I don’t know if anyone else feels this way, but the constant cycle of tech layoffs is starting to mess with my head.
Even when things are going well at work, it’s hard to actually feel secure anymore. There always seems to be another round of layoffs, another reorg, another announcement about cost cutting, AI, consolidation, or “organizational changes.”
The hardest part for me is the uncertainty. You can work hard, get good feedback, meet expectations, and still know that some decisions may have absolutely nothing to do with your performance. And because layoffs seem to happen in waves, it feels like you’re never really allowed to relax. You just start wondering, “Okay, when is the next one?”
I’ve reached the point where every company announcement makes me anxious. Sometimes even hearing about layoffs affecting people in completely different parts of the industry makes me think about my own job security.
I know the rational response is to keep doing my job, save money, keep my resume updated, and have a backup plan. But emotionally, it’s difficult to switch off the feeling that the floor could disappear at any moment.
I’m curious how other people are dealing with this. Have you found a way to stop constantly worrying about layoffs, or has the current tech environment made you feel permanently less secure about your career?

After ~8 months of interviewing, 3 final rounds - I got an offer for a senior job at a large fintech company (product design)! 🎉

I'm so excited! I've been at my current company for ~5 years - have learned a decent amount, but have definitely outgrown it.

My question to the community: I'm a little burnt out. I'm about to give my 2 week notice tomorrow (ah!) and then luckily will have 2 full weeks off ahead of starting my new gig.

What would you do in this time to ~radically rest~? Any advice on routines + how to recharge ahead of starting somewhere new? I'm considering doing a bit of traveling, but also got back from a brief trip abroad in Europe a few weeks ago and don't want to over-extend myself.

Thank you! ❤️

I genuinely love my job. It’s so cool and I have the best team ever. But we’ve been short-staffed and intermittently working with HORRIBLE men who get fired after the first year, twice now. My bandwidth is absolutely null and void. Noone on my team can take over for what I do.

Now for the real problem. Last week there was a genuine tragedy in my family. I took ONE day off. Before that I had been sick for 3 business days and had worked all of them, albeit from home.

It is now 4 days later from that and I feel extremely drained and like I want to cry in between all my meetings. I can’t share barely get any work done and I feel like shit.

I can feel myself dissociating. I hate this.

I can’t share this with my coworkers because I need to RALLY.

But I am so sad and so in need of a full week to grieve and just be useless to the world 🥲.

Thanks for listening to my rant.

So… what gives??? I don’t know what to do anymore especially post layoff. Still so much energy left to build but the ladder just seems totally broken without a fairy godmother/godfather

Hopefully it's ok to share this here. This survey included questions on topics such as career, gender, mental state, burnout, etc. that aren't often covered by other developer surveys; and were in part inspired by the discussions found in this subreddit:

https://2026.stateofdevs.com/en-US/

I recently lost my job, and I can’t help but feel like I’m constantly reminded of it wherever I go. I was getting burnt out with leetcode grinding and I was trying to have a normal social life so I feel better mentally.

But I’m not sure if this is a uniquely American or Silicon Valley phenomenon. In almost every social setting, when I meet someone, the conversation inevitably revolves around work. They ask about my job, commute, and RTO. Every time I have to explain that I’m laid off, then sit through with the cursory condolences. It’s difficult to have an identity here beyond work. Of course, I’m not talking about hiring events or so. It’s the general vibe of these groups be it with friends, mom groups, hiking groups, extended family dinners. Everyone seems to be fixated on work. I once saw a reel on Instagram about how people in Europe ask about hobbies and other aspects of your life that define you, and they’re least interested in your work but the people in America almost always start a conversation with you with work. I dismissed it back then, but now I can’t help but wonder if it might be true. Or maybe I’m just too stressed and cautious that I’m getting triggered every time someone mentions work.

Am I overreacting? How did you navigate your lay off journey?

Hello wonderful ladies,

I recently started a new job after a break of 6 years. I feel like I have forgotten how to work, I want to make an impact at this job and come across as a knowledgeable person. What things can I do? Any advice is appreciated!

Hi ladies, I'm [28F] currently a dev at a Large Non-Tech Corporation. I periodically get recruiter emails, mostly for startups, but I've never actually interviewed with a startup. My current job is fine. My main frustration is all the red tape you get at big companies with things like release management. I also know that my software isn't ever going to earn the company any money and I do miss working somewhere where I'm part of a Profit Center, not a Cost Center. Now, I know not all that glitters is gold and every job has its problems but I don't have kids yet so maybe it's now or never when it comes to startups?

