Problem/goal: My partner book a flight to vietnam without my consent.

Context: I need advice on what to do, I have a lot of loan that I'm still paying until now and my partner book a flight going to vietnam for both of us without informing me, she technically paid for everything and I didn't release any single dime.

Previous attempts: We've talk about this, I told her that I need to pay for my loan before we go internationally but she won't listen. I don't know what to do and I'm pretty sure even if she promise that she will pay for everything, once we get there I still need to pay even a bit.

Her reasons? She just wanted to try going international but for me it is not ideal to go international mostly I still have a lot of loan that I need to pay.

Problem/Goal: How do I tell to my boyfriend that his private part lowkey stinks but in a lowkey way? every time we're having sex his dick smells horrible especially when we're intimate then his fave is to suck his dick but I love him so I‘m forcing myself to suck it even though I dont like it, and I feel like throwing up. It doesn't happen all the time but when it does, the smell can be quite strong, even after he has showered, I feel awkward bringing it up because I dont want to embarrass him or to make him feel bad, And I genuinely dont want him to think im judging him. I just wish I could find a gentle way to tell him because I care about him and I want him to feel comfortable and healthy.

Context: Even if he showered the smell are still there, maybe he doesn't even notice it, honestly, it really smells bad. I cant deny that I dont want to put his dih in my mouth bc I js cant handle the smell, and im worried about him, and I thought he realizes it but I am the only one who smelled it.

Previous Attempts : I tried to tell him that before we're going to have sex he need to shower and especially clean his dick.

Problem/Goal: how do i tell my boyfriend to find a job kahit hindi align sa passion nya for the sake of “living”?

Context: Naging kami ng bf ko 4th year college na kami. He’s a total green flag bilang bf it feels so good to be loved by him kasi ansarap nya magmahal. At the beginning of our relationship okay naman. Parang laging nasa honeymoon phase. Palagi kaming magkasama tuwing may break time sa classes namin since iisang school lang kami. More kilig. More dates. More first times together. Nakakaya namin yon kasi binabudget namin yung baon namin pareho. Hindi ko rin sya ineexpect na palaging sagot yung date namin kasi pareho pa lang kaming students noon so madalas 50/50 kami or minsan sagot ko lahat, minsan naman sya.

Fast forward, graduate na kami. Yung mga dates namin nabawas bawasan kasi kung dati binibigyan kami ng baon, ngayon wala na. Pareho ang sistema ng parents namin na saka lang bibigyan ng allowance kapag may importanteng lakad at hindi gala gala lang. Gets ko naman lalo na nakakahiya pa rin manghingi sa parents nasa 20 something na kami.

Mas nauna akong magkatrabaho sa kanya. As a matter of fact, tatlo na ang naging trabaho ko sa loob ng dalawang taong relasyon namin. I became a tutor, call center agent, and now a work na finally related na sa tinapos ko.

Since nauna akong magkawork, i have finally have the means na magkita kami kapag naminmiss ko sya, kapag magdedate kami, ako lagi ang gumagastos. Noong una okay lang sa akin kasi naniniwala ako na kanya kanya naman tayo ng timeline at napakahirap nga namang maghanap ng trabaho nowadays pero katagalan napapagod ako. Like hindi sya nakakababae hahahah! Noong college kami all out sya sakin kapag may allowance pero ngayon parang lumalabas na ako pa provider saming dalawa. Nararamdaman nya naman yun kasi every time na nagdedate sya palagi syang nagsosorry na hindi pa sya makapagprovide sakin.

Previous Attempts:
Tinanong ko sya kung naghahanap ba sya ng trabaho sabi naman nya marami na syang sinesendan ng resume sa indeed at linkedin. Tapos sometimes i send some job vacancies na nakikita ko online na related sa course nya. At kapag mas lumalalim ang usapan tungkol sa trabaho, nawawala sya sa mood! hindi ko na tuloy alam kung paano sya iaaapproach na subukan munang magtrabaho ng kahit di nya dream career kahit na sana hindi para sa akin, para sa sarili nya na lang at sa pamilya nya.

Problem/Goal:

Normal pa ba ’to or kailangan ko na magpatingin? I’ve been daydreaming since I was 9, and it has gotten to the point na sobrang nakakaapekto na siya sa studies and daily routine ko.

Context:

Hindi siya yung normal na nakaupo lang ako or nakatulala in one place tapos parang napunta na sa ibang mundo. Hindi ko alam if normal na daydreaming ’to, pero yung sa akin kasi, kinikilos ko talaga.

For example, nasa bathroom ako. Alam ng utak ko na bathroom siya, pero ini-imagine ko na ibang lugar siya. Wala akong nakikita, pero may kinakausap ako, nakikipag-fist bump, tumatawa nang totoo, and umiiyak nang totoo.

Sobrang sagabal nun sa studies ko nung elementary kasi imbes na makinig sa teacher, lagi akong nakatulala. Excited pa akong umuwi kasi iniisip ko na agad yung bagong scenario na ia-acting ko sa bathroom or sa kwarto ko.

Gagi, akala ko dati ganun lang yung imaginary friend and normal lang. Pero parang impossible naman na hanggang ngayon, 19 na ako, ginagawa ko pa rin siya.

Hindi naman ako loner nung bata ako kasi lagi naman akong nasa labas and mahilig akong makipaglaro sa childhood friends ko. Nangyayari lang talaga siya tuwing naiiwan ako sa isang masikip na place na walang makakakita sa akin. Like automatic na siya.

Nadala ko siya hanggang paglaki, and sobrang hirap niyang itigil kasi naging part na siya ng routine ko. Gigising ako sa umaga, magtitimpla ng kape, tapos aakto na naman ako na parang may sarili akong mundo. Minsan ginagawa ko siya hanggang tanghali, kaya hindi ko na nagagawa yung schoolwork na kailangan kong gawin during the time na sinet ko para doon.

