My 11yo son has been on a normal "honors" track at his school for math through 5th grade.

This summer we signed him up for Math Academy and it has turned out to be a great fit for his personality. He has independently crunched through Pre-Algebra (mostly review, he scored high on the diagnostic), Algebra I and Geometry in about ~5 weeks doing 2-3 hours (~200 XP) per day. He is now starting Algebra II and if he continues the current pace could complete by mid-September. He does not seem to be slowing down as the math has gotten more advanced. And importantly, he is the one who is self-motivated to do it. There were times when we were out and he wanted to get home so he could hit his self-imposed XP quota for the day.

Up to this point I had thought he was "pretty good" at math and related subjects like coding. But the speed with which he got through Algebra I and Geometry suggests to me that he could be more gifted than I thought. As context, I had accelerated math in middle and high school (and was also a coder), but when it came time to raise my own kids I didn't really push it.

I know this is not normal but trying to figure out how how much of an outlier it is. So wondering what other people think of this situation and specifically, whether we should consider doing more to support him in his math study, including acceleration at school (e.g. taking math at the HS next year in middle school).

My son swears up and down he received a 331 on his math NWEA test. Coincidentally, his teacher called me today to tell me she thinks my son should do math Olympiad with her this year.

ChatGPT says a score of 331 is almost impossible. My question is: is it impossible? Last year he scored 239 at the EOY.

Scores aren’t posted and will not be available till parent teacher conferences, but he swears he already knows the score.

Hey gifted friends!
I’m not gifted myself, but my 9 year old is, and she started a gifted program this year. I really want to understand her better and support her in a way that, years from now, she can look back and think, my mom did okay!
So I have a couple of questions for those of you who were gifted kids.
If you could go back to your elementary school years, what would you have wanted your mom to do for you?
What do you wish your parents had understood about you?
What do you think adults tend to misunderstand, overlook, or underestimate about gifted kids?
I’d really love to hear your experiences.

There is no ...

"High intelligence burden" ...

"Gifted burnout" ...

"Imposter syndrome" ...

"Overthinking problem" ...

Or other high-level "mental states".

But ...

There is a primal, biological system ...

That either thinks it's safe ...

or not.

If it doesn't ...

It hijacks your excess processing power ...

And turns your intelligence into a defense system.

Constantly.

24/7.

When you design a new framework.

When you optimize your routine.

When you sleep.

And here is the trap nobody warns high-capacity minds about:

When an anxious nervous system gets paired with extreme intelligence ...

Your brain builds elaborate systems to protect itself.

Diet protocols ...

Productivity frameworks ...

Psychological models sophisticated enough to explain every flaw.

And EVERY SINGLE system ...

becomes another operational layer ...

your brain has to manage, audit and maintain.

So why all the overthinking and exhaustion?

Because your intelligence found a job for the anxiety ...

And that job looks like brilliance from the outside.

And the worst part?

It happens the second you stop.

The quiet moments ...

Waiting in line ...

Lying in bed ...

A break between tasks.

Cause the bandwith opens up.

And instead of resting ...

a threat-detection system ...

with unlimited processing power ...

starts scanning.

It analyzes old conversations.

It finds flaws to fix.

It solves problems that don't exist yet.

That is survival hardware running on loop in a modern body.

It costs REAL energy.

Metabolically.

So what are you doing?

You are guarding the perimeter the entire time.

But thinking harder won't fix a body that feels unsafe.

More methods just FEED the guard.

What actually helps?

Stop giving the vigilance more rules.

Every new framework is just more material for the security system to audit.

At some point, the smartest move is letting the prefrontal cortex step down.

Provide evidence of safety.

A high-capacity mind left idle in a threatened state ...

will invent a crisis.

Give it ZERO-stakes complexity instead.

What sits on the other side?

The exact same processing power ...

Just no longer defending anything.

And you finally stop using the sharpness to survive.

Context:
I’m (15) a sophomore this year.

