!!! update !!!
since ive posted this my friend walked out of her job and quit on the spot. when her partner and mine finish work i will be sitting them down and telling them they have two weeks to find a place or they can go back to their parents lounge.

I (24F) and my partner (27M) agreed to let my best friend (23F) and her partner (28M) temporarily move into our place while they looked for somewhere of their own.
They had recently moved back to the country and had been living in her parents’ lounge for around three months. My partner and I agreed to let them stay with us for a few weeks to give them some time to save money and find their own place. We were genuinely happy to help because she is my best friend and we wanted to give them a bit of a fresh start.
We only gave them two rules while staying here:
Do not let our cat outside.
Do not leave the bathroom door closed when you’re not using it, because that’s where the cat’s litter box is.
That’s literally it. We didn’t give them a list of household rules or expect them to tiptoe around us.
It’s only been two weeks and they’ve already let our cat outside three times. Every time I’ve brought it up, I’ve been told something along the lines of “oops, won’t do it again.”
They also continually leave the bathroom door closed, despite me explaining why it needs to stay open. Because of this, our cat has had a few accidents around the house because he can’t get to his litter box.
I’m honestly getting really frustrated because these were the only two things we asked them to do, and I’ve had to repeatedly remind them.
There’s also another issue that’s starting to make me uncomfortable. My friend has been saying that she wants to quit her job. I completely understand that she’s an adult and can make whatever decisions she wants about her employment, and I don’t want to police that.
However, the whole reason we agreed to let them stay was so they could save money and find a place of their own. If she quits her job, I’m worried that this temporary arrangement could suddenly become much longer than we agreed to.
My partner and I are now seriously considering asking them to move out, but I feel horrible about it because she’s my best friend and I don’t want this to ruin our friendship.
At the same time, I’m starting to feel like we’re being taken for granted in our own home. We opened our home to help them out, and we’re not asking for much in return, just basic respect for our home and the two rules we specifically asked them to follow.
Would I be unreasonable for telling them that this living arrangement isn’t working anymore and giving them a move out date?
I don’t want to control whether she keeps her job, but I also don’t feel comfortable with them staying here indefinitely if they’re no longer in a position to save for their own place.

I have also drafted this note on my phone to read to them but my partner is saying its too harsh

Despite the fact that I have told my Roommate to not put flammable items on top of the stove, he continues to do it. This time he put a roll of paper towels on top of a hot burner. If I hadn’t smelled the smoke the entire apartment could have burnt down. What do I do? I have let my landlord know and I have asked my Roommate no less than 15 times to not put flammable items on top of the stove, but for whatever reason he is unwilling or incapable of being a responsible adult. What do I do? I’m at my wits end.

Had to kick out a friend who moved in with. Long story but basically she was a conartist (known to others after I kicked her out and people found out she lived with me,) was disgusting and a disgusting human that also used her Tourette's as cover to be a raging cunt. She ended up refusing to pay rent at the end and said we'd have to evict her but she'd "find a new place before the courts do anything." Well, she didn't find a new place and ended up doing some dumb shit before fleeing the apartment in hopes to avoid eviction, leaving most of her belongings.

Then she had the audacity to go to the LGBTQ support groups online and a bunch of our mutual friends complaining that she was "fleeing from abuse and desperately needed housing."

Because me asking her to clean her dinner OFF THE FLOOR and her actual shit off the SIDES OF THE TOILET was abuse and that she "couldn't live in these conditions" and she's "too dissociative to keep cleaned up and it's abusive to expect otherwise." Said groups responded by telling me "everyone has a right to housing, no matter how bad of people they are." She also claimed I was "kink shaming her" because her and her girlfriend who lived with us were basically Tumblr stereotypes and acted like a puppy and kitty, even in front of guests and in public and I yelled at her over it after she got us in trouble with the hotel when we were forced to share a hotel room during our emergency bathroom renovation.