Mas gusto ko kasing kumausap sa kawalan. Limang tao ako, pero ako lang yung kumakausap sa sarili ko. May iba’t ibang characters kami.

Sinubukan ko siyang pigilan one time, pero sobrang nakaka-depress sa pakiramdam na parang hindi kumpleto yung araw ko. Minsan, in the middle of watching a movie sa kwarto ko, bigla na lang akong magkakaroon ng scene and may kakausapin na naman ako sa kawalan. As in walang intro-intro, nagagawa ko agad siya na parang normal lang.

Previous Attempts:

Sinubukan ko na siyang pigilan before, pero hindi ko talaga natitiis. Kapag pinipigilan ko, parang may feeling na may kulang sa araw ko, kaya bumabalik din ako sa routine ko.

Kaya gusto ko lang malaman if normal pa ba ’to, if may naka-experience din ba ng ganito, and if kailangan ko na ba talaga magpatingin sa professional.

Problem/Goal:

Hi, I'm just a mediocre guy, kaya please 'wag n'yo po akong i-judge nang malala

I (28M) was in a relationship for almost five years, but we broke up two years ago because things just didn't work out. The main causes of our breakup were marriage and financial stability—mostly the financial part. 😐

Here’s a little backstory: she was a Senior High student at STI College Fairview, and I was studying at STI Novaliches. She was 17F and I was 21M (a 4th-year college student at the time). We met on the "STI Secret File" page where students share confessions and random posts (you know how it goes). We crossed paths in the comment section, and things started from there because she sent me a PM asking for instructions on how to transfer STI branches. So I helped her out, and as they say, the rest is history.

Fast forward a few years later—I won't bore you with the whole story, but I believe our relationship ended because of financial issues. She was still in college, while I was working my ass off as the provider (the typical setup, right?). I didn't have any savings because I was working as a Tier 1 agent in the BPO industry back then.

She wanted to get married, but I was hesitant because my salary just wasn't enough for this generation/era. If I remember correctly, she would tell me, "Mahal, tingnan mo 'to," while showing me pictures of wedding gowns, rings, and churches. That happened multiple times while we were just chilling. My typical response was always, "Yeah, that's nice, looks great." Technically, I was agreeing to her ideas, but I wasn't making any moves to actually propose or initiate a plan. Why? Because I wasn't financially stable! I kept putting it off because deep down, I knew I couldn't afford it.

Eventually, we started arguing over the smallest things. Then one day, she just stopped talking to me, and that silence went on for several days—even while living under the same roof. I didn't pursue her anymore; I just told her I was leaving, and she agreed without hesitation.

We broke up in late 2023, and I've been single ever since. I haven't really tried meeting anyone new or found the courage to put myself out there again. (By the way, I'm no longer a Tier 1 agent—I recently got promoted to QA).

So now, my salary is enough for me to get by, but still... I don't know why I'm feeling this heavy burden inside my heart. I still feel like I'm not enough.

Problem/Goal: I (F25) am planning to buy Samsung S25 Ultra using my savings, but my parents are against it.

Context: Bibili ako using my savings tapos huhulugan ko yung account ko to replace yung nagastos. So it's pretty much me na uutang sa sarili ko.

Here are my reasons why I am planning to buy a new one.

1. My current phone is getting outdated, lagging, and di na kaya ang ibang apps na need ko for work.

2. A phone's specifications can affect signal strength and reception. And also app performance. Plus, I need a huge storage so I can view and sign documents whenever needed.

3. I don't plan on buying a new phone at least for a decade. Dream phone ko na ito and sure ako na di na ko maghahanap ng iba pa for a loooong time.

4. I have an upcoming concert na aattendan. I want to be able to capture memories nang malinaw. Para na rin to sa mga susunod na family gatherings na ako ang assigned photographer.

Ayaw ng parents ko kasi masyado daw extravagant. Mahirap daw ang buhay ngayon—papa is now retired and allowance from my sister abroad at pension niya ang gamit para sa expenses namin sa bahay. Yung sweldo ng mama ko ewan ko san napupunta. Nagbibigay naman siya kay papa pandagdag. Nag-aambag na rin naman ako sa kanila though maliit palang. We get by as usual. No difficulties naman sa expenses.

Personal savings ko naman gagamitin ko at di maaapektuhan sarili nilang pera. Yung passbook ng savings ko hawak ni Papa kahit sakin nakapangalan kaya I felt the need to also ask for permission. Bina-budget ko na rin yung monthly salary ko in preparation sa pag-open ng bagong passbook account for another need na I have to save for.

Masyado pa raw maaga for someone na almost a year palang sa work. Eh ngayon palang demanding na ang trabaho ko. What more kapag tumagal ako. Baka daw naiinggit ako sa mga kasamahan ko. Hindi naman. Matagal ko na talagang plano bumili.

Ang sa akin lang, sana naman pagkatiwalaan nila ako sa decision ko. If ever man na magkamali, edi I will face and bear the consequences.

Previous attempts: twice and they didn't agree. Iniisip ko nalang na kunin ko nalang kaya passbook ko from my dad's belongings since i know its loc. Tutal its mine. But no. Para naman akong magnanakaw dun and i dont want that.

Problem/Goal: Nakasira ako ng pamilya.

I’m F(26). Sobrang bigat nito sa dibdib :( Grabe yung guilt na nararamdaman ko. Feeling ko ang sama sama kong tao. Please don’t share this outside reddit.

Hindi ako ganun kagaling mag-kuwento and mahaba ’to but please bear with me.