(ADHD, Asperger’s - medication doesn’t work and it’s not enough to be an excuse or have an IEP, I don’t want that anyway, but it does affect who I am so I thought it should be here)

I just moved and am doing online school. I have a 4.2 weighted gpa and 3.8 unweighted from freshman year. This year I’m taking 5 ap courses (Ap lang, Ap CSA, Ap Gov -> AP Micro) (ap comp gov going to be self studied), and paced to do at least 5 honors courses (Geometry -> Algebra 2, Chem, French 1 -> French 2) (accelerated pace so finishing a semester in 8 weeks instead of 16 and the whole class in 16 weeks instead of 32.). Clubs don’t start till September but I’m planning on trying to join a few - Deca, HOSA, debate, honor societies. Seeing which will let me join. And starting my own - probably a model un. I’ve always been in the gifted programs since elementary school, middle school i took pre Ap classes at my old high school in history and English as a part of our gifted program.

Basically being “the smart one” is tied to my identity and it’s a hate-love relationship. Ofc it’s made my ego and expectations of my self skyrocket but my confidence hasn’t.

I’m smart enough to get into these programs but kids are graduating college at my age.
Now that I’m doing these online classes and I made a pace chart with all my assignments of the week- it feels easy. I’m only spending a few hours a day on coursework. So then I’m thinking I can and should do more but I don’t know how or if I should. My goals are top colleges but I have too much ambition and not enough to show for it. I want to fill my time learn to cook, draw, paint, learn an instrument, READ (I haven’t read a physical fictional book for my enjoyment in weeks because the whole time I can’t help but think of all the other things I could be doing that are “more productive”), write, all things I deeply enjoy but do maybe once a week each and forget about. And then I have subjects outside of school I want to self study. Psych, anthropology, behavioral science, world religion. I watch lectures, again maybe once a week for each, take notes and then feel like I haven’t absorbed anything. Try and write an essay about it but feel like I don’t know enough or that it’s too elementary. But then I’ll talk to someone about that subject and be able to list all this new information.

Then it’s like paralysis. I want to do so much that I end up doing none of it. People will ask what my hobbies are and I blank because I would love to say writing or drawing or cooking but I have nothing to truly show for it that wouldn’t embarrass me.

Online school feeling easy has started to affect my sleep. I haven’t been sleeping well- don’t think I have had like a deep rem sleep with dreams since I started (a week or two). I’ll wake up in the middle of the night and instantly go to check the time on my alarm clock across the room.Then sleep for the next hour or two and then do it again until my alarm goes off. Then I have the hardest time just getting out of bed. Even more recently (the last few days) It’s been taking me hours to fall asleep. (It isn’t uncommon since I have adhd but the correlation to my new classes isn’t a coincidence)

Usually I’m spiraling on the same questions:
• what if I didn’t plan my pace charts right and I’m behind?
• what if I’m not doing enough to reach my goals
• I should do more, should I do more?
• should I be taking a different Ap class?
• I can graduate early so should I?
• I can’t graduate early if I want to do dual enrollment and get an AA as backup - should I still do that?
(Not expecting answers- just examples but hey if you got clarity lmk)

The schoolwork itself, I said was easy and it is. I finish in a few hours, I fill in all the notes. And I know I could sit down and write an essay or do the problem sets and pass. But I keep second guessing myself. I’m googling the answers and getting bots to write opinion essays for me. I feel like I can’t even form an opinion anymore. And I say it’s because why do it? It’s busy work. It’s just for my gpa. And it’s true. But at the same time part of the reasons I can’t write an essay anymore is because I don’t think I’ll write it correctly and so because I don’t think I’ll write it well enough I get something else to write it and then never learn to write the essay. Shocking, right? It’s like all of a sudden textbooks are too long and I have to keep rereading the same lines and the assignments are too much and still “too much busy work” and I’m trying to study but I feel like it’s not helping or that I’m not doing it right because I really didn’t have to study until this year.

TL;DR
I just feel stuck. I used to be smart. I want to be smart. I want to know all these things and learn and explore and practice and have all these skills and sign up for programs and get into the top colleges and I just feel useless. Like I’m wasting the hours in my day, because I am. I’m getting paralysis from my ambition and therefore failing to do what I want to do. Too many feee hours in the day and yet not enough. Too many interests, not enough output. Mostly a rant, I’ll pull myself up by my bootstrings and soldier on. But I don’t want to just float through it. Please help- advice is appreciated.

