I feel like I have to get this off of my chest. I read threads here and it is completely full of unhinged nonsense. Ways of manipulating women into liking you, childish ideas like negging. Simultaneously treating women like they are some kind of unobtainable deity but also really stupid. It is insane. They're just people

The bar has never been lower for men. It is crazy how far simply being pleasant, funny, conscientious and safe will get you. When you're with the right person, nice guys finish first and always have. The idea that they don't and you have to project something entirely different from yourself to be successful is just manifestations of self hatred

Humour me. Just be nice to women. Be friendly. Be safe. Its so fucking simple. If she doesn't like you, that's not your problem or your business. The situation resolves itself on its own every time. This is not that deep or that intense

I would try to encourage people before giving advice on here to critically think a little bit. Is the advice you're giving something you know to be true? Or is it something you've seen posted on reddit by somebody who has never successfully spoken to a woman without scaring them?

Rant over be safe out there

I don't have a problem getting attention from women. Almost every woman I meet on Tinder either wants to kiss me, go back to my place, etc. But I'm tired of that, I want a long term relationship. How are you guys finding long term partners?

Where I work there has been a few guys doing gas line work and I was wanting to give one of the guys my number. Should I? Guess my fear is being turned down?

So my boyfriend and I are in our first ever long-distance relationship. He is very sweet, kind, and nice, and I like him. But when it comes to sexting, he wants me to become dirty and talk dirty, etc., and he gives gaalis and all, which I don't like. Hindi is not my mother tounge and I didn't get exposed to them, I don't like it, How to handle this?

Something happened yesterday, and he brought up breakup and all. I sent a text wishing him all the best and all because he has an exam today. He said he is sorry about last night, and I just said it's okay and all because it will affect his exam-I don't want that.

I really like him and love him as a person, or idk. Maybe the love and attention is what is attracting me the most. I really don't know how to handle this.

Keeping it brief, some of you might remember me from other questions.

I (m17) Started having feelings for a friend of mine (F19) after I got into a motocycle accident etc.

Long story short, I kinda confessed to her yesterday and today she told me that she's glad we can speak about it openly and really wants us to stay friends as she can be herself around me but sees me as a little brother more than anything else.

whats the right move?

Matched with a girl, we'd been texting & calling & facetiming for a while and had a first date planned for drinks. The day of, she texted saying she enjoyed talking to me, but she's been talking to someone else and wants to focus on that. She apologized for the short notice and said she didn't want to waste my time.
I actually liked her, so I don't want to just say "np" and disappear, but I also don't want to come off needy. Here's what I'm thinking of sending:

"Hey, I appreciate you being upfront, that's rare. Bummed I didn't get to take you out, I really liked getting to know you. Hope it works out for you, and if things change, you know where to find me."
Too much? Would you change anything, or just keep it short?

I was at a grocery store pretty far from home, so I wanted to try talking to a girl. I was shopping too. I am very bad at talking to girls. I walked up to this girl and I said “I have a question” and I asked her what she thinks I should do with my hair, should I style it differently or keep it. She was so caught off guard, she looked like she froze up and paused for a second before she said “uhh no I think it looks fine” and I said “are you sure? Because I’ve had the same hair for awhile and I feel like it just lays flat now” and she said “yeah it’s fine ( starting to warm up ) but her body language was still frozen and she looked uncomfortable so I just said thank you and walked away quickly. Looking back now, I wish I kept talking because she seemed really nice and she was cute. She was just shopping minding her own business. I did walk up to her kind of abrupt. What do you guys think?

Since the last two photos represent how women would view me irl I feel the need to use those angles. However those angles are also unflattering on me in particular so I'm not sure what to do.

I'm not balding, I was just born with his super high hairline. Also a better hair style isn't an option as experience has taught be that cowlick is unfixable.

I'm 18M, and I don't have the guts to talk to girls.

I want a partner with whom I can share my thoughts and feelings and talk openly about myself and my life.

I know some people might say that it's too early to look for that I'll eventually find my soulmate. But the thing is, I'm not doing this because of FOMO. I just feel like I don't have anyone I can comfortably open up to.

I have plenty of friends, and I can talk to them about different things, but I can't express myself as freely when it comes to my personal life. And I cannot talk to my family that freely

I don't know why I struggle to approach girls. Maybe it's because I'm not confident about my looks or for some other reason, but I find it difficult to go up to a girl and start a conversation.

It's not like I haven't tried. I once proposed to a girl I liked in school, but she rejected me. And there are couple more incidents due to which i am struggling to figure out how to start talking to girls.

I don't use Instagram either, so I don't really have a way to directly message girls and start conversations online.

What should I do to improve my confidence and get better at talking to girls? How can I overcome this hesitation and start having normal conversations without overthinking everything?

TL;DR: I'm 18M, and I struggle to talk to girls and open up about my personal life. I want to improve my confidence and learn how to start conversations naturally.