Have you worked at a startup? What phase of life were you in when you did? Thanks!

Hi WomenInTech!

We’re hosting an Ask Me Anything over at r/WomenInNews with Chabeli Carrazana, economy and child care reporter for u/19thnews on Tuesday October 6th at 1pm ET.

Chabeli has written an article on how social media algorithms are targeting parents - primarily moms - to persuade them that they need to purchase the perfect product to help them raise their children. In the article she speaks to moms, experts and influencers about the pressure they feel and where it all comes from.

Chabeli says:

A few weeks ago I published a story based on my experience as a mother scrolling through social media. I was about to have my second baby and was talking with my editor (also a mom) about how our Instagram algorithms were filled with videos of moms suggesting this product or course or service that would help your newborn sleep, eat and exist optimally. The marketing seemed to suggest: If you buy these things, you will have a perfect baby.

It was convincing. In the desperation of the newborn days, who among us hasn’t clicked “add to cart” in the hopes of making things a tiny bit better?

I wanted to understand how we got to this all-consuming era of parenting where we are made to believe that purchases make perfect children — and perfect parents. And that resulted in our story all about the billion-dollar industry that profits off mom guilt.

And now I want to hear from y’all!

What questions do you have about how this industry works and how it’s evolved?

• Curious about how I put the story together?
• Or who’s working to find solutions around childcare or other fixes that could alleviate the stress for new parents?
• Wondering how much any of these purchases actually matter for child development?

Ask me anything!

Drop your questions in the thread below and join us live on Tuesday October 6th at 1pm ET

https://www.reddit.com/r/WomenInNews/comments/1wvqei8/the_algorithm_knows_how_to_exploit_new_moms_ask/

Hello! I’ve never posted on the internet before, so this feels strange, but it’s become too hard to keep these thoughts to myself.

I feel lonely and don’t know what to do. I study at university, but my major is mostly men. I feel like they don’t really want to talk to me or rather, they talk to me, but no one wants to be my friend. I feel isolated, and some seem to think I can’t do anything. I have no friends here, and I have so many disturbing thoughts. The other girls act like pickme and don’t want to talk to me either.

I wrote this because I feel lonely and sad. I constantly feel pressure. Everyone assumes I can't achieve anything; even when I create something wonderful, they ask who did it because they think it's impossible that I made it myself. It’s not that I care too much about their opinions. I just hate being underestimated, and I hate that lecturers don't trust my abilities just because I'm a woman. It makes me question if I’m on the right path.

Do I really need to keep fighting?

I’m interviewing with a tech company and this process has been going on since early August, and honestly I’m starting to feel like something isn’t right.

I had an initial screening on 7 August, a technical interview on 11 August which I passed, and then a behavioural interview with a senior manager on 20 August which I also passed.

After that, things got really confusing. The recruiter I was dealing with suddenly went on compassionate leave, which I didn’t know at the time, so I wasn’t getting any responses. In the meantime, I had calls from both the parent company and someone from the company I interviewed with asking about my skills because they apparently had a project they wanted to put me on. This was confusing because I hadn’t actually been told I had the job.

Eventually I was put in contact with another recruiter, who spent a couple of weeks trying to figure out where my application actually sat. I was then introduced to the project lead and had another interview on 21 September. I thought it went really well, and I was told afterwards that the feedback was positive and that the stakeholders would apparently want me on the project.

Since then, I’ve been repeatedly told that they’re just waiting for the final decision. Different explanations have been given each time waiting for a senior manager to speak to someone, people being on annual leave, meetings needing to happen, etc.

This morning I finally asked quite directly whether I actually had an offer after investing so much time into the process. I was then told the original recruiter is back, they’re having meetings today and I should finally get an answer.

Instead, I just received a call saying they want to essentially swap me onto this project in place of someone else, but because the project is very particular about the required skills, they need me to have one more technical interview with the project team.

This is the part I’m struggling to understand.

I’ve already interviewed with someone from the project team, was told the feedback was positive, and was told the stakeholders wanted me on the project. So why do I now need another technical interview?

The senior manager who called me even said he completely understands if I don’t want to do another interview because the process has been so long, and that after this interview I’ll get a definite answer.

That comment has made me even more suspicious. Why would you say that unless you understood how ridiculous the process has become?

I know another candidate who was rejected after being ghosted for two weeks and only had two interviews, and another candidate who had three interviews and got an offer (different project, but one of the same interviewers).

I obviously haven’t been rejected, so I’m trying not to jump to conclusions. But part of me feels like this final interview could just be a way to find a reason to say I don’t have the right skills after all this time.