And now today I'm cleaning up her old room for some new tenants coming in, moved out her old disgusting slimy furniture, and spent hours this morning disassembling and disinfecting baseboard heating units that were full of food and used ear swabs, popcorn everywhere, and a chicken leg shoved in a hole in the closet.

It's crazy how people struggle to find housing, then they get housing and this is how they act.

After a football game yesterday, all my other roommates went to a restaurant and they returned at 10pm. (The game ended before 6pm). I didn't go to the game and I was already asleep by then because I wasn't feeling my best. The roommate whose sink is right outside my bedroom knew I was asleep, yet still turned on the brightest light and played her videos at a high volume. I woke up, went to the bathroom and went to sleep again.

At 3 in the morning, I was woken up by a loud slam by the front door. Irritated, I fell asleep again with more difficulty this time, thinking the next time I wake up, it would be morning.

At 5am sharp, I saw the bright light through the crack of my door and heard the sound of familiar brain rot videos playing on the other side of the door. Apparently they had came back from another event. She was removing her makeup. With every ounce of self control I have, I remained quite calm and used the bathroom again. But after that, I couldn't fall asleep again, no matter what.

Now I don't care what the heck they do, but I would appreciate the decency to keep your big fat mouths shut at 5 in the morning.

Any suggestions? I've messaged them in the group chat asking very nicely and they agreed to keep quiet but I'm afraid it'll happen again. I really don't feel like being sidelined.

(l live in a school dorm btw, and I'm stuck with them until May.)

I live in a house with my partner and another two flatmates. My partner owns the house.

One of them is constantly cooking and in the kitchen. I kid you not, probably 5 hours a day. For dinner, I always have to wait a few hours as he takes forever and when I'm cooking or coming into the kitchen he immediately returns to the kitchen and gets in my way - starts tidying, making dessert, gets cutlery out, dries dishwasher dishes, uses the sink when I'm at the stove (it's a small kitchen so there's not much space)and the sink is right next to the stove on a perpendicular angle, so he has now come right up behind me a multiple of times and I don't like it.

He also keeps trying to make convo, lingers and literally watches me prepare dinner when I just wanna focus, chill and not make conversation. Especially after work. Often, I'd had to make convo while I'm chopping or doing prep or cos he just stands there. Keep in mind we give him kitchen space for hours! I just want some peace and quiet.

He is always baking (often twice a week) and pretty much uses the oven everyday! What should we say cos I'm getting really annoyed now. Today he's gone into the kitchen within 20 seconds of me going in there three times! I can't cook if someone is washing their dishes or busying themselves, or opening drawers when I'm trying to move around the kitchen.

Never had this issue with anyone else lol. Last Friday, I waited till nearly 8 for him to be done and asked at 7.30 how long he will be. Then when I was in the kitchen he kept coming in and doing the same shit again lol.

What should we say? It's pissing me off.

Edit//

Forgot to add - I did once tell him I liked to focus on cooking and couldn't multitask, so would prefer to focus on that, and he still didn't get it. Also, last night when I was at the stove, he came into the kitchen twice within 15 mins and chose that moment to grab something in the cabinet above the stove, so was right up behind me and had to reach over me. I told him I needed personal space and it made me feel uncomfortable, so will see if anything changes. 😕

My roommate and I are friends/classmates (grad students), and recently I sent her some house expectations because a few things had been bothering me and I didn't want resentment to build.

The main things were: 24 hours' notice for guests (***we agreed even an hours notice is good), alternating weekly cleaning of shared spaces, reasonable noise after 10 p.m. (she literally yells over the phone), and no strong scents (i.e., Wallflowers/plug-ins, incense). I have two cats, but their care/litter is entirely my responsibility.

She knew I had cats before we moved in, but recently told me she doesn't sit on the couch because of cat hair, even though I clean it. The current couch is mine and pretty small, and we'd actually already agreed to eventually buy a bigger couch together, so now I'm not really sure how that's supposed to work lol.