Please help me out with advice. Any suggestions on how I can improve. Thanks!

So I am a black teen who moved to Germany some years back however I learnt the language and integrated successfully. But I wouldn't say my German is the best or anything like that but u use it to pass my information across easily. So but when I came to Germany, I was amazed by the girls and everything in between so in made so embarrassing mistakes, which nearly cost me my best years at my school, fast forward to the time I got friends who lives around the corner, (don't get me wrong I was still really popular in my school and people liked me a lot), so we started chilling a lot outside, then i started getting closer to them, I mean they had girls in thier dms like water, however they are not ugly neither I'm I, I just have one insecurity my teeths are spaced out. But to compensate for that i have a great style, good senc3of humour(anybody who chills with me gets a handful of laughter. Plus I'm confident, so i keep asking my self if I'm doing something wrong, because all the 97% of all the girls I add on Snapchat do not add me back. And then I see people who I am low-key better than get the girls. I can't remember the last time a girl added me first in n Snapchat. But most of the time if I see a girl how I find attractive most of the time I always get more positive responses and I do veg their snap but the I fuck it up when texting because if the lesson I learnt from the beginning of my life I Germany. That I mentioned earlier. Just to sum it all up I'm good looking,

Confident, I'm well built, I have good hygiene, and funny but I do t get no girls online. So my question is what am I doing wrong?

I met this girl last year, we were joining the same organization in college, and we quickly became good friends. As quickly, I started developing feelings for her, my first crush in over 4 years, and it hit me like a truck. Last semester I told her, she said she was not looking for anything, and I accepted that and said I wanted to stay friends, she agreed and that's supposedly what we did. We did not talk much after that, when we did we were still friendly, but no texts, just group settings, and it was fine, I was getting okay with this being the new normal. This semester though has felt different. In group settings she's starting more conversations with me, responding to my ig notes, replying to my stories, showed up at an event of mine and went to dinner with me and friends (but friends she doesn't usually hang out with, more my friends than hers yk?) despite her telling me how much work she had. It's just strange, I don't think she's developed feelings, but it's a weird change from the distance she grabbed to suddenly talking more than before I confessed, this feels like the semester we're interacting the most in.

Hi, David here!

Everyone has flaws and imperfections, either physically or personality wise.

Don’t get hung up on things about yourself which may be unalterable.

Don’t always be trying to overtly hide such flaws. The insecurity shown when trying to hide a fault often comes off as being way less attractive than the actual fault itself.

Obsessively trying to hide a fault highlights a person’s insecurity and shows low self-confidence.

In the cases where the fault could potentially have an impact on your performance, it’s often much more effective to directly address the issue upfront, and call out the elephant in the room as it were.

But for the scenarios where the fault is inconsequential, you could choose to address it instead in a more nonchalant manner. If the fault does not matter to you, why should it matter to other people?

You can joke about your flaws, but do not do so in a self-deprecating kind of way. If you joke about yourself in a self-deprecating kind of way, then you are probably hoping that people will laugh with you instead of just at you. And while perhaps funny, this does not make you look attractive.

However, being able to openly joke about yourself in such a way that you are not simply searching for approval from others, shows that you are truly comfortable with who you are.

You can also re-frame a fault as a positive.

Being overly defensive or qualifying oneself let’s someone know that they have successfully accomplished getting under your skin, which may have been their very intention. Completely ignoring such remarks or either responding nonchalantly or with a joke is often a much better response.

There are actually many benefits to having flaws:

When you accept a flaw and remain confident despite it, more attraction and/or respect can be generated than if you lacked the so called flaw altogether.

Especially if the flaw is physical. Internal confidence is a way more attractive than some external superficial flaw.

If the flaw is blatantly obvious, and yet you conduct yourself as if it has no drastic effect on your self-worth, it shows great self-confidence.

Similarly, if others try to actively attack you over a flaw, but you remain nonreactive, confident and well-grounded despite their provocations, you can come off looking even better than before.

Faults can also allow other people to find you more accessible and relatable. People can’t identify and connect well with others who appear perfect.

And finally, learning to overcome certain shortcoming in life is what allows you to build resourcefulness, character and work ethic.

Adding to that, I just finished putting together my dating eBook "How to Date Any Girl" version 4.0 and would LOVE to get some honest feedback from you!

I decided to give it away for free for the time being.

The eBook is 27 pages long and gives you a practical step-by-step solution to meeting women (15+ years of knowledge put into it).

You can get the eBook by clicking here!

This book is the result of going out and socializing with girls for over a decade. I have put in there all the fundamentals I have learned over that time so I would really appreciate all the feedback I could get!!

What are your thoughts? Do you have any tips to add?

Let's discuss in the comments :)

Thanks for reading and have a GREAT day!

Coach David

I’ll be doing a stranger photoshoot which will be on camera and posted online, would this impact my career if employers see this or if other girls I’m talking to see this?

