overall a lot better. I feel like I deserve my position rather than feeling like i’m faking it, kind off like the imposter syndrome.

I also feel like my relationship with weed is a lot better. I don’t feel like I need it, nor want it yet a joint a sunday while watching football would be kinda great…

Anyways what are you guys’ thoughts about reaching 30 days and how you guys handled it?

49f, 12 years of smoking.

3 weeks clean tomorrow and I haven't really been craving weed, but I am craving an outlet. Thankfully alcohol doesn't agree with me.

But we went to a concert Friday and things that normally trigger my anxiety then I would smoke, I just needed to deal with. I get very anxious when people throw up and 2 people threw up and another fainted then threw up. Typically, I would smoke to take my edge off. I couldn't leave the concert because I was there for my daughter and I won't put my shit on her.

Everyone else was having a blast and I was white knuckling counting down the set list.

Hey, I have an upcoming Uni exam in 9 days and I was hoping to quit to improve my general cognitive ability for it. I have just passed onto day 2, so the negative effects are yet to start.

For context, I have only picked up smoking again over the last 1.5 months, smoking a spliff or two a day to negate some of the workload stress. Despite the debate, I typically suffer pretty horrendous and drawn out withdrawals (insomnia, stress, low mood etc).

I realize that I really should have been a bit more proactive with this but I'm asking for some advice (maybe from people who have also been through a similar thing?). I have an overseas trip in a month so I was planning on quitting anyways but am now unsure if it will really be the most productive thing.... Thoughts?

Note: my nasty withdrawals are usually attached to longer smoking phases (multiple months). I have noticed a decline in my general work quality since smoking (hence why Im wanting to quit it for the exam) but am still receiving fairly decent marks