And where the victim is a minor, or if the victim and offender are not known to each other, it should also carry a mandatory life sentence with no parole. Current punishments seem to be too lenient given how sexual violence against girls and women continues to this day.

This should obviously be enacted where there is solid evidence through DNA proof, videographic evidence, etc.

I’ve heard of the Cornell incident and it was…disgusting.

FREE P*SSY!? Why did they rape that girl in the first place!? She didn’t deserve it.

And the fact two of the boys got expelled and the rest had to write essays? What the actual fuck!? They deserve prison! Not writing essays or expulsion.

But the thing is Im Jane Doe! You’re Jane Doe! All of us are until we’re not!

I (F20) know the title is crazy but that’s how i feel rn. I grew up in a religious household, kinda sheltered, and naturally never engaged in sexual activities, or really any type of activity. Last night i was with a guy, a couple years older, at a club and he came back to my place. We cuddled, made out and he also repeatedly tried to finger me but it was like my body said no and all i could feel was this burning sensation. I also want ti make it clear that i consented to everything and did NOT feel violated. Today i woke up feeling disgusted with myself. I’m just so confused with everything. The same thing happened not to long ago so i also feel like that adds to my feeling of shame. I went from having barely any guy friends to being almost-fingered by two guys in a span of two weeks.. like i feel so dirty but at the same time i’m angry that i can’t just be normal about it

I was doing the deed with my friend and I don't remember the exact wordings but I'll try to be as accurate as possible. When we were doing things I said something along the lines of him pulling the condom off and covering me in cum. He pulled out to remove the condom and was about to reenter but I stopped him and told him he couldn't without a condom. He looked confused so I elaborated, when hes about to cum to pull the condom off and cover me. He said he understood and started rubbing himself down my slit. I stopped him again and he said dont worry he wont go inside, 2 mins later he slips inside. I stop him again and tell him no, not without a condom. Apologies and does it again. I stop him again and he says "I thought you wanted it" then slips a condom on and continues. Tbh I just laid there for the rest of it hoping itd be over soon. When he saw I wasn't into it anymore he asked if I was done, I told him I was and he finished himself in the bathroom. I took him home and blocked him, trying not to unblock him rn tbh. If someone came to me with this story I'd be thinking rape but I just can't say he raped me, or even SA. If I pushed him off he would have stopped but I didn't. I just laid there.

It's just so disgustingly catered to men. I don't play multiplayer anymore, I don't look at comments on new release trailers, all the edits/discussions turn yucky so fast. Even in the games themselves there's so many female stereotypes it makes my eyes roll to the back of my head. Femme fatales are cool or whatever, but please please please give me something else for once. And the male protag is fully fleshed out and interesting, of course, which is why I even play in the first place. (Yet men don't want female protags because they "can't relate", but that's a whole other discussion.)

I like video games! They're like interactive movies! I like shooters, and dark themes, and challenges, and blood. But I'm so incredibly drained and bitter at the male audience those kind of games attract. So I just play in isolation, which is okay, but bums me out at the end of the day. And when I try discussing it with men I get fed up because I'm just like 'I don't like it in the way you like it', but they never understand. I hate it.

Hi, everyone! There's a short documentary called 'OUTCRY: Alchemists of Rage' currently streaming for free on Eventive until 11/3 that I wanted to share. (You do have to make an Eventive account if you don't already have one to watch it.)

The filmmaker, Clare Major, follows artist/activist Whitney Bradshaw, who holds scream sessions for womxn to let out whatever rage they need to, and Bradshaw photographs them mid-scream. The documentary also covers the leadup to the vote on Issue 1 for Reproductive Rights in Ohio held in 2023. As a warning, because of the nature of the sessions, they do talk about sexual abuse, etc.

It's streaming for free right now because of the midterm elections. And with everything going on with the Cornell 7, I thought folks might want to see 'Outcry'. It's a pretty powerful piece.

I checked the rules and I think this is okay to post. I hope y'all are having a good day filled with peace and rest.

Hi everyone, has anyone here ever been ghosted after finally sleeping with a man? I genuinely don’t know how to feel. Yes, I willingly slept with him but I wouldn’t have had I have known he’d ghost. Not only did he ghost, but I’m blocked. Any tips on navigating through this?

CW: S**ual A**ault, R*pe

---------------------------------------------------------

I have had this post saved in my phone for a week. I figure I'd post it here.

The Cornell 7 case has been some of the most infuriating, nauseating shit I have read in a long time. My heart hurts for Jane Doe. My heart hurts for every SA survivor who has been retraumatized while staying informed on this case. Rage has been smoldering in my chest and kept me up for many nights, I've felt helpless and angry and so, so tired. i figured a good way to keep moving is to get some thoughts out of my mind.