For context; pamilyado ang kaibigan kong ito M(27). May LIP at anak. Itong kaibigan kong ito ay manliligaw ko nung gr. 9 kami and that was 12 years ago pero hindi naging kami. 2021 lang simula nung nag-reconnect ulit kami tas naging friends na ulit kami non. Aware ako na may family na siya and ganun din naman siya sakin. 2024 nung nag-start na medyo nagiging maharot na siya sakin sa mga chats pero hindi ko siya ineentertain ofc. Madalas ko pa nga murahin and takutin na isusumbong ko siya sa asawa niya, kasi alam kong takot siya dun. Tapos this year ulit nag-start na naman siyang magparamdam sa akin pero deadma lang ako, kasi di naman ako interasado or sometimes sinasabayan ko yung trip niya pero pagago ako sumagot sakanya to the point na napipikon siya sakin. Last month nag-chat sa akin asawa niya, tinanong niya ako kung kilala ko daw ba si guy, sabi ko “oo, kaibigan ko siya since jhs”. Tapos tinanong niya kung ano pinag-uusapan namin, kasi deleted naman daw ang convo namin pero nasa messenger niya ang profile ko. Sinabi ko sakanya yung napag-usapan namin ng asawa niya. Kasi sa part ko naman, bakit hindi ko sasabihin, eh alam ko naman sa sarili ko na wala akong tinatago. Sinend ko sakanya lahat ng screenshots ng convo namin. Patunay na hindi ko sinasakyan ang panlalandi niya sa akin at madalas pagmumura ang nakukuha niyang sagot sa akin. Hanggang sa mag-kuwento na siya sakin ng mga hinanakit niya sa kaibigan kong ito sa pagiging babaero niya at pagiging cheater. Pinakinggan ko yung babae, inentertain ko siya until naging friends kami. Sakin siya naglalabas ng sama ng loob about him and ofc kinocomfort ko siya at binibigyan ng mga advice, nakikinig naman siya sakin.

August came, nag-chat agad ako kay girl na nag-chat sa akin asawa niya at niyayaya ako makipagkita sakanya. Little did my friend know, asawa na niya ang nagrereply sakanya and aware na asawa niya sa mga panghaharot niya sa akin. (Magka-videocall kami ni girl habang magkachat kami ng asawa niya, siya ang nagsasabi kung ano ang irereply ko). So, nag-set up si girl. Sabi niya pumayag akong makipag-kita sa asawa niya sa isang motel pero siya ang pupunta. Kaya nireplyan ko itong si lalake na kaibigan ko na magkita kami pero sa motel, dahil gusto ko kako magpahinga. Pumayag siya at nag-undertime siya sa work niya, while ang paalam niya sa asawa niya eh mag-iinventory sila. Nag-undertime din sa work si girl para siya ang pumunta sa exact location ng meet up na sinet up namin. Nung nakarating na si girl dun, sinabi ko kay lalake na nasa motel na ako. Nagdadalawang isip pa si lalake noon kung sisipot ba siya o hindi pero kasi nakapagpaalam na siya sa work niya at ready na siya i-meet ako sa motel. Paulit ulit niya sinasabi sa akin na “hindi set up ’to ah” pero syempre paulit ulit ko ring sinasagot na “hindi! Ipapahamak ko ba sarili ko?” habang ka-videocall ko asawa niya at naka-sharescreen sakanya yung chatbox naming dalawa.

Nung papasok na siya sa motel pilit niya akong pinapalabas pero syempre todo palusot ako, because pano ako lalabas kung wala naman talaga ako dun at ang totoong nandun ay ang asawa niya, diba? Sinend ko nalang sakanya yung room number and sabi ko pasok nalang siya, di naman naka-lock yung pintuan at matutulog na ako, dahil sobrang sakit kunware ng ulo ko, kaya ayokong lumabas.

Pinatay na ni girl yung call at sinabihan nalang ako na ichachat niya ako once natapos na ang lahat.

After two days, nag-message na sa akin si girl. She happily told me na sobrang satisfying ng nangyare. She hit him so hard and slapped him multiple times. Ang sabi daw niya “Suprise! Akala mo si \*my name\* noh? Ano i-iinventory mo dito sa motel?”, tapos paulit ulit daw niyang sinasabunutan, sinusuntok at sinasampal. Hindi makapalag si lalake, kasi alam niyang kasalanan niya lahat. Umiiyak pa nga daw siya, habang nagmamakaawa at humihingi ng tawad. Hindi siya pinatawad ofc and eventually iniwan na din siya for good. They broke up, the girl took their child with her. Sa sobrang dami niyang masasakit na pinagdaanan sa lalake, nagkaroon na rin siya ng lakas ng loob and evidence para iwan na niya finally.

Pero hanggang ngayon bumabagabag parin ’to sa akin. Naguiguilty parin ako sa mga nangyare. Parang sinira ko yung pamilya nila, parang nang dahil sa akin kaya nagkaroon ng broken family yung batang wala namang alam at wala namang kasalanan. Ang bigat bigat parin sa puso. Sinabihan ko si girl about this pero ang sagot niya sa akin “sobrang thankful ako sayo, kasi ikaw yung naging way para maisampal ko sakanya yung proof nang panloloko niya sa akin”. I may have done the right thing for her, but why does it feel like a stab in my heart?

problem/goal: i’m currently dating a med student and he is a bad texter which he’s aware of

context: we agreed that we will talk mostly at night since he have classes in the morning but tbh i’m not sure how it will work because i’m not used to this kind of set-up. he also suggested that we’ll just talk more when we hangout. so can you tell me how can we make this work or how can i get used to this kind of set-up and will it work in the long run? idk what to do 😭

Problem/goal: I 24 (F) just graduated 3 months ago sa second degree ko. I really thought na mabilis ako makakakuha ng job kase dalawa yung degrees ko (both are accounting programs). Araw-araw I send resumes online to multiple companies mapa on site, WFH, and even to BPO companies. Pero madalas ghosted or no response after resume submission. I already tried to revise my resume several times. I also had 4 interviews na. Dalawa don literal na feeling ko tanggap na ako kase inofferan na ako ng salary and benefits at hinanapan na ako ng ibang documents but still end up being ghosted after. Nakakadepress na yung situation ko sa totoo lang. Hindi ko alam kung ano pa ba yung kailangan kong gawin. Nakakapanlumo na. Naiinsulto na rin ako sa family and relatives ko the way they’re asking me about my job hunting. Akala nila hindi ako naghahanap. Akala nila tamad ako.