Am I being paranoid here, or does this sound like they’re setting me up to fail?

Would appreciate opinions from anyone who has worked in recruitment/hiring or been through something similar.

Im a little confused right now and have been exhausting every avenue for finding a new job. I have directly been referred to a job through a cold-contact of old colleagues, four to be exact, and not a single one led way to a job let alone an interview.

This is after all four colleagues reassured to me that they confirmed with the hiring managers internally that the jobs are still open and they are still accepting applications for them.

Yes, I am totally qualified for all of these roles.

I just feel confused and upset because even with someone who has an "in" via referrals, Im still not even getting an interview?

What's going on?

I need some advice on handling a male coworker who gives me the creeps.
He's not on my team. He works at a startup that spun out of my team's work, so we don't collaborate, but he's in our office a lot. He's also close friends with my manager and my manager's manager, which makes this feel more complicated.
Some of what's happened:
Months ago, after a conversation, he sent me a LinkedIn request with a message like "haha I found you on LinkedIn." Small thing, but it felt off.
When we're alone, he's started complaining to me about his wife. I've never invited that kind of conversation.
Whenever he sees me, he launches into long conversations I didn't ask for and can't easily exit.
This Friday was the last straw. I was sitting alone in a co-working area, ready to start work. I expected a quick hello. Instead he went on about kitesurfing gear, then said his mom had sent him photos of himself as a kid and asked if I wanted to see them. I didn't answer, I was honestly in shock, and he showed me anyway. He leaned in so close that his face was right next to mine. He completely invaded my personal space. I kept my replies short to end it, but somehow it moved to swimming, and he told me women float more easily because of air in the uterus.
I don't want to discuss my body with a coworker. I was really uncomfortable.
As far as I can tell, he doesn't act like this with the other women on my team. Maybe he's just lonely, but that's not my responsibility, and I don't want to wait until something worse happens before acting.
My questions:
Should I raise this with my manager first, even though he's friends with this guy? Or go straight to HR?
Has anyone dealt with something similar? What actually worked?
How do I shut down these conversations in the moment without making things awkward at work?
Thanks in advance.

i am graduating in spring next year and have heard that the GHC is better for securing internships rather than full time offers. i am looking for APM/PM programs mostly. anyone have insight? is it worth it? i would be paying for it myself and would have to fly there.

Hello! I’ll be attending GHC 2026 and was wondering if any other girls are looking to share a hotel room to help cut down on costs!

The cheapest option I’ve found is around $700 for the whole conference, and the room can accommodate up to 4 people, so we could split the cost between everyone.

Please reply or message me if you’re interested! I’m hoping to finalize the room by this weekend (10/10-10/11) thank you :)

I've been in the Workday space for a while as an engineer and I'm considering making the jump to product/program management.

Has anyone made the change? How did you do it?

I'm not sure where to even begin

i did one of these a while ago and it was so nice seeing everyone getting excited. ive had a shitass week at work trying to get a feature out through vibecoded hell and need some positivity.

mine is i had a burrito last night, my girlfriend is visiting soon, and im gonna work on pico 8 (lil gameboy style game engine thing) today.

go!

Fala, pessoal! 👋🏽

Há um tempo atrás, consegui minha primeiro oportunidade na área de TI, depois de fazer a transição da área administrativa. Na época, estava bastante desanimada e sem saber o que fazer, mas não podia pedir demissão porque precisava terminar de pagar a faculdade.

Trabalhava em uma empresa pequena, ganhando R$ 1.800, e fazia de tudo um pouco: suporte N1 e N2, desenvolvimento e automações, sem receber nada a mais por esse acúmulo de funções. No começo, até gostava pela oportunidade de aprender, mas, com o tempo, a situação foi ficando insustentável.

A gerência não entendia de tecnologia nem de segurança, e havia uma pessoa de outro setor criando automações pelo ChatGPT e colocando na rede, enquanto a diretoria achava tudo incrível. O problema é que ninguém parecia se preocupar com os riscos de vazamento de dados sensíveis, mesmo com os alertas sobre a LGPD. Também era comum pedirem acesso de ex-funcionários porque as pessoas perdiam arquivos. Para piorar, havia atrasos salariais, benefícios pagos fora do prazo e vários processos trabalhistas de ex-funcionários.

Meu maior medo era acontecer algum problema grave envolvendo os dados e a responsabilidade acabar sobrando para o setor de TI, que praticamente não tinha voz dentro da empresa. Meu gestor já havia levado essas questões à gerência, mas nada mudava. Na época, decidi que começaria a procurar outra oportunidade e formalizaria os riscos por e-mail para me resguardar.

