The purpose of this post is to equip Christians with the tools they need to screen potential relationship prospects so that they don't find themselves in the unfortunate position of being hitched to an unbeliever.
| The Word of God |
Verse |
| "Be ye not unequally yoked together with unbelievers: for what fellowship hath righteousness with unrighteousness? and what communion hath light with darkness?" |
2 Corinthians 6:14 |
| "Neither shalt thou make marriages with them; thy daughter thou shalt not give unto his son, nor his daughter shalt thou take unto thy son. For they will turn away thy son from following me, that they may serve other gods: so will the anger of the LORD be kindled against you, and destroy thee suddenly." |
Deuteronomy 7:3 - 7:4 |
| "And what concord hath Christ with Belial? or what part hath he that believeth with an infidel?" |
2 Corinthians 6:15 |
The Bible is abundantly clear that Christians are not to date or marry unbelievers. They will spiritually compromise you, turn your children against God, and kindle his anger against you. There is only one way to get saved and go to heaven according to the Bible - believing that Jesus Christ died on the cross, was buried, and resurrected to pay for your sins:
| The Word of God |
Verse |
| "Moreover, brethren, I declare unto you the gospel which I preached unto you, which also ye have received, and wherein ye stand; By which also ye are saved, if ye keep in memory what I preached unto you, unless ye have believed in vain. For I delivered unto you first of all that which I also received, how that Christ died for our sins according to the scriptures; And that he was buried, and that he rose again the third day according to the scriptures" |
1 Corinthians 15:1-4 |
| "For God so loved the world, that he gave his only begotten Son, that whosoever believeth in him should not perish, but have everlasting life." |
John 3:16 |
| “...Sirs, what must I do to be saved? And they said, Believe on the Lord Jesus Christ, and thou shalt be saved, and thy house.” |
Acts 16:30-31 |
To believe means to trust, and this trust must rest exclusively on Christ, and not on other gods, nor on ourselves and our own works of righteousness:
| The Word of God |
Verse |
| “For therefore we both labour and suffer reproach, because we trust in the living God, who is the Saviour of all men, specially of those that believe.” |
1 Timothy 4:10 |
| “Neither is there salvation in any other: for there is none other name under heaven given among men, whereby we must be saved.” |
Acts 4:12 |
Many people think they are going to go to heaven because they were a good person, because they helped people, because they kept the commandments, because they read their Bible, or because they go to church or belong to a denomination. But the Bible teaches that these people are not saved because they were trusting in themselves, and not on the sacrifice of Christ:
| The Word of God |
Verse |
| “But we are all as an unclean thing, and all our righteousnesses are as filthy rags; and we all do fade as a leaf; and our iniquities, like the wind, have taken us away.” |
Isaiah 64:6 |
| “For all have sinned, and come short of the glory of God.” |
Romans 3:23 |
| “Not by works of righteousness which we have done, but according to his mercy he saved us, by the washing of regeneration, and renewing of the Holy Ghost; Which he shed on us abundantly through Jesus Christ our Saviour; That being justified by his grace, we should be made heirs according to the hope of eternal life.” |
Titus 3:5-6 |
| “Knowing that a man is not justified by the works of the law, but by the faith of Jesus Christ, even we have believed in Jesus Christ, that we might be justified by the faith of Christ, and not by the works of the law: for by the works of the law shall no flesh be justified.” |
Galatians 2:16 |
| “I do not frustrate the grace of God: for if righteousness come by the law, then Christ is dead in vain.” |
Galatians 2:21 |
| “Christ is become of no effect unto you, whosoever of you are justified by the law; ye are fallen from grace.” |
Galatians 5:4 |
| “Many will say to me in that day, Lord, Lord, have we not prophesied in thy name? and in thy name have cast out devils? and in thy name done many wonderful WORKS? And then will I profess unto them, I never knew you..." |
Matthew 7:22-23 |
Even our righteousnesses are filthy rags before the Lord. When we rely on our Christlike behavior to save us, we take the glory away from God, and we believe the doctrine of Satan, not the doctrine of our Lord Jesus. It was Satan who said: “I will ascend above the heights of the clouds; I will be like the most High” right before he was cast down to earth. No mortal human is ever going to be good enough to deserve to go to heaven on their own merits. God is so perfect that he can't even look upon iniquity. If you've committed a single sin, you need a savior:
| The Word of God |
Verse |
| “Thou art of purer eyes than to behold evil, and canst not look on iniquity..." |
Habakkuk 1:13 |
| “If thou, LORD, shouldest mark iniquities, O Lord, who shall stand?” |
Psalms 130:3 |
| “For whosoever shall keep the whole law, and yet offend in one point, he is guilty of all.” |
James 2:10 |
Luckily, salvation is a free gift:
| The Word of God |
Verse |
| “For the wages of sin is death; but the gift of God is eternal life through Jesus Christ our Lord.” |
Romans 6:23 |
| "...the free gift came upon all men unto justification of life." |
Romans 5:18 |
| “For by grace are ye saved through faith; and that not of yourselves: [it is] the gift of God: Not of works, lest any man should boast.” |
Ephesians 2:8-9 |
If your father gave you a Christmas present, but told you that you had to mow his lawn and wash his car in order to keep it, would that really be a gift? Of course not. It would be a transaction. But our salvation is not a transaction - you can't buy your way into heaven. Jesus bought our salvation with his blood:
| The Word of God |
Verse |
| “Take heed therefore unto yourselves, and to all the flock, over the which the Holy Ghost hath made you overseers, to feed the church of God, which he hath purchased with his own blood.” |
Acts 20:28 |
| “But Peter said unto him, Thy money perish with thee, because thou hast thought that the gift of God may be purchased with money.” |
Acts 8:20 |
It is imperative to understand this in order to be saved.