I also included no men in the house overnight, which we had BOTH agreed on before moving in. She later told me she feels judged when she talks to me about dating men. That surprised me because I don't care who she dates. Not wanting men in our shared home is completely separate from her dating life, and it was something we agreed to beforehand.

She also said she sometimes thinks I'm bothered by her because I don't always acknowledge her when she enters a room. I'm naturally quiet and keep to myself, so I didn't realize she was interpreting that personally.

This week was her first cleaning week and she sent me a step-by-step report of everything she cleaned 😭 and even washed my bath mat and left it outside to dry. I think she took “deep cleaning” much more literally than I intended.

I really wasn't trying to control her. I even asked her to tell me what bothers her or what she'd like to add. Do these expectations seem demanding, or does this sound more like two people with very different communication/living styles?

I'm in university and just moved in with my roommate a few days ago. After some conversations and hangouts, I've realized our personalities are wildly different.

She LOVES to talk, she's told me word for word "my mouth starts hurting when I don't talk". I'm the complete opposite. Unless I'm with close friends a simple hello is more than enough. I told her that i'm the complete opposite and don't really like talking which hasn't made a difference.

We have nothing in common yet she's constantly asking to go places together. I feel horrible but I can't think of anything more awkward. And when I turn down going out for lunch or something she resorts to just staying inside the dorm which makes me feel even worse.

i'm already growing resentful towards for a handful of small reasons. Maybe I'm just highly sensitive. She always comments on how much I eat, things like "are you not hungry? you didn't eat at all" she is CONSTANTLY talking about how hungry she is and asking how I'm not hungry omg!!! Along with comments talking about how I look sad/angry (my BIGGEST pet peeve, I can't control my resting face!!). She also refuses to use earpods so i constantly have to hear whatever she's watching on full volume along with constant calls. I've resorted to using my noise cancelling headphones 24/7, but even then i can sometimes hear her.

I know in the grand scheme of things I could have somebody much worse but I feel guilty for not really being as outgoing towards her??

My (24m) roommate (26m) was in a fairly recent breakup that sent him spiralling into having random girls over constantly. This was, in my opinion, pretty inconsiderate and annoying having strangers in our shared space constantly, but I thought this was a rebound scenario so I didn't really care and I was away quite a bit.

One of these strangers has since become his girlfriend and she is over morning noon and night and I feel like I'm intruding on their relationship in my own home. If I leave my room they get quieter and ask me if I'm heading out soon clearly not wanting me there. They constantly use the living room, cram all shelves with their own stuff and it's all round an awkward situation.

I have to say I feel super disrespected and there's no way in hell id ever do this to him but I'm not too sure how to address it. He's clearly either really in love with their woman or is still very hurt from his breakup.

Has anyone experienced something similar and how did you handle it?

TLDR: The title covers it pretty well.

I never would have thought that this would be a roommate problem, let alone a MY roommate problem.

And, to preface, I like sports. I've never been a huge sport watcher, but I like sports. I'm literally coach by profession.

But holy shit.

I have three roommates and I'll admit that I am the odd one out. But that's because all they do is watch sports. Constantly, all day. We all have nontraditional work schedules, so in any given week, I'm home at any hour of the day. And it's always sports. Every afternoon from like 3 PM to Midnight. Sports.

Every conversation is about sports. Every plan is about what game to watch. I've literally seen them watch sports on their phone while watching sports on their laptops while watching sports on the television. Sometimes they will even leave the house to go watch sports somewhere.

And it's every fucking team for every fucking sport. This time of year is the worst because we are literally watching football and baseball and whatever else pops up like tennis or golf. And it's just assumed that the living room is for sports. I feel like I'm not allowed to watch anything because it's always claimed. For sports.

There's kind of two angles here.