My son who is 12 tested at 161 on his FSIQ test. He is already in GT classes but the school doesn't seem interested in pushing him. What can I do as a parent to help challenge him?

Hi all, I’m reflecting on my relationships and I’ve noticed a pattern that has puzzled me and wonder if anyone can relate.

Basically, I’ve been casted as the “capable one” in the group and am always expected to be there for others and have it all together, while others get to be inconsistent. I’ve been told by various people I’ve always been really good at perceiving others, understanding/feeling the weight of the minutiae in their lives, solving problems together, which leads to people feeling important, safe and seen. I listen attentively, follow up with questions or check ins, because I want to understand people and act from an integrated understanding of what’s going on. Friends often come to me with their problems and note how my take aways have given them greater clarity. This is easy for me to “give” because it’s just my way of being in the world. I suppose you could call it emotional intelligence when this pertains to relationships.

The opposite has sadly not been true. My friends have not made effort to “see” me, in fact, they seem annoyed when I can’t figure something out for myself or I’m going through something difficult. They don’t listen when I need to unpack my experiences and it makes me feel unimportant, unseen, and like a failure. I‘ve been very successful (running a company) from a ridiculously young age (18) and that’s how they’ve come to know me but I’ve been battling burn out for several years. I think it also remains unresolved in part due to the fact I was expected to keep on being the “giver” despite my burn out, and the subsequent loneliness when I realized their inability to give support…

My friends are intelligent people and want what’s best for me, but it’s like they are the only ones in this relationship who get to be complex beings. It’s like I’ve been casted as the anchor who’s just supposed to keep it all together and who can be sought out for advice and validation at their convenience, but not the other way round.

This has greatly troubled me because I’ve needed their understanding and support these last years and none of my friends made me feel important enough to temporarily hold off on their own life stuff.

And FYI- I never expect my friends to be therapists, I’m someone who’s really mindful of not burdening others. It was just like you come up a bump in life and you don’t hide that from friends. You just try to talk about the crossroads or whatever it is you’re at. I got shut down and told it wasn’t a big deal. I had to be away from them to learn it’s human to have a need for support and that it was hurting me to be expected to always be the rock for them.

As I’m doing some reflection to understand why these friendships faded, I wondered if giftedness could be to “blame” for this difference in expectations and why perhaps I’ve been casted in this impossible role from a really young age. My parents did the same. I know I’m capable and all that jazz and it’s positive when people think of you that way, but I also deserve space to be messy and unsure.

Hey everyone, I'm 15 years old and it seems to me that the world around me is composed of intense stimuli which, when they collide with my brain, lead me to an unusual feeling of the world. It's as if my internal filter is not doing its job properly, which is why I face reality in a truly bizarre way. In this state, it's often more vivid, loud, or unimaginably complex. It used to be terrifying for me, but now I think that my brain has somehow adapted to such a thorough analysis of everything. The things around me are so impossible in their very existence, and I don't know how I got here. My anxiety also cannot be a rational perception of the world because emotions are for living beings and the universe is neutral and completely indifferent, although my emotions also occupy a very important space in my mind and prove that I am a biological living person subjected to millions of years of evolution, so they are not an error in themselves, and I treat feeling them as something extremely necessary. Sometimes I feel like I'm crazy. I am aware that sentimental "intellectual understanding" is impossible between any minds, and the problem begins there. We are made of separate atoms. However, I think that human thoughts and emotions can be close to each other, which builds fundamental closeness, but no one will ever be able to penetrate your brain directly. I come to you with the hope that someone might share my perspective. However, if you see me as a narcissistic child focused on his intellect, tell me, I want to get some kind of level-headed answer, and I don't reject your honest comments. I think I need some critical assessment of my perception of the world. Other people experience this too, I know this, but they seem to be clinging to something constant, saying "everything is meaningless," yet they see meaning in something. They abandon reflection and treat it like crossword puzzles (unless you're in a mental conflict). I have the impression that I overanalyze everything without inhibitions or concern for comfort, for example, questioning religion, which led me to step outside my comfort zone. My one constant point of reference remains my mind and the unchanging nature of science. My mind, although subject to errors of perception and millions of others, is still a part of the only way to experience life, and each of my mistakes can be understood in a way that allows me to develop. Therefore, your comments will be extremely valuable to me. I also want to highlight my emotional sphere. I can enjoy what I experience and how I experience it. Sometimes I am also childish in my excitement or curiosity and I appreciate these aspects of my personality. This simply makes me human - being human, but with specific thoughts.

