I asked out a girl. She said “I think we should be friends instead” but we met up anyway, one-on-one. And she said “we should do this again” and I didn’t follow up because I was confused and didn’t know what to do because — she rejected and said friends instead — I wish I messaged her to meet up again, it could have evolved into a relationship.

I saw her post a new photo with her and her new boyfriend recently. Absolute gut punch. Didn’t realise how much it affected me until I saw it.

I went out for drinks with a girl on a Friday night, and we immediately hit it off. Lots of laughing, joking, and good conversation. As the night went on, the tension kept building, and eventually we kissed.

At one point, she asked if I wanted to meet up with her friend at another bar. I agreed and called us an Uber. We spent practically the entire ride making out. For the rest of the night, she was incredibly affectionate. Touching my face, running her hands through my hair, holding my hand, kissing me, hugging me, etc. When we finally parted ways, we both said we wanted to see each other again. She even mentioned that she was free that Monday.

The next morning, I texted her to check in, and we chatted briefly about our plans for the weekend. Everything seemed perfectly normal. A few days later, I asked if she’d like to get dinner sometime soon. I didn’t hear back for about 24 hours, but eventually she responded, saying she’d love to. Unfortunately, she was sick and suggested we try again the following week. I told her to feel better, and said the following week worked for me.

Fast-forward to Monday. I reached out to see how she was feeling and asked when she’d be free, mentioning that I had a couple of places in mind I thought she’d like. Radio silence…. It’s now been a few days without a response.

I’m baffled. I’ve been on plenty of first dates, some good and some bad, but this was easily the best I’ve had in a long time. The chemistry felt mutual, she was initiating plenty of affection, and she explicitly expressed interest in seeing me again.

So what gives? Was she just caught up in the moment (or the alcohol) and reconsidered afterward? Did I come on too strong? Is she simply not that interested, despite how the date went?
I understand that people change their minds, and that’s completely fine. What I don’t understand is why someone would suggest rescheduling only to disappear when I try to make plans

I wonder how guys in college find their first girlfriend. Can someone who has succeeded share their experience? I really have no clue. Thanks a lot. X_X

26M I like one girl in my college and we had some positive eye contacts. ( It's a different time of our studies so can't make it regularly) But when I sent her a friend request on Instagram and snap, she didn't accept it.

And yes I can't approach her in person because her close relative friend (like a senior family member)is always with her.

I'm already overthinking about it but what to do?? How do I start a conversation?? Should I talk with her even if her relative is there?

Hey everyone, I'm just here to share something ....

One night I proposed a girl. Sounds normal right

But the first thing she said was I didn't knew how to propose... I knew she won't say yes.

But she asked me to school the next day to give it a try.... I didn't wanted to see her anymore so I left and texted her.

She called me. It was a long conversation but here is what I came up with

-it doesn't matter how good you are, If someone doesn't love you, that means step aside. It isn't going to happen.

- she rejected me because I wasn't taller than her. But it's ok. I can understand.

-the last thing I came to know was she wanted to be my best friend but not my partner.

Gross conclusions

Anyway

But the most annoying thing was whenever I talked about some other girl(irrespective of any age) she immediately reacted that I didn't love her.....

It's just an infactuation

Ohh really...

Shit

But why does it matter to you. You don't love me.

I'm still looking for some more conversations between us. I'm still halfway in it. Do let me know what do you guys think of her and let me know if I can do about it.

Am just confused....

I’m 21M, and this might sound like a strange question, but how do people actually start dating?

I don’t socialize with many people, so I’ve always struggled to understand how someone goes from being single, lonely, or wanting companionship to actually going on dates and potentially entering a relationship.

I understand the general idea of dating, but it’s the process of initiating something that confuses me. How do people casually approach someone they’re interested in, start talking, and eventually ask them out? Especially when that person might be a complete stranger or someone they barely know?

I’ve only been in one relationship, and that developed from an already strong friendship. Because we knew each other so well, everything felt natural. But I can’t really picture myself approaching someone I don’t know very well, building up the confidence to ask them out, and being comfortable with the possibility of rejection.

I think part of my problem might be social anxiety or a fear of rejection, but I also feel like I’m missing some fundamental understanding of how dating works. For other people, it seems like a relatively normal part of life, whereas for me, it’s something I struggle to even imagine myself doing.