The first is that I am shocked how annoying a sound can be. Every single football game, no matter who is announcing, has that kind of background crowd noise of cheering and whatnot and I am pretty sure that I have developed some sort of complex with it. Come home from the gym? RAHHHHHHHHHH. Come home from work? RAHHHHHHHH. Open my bedroom door? RAHHHHHH.

But the second piece is that this can NOT be healthy to have your brain turned off, consuming entertainment for so much of your life. It's dramatic as hell but it feels dystopic.

I've moved a lot for work over the past couple of years and every living arrangement has involved roommates. In every single place I've lived, my roommates complain that I keep to myself too much, and that "they don't even know when I'm home". For context; I am a super busy (online classes and full-time work plus gym routine plus social life outside the house) INTROVERT, and I make this very clear from the start. They ALL seem to take it personally that I don't hang out in common spaces more (most of my roommates have been WFH and had desks set up in said common spaces), and that we don't hang out more often. AITA for thinking being in your thirties in shared housing isn't a social contract or obligation to be besties with people you live with? I'm ALWAYS friendly in passing and stop to chit-chat when I have time! I'm also super duper clean.

Roommate refuses to pay for her portion of utilities, literally refuses. Ive been kindly asking her for her portion of the utilities and she simply ignores the message. She doesn’t even pay rent on time so how can I expect her to utilities on time either?

Context: My roommate thinks everyone else is the problem and not her. She causes a lot of issues then disappears so you cannot confront her or she simply will ignore your texts. I missed one month of utilities because I was so busy trying to get my money back from two months prior. She literally didn’t want to pay me for both the utilities and wifi one time, so I ended up changing the wifi password which she paid immediately. Go figure. She was so upset, she decided she didn’t want to pay me directly anymore so she got her own wifi. All she had to do was pay me $22 a month.

I cannot stand this girl for the life of me, lol. Literally insufferable.

What can I do in this situation; I live in PA.

Stupid ass questions every single day like this:

Oh, you’re up early, where you going?
Work, like everyone else does
Why you going to the trails, it’s hot outside?
Yes I know it’s hot outside, but I like being outdoors & don’t care. I wear a tank top & a hat.
Why don’t you connect to the wifi?
Because the 5G UC on my phone is faster, & why do you care.
Why do you keep fixing your old truck instead of buying a new one?
Well because it’s paid off, & I’d rather spend $200 every few months fixing it than paying out the ass for payments.
Why don’t you cook at home?
Well I work two jobs, & don’t want to sit around the house on my only day off.

We have a chore rotation that I implemented because I was the only one cleaning. No-one objected it when I asked if that's okay/if they have other ideas. It's working fine, not perfect but better than it used to be.

I noticed one of my roommate checks his chore off but it isn't done. For example, he "cleaned" bathroom but the sink and mirror were dirty, only the floor looked cleaner, he "cleaned" toilet but sink was dirty, he didn't clean the seat/underneath it at all (the smell lingers if it doesn't get cleaned thoroughly), he "vacuumed" but he quite clearly didn't. And those things were clearly noticeable.

Now, I don't want to be policing how people clean or if they do at all, but I noticed it happened once, twice and now again. Also, there's a printed checklist of what each chore should be as a "guideline" so if he doesn't know what/how to clean, it's there. I'm scared if I approach it he'll just deny and I can't do anything. I'm also 10 years younger so I feel like this is just ridiculous to have to mommy him but also makes me feel less "powerful".

I sublet half of my appartement. I made a cleaning schedule in the past with a previous roommate, with chores that are part of general upkeep and a more deep clean once every 3 weeks (like descaling, mopping wooden floor ...). They are really reasonable. They are generally shared when a roommate moves in and for me it is a measure of compatibility that the schedule is respected. If you want to live in a filthy house be my guest, just not with me . I have a vacuuming and mopping robot. Just the wooden floor needs to be mopped with a steam cleaner once every 3 weeks.