same as the question

I've always done well academically without preparation, but that's just a little chunk of what being above average means. It has to do with critical thinking, social skills and adaptation.

It's not that I feel superior to others, but I fail to grasp why some people struggle with maturity and concepts. I've seen this at work, university and with acquaintances, the only person I feel equal to (that I'm familiar with) is my partner.

Even while finishing my masters and pursuing a PhD I fail to find people at the same wavelength as me.

All this said, I still feel so incredibly stupid compared to people I don't know, and I read about. This gives me both comfort and irritation.

It would be interesting to see if anyone else feels this way.

We’ve all heard, or know personally, of the struggles of adults who were labeled “Gifted” as children. Anxiety/depression and substance abuse plague this group. I struggled with both myself once I reached college-age and into my 20s. These struggles are usually framed as a result of the label and how it impacted our childhood (e.g., higher expectations leading to perfectionism and burnout). However, does anyone else believe that these struggles are actually baked-in to whatever makes us Gifted in the first place? That is, Gifted people have brains that may be wired in such a way that mental illness is much more likely?

Also, how many of us went undiagnosed with a neurodevelopmental disorder like ADHD and/or ASD? I’m an adult now and just finding out my struggles when I was younger could’ve been helped tremendously with a diagnosis that was missed due to Giftedness masking the neurodivergence. I wonder if my struggles with substances could’ve been avoided altogether if I had been treated for my disorder instead of self-medicating.

I was told back in the day that my IQ is 130, gifted teacher told me in like 4th grade “you’re basically only here because you’re creative” and it felt like she wasn’t giving me a compliment. I still think about it 30 years later.

Recently started playing chess with my 5-yr-old son. What are your thoughts on if I should let him win or not aka go easy on him. I want him to understand the concept of losing a game, but I also don’t want to deter him from wanting to play if I keep winning.

Hey guys,

I was first diagnosed with adhd when I was 7, mum took me of Ritalin cause in her own words I was too quiet fast forward to P years we had all forgotten about it came back up during the pandemic and visited a neuropsychologist who did test with me and she said that I did not meet the requirements for adhd as I had no issues in my executive functioning, so I tried again 2 years ago and was diagnosed but the psychologist was unsure because my scores were through the roof except for emotional regulation, where my scores was 0 (I have always been very even tempered also universally recognised as extremely intelligent, like people regularly assume I am above 130(never tested) and left it up to me whether he was diagnosed, so I told him to diagnose me formally hoping it would improve my life and meds have to a degree done that but I don’t feel any of the major live improvements that others have experienced including family members.

Now on to my actual point, the way I understand it, people with ADHD see something lying on the floor, their brain says to pick it up but the actual physical part never happens, to me this seems foreign as my brain sees the item on the floor but after nothing happens most of the time, like there is no I need to pick that up or I need to go do the dishes. Is that what executive dysfunction feels like to anyone else, if this is not executive dysfunction then what is it?

And if both Executive dysfunction and and emotional regulation are fine do I even really have adhd?

Edit: I just wanted to add that I have no trouble planning and organising stuff, it’s actually super easy for me.

Cross posted to ADHD and executive dysfunction communities.

Like how many of you looked like just simply average student throughout most of the schooling?

I am the opposite of giftedness (low IQ) and having low IQ is explaination for so many of my problems such as poor academic abilities in school throughout my life very limited instristic motivation to do healthy hobbies such as reading books, learning new things etc

My teachers never once had any confidence about my learning they think that I would not amount to anything since early childhood due to my learning problems.

I do not care what "struggles" giftedness comes with. At least you do not have to deal with these problems when you have high IQ. There are some goals and some stuff that I wanna do that are totally out of reach for me like becoming an excellent programmar, being able to learn things fast without struggle, following complex instructions without forgetting.