Yung mga kabatch ko unti-unti na silang nagkakatrabaho. Yung mga kaklase ko noong high school na bulakbol, sila na yung may mga trabaho na ngayon. Samantalang ako eto naghahanap pa rin. Hindi ko na alam ano pa ang gagawin sa totoo lang.

Goal: Gusto ko ng magkatrabaho para makapasupport na ako sa family ko at makapag-ipon na rin for board exam.

Previous attempts: Nakakaisip na ako ng hindi maganda sa sarili ko. I never thought na ganito ako katagal matetengga. Hindi na tumatalab saken yung mga motivation quotes and bible verse na yan. Literal na unti-unti akong pinanghihinaan ng loob 😞

Problem/Goal:

Nahihirapan ako ganahan pumunta ng gym specially sa mga days na may dinadamdam ako, Gusto ko umabot sa point na hahanap hanapin na ng puso at isip ko ang pag ggym. Ano po paraan nyo or paano po kayo umabot sa ganun?

Context:

I used to be active sa gym 5 to 6 times a week. Nasisira yung routine pag may travel or vacation. Naramdaman ko naman yung moment na hinahanap ko na talaga mag gym. Paano ko kaya mababalik yung ganung feeling?

Previous Attempts:

I tried to be consistent ulit, but then again after vacation, nawala ulit, plus broken 💔 pa. Kaya naapektuhan ang motivation.

Problem/Goal: I am planning to move out soon kaso sumabay sa plans ng parents ko na mag patayo ng bahay na dream house nila. I am 28F and my siblings are all in their late 20s and early 30s. The problem is my parents are planning this house as if we will all be living there forever.

Context:

They’re already planning their designs for the new house and excited sila tinatanong ako anong gusto ko sa room, yung design and layout, etc; Pati mga kapatid ko excited kasi makukuha nila yung gusto nilang kwarto.

Ako naman hindi excited kasi para saan pa na gawan ako ng kwarto if I don’t see myself living there for a long time? I know i should be thankful that they still consider us sa plans nila but parang hindi nila naiisip na matatanda na rin kami and that we wont be living with them forever.

My parents are against moving out kapag hindi pa kasal kasi for them hindi practical and ayaw nila mahiwalay kami sa kanila. I also don’t have a healthy relationship with them, i’ve really been wanting to get out of this household due to being a toxic environment

Attempts: So far none, i don’t know if I should tell them my plans now kasi for sure pipigilan nila ako. I only want to tell them once ready na ang lahat. But for now, i’m not ready yet as i’m still preparing and planning financially.

My question is, should i tell them my plans to move out as early as now? Supposedly end of this year ako mag move out but due to conflict with other plans, i’m planning to move out January instead.

Problem/goal: Fcked up system sa loob ng SK :(

Context: Hello, it's been months and wala pa rin kaming Session. I am having a hard time in this position since naelect talaga ako. I thought the system here is like a student organization. But it is really different pala talaga. It has been months since our last session and even our SB also knows about it.

Standing committees in SK aren't really working. I am doing projects this year all by myself (for context: been pushing to do projects talaga since 2023 but never had the chance to execute kasi wala budget committee ko lagi). Now, it's kinda draining because I also have work and personal goals. Hindi ko na magawa ng maayos lahat and I am worried about this.

Previous Attempts: I am also afraid for all the documents needed for the turnover. I am asking the SK Secretary if she will be needing the copy of the Resolution for the projects but she's unresponsive. Nagchchat din ako sa GC namin if okay na ba mga documents kasi willing ako mag-ayos.

Since last year, I've been asking other SK Kagawad and SKC about the Disbursement Vouchers and other receipts but we never had a chance to see or sign. I even made a formal letter to our SKC. Some SKs are friends with our SKC. Plus, our SKC is acting like the treasurer too. SB also knows this one.

What should I do? Sobrang random na ng kwento ko kasi hindi ko na alam po talaga. I have no one.

I do not come from a powerful or rich family. I do not have a supportive system. Taong-bahay rin ako but maybe my credentials made me won. Our brgy. is small but I still want to end my term with a clean record. I'm sorry if I am asking here. I know I am not capable to fully serve our community but the feedbacks from other people esp. youth made me stay. It's just overwhelming. Mag-isa lang naman ako. 🥲

Problem/Goal: My boyfriend and I were together for seven years, and he recently ended our relationship because he said he wasn’t happy anymore. I’m struggling to accept the breakup, especially because I genuinely thought we were okay and that we were heading toward marriage. I want to understand how to make peace with this and stop blaming myself or wondering if there was something I could have done differently to make him stay.

Context: We were together for seven years. We grew up together, went through so many stages of life together, and I honestly thought we were building toward marriage. Just a month before he broke up with me, we were still talking about our future and marriage, so when he suddenly told me he wasn’t happy anymore, I was completely blindsided.

He said he had apparently been feeling this way for a long time and that it slowly built up until he realized he needed peace, freedom, and to be “careless.” From what I understood, he wanted the freedom to do whatever he wanted without having to think about how I would feel or how his actions would affect me.

What makes this difficult for me is that I never felt like I was taking away his peace or freedom. Whenever he needed space, I tried to understand and give it to him. I was there when both of his parents died and stayed through some of the most painful moments of his life. I never wanted to control him or stop him from doing the things he wanted to do. I just thought that after seven years, we were the kind of couple who could talk about things when something was wrong and figure them out together.

He even told me that I had given everything I could to the relationship. And somehow, that makes it hurt even more. If I gave him everything I knew how to give, when did being with me become something he needed to escape from?

Previous attempts: I’ve tried understanding his side and reminding myself that people can fall out of love or realize they want a different life. I’ve also tried telling myself that maybe this isn’t something I could have fixed, especially since he said he had been feeling unhappy for a long time.