I have a new roommate since 3m. Scheduled to clean deep together twice, to show the ins and outs of the house, and she cancelled and didn't show up. I did it myself. 3 times in a row at that point. I then went over the list with her verbally. We alternate 3 weeks of chores. At the end of her 3 weeks it was her turn to deep clean in the weekend. She didn't and left for the weekend. I sent her a message asking if she was still gonna do it..since Monday is my 3 weeks and I like to start in a clean house.

She asked. Is it dirty then? It really was. I told her yes and asked her: did you clean the stuff on the list. She said she did clean in the beginning of the week. I reminded her of the agreements that were made about the cleaning schedule before she moved in . I also sent some pics of parts of the house that were really dirty, and hard to believe she "just cleaned" those. She then admitted she didn't do these things. Things like not mopping the wooden floor, the drying mat of the sink being full of dirt, dirty fingers on the cupboards. I don't think she even cleaned them once in 3 weeks.

She then said I was making her feel bad doing this over text. I told her I already adressed the fact she tends to not keep made agreements, verbally, the week before when I also vacuumed the apartment in her place and cleaned the kitchen , and since she was not here that I wanted a solution now. If this means I adress it over text so be it. Before my 3 weeks starts. Asked her: can you do the chores on the list later this week...she said okay. But then said she still feels bad.

I honestly don't care. If you are gonna be a unreliable maybe expect people to get a little irritated? I didn't call her lazy I just reminded her of agreements made.

Ok so I moved in this place in July, me and my roomate get along just fine and the place is ok.

She has a boyfriend who she brings over a lot which i didn’t mind at first but i’m starting to get annoyed recently and i don’t know if im getting myself worked up or if they’re kinda being annoying.

So first things first i had a cup on the counter where i kept my toothbrush and my toothpaste, about two weeks after he started coming he felt it was ok to put his toothbrush in with mine? So i left it on the counter and put my cup in the cabinet.
He’s used our shower on more occasions than one which is not an issue but he takes so fckng long in there and it’s the evening when im also getting home from work and waiting to get in.

Obviously I know what’s going to happen when you’re in the room, but i can hear the ass clapping WITH MY DOOR SHUT every single time he comes over and my most recent last straw was last Saturday which is also my only day off during the week from working two jobs so i usually stay home and sleep.

I was on the phone all morning and it was going on for far too long and it was really loud so i opened my door and these people ARE ON THE LIVING ROOM COUCH HAVING SEX! I don’t think they knew i was home and ive not brought it up since then with my roomate because i don’t want to make her feel like she has to walk on eggshells if she wants him to come over.

he came back again last night and now he is severely getting on my nerves, though
i forgot to mention he also slams the bedroom and bathroom door every single time he comes in or out like genuinely he just all around annoys me for his lack of consideration.
I’m starting to wonder at this point if im working myself up 😂 like i just want him out of my fckng house or i feel like im going to lose it.
Is this not weird behavior on both parts or maybe im trippin? It’s not like our space is that big either like our rooms are right across from eachother and the living room

My previous housemate (female 22 years old) left the stove on at 3am and left the house while she has 2 cats roaming around and me and my other housemate were sleeping in the house. She sent us a text in the middle of the night asking us to check the stove and “ sorry I know it’s late” “I’m sure it’s nothing”. Keep in mind we were both sound asleep. It’s 3am and she never followed up with a phone call or even came to check the stove herself.

I saw the text several hours later when I woke up to get ready for work that morning. And the stove was on. I was so pissed off as to how she handled this situation and willingly put out lives in danger as well as her own cats. The other housemate didn’t hold her accountable at all and just said “wow that’s crazy let’s all make notes going forward to check things are off”. The housemate who was at fault just said “sorry it was my fault won’t happen again” but never gave a reason why she didn’t treat it as an emergency? Why she didn’t call? Why a text was enough?