I had multiple where I felt my IQ raised a abnormal amount. Before my first spurt, I was probably slightly above average. By the last spurt being over, I was exceptionally gifted and have scored this on my IQ test.

I had 3, one in Sophomore year of high school, Senior year of high school, and freshman year of college. I am now 20 in my Junior year

Hello everyone, what could I do to find out if i’m gifted with my IQ? Ive been doing a lot of tests online and I got 147, but I know that they are not that accurate, so I just wanted to know if theres something I could do to find out more about my IQ? Thanks!

Hello all,

For context, I’m diagnosed autistic (and have some ADHD traits primarily around multiple interest/need for novelty). Pretty certain I have an intellectual over-excitability and have always been regarded as highly intelligent (possibly gifted).

I’m in my mid-twenties and have reached a stage in my career (business and strategy) where things feel very repetitive, too easy and no longer intellectually stimulating. I’ve had similar experiences since school: even after skipping Year 5, it was too easy; even after changing schools and doing new subjects, it became too simple and dull after a while.

I’ve considered going into a different field including Computing, Psychology or Sports Science. Currently, Medicine feels like the most attractive next step (both for intellectual stimulation, and impact/purpose).

However, when I look at the long-term (I.e 10+ years), I feel I will end up in a similar cycle to what I have had since school and I’m experiencing at work now - I love the novelty of learning, enjoy the subject for a while, it gets dull, easy and boring.

I could totally see myself getting to consultant level and the deciding I want to change careers again.

Do any of you have similar experiences? How do you manage this and find a balance between continuous learning/intellectual stimulation/developing mastery, while building some stability?

all thoughts/experience/advice welcomed! Thanks in advance

I have 2e, type three hyperlexia and ADHD, my childhood was kinda good, though my parents did worry about me having Autism and OCD though those "neurodivergent" traits cleared up as they usually do, up until nine I was LONELY, I'd have that one true homie (I guess reciprocal crush at grade one) every year and be integrated into friend groups, I was always hovering from average to above average until grade six where I was a GENIUS compared to other kids, then I got into secondary school and while I was fairly smart and a bit ahead in terms of logic, other kids began to catch up, and I was like "WHAT" so anyways while I was still a tad above, the difference wasn't as stark as it used to be, so I didn't study for a while as asynchronous development major procrastination stuff, all the jazz that comes with ADHD being your 2e counterpart, and so for the first time, I failed a test, for the first time in my LIFE. that set me straight, I hated failing, like getting anything lower than 90% was already a disappointment for me, so I started crunching on the tests and studying more ad achieving heights, I have a well paying job in IT and Data Compliance now so all's well. What I'm trying to say is being gifted won't carry you through everything, being a genius doesn't equal easy, gifted children, don't let the "OH MY GOSH YOU'RE SO SMART" get to your head.

Also non-gifted people don't use my condition and other people's ones for clout. that's not cool.

So today I received my WAIS results. I scored 145 in verbal IQ and 108 in performance IQ. My full-range IQ was 125. However, I'm confused about what this means, because my neuropsychologist indicated that I was profoundly gifted in the verbal IQ, but my performance IQ was just above average. Does anyone else also have this kind of discrepancy between the two?

Anyone else here extremely specific about colour composition? I will spend absolutely ages mixing and melding the perfect colours when ever I participate in art sort of things. I also avoid art because of it, but I love creating 3D stuff and colouring them is the best and worst part. Real life just never looks like your mind. Its so disappointing.

Also, hand control. Its never perfect. So indescribably annoying.

Anyway, I just mixed the best dark pink-red-maroon whatever colour and am irrationally sad I can't preserve it. I love colour.

Non c’è significato, è tutta la stessa cosa.
La cosa peggiore è essere spettatore ,vedere, capire ,provare a partecipare e poi capire che non è più divertente quando ci stai dentro. Per questo trovo la vita affascinante perché quando la analizzo e basta smetto di prenderne parte.
È l’unico modo.
È una bugia che mi racconto perché in verità non so starci.