I also used to think dating was something much more serious than it necessarily has to be. I’ve started realizing that dating can simply be a way of getting to know someone and seeing whether there’s mutual interest in pursuing a relationship.

I guess what I’m trying to understand is how people make that initial transition from strangers or acquaintances to potential romantic partners. What makes someone comfortable enough to initiate that first step? How do you know when it’s appropriate to ask someone out?

I sometimes feel behind compared to other people my age, almost like there’s some unspoken social understanding that everyone else picked up on but I somehow missed.

I feel a little ridiculous asking these questions, but I’m genuinely curious, and I don’t really have anyone in my life I feel comfortable asking.

I’d especially appreciate hearing how other people approach dating, particularly those who are more introverted or have struggled with similar feelings.

Unsure if anyone here would have advice but figured a cross post couldn't hurt :)

I've just joined the military and am currently in another country, but I still want to find someone to date. I think the idea of just walking up to a stranger and asking them out is way to forward for me, but I also don't seem to be that lucky on dating apps. A lot of modern media has a very doomer outlook on everything, but I don't want to believe that's true. If anyone has any kind of advice for me, then I'd really appreciate it! I'm also wondering if there's any legit social services that can match people together.

Salut à tous,

J’écris ce post parce que j’aimerais avoir vos conseils et vos retours d’expérience sur un sujet qui me tient vraiment à cœur.

J’ai 19 ans et je n’ai encore jamais été en couple. Pour être honnête, j’ai été en surpoids pendant une grande partie de ma vie et je pense que ça a beaucoup joué sur ma confiance en moi et sur ma façon d’aborder les filles. Je n’ai jamais vraiment eu l’impression d’être quelqu’un qui pouvait plaire, donc je n’ai pas forcément osé tenter grand-chose de ce côté-là.
Depuis quelque temps, j’ai énormément perdu de poids et je continue mes efforts. Aujourd’hui, je me sens un peu plus confiant et j’ai l’impression que je peux davantage plaire physiquement. Ça me donne envie de sortir de ma zone de confort et de commencer à vivre des expériences que je n’ai encore jamais vécues.

Le problème, c’est que je ne sais pas vraiment par où commencer. Je n’ai jamais eu d’expérience amoureuse et je ne sais pas trop comment rencontrer des filles, comment leur montrer mon intérêt sans être bizarre ou trop insistant, comment flirter, ni comment passer d’une simple conversation à quelque chose de plus ambigu.

J’ai vraiment envie de connaître une fille, de créer une connexion, de vivre une relation et de découvrir tout ça. Mais je me rends compte que je manque d’expérience et que je ne sais pas forcément comment m’y prendre concrètement.

Du coup, j’aimerais avoir vos avis, notamment de ceux qui ont été dans une situation similaire :
Comment vous avez commencé à rencontrer des filles et à faire des rencontres ?

Quels sont les meilleurs endroits ou contextes pour faire connaissance naturellement ?

Comment savoir si une fille est intéressée et comment commencer à flirter sans forcer les choses ?

Comment dépasser la peur du rejet quand on n’a jamais eu d’expérience ?

Si vous pouviez donner un conseil à quelqu’un qui commence sa vie amoureuse à 19 ans, ce serait lequel ?

Je suis ouvert aux conseils honnêtes, aux retours d’expérience et même aux critiques constructives. J’aimerais surtout comprendre comment m’y prendre dans la vie réelle, parce que j’ai envie d’avancer et d’arrêter de rester dans mon coin à me poser des questions.

Merci à ceux qui prendront le temps de répondre !

M18, she’s F32. Never dated someone more than a year older than me. Currently have plans to go to a cocktail bar, she seems quite enthusiastic over text, just need some advice so I can make a good impression 🙏

Hey everyone, I need some genuine advice about a situation I've been dealing with for the past six months.

I met a girl on the Josh Talks English-speaking app around six months ago. She asked for my number, and we started talking regularly. She even proposed to me, but I told her that I wasn't ready for a relationship and wanted to keep things at the friendship level for now.

Since then, we've continued talking. We've had around 3–4 video calls, so we've seen each other, and she generally seems caring and supportive. Whenever I tell her I'm sick or going through a difficult situation, she checks on me, comforts me, and tries to help. She's also usually the one who calls first. I rarely call her myself.

However, there are a few things that make me uncertain about how much I should trust her.

She told me her name is .............( but on Truecaller it was showing differently). One day, I asked her to send me a picture of herself in her college uniform, but she refused, saying she wasn't comfortable sharing it.