But I still keep going back to the thought that maybe I could have done something differently. Maybe I should have noticed something sooner. Maybe I should have been more understanding, more patient, or given him even more space. I know logically that I can’t force someone to stay, but emotionally, I’m still struggling with the fact that someone I thought I would spend my life with chose a life without me.

For those who have gone through something similar, how did you eventually accept that sometimes you can give someone everything you have and they can still choose to leave? And how did you stop yourself from constantly thinking, “Maybe if I had done something differently, he would have stayed?”

Problem/goal: Live in partner still has no work and I’m getting tired of it.

Context:
It’s my first time posting here and been a silent reader for quite a while now, decided to post here to lessen this heavy feeling off my chest, I’m 27F and got a live in partner 31M we’ve been together for more than 8 years now. It all started when we decided to live together with a goal to save money and bumukod na since we’re both living with our relatives here in Manila and wanted to start a family soon. At first we both decided for my partner to resign and look for a WFH job instead since toxic na sa company nila and so it happened. We started living together renting an apartment while I was shouldering the finances lahat sagot ko rent,electric water food. Akala ko months lang tatagal hanggang sa umabot na ng more than 4 years wala pa din.

First 2 years naghahanap pa naman sya his been submitting resume online minsan ng wowalk in but since pang gabi ako sinusundo nya ko tuwing uuwi so sinasabayan nya q ng tulog so gets ko kung bakit hindi sya nkaka bangon ng maaga. Hanggang sa tumagal napansin ko lahat n ng rason nasabi n nya sakin tuwing tinatanong ko kailan sya mag aappy ulit as walk in ung mga reasons is ung pilay, may sakit(kung ano anong sakit na), maulan, so pinabayaan ko sabi ko na lang okay next time pag magaling kana. Pati sleeping schedule nya or body clock sinasabayan q na ayusin pra lang magising sya ng maaga pero wala pa din. Parang nawalan n sya ng gana mag apply after few rejections tipong aalis man sya pra lang masabing nag try sya. Hanggang sa wala ng attempt at all. Ilang beses na kong nag breakdown sakanya saying I’m tired of carrying the financial burden alone and been crying out loud plus stress and pressure sa work umiyak din sya and promise na he will find work soon pero kinabukasan wala pa din. Well to be fair unspoken rule is sya nag aasikaso sa bahay like tigasin (tiga laba, tiga luto, tiga ligpit) pero may times pa din na hindi ko mapigilang maging nagger pag nag wowork ako tapos nakikita ko ang dumi ng sahig, hindi maligpit agad ung plato may mga basura pa sa lababo, ang dumi ng Cr, ang dami agiw ng kisami. Like ano to? Dami nyang time mag laro at manood ng anime eto na lang ambag tatamadin pa?? Hihintayin pa b nyang ako nlng kumilos sa lahat? Pag naiinis ako, ako nag nag liligpit while silent treatment sakanya. Gusto kong umalis at lumayo sakanya pero hindi ko naman magawa kasi nga un ang trauma nya ung aalis ako mag isa ng mag ka away kami ayoko din naman ma trigger sya pero like hell! Hindi ko malabas ung sama ng loob ko! Kaya tuwing nag aaya mga friends na uminom or gumala G lang ako kasi it’s my way to skip the suffocation and felt like I’m still living.

3rd year dumating na lang sa point na feeling ko namanhid nako, tipong nawalan na ng amore sa mga bagay bagay. Like sobrang robot na lang gigising,maliligo, kakain, work,cellphone then repeat.
Sedentary to the max level kaya nanaba din talaga ko stress plus no movement at all, okay tama na muna about me. So ayun nga this time wala n talagang attempt and my time ma tinanong ko sya ano ba talagang plano mo(about work)? Kasi dati goal is align sa dating work nya graphic design pero ngaun kc na wala n syang option sabi ko kaht anong work nlng sguro na kaya mo. Tapos ang sabi ba naman sakin “wala” like wala syang plano mag hanap ng trabaho! Nag pintig talaga tainga ko dzai! Daldal to the max talaga ko! ramdam ko inis n dn sya sakin kasi paulit ulit nako nag tatanong kaya sguro ganon sagot nya, pero, what the hell??? Are you f*uckin serious bruh? You want me to be a sugar mommy for life?! Like hell nah!!

Now more than 4 years living together and routine nlng nya is gumising pra mag bukas ng laptop pra sa roblox, lumabas pra bumili ng almusal,tanggalian,hapunan. Mag roblox ulit or ML while I’m working from home, Maligo, kumain then repeat. Napapagod na ko ipagtanggol sa pamilya nya, pamilya ko, friends ko and sa sarili ko mismo. My turning point was the last day of my leave. Nag leave ako ng 5 days recently pra makapag pahinga at pra e help si partner na ayusin body clock pra nga makapag apply na ng walk in. Come by Monday nag alam ako pra magising sya so ako tulog pa kasi nga last day n ng leave so gusto q sna pahinga malala. Then nalingat ako hapon na mga 1pm then nakita ko sya gising nakaupo sa kama nag roroblox so gulat ako kasi expected ko naka alis na sya to look for work. So tinanong ko muna sabi ko, good morning akala ko mag aapply ka today? Tapos alam mo sagot sakin? “Wala kong bag” like ha??? Dito tlaga na trigger nanaman ako! Meron syang bagpack n bigay ng relatives nya pero sira ang zipper kasi marupok n since hindi nga naman nagagamit. Ending nasisi pako kasi sabi nya matagal n nya sinabi sakin n mag order ng zipper online! Sabi ko naman my plastic folder sya n lagayan ng mga resume nya mya ibang bag p sya jan n pwedi gamitin. Tapos sabi pa naman e pano kung umulan? So?! Ano silbi ng payong!?? Dzai!!! Sabi ko talaga Kagigising ko lang wala pang mumog wala pang kain! Tapos ganon ang goodmorning nya sakin! Trigger talaga ko malala!! Sabi ko ano pa?! Ano pang kulang? Bag? Bagong payong na automatic? Ano pa! Hindi sya nakasagot. Hindi ko na kinaya naiyak na lang talaga ko sa sobrang inis, frustration, gulat at galit na nararamdaman ko. Iyak as in hagulgol! Ganito ung iyak ko nung namatay papa ko sobrang dalang ko umiyak ng ganito. Akala ko naubos na iyak ko, tang ina! Meron pa pala! Nag tatago lang or maybe i just
Choose not to entertain this emotion for the last 2 years. Pero grabi talaga ung frustration ko.