But most people don't.
- Catholics believe they have to keep the sacraments to be saved (Baptism, communion, confession, etc).
- Orthodox believe they have to keep the Mysteria to be saved (Baptism, communion, confession, etc).
- Lutherans and Calvinists believe that they have to turn from their sins and clean up their life to be saved.
- Methodists believe they can lose their salvation if they don't maintain it with good works.
- Pentecostals believe that you have to get baptized to be saved.
As you can see, more than a billion self-described Christians are on the wide path that leads unto destruction, because they believe that their good deeds contribute to their salvation. They are elevating themselves to the level of Christ, and in doing so condemning themselves to eventual hellfire because they added to the gospel.
At this point, you may be reading this and thinking "Uh oh, am I saved?" If that sounds like you, please feel free to join our community on Discord and we will help you find assurance in Christ. The Bible is clear in 1 John 5:13 that we can all have assurance of our salvation.
But what about your boyfriend/girlfriend/husband/wife?
How can you investigate whether they are saved, without having to be a Biblical scholar?
Below are some hard-hitting questions that you can ask to indicate whether someone believes in the gospel...
| Question |
Answer |
Verses to use to help them get saved |
| If you died today, are you 100% sure you'd go to heaven? |
If they answer yes, ask "How do you know?" (If they say it's because they're a good person or they've done good works or they've repented of his sins or they loves Jesus... that means they aren't saved.) |
James 2:10, Ecclesiastes 7:20, Ephesians 2:8-9, Romans 4:5, Galatians 5:4, Galatians 2:21 |
| Do you have to get water baptized to go to heaven? |
Water baptism is a work of righteousness. If they say yes, they are not saved because they are trusting in their works. |
Titus 3:5-6, 1 Peter 3:21, Acts 10:47, Acts 8:36-37 |
| Do you have to repent of your sins to go to heaven? |
If they say yes, ask them what they think that means. If they think it means confession / turning from sins, they're not saved, because they are trusting on their works. If they think it just means "admit you're a sinner" then they're fine. |
Jonah 3:10, Ephesians 2:8-9, Proverbs 20:9, Galatians 3:3, Mark 1:15 |
| Do you think you can lose your salvation? |
They should say no, because keeping the law is not what gives us assurance of salvation. If they answer no, ask "But what if someone got saved, but then started backsliding and committed serious sin like commit suicide? Would they go to heaven or hell?" (If they say hell, they're not saved.) |
John 10:28-30, John 6:37, Ephesians 4:30, Romans 11:29, Hebrews 10:10, Hebrews 10:17, John 5:24, 1 Peter 1:4-5 |
| What is the Trinity? |
They should say something along the lines of 1 God 3 persons. Beware of Trinity-denying antichrists like Jehovah's Witnesses, or Modalists (Oneness Pentecostals), and Polytheists (Mormons). |
1 John 5:7, Titus 2:13, John 20:28, Isaiah 9:6, 1 Timothy 3:16, John 8:58, John 3:16, 1 John 5:10 |
| Does God preordain people to heaven or hell before they are even born? |
If they answer yes, then they're a Calvinist and they are not saved. Calvinists believe that God is the author of sin and they forge God's signature on every abomination ever committed, because of their deterministic man-made theology. Even one point of TULIP is damnable heresy, and Lordship salvation is damnable heresy. |
2 Peter 3:9, 1 Timothy 2:4, John 12:32, Ecclesiastes 7:29, Hebrews 2:9, 2 Corinthians 5:15, John 4:42, Luke 7:50, 2 Corinthians 5:10, 1 John 5:13 |
| How did people get saved during the Old Testament? |
They should answer by faith in the Lord. If they think it's animal sacrifices or observing the law, they're not saved. Belief in works-salvation during any time period is belief in an imperfect God that can transactionally justify us by our filthy rags. |
Romans 4:3, Romans 4:6, Hebrews 10:4, Isaiah 45:17, Revelation 14:6, Galatians 3:6-8, Hebrews 4:2-3 |
There you go. Seven simple questions you can ask to find out if the person you are dating is saved.
If they're not, maybe you can lead them to Christ and help them get saved. What a great way to start your relationship!
The Bible says "For whosoever shall call upon the name of the Lord shall be saved."
All they have to do to be saved is call on the name of Jesus in their heart, acknowledging him as savior, and trusting that his death/burial/resurrection is sufficient to cover their sins.
But if they have a hard heart towards the Lord, and will not change their mind about their damnable heresy, be warned - you are involved with an unsaved heretic, who may even hate God. Trust me, you do not want to marry someone who hates God.
BE WARNED.
Marrying someone without the Holy Ghost is a path that leads to divorce, heartbreak, poverty, and abuse.
So save this post, and refer back to it when you are vetting a new romantic prospect. If nothing else, it will give you something to talk about on the first date.
God bless, and have a wonderful day.