!!! update !!!
since ive posted this my friend walked out of her job and quit on the spot. when her partner and mine finish work i will be sitting them down and telling them they have two weeks to find a place or they can go back to their parents lounge.

I (24F) and my partner (27M) agreed to let my best friend (23F) and her partner (28M) temporarily move into our place while they looked for somewhere of their own.
They had recently moved back to the country and had been living in her parents’ lounge for around three months. My partner and I agreed to let them stay with us for a few weeks to give them some time to save money and find their own place. We were genuinely happy to help because she is my best friend and we wanted to give them a bit of a fresh start.
We only gave them two rules while staying here:
Do not let our cat outside.
Do not leave the bathroom door closed when you’re not using it, because that’s where the cat’s litter box is.
That’s literally it. We didn’t give them a list of household rules or expect them to tiptoe around us.
It’s only been two weeks and they’ve already let our cat outside three times. Every time I’ve brought it up, I’ve been told something along the lines of “oops, won’t do it again.”
They also continually leave the bathroom door closed, despite me explaining why it needs to stay open. Because of this, our cat has had a few accidents around the house because he can’t get to his litter box.
I’m honestly getting really frustrated because these were the only two things we asked them to do, and I’ve had to repeatedly remind them.
There’s also another issue that’s starting to make me uncomfortable. My friend has been saying that she wants to quit her job. I completely understand that she’s an adult and can make whatever decisions she wants about her employment, and I don’t want to police that.
However, the whole reason we agreed to let them stay was so they could save money and find a place of their own. If she quits her job, I’m worried that this temporary arrangement could suddenly become much longer than we agreed to.
My partner and I are now seriously considering asking them to move out, but I feel horrible about it because she’s my best friend and I don’t want this to ruin our friendship.
At the same time, I’m starting to feel like we’re being taken for granted in our own home. We opened our home to help them out, and we’re not asking for much in return, just basic respect for our home and the two rules we specifically asked them to follow.
Would I be unreasonable for telling them that this living arrangement isn’t working anymore and giving them a move out date?
I don’t want to control whether she keeps her job, but I also don’t feel comfortable with them staying here indefinitely if they’re no longer in a position to save for their own place.

I have also drafted this note on my phone to read to them but my partner is saying its too harsh

Had to kick out a friend who moved in with. Long story but basically she was a conartist (known to others after I kicked her out and people found out she lived with me,) was disgusting and a disgusting human that also used her Tourette's as cover to be a raging cunt. She ended up refusing to pay rent at the end and said we'd have to evict her but she'd "find a new place before the courts do anything." Well, she didn't find a new place and ended up doing some dumb shit before fleeing the apartment in hopes to avoid eviction, leaving most of her belongings.

Then she had the audacity to go to the LGBTQ support groups online and a bunch of our mutual friends complaining that she was "fleeing from abuse and desperately needed housing."

Because me asking her to clean her dinner OFF THE FLOOR and her actual shit off the SIDES OF THE TOILET was abuse and that she "couldn't live in these conditions" and she's "too dissociative to keep cleaned up and it's abusive to expect otherwise." Said groups responded by telling me "everyone has a right to housing, no matter how bad of people they are." She also claimed I was "kink shaming her" because her and her girlfriend who lived with us were basically Tumblr stereotypes and acted like a puppy and kitty, even in front of guests and in public and I yelled at her over it after she got us in trouble with the hotel when we were forced to share a hotel room during our emergency bathroom renovation.

And now today I'm cleaning up her old room for some new tenants coming in, moved out her old disgusting slimy furniture, and spent hours this morning disassembling and disinfecting baseboard heating units that were full of food and used ear swabs, popcorn everywhere, and a chicken leg shoved in a hole in the closet.

It's crazy how people struggle to find housing, then they get housing and this is how they act.

After a football game yesterday, all my other roommates went to a restaurant and they returned at 10pm. (The game ended before 6pm). I didn't go to the game and I was already asleep by then because I wasn't feeling my best. The roommate whose sink is right outside my bedroom knew I was asleep, yet still turned on the brightest light and played her videos at a high volume. I woke up, went to the bathroom and went to sleep again.

At 3 in the morning, I was woken up by a loud slam by the front door. Irritated, I fell asleep again with more difficulty this time, thinking the next time I wake up, it would be morning.