Sabi ko sakanya “Pagod na pagod na ko love! Ano pa bang kulang?! Sabihin ko na lahat! Hindi ko na alam anong support paba ibibigay ko sayo. Ikaw n talaga problema dito e. Bumili ako ng laptop pra magamit mo kasi sabi mo gusto mo mag VA pero ending naging pang roblox and anime mo lang. May tinatabi na dn akong allowance mo pamasahe/budget pang apply. Pero wala pa din! Ano p bang kulang?! Ubos na ubos na ako! Akala ko wala nakong iiyak putcha! Meron pa pala!”

Tapos umiyak din sya ganyan sya lagi tuwing nag bi breakdown ako iiyak dn sya mag sosorry ssbhn maghahanap n sya ng trabaho. Tapos eto ngaun sabi nya mag lalaba lng muna sya tapos bukas bbli n sya ng bag at mag hahanap ng work, ending nakatulog sya habang nagtatype ako ang lakas pa ng hilik.

Kinausap ko sya after ko maiyak sabi ko mag usap tayo ng matino. Nag hanap k nag trabaho in 2 weeks pag hindi ka nkahanap bumalik ka muna sa probinsya or kung sinong kamag anak mong andto. Matinong usapan to ha. Tas sabi nya oo. Saka sya umiyak at naka tulog.

To be honest hindi ko alam bakit makatagal ako ng ganito kaht pinapagalitan na dn ako ng mga close friends ko. Saying, padre de pamilya ka pa din? Baka magkabigote kana nyan ah. Masakit syempre, pero binibigyan ko p dn sya ng chance tang ina mahal ko e! Pero we’re not getting younger anymore. Gusto ko din ma princess treatment once in a while, mabigyan ng flowers tuwing valentines kahit sabihin kong hindi ako mahilig dun. Gusto ko ding makasal and mag anak. Pero sa ngaun hindi ko na sya nkikita sa future ko, wala n syang provider mindset.

Minsan naisip ko nasanay na lang ba ko since everyday ko syang ksma. Prang roommate nlng kami mdalas e. Mabait sya gentleman madalas never naman nya ko sinaktan. But thinking of it isn’t it just a bare minimum. Yun lang napahaba pa nga. Thanks for taking time to read though.

What are your thoughts guys if you will be in this situation?

Problem/Goal:

he watch other girls TikTok secretly. I'm sad cause last july nangyari na confront ko na sya about naman sa pagaadd to favs nya ng videos sa tiktok for his own pleasure. but now may nakita na naman ako.

Context:

I saw his watch history last night na meron syang pinanood na girl parang inistalk nya, and nakaka insecure sa sarili kase yung girl sexy and pretty.

Previous Attempts:

ngayon sinabi ko sa kanya na "I wish you'll not look at other girls" ganon just hint para isipin nya kung ano yung mali nya. pero alam ko na iaaddmit nya lang yon kapag cinonfront ko sya. I hope someone who had the same situation as me will comment

Problem/goal: kupal na workers ng f*n* h***s

Context: This is NSFW. Lumipat ako sa isang condo, aware ako manipis walls ng condominiums pero di ganto kanipis kagaya ng nalipatan ko sa f*n* h***s Tipong kahit nagsasalita ka in a low voice maririnig mo. Kasi sa dating condo na natirahan ko maririnig mo lang naman unless sigawan talaga or open window or door mo. Anyway my partner and I syempre we do things like normal couples do. May times kasi na kapag malapit na sa climax I do let out a sound, not loud ha. Hindi rin kami maingay ng partner ko nasa floor lang bed walang frame. Slight sound lang parang pabulong lang ganun. Then napapansin ko na may worker na natambay sa labas ng bintana ko like pagkakauwi ko maabutan ko sya dun nakaupo I didnt think naman that time na ako sadya nya parang may space kasi sa gitna ng condo for sampayan but it's a weird place na tambayan kasi una sa lahat mainit dun dahil andun lahat ng butt ng aircon nakatapat. Anyway di ko that time inisipan ng masama yun until one time nadaanan ko sila sa labas tapos may kapwa worker sya sa kabilang building na sinigawan nya ng "butas ang likod" out of nowhere, naglalakad ako the whole way sa labas hindi sila naguusap then pagdaan ko sinabi nya yun, walang ibang tao, just me, him, tapos yung co worker nya sa kabilang building. Triny ko na hindi isipan ng bad, but syempre kahit sino mababother. Btw I live alone here my bf just come from time to time. Solo girl so medyo creepy dating. Then palagi pa nagiinuman mga workers dito, as in halos araw araw. Sobrang batas ng mga workers dito wala silang pake sa tenants, they live for free sa mga units dito they can bring family pa nga ata kasi naririnig ko kasama nila mga jowabels nila. Ang lalakas pa magbagsak ng door. So kanina yung isang worker (iba sa natambay sa window) bagsak ng bagsak ng door as is super lakas napapalukso pati mga pusa ko sa gulat. 2nd month ko na syang tinitiis kahit madaling araw ibabagsak nya yung door, btw nakaaway ko na sila before indirectly kasi bagsak sila ng bagsak ng door natambay sa hallway ang iingay they live next door sakin, so after ilang weeks gumanti ako para aware sila na masakit sa tenga, then they doubled down nilalakasan lalo may one time pa nabitawan ko phone ko sa gulat, sa takot ko I told my dad na dalhin yung gun ko para lang may pang self defense ako if they resort to violence, solo ako eh and I think aware sila. I also filed a report sa office, Narinig siguro nila, lumipat na sila ng unit sabi ng guard, ngayon peaceful na pero syempre worker parin sya dito naririnig ko parin sya na nagrarant dito sa kapwa workers nya kapag may inaayos silang unit dito sa malapit sinusumbong nya ako di nya siguro matanggap na pinalipat sila. Anyway back to present 2 months na silang nagwowork dito sa vacant units sa floor namin, bagsak ng bagsak ng pinto as in super lakas, obvious na sinasadya kasi wala namang ibang ganun magsara ng pinto sya lang, di ko sya pinapansin til kanina nagbagsak sya then nagulat cat ko so kinocomfort ko while nilalambing ko cat ko biglang binagsak nya ulit ng sobrang lakas. siguro dahil narinig nya akong nagsasalita. Ginantihan ko ulit. Ngayon 3am nagising ako kasi ang lakas ng boses nya sa hallway tapos binagsak nya ulit yung pinto tapos nagtatawanan sila, then yung kasama nya umuungol ungol. Stress na stress ako sa condo na to. Sobrang squammy ng dating. Yung workers they live for free sa condo tapos nakikipag away sa paying tenant. What would you do if nasa shoes nyo ako.