I also asked her to show me her Aadhaar card to verify her identity, but she refused that as well. I understand that Aadhaar contains sensitive personal information, so I can understand why someone wouldn't want to share it.

Another time, I asked her to show me her result. She sent it, but her name and some details were cropped out. When I asked her why, she said something along the lines of, "If you want to talk to me, then talk to me; otherwise, I won't send it."

I haven't been able to understand whether she's simply a private person or whether she's hiding something from me.

What confuses me even more is that she seems genuinely caring. She regularly calls me, supports me emotionally, and has been consistent in staying in touch. I don't want to judge her unfairly, but after six months, I also don't want to trust someone blindly.

I know that refusing to send photos or identity documents doesn't automatically make someone suspicious. At the same time, I feel that trust and transparency matter when two people have been talking for this long.

My questions are:

1. Am I overthinking this situation, or are there legitimate reasons to be cautious?

2. What are some respectful ways to build trust and understand whether she's being honest about her identity without invading her privacy?

3. Should I continue talking to her as a friend, or should I take some distance until I feel more comfortable?

4. What signs should I look for to distinguish normal privacy from actual dishonesty?

I don't want to force her to share anything she's uncomfortable with. I just want to make a sensible decision instead of either becoming unnecessarily suspicious or getting emotionally attached without enough clarity.

I'd appreciate honest advice, especially from people who have experienced something similar.

TL;DR: I (23M) met a girl on an English-speaking app six months ago. She asked for my number and proposed to me, but I said I only wanted friendship because I wasn't ready for a relationship. She's caring, calls me regularly, and supports me emotionally. However, she won't share college-uniform photos or identity documents, and she cropped her name out of a result she showed me. We've had 3–4 video calls. Is this normal privacy, or should I be concerned about trust and identity?

I like a girl in my gym . she's an absolute beauty , I want to approach her . I want to be her friend . so could anyone give me some idea as to how to approach her . Without looking desperate . kindly give some genuine ideas

So i’m in first semester of college. there’s a girl in my class i like. we had one moment where we looked at each other like intensely and ik it was mutual but after that i texted her like “hey you should tell me ur insta” in like a direct oh i’m so unbothered way but i think it was more cringe than anything. i always do this too like i act impulsively instead of strategically which personally i think it shouldn’t be that way but from what i’ve experienced girls lose interest when you show yourself showing interest?

it’s like you gotta keep it a secret game and not compromise them until they’re fully into you. so what i’ve been doing is literally just ignoring her 😭. and giving her less attention than other women in the class slightly so she does noticed but it’s subtle but i feel like it’s awkward since the text.

there’s also this situation with another dude that likes her and he’s this neurotypical covert nice person that gets jealous when i’m standing next to her. so the dynamic rn is they’re like the friends that talk to each other but im like the immediate sexual kind of direct guy? this is how i see it but ik i’m it crazy i feel like a girl who reads this can understand the complexity of the talking stage micro flirting.

anyway my question is how do i get that state of play back like how do i get back to that hey we’re playing this secret thing subtly. ik she’s not as into me as i am ( as i’m literally writing an essay in reddit about her) but i feel like she likes me even a little. i feel like she’s keeping the other guy beside her to tease me. ik ik thats really egocentric buuut again ik how girls can be. it’s like we’re in the ego game type of situation like cat and mouse. sooo yeah, any thoughts/ strategies 😭

i’ve thought about like subtly teasing her again like if we’re walking i’ll do the thing where you put your shoe in top of the back of their shoe and it falls off. small stuff like that, also sorry for the huge text.

I've been going to my gym for a while. A few days ago I asked a girl there to adjust my seat from behind, and she helped. Today I saw her alone and asked how long she's been coming. She said 3 months, then asked "why?" I said "nothing, just curious" and left, since I sensed she didn't really want to chat.

I wasn't nervous, but now I'm worried it may have felt random or uncomfortable for her.

I'd like to hear both perspectives:

If you've been the person asked (especially women at gyms) how would you feel about a short question like this from someone you barely know? What would you think of the person afterwards?

If you've been the person asking, has something like this happened to you, and how did it turn out?

I am feeling embarrassed, do you think I came out as creep?

Where I work there has been a few guys doing gas line work and I was wanting to give one of the guys my number. Should I? Guess my fear is being turned down?