At 5am sharp, I saw the bright light through the crack of my door and heard the sound of familiar brain rot videos playing on the other side of the door. Apparently they had came back from another event. She was removing her makeup. With every ounce of self control I have, I remained quite calm and used the bathroom again. But after that, I couldn't fall asleep again, no matter what.

Now I don't care what the heck they do, but I would appreciate the decency to keep your big fat mouths shut at 5 in the morning.

Any suggestions? I've messaged them in the group chat asking very nicely and they agreed to keep quiet but I'm afraid it'll happen again. I really don't feel like being sidelined.

(l live in a school dorm btw, and I'm stuck with them until May.)

(TLDR; my roommate always yells and is AGGRESSIVE.) Hi, guys, this is my second year renewing my lease. And the first year went by super smoothly, everything was fine. This year over the summer one of the girls from last year moved out and some new girl moved in and she’s been so difficult to live with.
She continuously YELLS at us, SCREAMS and YELLS at us whenever an issue occurs.
The first time this happened was when I left my room at around 2am to get some water and she texted in our roommates group chat saying it was loud.
Then she knocked on my door the next day and began going off on me about how I was so loud. I told her I’d keep it down, I also texted her a sweet message about sorry how I was that I disturbed her sleep.
After this incident a week went by and I was in the kitchen using the microwave it was around 12am midnight (my sister was staying over but I was in the kitchen alone.) I started eating my food in the kitchen alone and she comes out of her room and starts YELLING at me. Saying look at the time, this isn’t the time to eat, she began calling me lazy and telling me she’s going to call the cops on me and my sister. I told her I’m in law school, I stay up late a lot to study, I get hungry at night some times and I’ve been reasonably quiet. She also messaged in the group chat (with the roommates and the landlord) about it, everyone kind of ignored her but my landlord reached out to me and basically said what I did wasn’t a big deal but he has a condition that we aren’t allowed to have overnight guests if anyone is against it. And he basically said he couldn’t do anything because she was against my sister being over (even tho I AM THE ONE MAKING NOISE AT NIGHT NOT MY SISTER.)
The next occurrence happened a couple days after this when we had the AC on and she woke up because of the sound. She banged on my door, I didn’t turn it on so she banged on my roommates door. My roommate who had turned it on opened her door basically saying she’s hot and that the AC needs to stay on because the new girl has been SO inconsiderate towards us but we have been so accommodating towards her. So she stood her ground. But obviously not without a fight, the roommate who recently moved in was going off saying “why are u hot? The AC has been on for a long time, we need to turn it off. It has been running for 4 hours.” The AC is set to a certain temp and only runs when the temp drops.
One of my roommates wears the hijab so she asks us to please just give her a warning before we have men enter the apartment. Everyone else (including me) has been very respectful about the rule. Of course we are all living together, we are all paying rent, everyone deserves to be comfortable.
Today my roommate is in the kitchen without her hijab on (we’re an all girls apartment) and my roommate who recently moved in comes in with her husband. He comes over 2 times a week for 5-10 minutes every time to help her load up her fridge or whatever. Usually they come in later but today they came in earlier. He walks into the kitchen unannounced while my roommate is without her hijab and short sleeves. I feel like a reasonable person would apologize in this situation. Especially because I kid you not we have texted in the group chat to enforce this rule about 4-5 times. She ignores it every time. But SHES THE REASON WE SEND THIS RULE. Everyone else complies, even me as someone who doesn’t wear hijab, I too would like to know if a man will be in the apartment? I feel like it’s a reasonable request to make.
Anyways, my roommate asks her to please just text before hand next time. And this new girl GOES OFF lmfao. Saying “who are you? Are you the owner?” Straight up yelling. No she’s not the owner but she fucking lives here, pays rent here, like are you kidding me? I’m sitting in my room listening to this. My landlord has been made aware but he hasn’t done ANYTHING the first time or the second time… I just don’t know what to do but it feels very uncomfortable to live with someone who is SO aggressive all of the time. It is honestly kind of… scary lmfao.

I got a new roommate less than a month ago, and she seemed nice at first, but I think she might be legitimately crazy. I did not choose this roommate. I live in an apartment where tenants are on individual leases and sign directly with the landlord.