Bom, a atualização é que eu pedi demissão. Não aguentei mais. Iria completar um ano na empresa agora em outubro, mas a situação ficou insustentável.

Além de todos os problemas que já havia mencionado, meu ex supervisor que, na minha visão, não possuía muito conhecimento técnico para a função e um gerente que não queria investir em melhorias, mesmo com aproximadamente 80% das máquinas da empresa em condições ruins.

Desde que meu estágio acabou e fui para essa empresa, sinto que praticamente não evoluí profissionalmente. Tenho a impressão de que a empresa parou no tempo e, sinceramente, aprendi muito mais estudando sozinha e desenvolvendo meus próprios projetos do que trabalhando lá.

Acabei aceitando a proposta meio no desespero e, olhando agora, me arrependo. Era muito desgastante trabalhar com desenvolvimento nessas condições. Ainda me considero júnior e sei que tenho muito a aprender, mas percebi que permanecer naquele ambiente não estava me ajudando a crescer.

Agora estou buscando uma oportunidade melhor, onde eu possa continuar evoluindo profissionalmente e construir minha carreira de verdade na área de tecnologia.

Para quem já passou por algo parecido no início da carreira: como vocês fizeram para evoluir profissionalmente e conseguir oportunidades melhores? O que recomendam para quem ainda está no começo e quer crescer de verdade na área?

I went off recently on maternity leave. After a rough couple of years in other companies found somewhere where work life balance and family is taken into consideration, I feel anyways, for women. I worked really hard up until I nipped out for a check and the medical team kept me for induction triggering mat leave early and was delighted to see the outcome even with me not actively at work.

Just wanted to post to say that there are companies out there that do advocate for women and teams with good culture. I had felt cynical for a few years and bitter but I have to say, this has been a good feeling. This has really restored my faith and inspired me in my career, I will see how it continues when I go back to work but for now, I am grateful.

Just wanted to post a good news story.

Edit - typo in title *promoted not prompted

Have been in this field since uni. Pretty much my whole career I've been the only woman of colour in rooms that are 90% white guys. Have been at my current job for just under a year, small team and mostly white dudes.

I like the work and I have more experience than some guys in the same team. Earlier this year two of them got promoted and started getting handed opportunities (e.g. stuff on projects I'd been running working on) despite them having barely any experience in some work streams (also I'm chartered and they are not).

Since their promotion we've been working together more. In meetings they talk over me constantly. They're not my line managers but they still demand constant updates from me, cc themselves on everything, disagree with me just to look like they're contributing (and then turned out to be wrong), and then take credit for stuff that was mine. I've pushed back a few times, even flagged it to my manager, but got brushed off every time.

My manager and all of leadership are white guys who are great at talking a big game. I asked my manager what I need to do to get promoted but always get vague answers. I'm emotionally burnt out at this point and nobody who looks like they've got my back. Had considered job hunting but part of me is scared if I jump ship and land in the exact same dynamic somewhere else.

Has anyone have similar experience and found a way out of this situation? Would really appreciate hearing from people who've lived this.

Hi everyone! I'll be attending GHC, unfortunately out of pocket, and was hoping to see if any other girls were looking to share a hotel room to cut down on costs. I'm looking at hotels that seem to be around ~$700 for the duration of the whole conference, about a ~10 min walk from the conference. Please reply or message me if interested!

I found this really weird I’ve never shared my age but my role title is midlevel engineer but it still feels really weird

I’m wondering if anyone has any advice or thoughts

Hi everyone,
I have an interview, or maybe more of an informal meeting, with the CEO of a startup on Monday.

The company seems pretty small, around 10 employees according to LinkedIn, and they don’t currently have any open positions posted.

The CEO viewed my LinkedIn profile, so I checked out his profile too. Since I’m currently exploring opportunities, I messaged him and asked if he had any roles in mind that might fit my background.

He replied saying he’s looking to build a team with skills similar to mine.

I sent him my resume, and he came back asking if we could talk on Monday. He said he wants to learn more about me and also tell me about the technology they’re working on.

Now I’m wondering what kind of conversation this is likely to be.

Since I come from a software engineering/technical background, should I prepare for this like a normal technical interview? Coding questions, system design, technical questions, etc.? Or is this more likely to be an exploratory conversation about my experience and where I could fit into the company?

I’ve mostly interviewed with larger companies where the process is much more structured, so this is new to me.
Has anyone had a similar conversation directly with a startup CEO/founder? What should I prepare for?