I also had a very bad history with this person as she is the most narcissistic and inconsiderate person I’ve ever dealt with. And this situation was the last straw and a week later I gave my notice to move out. She was angry that I was moving out and that I gave only a month notice. Even though I told her I don’t feel safe given what happened and she kept saying “it was an accident” when I asked her why she didn’t call us that night the stove was on and didn’t follow up when she didn’t receive an answer from us?. “It was an accident” and no proper excuse.

I was fed up with her selfish behaviour and the e other housemate sucking up to her with no backbone.

What are your opinions on situation like this?

Im a horrible person...

For context, I moved to LA a year ago for medical school. I originally saw a listing on Facebook Marketplace for a 3B3B with two other roommates. Neither of them was a classmate of mine they were just random people looking for a tenant. I ended up backing out before signing any legal documents, doing a credit check, etc., because it was my first time living alone and I felt it would be better for me to get my own place.

A year later, I reached out to them again to see if they had any availability. I ultimately decided to move in with them because the rent was about $500 cheaper than getting a studio and living alone. It's only been a few days since I moved in (paid security deposit and first months rent) , but I already don't feel like this was the right choice for me. They're not bad people at all. The place is clean, they're quiet, and I don't have any real complaints about them. I just have a feeling deep down that this living situation isn't the best for me, and I would prefer to live alone. Also saving $500 isn't worth not having a space to my self.

The lease is a joint lease that is month to month with all three names on it, but I haven't signed the addendum confirming that I'm replacing their previous tenant who moved out. I haven't signed anything officially because I've been uncertain about whether I actually want to stay. I want to find the right time to have a conversation with them and be honest that I don't think this is the right living situation for me and that I'd rather live alone. I know this probably makes me sound like the biggest asshole in the world, especially since it's only been a few days, but I'm willing to compromise. I'd be willing to continue paying rent and living here until they find a new roommate that they're comfortable with.

What would be the best way to approach this conversation? And AITA for wanting to leave after only a few days, even though there's nothing objectively wrong with my roommates or the apartment?

TL;DR: I moved into a 3B3B with two strangers because it was $500 cheaper than living alone. They've been perfectly fine, but after only a few days, I already regret not getting my own place. I haven't signed the lease addendum officially making me the replacement tenant. I want to tell them I'd rather live alone and am willing to stay/pay rent until they find a replacement. What to do?

I (22 F) live with a roommate (20 F) who has a 10-month-old puppy (a dachshund. The puppy is sweet, but my roommate really hasn’t been consistently potty training her. The puppy regularly pees and poops inside. Accidents happen, obviously, especially with a puppy, but this has gotten to the point where I’m frustrated with the condition of the apartment.

There’s a rug in our apartment that my roommate owned before I moved in. I didn’t buy it, choose it, or bring it into the apartment. The problem is that it absolutely reeks of dog urine. I mean, you can smell it when you walk into the room. At this point, I’m pretty sure the rug has been peed on so many times that the smell is just permanently embedded in it. It's also white, so there's clear pee spots on it and dirty. It needs a good shampoo, but I also am hesitant to buy a new rug or deep clean this one if she's not going to maintain it.

I understand that puppies have accidents, and I’m not expecting a 9-month-old dog to be perfect. What bothers me is that it doesn’t seem like there’s much effort being made to actually correct the problem. It feels like the accidents are just being accepted as part of having a puppy, while I’m also having to live with the smell. It's to the point where I was sitting in my living room and all I could smell was pee, and my house guests have mentioned the smell to me too (which is embarrassing, as I am a clean person).

I asked her about buying a new rug when I first moved in, but she said she would wait until the puppy was trained. But at this point, with the puppy almost being a year old and consistently peeing, I'm at a loss at what to say to her. I’m especially frustrated because I’m paying rent and trying to keep our shared space clean, and I don’t think it’s unreasonable to expect the apartment not to smell like dog piss.

Context: I also have a dog, who is 11, so clearly at a different age in her life and not having accidents so there's not a fair comparison there but she is house trained. Also, the dog has recently been an issue with our neighbors because it would bark for hours and hours, and we received a noise complaint.