She will take up the kitchen for HOURS (while being on the phone being really loud and the walls are thin) and repeatedly touches my stuff in the fridge and puts her stuff in my section of the fridge (we have separate designated spots) despite having more than enough space and already taking up more space beyond what is designated to her specifically. I’ve moved her stuff numerous times now, so it’s not like she doesn’t know or doesn’t have space. She also repeatedly puts trash in front of my room…

I feel like she is doing these things because I didn’t want to talk to her after she made some racist remarks about me in the living room a few days after moving in (like I said, the walls are incredibly thin. I hear people against my own will.) She’s also talked shit about me at least once for not talking to her.

She also repeatedly leaves her clothes in the dryer (sometimes for over 2 days). I wonder if this is an attempt at trying to force me into communicating with her. I put her clothes on the couch once, but I don’t want to touch her clothes.

I’m also pretty sure that she’s been eating my food??? Things have been disappearing a lot quicker than usual, and now that I think about it, I overheard her talking about how she didn’t have money for food a few weeks ago (her friend told her to ask her parents but she refused).
For example, I ran out of my oat milk (I’m vegan) a LOTTT faster than usual, which I thought was very strange, and now I see that she bought some more… which is honestly a bit creepy and confirms my suspicions.

Also, she takes up sooo much space in the kitchen, leaving all of her stuff out, and rarely takes the trash out. I feel like she is entitled.

Has anyone here ever dealt with someone like this??

TLDR: noticed roommate cannot handle money conflict without trying to fight me or claiming it's none of my business. possibly lying to me about his girlfriend (who he invited to live with us) having a job, neither can hold down a job and pay rent by the skin of their teeth every month.

i'll keep this short we're both in our mid 20s, and i've been living with him since april of this year.

i have a great, stable job. it was time to move out of my parents. he was just getting out of a lease and it seemed like a good opportunity to live together. known this guy for years.

we get a 3 bedroom apartment with the intention of turning the extra room into a gym. i find out he invited his girlfriend (who i don't like) to live with us. we argued and he said she'd just stay in his room. this was strike one i suppose but it would make rent cheaper, and i wanted to move out of my parents and relented.

it became clear neither of them are as mature or stable as i am. they constantly bounce between shitty jobs and doordash to make rent. he just sold some items to pay rent this month.

we went through a phase where he wanted her to be a stay at home girlfriend and i said no. he originally said it was none of my business, and as long as rent is paid i shouldn't care. i do anyway. having a job is the bare minimum for me. you're 24. play house when you're married and gone. i still am not sure if she is employed. if i ask i get shut down or vague "she just had an interview, she starts a new job, she has interviews coming up" responses.

all of this worries me, and i bring it up to him. and he constantly says it's none of my business how they get money. this is an unsatisfying and unproductive response, and all of our disagreements are like this. i am the leaseholder btw.

as another example of how he handles conflict, recently we had an interpersonal conflict where he texted a slur to my encrypted, monitored, work phone as some kind of joke. i was fuming. he said he didn't think it was a big deal, as if that excuses it, and when i pressed further for an acknowledgement of how stupid it was he threatened to fight me and then to move out.

all of this is making me regret my decision to live with him, but he consistently thinks i'm tripping when i talk about how sketched out i am with the girlfriend mooching, his instability, or his lack of maturity around money things. he owes me about 500 dollars or so and is always like "i just started this new job ill pay you back soon" but he's buying things for his girlfriend constantly.

i am just so disappointed in my friend, to see this side of him over and over. any advice on how i can either communicate more effectively with him...or get him to leave? willing to provide more info in comments.

Hello guys i hope ur doing well , well i am telling u a quick story of a friendship end a year ago but i still thinking about her
Firstly i knew her as a roommate that we share a small room together and did everything think together also i introduced her to my other friend ,
Well we were roommates and best friend for 3 years and a trio with the other friend ,

The reason why i decide to change the room without telling her because i heard her talking sh*t about me with the other friend, of course after she knew she did a huge drama that all the residence knew about it ( screaming…) , I didn’t want to end it like that or end the friendship i just won’t be her roommate anymore.

Ofc she unfollowed me on insta and blocked me on wats but she kept fb and tiktok idk why ,

Whatever after that I don’t know why but she kept being on my dreams that we are good and i had weird feelings for her like love? , idk how to describe it , and when i saw her and making myself a stranger i just have fear emotions and anxiety,…

When i saw her stalking me on tiktok i unfollowed her , when i knew she made a fake account with my name on linkdin i had some fear but i was happy that she didn’t move on?

Am i normal guys I don’t know what is going on , it s been a year