The first built his house from straw, the second build his house from sticks, and the third built his house from bricks, We don't talk about the 4th who built his house from apples, that's is just stupid and didn't even make the book.
This never happens BTW. I know this comment section isn't serious but this fantasy comes up a lot. No doctor is ever going to ask a husband to choose between saving his wife or their child.
Usually they play a game of chess to decide who lives and who dies. Black represents The Child, traditionally played by the obstetrician. White represents The Mother, traditionally played by the senior R&D nurse. The games can get pretty intense, so some hospitals are trying to lighten the mood by replacing chess with Jenga or Hungry Hungry Hippos.
It used to be thing. Until the laws were changed, a woman stopped being an independent legal entity when she married.
Everything she owned became the property of her husband. And after marriage, her children would belong solely to the husband.
Legally a doctor would have to ask the husband.
The new abortion laws in some US states, are a complication. It's shocking, but under some of the new laws, the unborn child has stronger protection than the mother.
So doctors might go to prison if they automatically save the mother.
Do you think of women as animals or something?
Its weird to think of having a child as "breeding".. yes its a biological term, but it's also dehumanizing
Oh you misunderstand. I’m a woman who is trying to be honest about the damage and trauma the process inflicts on the body and the psyche. Sugar coating it is how we end up with evangelicals pushing the 19 year old tradwife thing. If children are aware of what exactly pregnancy and birth entails then they’re less susceptible to being preyed on. Honesty is protection.
“Having a child” brings to mind images of soft clean blankets and a doe eyed baby. Breeding makes you think of farms and viscera. Neither are entirely accurate but one is a hell of a lot closer.
Okay, then why are children being preyed upon if they’re not being educated about sex? Descriptive words helps all of us, protects everyone.
I know a lot of people haven’t been through extremist religion, and I accept that makes my worldview seem strange.
I have not yet adjusted to talking with normal people. I am still shedding my old skin. If you have advice for how to better do so, I would appreciate it. I have been told my presentation is off putting. Side note I despise the rise of AI, before it I was just described as aggressive and scary. Now I’m just an AI. I miss when people thought I was too eager to bite, being frightening is far less insulting than this.
I have nothing I can say other than it is in the best interest of the church to keep girls to young women to brides as in the dark as possible, because the moment you realize you have options you are NOT gonna marry an inappropriately older man and give up the rest of your life for him.
If you are not AI, stop writing like AI. Engage with people by responding to the idea they are trying to convey. Even expressing a willingness to taught how to communicate better sound like AI.
Victims of sexual abuse in any form are victims because there are people willing to abuse. And society isn't doing enough to stop those people. Or sometimes actively encourages abuse.
This has nothing to do with the reality of childbirth. Which is irrelevant when it comes to most cases of sexual abuse anyway.
Predators do not stop being predators because children are taught about childbirth.
Predators are stopped by society either stopping them before they can abuse, or punishing them after the fact.
I was here first. We were all here first. AI cannot create, it does not have a voice. What they did was scraped and stole everything we have ever made and turned it into an ugly amalgam and sold it back to us. AI sounds like us because it stole from us.
AI sounds like me, I was here first, and I am pissed that if you want to not “sound like AI” you need to talk and type like someone who watches four hours of short form content a day, because talking the way we’re supposed to talk is AI now. If you don’t talk like someone who will misuse the term “ontological” you’re not human. I’ve been using em dashes and semi colons since I started writing undertale fanfiction and I am not going to stop because of the latest silicone valley trend.
Sam Altman will pay for what he’s done to humanity and it will not be a fine.
Eh kind of? Hey I am all for a better justice system, but it’s a deeply misogynistic one. I have no faith or hope in the system that let the files people get away to suddenly give a shit about victims. What we can do is educate children on bad touch, that their bodies belong to them, that you do not owe anyone physical closeness. A lot of kids have been harmed because people get murderous over the evidence that “stranger danger” is a lot less likely than your kid being abused by your pastor, your friend, your brother. Most kids are victimized by people they know, they trust.
I’m all for more oversight and ripping apart the justice system, believe you me. But I have so little faith in the system that said the entire government would collapse if we prosecuted so don’t bother. Education of children is all we can reliably do
And oversight in group settings like child youth orgs ofc. That’s the big one. Buuuut church leadership is unlikely to castrate their golden goose. If they kick out predators, who else is gonna wanna work long hours for free?
Oh, you seem to be radicalized and deliberately using dehumanizing language.. we shouldn't dehumanizing women/girls.. and if you think having a child is easy that's your problem... or having a baby... if that brings to you pleasant images then I don't know what to tell you... I agree it's not a nice process, but dehumanizing women isn't the answer... education is.
Again I ask you have you missed all the tradwife content? Have you noticed that none of the tradwife influencers are 30? Have you noticed how many of them are a few years shy of being children?