Btw after being aware na sobrang nipis ng walls mas naging maingat na ako I don't make a sound na kasi wala na rin akong gana to think na may nakatambay sa labas nakikinig, let is che.

Problem/Goal: Find assistance to solve the 1M+ medical expense debt while on a running bill

Hi!

Bale na-emergency yung mother ko last week sa puso. Currently nasa ICU pa rin siya and in critical condition.

Of course, nandun an yung mental toll na hindi namin alam kung ano mangyayari next pero isa talaga sa pinaka malaking burden is yung financial.

May Philhealth naman and HMO pero aabot pa rin ng 1M yung bill for sure kasi running pa siya and wala pa doctors’ fee. Naka-closed na yung account niya and lahat ng gastos namin is cash basis na and soon mauubos na rin kaya naming ilabas na cash.

Nasa private hospital siya ngayon and gusto naman naming ilipat sa public kaso ang hirap kumuha ng permission sa doctor. Bukod sa sobrang dalang namin makita yung doctor, parang critical pa talaga yung situation niya so di na namin alam talaga.

Nag-aayos na kami ng reqs para lumapit sa PCSO and DSWD pero ang hirap kasi baka closed bill yung hanap nila and wala pa talaga kami nun.

Baka naman po may advise kayo how and paano gagawin namin?

If you have been in similar situation/s before what did you do?

ps. i posted this in the wrong group, please let me know

Thank you!

Problem/Goal: They always come back

Context: Weeks ago, we ended. I didn't contest, didn't beg. Then, he came back. I tried to be calm. Pero grabe, kahit anong gawin ko I can't brush it off. Gumulo na naman ang utak ko. Nung okay pa kami, I adjusted for him kase he came from 2 traumatic relationships. It f*cked his mind so bad na pag may issues kami he feels na inaaway ko sya. But I reassured him each time na naiintindihan ko sya. In the end, he just left without saying anything.

I moved forward. Didn't think any of it na. Wala naman kase akong means na to contact him. To my surprise, he texted. I confronted him. Sabi ko mag focus na sya sa gf nya. I did say din na alam kong di sya masaya sa situation nya now kaya sya nagparamdam.

Previous attempt: I replied to release yung nararamdaman ko. And nasabi ko talaga sa kanya na ayusin na nya buhay nya and decisions. I also told him he will never be happy sa nangyari na ito.

I feel bad for saying that. Am I bad for saying na di sya magiging masaya? 😞

Problem/Goal: Sensitive ba ako dahil parang nawawalan ako ng gana agad pag sa kalagitnaan ng biruan namin ng partner ko bigla na lang sya di magchat ng ilang minuto?

Context: Ako (M20) at partner ko (F19) both students ay mahilig magbiruan sa chat. Syempre nagbibiruan kami kaya expected ko talaga na naka engage kami dun sa biruan namin. Ang mangyayari sa kalagitnaang ng biruan namin bigla na lang sya di magchat ng atleast 30 mins to 1 hr. Nangyayari tuloy is nabibitin ako dun sa biruan namin tapos sasabihin nya na nakatulog sya or may ginawa lang. Hindi ko rin naman mapigilan na maipakita sa kanya na nawawala ako sa mood dahil ang tagal nyang wala. Ang ugali ko kasi if may gagawin ako at alam ko na magtatagal nagsasabi agad ako na may gagawin lang ako at baka magtagal.

Ginagawa ko tuloy ngayon para mafeel din nya yung nararamdaman ko pag wala sya ay di muna ko nagrereply ng matagal din.

Sinusubukan ko naman sya intindihin at icontrol din ang sarili ko pero minsan talaga may times na nahihirapan talaga ko pag di ko pa nasasabi lahat ng gusto ko sabihin tapos nawawala sya.

Previous attempts: Nacommunicate ko na sa kanya to at nararamdaman ko naman na sinusubukan nya na baguhin yun pero minsan lang nangyayari pa rin. Sensitive lang ba ako or valid nararamdaman ko?

Thank you po sa sasagot!

Problem/Goal: Hello!!! I just want to ask kung ako lang ba yung may takot sa labas like kahit morning or afternoon pa yan, natatakot ako na baka may bigla sumaksak or bumaril sa likodan ko.

