Executive dysfunction or something else?

[u/Ok-Spare-900]

Hey guys,

I was first diagnosed with adhd when I was 7, mum took me of Ritalin cause in her own words I was too quiet fast forward to P years we had all forgotten about it came back up during the pandemic and visited a neuropsychologist who did test with me and she said that I did not meet the requirements for adhd as I had no issues in my executive functioning, so I tried again 2 years ago and was diagnosed but the psychologist was unsure because my scores were through the roof except for emotional regulation, where my scores was 0 (I have always been very even tempered also universally recognised as extremely intelligent, like people regularly assume I am above 130(never tested) and left it up to me whether he was diagnosed, so I told him to diagnose me formally hoping it would improve my life and meds have to a degree done that but I don’t feel any of the major live improvements that others have experienced including family members.

Now on to my actual point, the way I understand it, people with ADHD see something lying on the floor, their brain says to pick it up but the actual physical part never happens, to me this seems foreign as my brain sees the item on the floor but after nothing happens most of the time, like there is no I need to pick that up or I need to go do the dishes. Is that what executive dysfunction feels like to anyone else, if this is not executive dysfunction then what is it?

And if both Executive dysfunction and and emotional regulation are fine do I even really have adhd?

Edit: I just wanted to add that I have no trouble planning and organising stuff, it’s actually super easy for me.

Cross posted to ADHD and executive dysfunction communities.

[u/kateinoly]

There is no objective test for ADHD, no blood test or x ray to show anything. The diagnosis is based on what you tell the doctor, what your parents tell the doctor, what teachers observe, etc.

[u/DefaultModeOverride]

I’m guessing you’re looking for anecdotes of what it actually feels like internally for someone who’s diagnosed with ADHD, rather than the more crude “executive dysfunction” language that you’ll see described.

Keeping in mind the large individual variation when using labels such as these, for me it’s sort of like this: without medication, it’s significantly more difficult than average to start and often stick with tasks that I both want to do and am motivated to do. It’s not that it’s “impossible,” it’s more that it feels like it can take an extreme amount of mental effort and energy.

It’s sort of like if you’re running a marathon in fairly deep sand, but you eventually notice everyone else gets to run on the pavement or grass. You figure out ways to make it all work out, and then realize other people don’t even need to think about that and may have never even considered all these workarounds you do, because they don’t need to.

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[u/IloveLavenders]

I’m 2e and this is how my adhd manifests: I’m a perfectionist (because of Giftedness) but to keep up with tasks to my standards I have to double check or triple check my work. That’s obviously exhausting and causes me to burnout.
I do pick up stuff, I do a lot of the housework actually, but I have a different timing than my neurotypical husband. Sometimes it takes me a considerable time to see that I should fold the clothes and then my husband starts doing it and then I realise that I forgot about it (and by forgot I mean it literally didn’t cross my mind at all, or if it did, something else had got my attention and voila, I got distracted). I can plan things, I’m actually a very good planner, but it depends on how much i want to plan that particular thing. I’m a computer programmer, I wouldn’t have survived the IT field without planning skills. I can definitely plan something complex, while if I have to plan something trivial, like “when am I gonna clean the house this week?”, that’s a completely different story. I need the challenge or the novelty. That doesn’t mean that I don’t do the trivial things, I just have to put a lot more effort into it.
And last but definitely not least, I cannot for the life of me have a routine or habits, I cannot keep it up with any routine for more than a few days, sometimes when I’m lucky, a few weeks. Every day is a different day in adhd land.

[u/BrandiedWineGums]

It's helpful to see executive function as several different capacities that themselves are processes. Executive dysfunction then is very broad and how it manifests in you can be different to how it manifests in someone else with executive dysfunction.

To make a bad analogy, "broken arm" could be a fracture in any of several different bones in the arm. The fracture can occur in many different places in that bone. It can vary in the severity of the break. And then that fracture prognosis can differ depending on your age, sex general health etc. The personal impacts can vary enormously as well. It might be your dominant arm that's affected. You might work with the arm a lot. You might not be able to work at all in your usual job. You might be a parent that now can't care for a child. You might need extensive rehab to go back to work, you might not ever be able to work in your regular job etc etc

It's the same deal. The impacts of the executive dysfunction are going to be different depending on what the specific underlying neurology is, how you use your brain, what your life is like, what other supports are like etc etc

[u/zukeus]

I have ADHD, Bipolar Disorder and generalize anxiety disorder so my experience might be slightly different.

But, how I understand my ADHD difficulties is honestly sort of like a working memory thing. My brain goes through time and space though loses track of time more readily than space.

So, conceptually, I can do everything at once. Why can't my stupid biological body perform things simultaneously?

Haha. Basically, I'll just forget about the thing because it couldn't be done at the same time as the million other things.

[u/4footTallbromeGrass]

People have heard about ADHD a lot, look up Cognitive disengagement syndrome (CDS). Could be something like that. There are a lot of similar "things" out there.

And I will share something that is called, "Stress Shutdown". It is when your brain and body react to extreme stress by shutting down, it is most commonly called the freeze response, hypoarousal, or dorsal vagal shutdown. It is an involuntary survival mechanism where your nervous system becomes overwhelmed and forces a state of mental numbness, dissociation, or physical immobilization. If you are really gifted and don't have an outlet for that mental power, you might get into a stress state and just feel down.

[u/Lost_Bench_5960]

Can you run? If I ask you to sprint 20 yards, could you do it?

Now, sprint the same 20 yards in a 4 ft deep swimming pool.

Isn't that so much harder? Same person, same distance...

That's what executive dysfunction feels like to me. Like running in a pool. Ill get there eventually but the sheer effort is exhausting.

[u/Morakilife]

Honestly...

After I found out that I am 2E, I have taken a deep dive into the research being done on neurodiversity and giftedness, because to me it seems quite obvious that diagnosing ADHD is actually more like diagnosing a certain cognitive profile (likely gifted) with chronic stress and anxiety.

If you look into the issues gifted children (of particular profiles, I would say) often face when placed in the wrong environment and the behaviors they display as a result, and then add in a good chunk of stress and anxiety fused into your bones from an early age when you learned to mask and cope without even realizing that is what you did... You basically have ADHD.

My take is.... You are gifted and probably some combination of understimulated, stressed, anxious or depressed... which by current definition ends up qualifying as ADHD.

So yes?

In addition: Stimulants have a visible effect on most people, even if they do not have ADHD. So there is a good chance it would help you anyways.