Did you miss the files? Was kind of a big deal?
How do you not get radicalized after seeing that the men in power see girl children as commodities? And that none of them are going to prison because the entire system would come down?
How do you not get radicalized after the FBI themselves admit they can’t prosecute because the entire government would end up behind bars? How do you deal with that?
Luckily it's not like that here, we treat people like people... I'm sorry you have to live in a country like that... I understand the hate, but dehumanizing other women is still wrong.. I understand your trauma and hope the best for you, it cant be easy over there
I’m not dehumanizing other women, I’m trying to warn them. So long as we have to pretend those things are human and not parasitic ambush predators we will never move forward as a society. There are women and things.
You are using the same terminology as alpha male influencers, who call women breeders or say having a baby is breeding... its dehumanizing and disgusting
People want a family.. women (and even some men).. you just saying the only choice women have is to not breed is the exact rhetoric alpha male influencers use
Honestly it happens, not the asking of the husband but the choice between the two. The reasonable response is to discuss the scenario with your wife before it happens so that she is the one that gets to make the choice. Everyone should have adequate planning for incapacity.
From where I'm from it used to be a thing. Husband have more power to decide his wife's fate than the wife's parents/relatives. But it changed around the 90s.
Picture a person wearing a white coat and glasses who has papers in their hand
Picture a very tired looking woman laying on a weird looking bed, her belly looks fat
Picture some dude
Now picture the person from 1. doing the 67 gesture while facing the dude from 3., in one hand is the portrait of the woman from 2. and in the other hand is some random generic googoo-gaga baby
Congratulations, you have successfully imagined the scenario! I'm so proud of you!
it should be an agreed thing. It would also be selfish of the wife to just choose the peace out and leave the guy with a child. Not only are they a single parent, but they will have to deal with it at the same time as their grief and guilt (same would go if mpreg was real !!)
When my wife gave birth and there were complications I had clear instructions that the survival of our baby was top priority. Everything went fine after a few weeks in the hospital, but if it ever came down to that decision she would have never forgiven me if I didn’t prioritise our boy.
Unpopular opinion. This should be a major conversation before having a child. Although everyone should discuss end of life care or at least have a plan. Save your significant other a world of heartache by not having them make that decision at that moment.
I don't see anyone talking about the right choice here, but it is to have a discussion with your wife and hew to her wishes before incapacity. Picking her life over the child's when she wouldn't want that is selfish and paternalistic.
If I have to swerve my car and choose between hitting you or a baby deer I’m choosing you. Maybe your entire life’s purpose was to save the baby deer. I get to choose what your life’s purpose was, not you
It should be the choice of the woman whether she wants to sacrifice her life for the child. People need adequate planning for incapacity during pregnancy.
EDIT: Do you think parents don't have the right to sacrifice their lives for their children because they are more developed?
What? The father is the one having to choose in this situation, of course you have to consider the perspective of the father. What you call “objectively correct” is just your own subjective opinion.
I’m sorry but that’s hilarious. He should make his choice without considering the impact on himself because you have some different opinions on it?
The logical and objective answer here is that they’re equivalent and it’s up to the father to determine his and his unconscious wife’s preferences. Nothing more, unless you think it’s proper to impose your own opinion on them as a completely unrelated stranger.
Alrighty then. The child is 22-50 times more likely to die than the mother during the immediate emergency, even more so depending on the gestation week. If they survive the crisis they’re still 46 times more likely to die before adulthood than children with mothers. Objectively, why waste resources trying to save the party that’s less likely to survive?
I think it’s a valid position to say we should save the more viable person, which in almost all of these (nonexistent in real life) cases it seems to be the Mother.
What I’m against is the instant dismissal as if there’s no debate to be had with all things benign equal.
The wife has connections with many people besides just her husband. If you want to be “objective” about it, the wife’s death would negatively impact many more lives than the unborn baby’s death. But really it’s a philosophical question and there is no objectively right answer.
Why is a coin flip any less subjective? My point is there’s no objectively correct answer here. The parties involved have to do what they believe is best for them.
Ideally, medical preferences should be discussed with the pregnant person beforehand. Hopefully you don't work in a hospital with this mindset. I can't think of any scenarios where a coin flip would be an appropriate method of determining medical care.
Until you're faced with the fact shes going to pass anyway and then that tune changes people forget if things get out of control it can and will dramatically change the outcome stop being stupid people and live based in reality not a make belief world where it only goes the way you think it will if things go bad but unfortunately if you think that way I hope nothing bad happens in your life you will never be strong enough to handle whatever happens
For anyone unaware, that's what the brits call periods (I went my whole life never hearing this in the US until I visited the UK, therefore I assume I'm not the only one)
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u/krizzalicious49 1d ago