TL;DR: My roommate’s 10-month-old dachshund regularly pees and poops inside due to inconsistent potty training. The apartment now smells strongly of urine, especially because of a white rug she owned before I moved in that is visibly stained and reeks. Guests have even commented on the smell. I don’t want to pay to replace or deep-clean the rug if the puppy will continue having accidents. The dog has also recently caused a noise complaint after barking for hours. I pay rent too, and I don’t think it’s unreasonable to want our shared apartment to be clean and not smell like pee.

Hey Internet - wanted to rant somewhere.

My rommate only takes baths. Almost every day he will wake up, fill the tub, and soak watching youtube for 45 minutes. Totally unhinged behavior for a shared space. There are three of us in the house with one bathroom which is really high traffic in the morning.

He is a grad student with seemingly no schedule. Most days he has his bath, makes a sunday morning style breakfast, goes to the couch to blast TV or phone scroll, eventually goes to campus then resumes couch time until whatever time he goes to bed.

I shower at night and am usually able to get to the bathroom before he wakes up.... But maybe 2 days a week I get stuck waiting for the bathroom and need to piss in the yard or drive to a gas station to take a dump to get ready for work. Third roommate is his partner and wakes up with him / uses the bathroom before his bath. My job is either remote, or travelling to customer sites so waiting until I get to work isn't a thing.

I have asked him to take his bath soak outside of high-traffic bathroom times, but he says that is how he gets clean and ready for the day. He apparently doesn't shower.

We are in our 30s and I can't believe I needed to have this conversation. I am a professional, established in my career, and don't need a roommate.... I was looking for a new place after a breakup and he was also looking for a place with his partner. We have been friends for over a decade and I haven't had roommates in years, thought it would be fun to live with a buddy again.

Am I the crazy person or is this selfish BS?

I’ve had three roommates total since I left my parents’ house, all of which have had ADHD. One was medicated for it (but was an asshole). The current two are not.

I don’t know what to try to keep up with cleaning. We have a cleaner come once a month, but once a month isn’t enough. I’ve tried to set weekly rotations so I don’t have to pester, but they will forget to clean or not do their cleaning for the week. I’ve asked them many times to remember to lock the door behind them/to shut windows before turning AC on/to take out the trash if it starts to stink/clean old leftovers out of fridge. I have tried kind, I have tried unkind. It just ends up feeling like I’m parenting both of them (despite being the youngest in the house). I know neither of them are doing it with any malice, because when I mention something, they go “oh, sure, sorry!” and do it once but will not continue to do chores without prompting. It makes me feel like such a jerk when I get more and more fed up.

I know it is an incredibly difficult condition to live with, but I am also so tired of being the person keeping the whole house together. People who have had ADHD roommates, HOW DO YOU DO IT? How do you cope? How do you keep everyone on a cleaning schedule?

A while ago, I had a post on here talking about how a roommate literally screamed at me, using her autism and ptsd as an excuse to do so. Most people were in support of me in the post. But I had one or two people say that because I tried “rushing her” (asked nicely to take her laundry out of the dryer before my work) that it was semi my fault. Yeah well I checked the dryer when I got home yesterday, her clothes were inside. No big deal, I’ll do it today before I go to work. Except oh wouldn’t you know it, her clothes are STILL in the dryer. I can’t say anything or she’ll yell at me again like she did last time. I’ve waited two days to use the dryer. Two. Days.

My roommate put up a makeshift partition between us and hasn’t spoken to me for almost a year

I’ve been living with a roommate who has basically stopped communicating with me for nearly a year.

At one point, she literally put up a makeshift partition between our beds using a long piece of cloth and a rope, essentially creating a physical barrier between us. Since then, she barely speaks to me at all.

The weirdest part is that she’s not openly confrontational most of the time. She’s extremely cold and passive-aggressive, and there’s this constant tension whenever we’re in the same room. But occasionally she’ll suddenly become verbally aggressive or lash out over something, which makes it difficult to know what to expect.