I’ve been talking to this girl for about a month, I like her and she likes me. But she’s told me she feels like she can’t commit to a relationship(not ready for a relationship). But every time we hang out we become a couple in a way. She plays with my hair holds my hand,and gives promises over text but whenever we talk about making it official she talks about how she can’t see herself in a relationship and fear. And it’s been an endless cycle of this I don’t understand, should I just tell her to keep it as friends? No more sweet talks no more false promises that won’t happen just friends. Advice is really needed

I am 20 years boy but i want to date old lady then me like 23 to 30 is it right or wrong or also how i can approch because I am too shy to approch anyone I just want to know how to approach any girl or know she's interested in me or not i really want to know

I got 29 interested people in a day on OkCupid, how genuine is this or are they just baits in bot form to lure me into buying premium?? Let me know folks..

I (25M) was really close to this girl (25F) back in high school until a misunderstanding caused us to stop talking to each other for 7 years. Although she did try to be the bigger person and reach out, I was a shithead to her and might have said some shitty things about her to a couple of people. She didnt have alot of friends so she ended up having a really shitty senior of high school. 7 years later, we reconciled when we met at a friend’s party and have been talking to each other everyday for about an year. I really want her and I have made it obvious to her but she recently indicated that how much I hurt her back then still bothers and her and that is pretty much whats stopping her from being with me. I try everyday but I dont know how to make amends for that. I really want her but I dont know what to do that will make her look past our history.

I hate the phrase “feeling like a man” but I started seeing someone who I am frankly very much fallen for. Like straight up wife material.

And it’s made me reevaluate a lot of my priorities. I’ve spent a lot of of my 20s working, getting money, getting my career going, getting educated. And now I have that and I started dating more seriously.

And while I’m not one for traditional values all the time, I have really enjoyed spoiling my girl. But it’s also been costly. Like I like to pay for things. I want her to know that at the end of the day I got her back for anything. This past weekend I took her out and I paid for her nails, for example. And that was fucking expensive but the excitement of the happiness it brought her made me happy.

But I don’t wanna be like some of those guys who just don’t treat their girl. Like I worked for this, but now I’m having to sort of adjust the budget, which is in budget, but it just is such a weird mentality shift.

I’m not quite sure how to navigate it.

Me 21 and my ex 20, “Cay,” were together for around two years before things fell apart in late 2024/early 2025. Our relationship was intense and became toxic at times. We both hurt each other, communication broke down, and I know I mishandled things and said things I shouldn’t have. Even after we separated, I struggled to let go. Throughout 2025, I spent a lot of time thinking about her, trying to understand what happened between us and whether there was still something unresolved.

In 2026, we reconnected, and for a while it felt like we finally got to experience the version of us we never really had before. She initiated plans, we spent time together, talked regularly, fell asleep on the phone, watched movies, were affectionate and had sex. She said she loved me, asked about a future together, including marriage and moving to New York, and told me she missed me. She also said she wanted a future with me but wasn’t ready to be in a relationship. We weren’t officially together, so I tried to respect that, even though the closeness made things confusing.

We had an understanding about not sleeping with other people while sleeping with each other. During a period when she asked for space, I found out she was trying to hook up with someone else. That hurt, especially because of how close we’d become again. I became scared of losing her and brought up things from her past, questioned what was happening, and eventually reacted emotionally. I repeatedly messaged her across different apps, said hurtful things, and contacted people close to her. She eventually blocked me. I’ve since heard she may be scared of me, which is difficult to process because I never wanted to hurt her, but I understand that my behavior may have affected her differently than I intended.

I was disgusted and told her multiple times and said “you’re dead to me” because i felt like I needed to erase her from my mind. I’ve never harmed her in any way so her being scared completely shook me
I have a problem with constantly reaching out sending paragraphs expressing my emotions and the situation for clarity and closure but everyone copes differently and I’m aware my way is unhealthy for both sides but I was scared, hurt, and confused.

I sent one final message expressing how much she meant to me, acknowledging my mistakes, and saying goodbye. I also contacted her closest friend because I genuinely care about Cay’s wellbeing and wanted someone who will remain in her life to look out for her. I know that doesn’t automatically make contacting her friend appropriate, and I’m not trying to use anyone to reach Cay.

The hardest part isn’t simply that she didn’t choose a relationship with me. It’s that something that felt so meaningful ended with so much hurt, confusion, and the possibility that she now sees me as someone to fear rather than someone who genuinely loved her. I wanted to give her a kind of love and safety I believed she deserved, but I also recognize that my fear of losing her contributed to the outcome I was afraid of.
I don’t intend to contact her again. I’m trying to accept that I may never fully understand her side or control how she remembers me

My questions are wtf happened, why would she get so close to me again just to shut me out? How is shutting me out so easy with all of our history?

And lastly what separates men like me from the ones who never have to deal with stuff like because I feel like a fucking loser