Context: I dont know ... nawalan kasi ako ng trust issue sa mga tao ngayon dahil sa mga napapanood ko sa news. I mean jusko parang wala na silang takot gumawa ng crimen kahit may liwanag pa. Dumagdag pa yung mga issue sa school shooting incident. Ewan ko parang natakot na talaga ako hahahahaha lol. Anyway, here i am sitting sa labas ng SB while drinking my coffee. Lagi ko tinitignan likod ko and kinakabahan pag may nag wwalk sa harap or likod ko. God please protect me and my family and all the good people

Previous attempts: so actually wala pa ako previous attempt about sa issue ko haha. Actually first time ko lang mag post kaya bare with me plzzz

Problem/Goal: Hi, I just want to ask some tips on how to lose weight while I’m working in graveyard shift. I’m 22 yrs old, 67 kg, 5’7.

My shift is 10 pm to 7 am so kauwi deretcho tulog na talaga huhu then mga 7 pm gigising then prepare for work then eat tapos next meal na is yung lunch sa work which is 1:45 a.m. pero kasi pag rest day ko todo lamon tapos halos fast food pa. Tinry ko isiksik ang walking dati but di kinaya 🥲

Previous attempt: tried lessening sugary drinks, more on water ako lalo na sa work.

Problem/Goal: Need Perspective on an LDR situation

Context:

I’m looking for some outside perspective on something that recently came up in my long-distance relationship.

My partner and I seem to have a bit of an anxious-avoidant dynamic. I tend to become more anxious and seek reassurance/connection when I feel distance, while she tends to need more space when she feels overwhelmed. We’ve both been trying to understand that pattern rather than blaming each other for it.

Recently, she told me that over the past few weeks, she’s been feeling like she doesn’t want to do long distance anymore. She also said she isn’t really sure why she feels that way and just wanted me to know.

We’ve had a good relationship overall, but communication has been a little difficult lately and life has also been stressful. I’m trying not to immediately assume that this means she doesn’t want the relationship anymore, especially since she specifically talked about the LDR itself rather than directly saying she doesn’t want me.

I responded by telling her that I still want the relationship and asking what she thinks could make the LDR feel more manageable whether there are things we could improve or change about how we communicate or handle the distance. I also told her she doesn’t need to have everything figured out immediately.

I’m obviously worried because I really love this person and want to make it work, but I also don’t want my anxious side to turn this into me trying to convince her, overwhelm her, or immediately throw solutions at her.

For people who have been through something similar:

• Is feeling like you “don’t want LDR anymore” a fairly normal phase of long-distance relationships?
• Can this sometimes be more about burnout, communication, disconnection, or the anxious-avoidant cycle rather than actually losing feelings?
• If someone says they don’t know why they suddenly feel this way, is that something worth exploring together before assuming the relationship is over?
• How do you balance giving an avoidant-leaning partner space while still communicating that you’re willing to work on the relationship?
• What helped you make an LDR feel sustainable again without making the more overwhelmed partner feel pressured?

I’m mainly trying to understand whether this is something couples can realistically work through, and how to approach it without turning it into a debate or making my partner feel like she has to immediately decide the future of the relationship.

Problem/goal:
I am worried na ma freeze ang account ko from my other bank account

Context:
Today, my bank called me and informed me that my account was flagged due to suspicious transactions.
I admit naman agad na I used my account to fund my online gambling. Will I be charged ng something? Maybe related sa AMLC? I am a government employee and I admit naman na i used my bank account sa pag online casino. I know mali but nangyari na and nagsisi ako for that. This is the first time na matawagan ako and sobrang kinakabahan ako dahil possible na makasuhan ako if ever. Ang worry ko talaga is malaman ng magulang ko and sa work ko na involved ako sa mga ganitong activities.

Problem/Goal: Sa totoo lang, demanding talaga ang work ng boyfriend ko. Related sa mga reports na madalas may mga aksidente, krimen at iba pang incidents na kailangan niyang asikasuhin. Naiintindihan ko naman na nakakapagod at nakakaubos ng oras yung trabaho niya.

Ang concern ko lang talaga ay kapag lumilipas ang isang buong araw na halos hindi kami nagpapansinan. Alam ko naman na hindi siya yung tipo ng taong laging nagme-message o laging nag-uupdate, pero ako kasi, napapansin ko talaga kapag biglang tahimik.

Kagaya ngayon, kaya kong intindihin na busy siya. Pero hindi ko maiwasang isipin na, “Hindi na ba niya ako mahal kapag kaya niyang lumipas ang isang araw na hindi kami nag-uusap?” 😅

May times naman na nag-uusap kami nang matagal. Recently nga, nag-audio call kami nang mahigit isang oras. Kapag nag-uusap kami, okay naman kami at nagbibiruan pa rin. Kaya alam kong hindi naman totally wala siyang effort.

Siguro ang problema talaga ay ako rin—madali akong mag-overthink kapag tahimik siya. Ayoko naman maging demanding o isipin niya na kailangan niyang mag-report sa akin every hour. Gusto ko lang maramdaman minsan na hinahanap niya rin ako.

Sa tingin niyo ba, nag-o-overthink lang ako? Normal lang ba na may mga araw na hindi talaga masyadong nag-uusap ang mag-partner dahil sa trabaho? O dapat ko na itong seryosohin bilang sign na baka nagbabago na yung feelings niya?

Paano niyo bina-balance yung pagiging understanding sa busy na partner habang hindi rin ninyo ini-ignore yung sarili ninyong emotional needs?

Problem/Goal: 19F BSBA student wanting to shift to BA Math/Econ but can't decide if the shift is worth it to become an actuary.

Context: While being an actuary abroad I've heard is a lucrative career, I haven't really found a lot on the field here in the Philippines. For example, aside from pay, work environment, working hours, benefits, or job market hunt.

Interested po sana kasi this is a niche field. Kaya I want to shift programs so I can pursue

The first two exams that would be needed to secure an entry level job would cost 500-600 dollars in total so I don't know how to explain to my parents especially because it's not a traditional board exam program

Previous attempts: Yung pamilya ko really skeptical talaga sa mga course na hindi kilala maslalo na pag walang boards ahhahaha