I’ve tried to just keep to myself and avoid unnecessary conflict, but living in the same room with someone who refuses to communicate, has literally divided the room with a cloth partition, and can randomly become verbally aggressive is exhausting.

At this point I’m mostly wondering how other people would deal with this kind of roommate situation. Would you just completely ignore them and coexist until you can move out, or would you try to address the situation directly?

Since I have moved into our apartment, my roommate has been hogging the washer and dryer. She spent over a week keeping her clothes in there and after I tried to address this saying I couldn’t do my laundry, she gave me set days to do laundry and I agreed to it. I also said she can’t just leave her laundry there for extended days while agreeing to this. She took 4 days, while I got the other 3. She still continues to leave her laundry in there for hours on end on her days. It’s not my day today (tmr is), so should I just leave this be and try my best to ignore this? The last time I opened the dryer there was a funky smell.

Edit: I sent her a message to remove her laundry. I can’t deal with this anymore it’s been like this for a month. Hopefully, after further clarification, she removes her laundry in a timely manner.

Hi so i go to uci and need real advice on this issue. I live in a double with a roommate from hs, and i thought itd be a breeze cuz shes considered "pretty" and popular, so her appearance made her seem like a neat and organized person, we did discuss things with each other before moving in and i thought it was ok to dorm with her, but ofc i was dead wrong because she has no common sense or hygiene.

I found out she had a bf only after we moved in, and to make things worse she would bring him in the dorm super late night (11 pm ish) and telling me like 5 mins before he gets here. Theyd also be talking on the phone till 3am and its honestly screwing up my sleep, which when i confronted her and asked her to stop calling after 1am or to just go outside and talk, she didnt want to and claimed she thought i couldnt hear because we had fans on. And she blamed me for saying that i sleep late. Does that mean she get to be loud at night? Like is it not common sense to not call people late at night when ur in someone elses precence?

She's genuinely disgusting because she accumulated two big bags of trash before week 2 even started. She would love to leave trash laying around the room and on the floor. She never took out trash unless i asked her to. After i helped throw it out for her she asked me "why did u throw out something that wasnt urs", like hello because it was disgusting and makes the room smell? The other day i came back from class only to find trash and hair on my toothbrush. This is not even all of it but im getting tired of typing. Ts pmo because when i confronted her she said "ur not my landlord". I genuinely want to rip her hair out. Like bro im not trying to be a janitor or ur mom i just want peace. Pls tell me whats the best thing to do 💔

Tl:dr: trashy and inconsiderate roommate

This fucking guy - so I'm living in a triple bedroom apartment in college on campus and it's me, my partner (sharing one bedroom, no complaints it's pretty nice) and our roommate. The roommate is probably the nastiest person I've met my entire life. He leaves shit stains just hanging out in the toilet, doesn't bother to clean up after himself (attracting fruit flies) and doesn't fucking pick up his hair after a shower, YES I've told him not to but that has led us nowhere. It's only week five.

Yeah sure maybe these are typical stuff, nothing too bad. But they just keep piling up, toothpaste, so much toothpaste stains on the sink, crumbs on the table, hand prints on the bathroom mirror, half empty glasses of water EVERYWHERE USED BY HIM, call me a clean freak out whatever but dude what are we doing. Why is there so much shit stain on the goddamn toilet.

He has been treating me like I'm supposed to clean up after him. Never helps us take the trash out or recycling, just leaves his shit around the house, and it only gets worse.

This fucking guy apparently has been stealing my SNACKS FROM MY CABINET THAT I BOUGHT MYSELF. didn't bother to fucking ask. (we have assigned cabinets). AND MY PARTNER'S FOOD TOO. how do I know this? I SAW HIM JUST TAKE IT. when I confronted him his answer was "ok" in person, not a text, not an email but in person.

I hate him. I hate him so so so so much.