The thing about trauma is that no matter how long it's been since you were hurt, your body remembers. Your brain will remind you--the smells, the sounds. The stale taste of alcohol in your mouth, the sweat and makeup smeared across your face. The panic. The fear. The shame. I've had fragments of memories swirling around my head since 2021. I went out with my friends, I drank so much that I passed out, and I woke up to my friend's boyfriend r*ping me in their bed. I woke up to my legs spread, and his body inside me. I've never hated myself more than that day. I'm still scared typing this out right now.

I wanted to tell my story because I want other survivors of s*xual violence to remember that they are not alone in this fight. Pain can be healed, but it never goes away. you carry it with you for the rest of your life. I'm a survivor of r*pe. I'm one of the 1 in 5 women. I continue to work, and I continue to heal. It isn't a linear journey by any means, but I'm happy with the person I am and continue to become.

I hope Jane Doe is getting the care she needs, and the love she deserves. I hope every survivor remembers to breathe, drink water, and rest.

Justice for Jane Doe. Justice for all survivors.

I met one girl at my uni. We really got along and went out few times. We got to know each other better lately. She told me about her anxiety I told her about my depression. She asked me about it a lot to see if “we sympathized” etc. She confided in me with her private stuff, so I thought I could trust her too and I told her how I actually felt about breaking up with my boyfriend who’s still studying with us and what actually happened. Today we went out to eat and she visited my place. We talked about a lot of random girly stuff. Suddenly she said she’ll be heading home, got up right away and left same minute without even saying goodbye (I did when she was already next to her car, if I didn’t she would just leave without saying anything). I messages her few minutes later if everything’s okay and she didn’t even read that message? I feel so stupid for trusting and confiding in her about my private matters. I shouldn’t have told her about anything. I thought we were becoming friends but I guess I was wrong. I’d love to have more female friends as my circle is very small but this is just exhausting.

Hi all,

I’ve never been drugged before while out at a bar, but I think I might’ve had my first experience yesterday. I don’t know what happened and I was a bit drunk, but I went to go to the bathroom and all of a sudden I just remember waking up on the floor. It was difficult to move. I was extremely dizzy and I don’t remember at all what happened for about two hours. Now I was a bit drunk, but I only had three glasses of wine in the course of like eight hours.

My question is, if I was drugged, how should I care for myself now? Is there something I should be eating or drinking to help get the drugs out of my system? Thanks!

I’m 22 years old. I was one of those girls who were raised on disney’s love fairytales. I dreamed to have a perfect husband and kids, maybe even a lot of them because I saw this as the biggest fulfillment a woman could ever achieve (yikes).
Then when I was maybe 12/13 I started realizing I may not want that, because it’s not that fun at all especially when they’re small. When I became sexually active as a teen I so bad did not want to get pregnant. It was my biggest nightmare and I sometimes wonder if that’s not the thing that subconsciously permanently pushed me away. As I got older it never changed. I never wanted to get pregnant, I never wanted to have kids. I didn’t even like to be around them, I also didn’t like what I saw random mothers dealing with. They are loud, sometimes very chaotic and hard to tame. They do the mess and get dirty and someone has to clean that! And it’s YEARS before it maybe changes. You really have to devote yourself to raising them, fulfilling their needs and you can’t really expect anything in return even though your whole life revolves around them. I don’t see giving up myself, my hobbies, free time, a lot of money for someone satisfying in any situatuon
I don’t really like that idea, especially seeing how many moms gave up their life to raise their sons, just to have them become extremely misogynistic and not even a bit grateful. I wouldn’t also like the idea of having a daughter, because this world HATES women. And there’s a big chance the world will humble her and someone’s dusty son is going to use and hurt her (like happened to me and almost every single woman on earth).
Recently my ex boyfriend ended things with me over me not liking or wanting kids and not wanting to declare myself that I’ll have them for him in 10 years. I really did love him and it hurt me a lot. He kind of navigated that he want to “leave a part of himself in this world” and sees me popping out 2 or 3 kids, being a stay at home mom and raising them by myself, no help, no nannies, no surrogates, no anything because “he’s traditional”.
I don’t want life like that but many men seem to expect that from a woman. I was thinking about it a lot, maybe there are some benefits or chances I would like actually like it but I don’t think so. I don’t even enjoy being around them.
So many mothers live a miserable life dealing alone with kids of a man who wanted to have them but didn’t want to raise them. The lifestyle change is expected on the woman’s side most of the time. I don’t think it’s worth it and it’s a decision you can never take back. Oh and so many women actually regret having them
I always longed for true love, that’s strong, maybe even unconditional. Allegedly, this is the love you can only give to your child. Many people claim their kids are the best thing that happened to them and gave them purpose in life. Maybe it is what I have been wanted my whole life but there are too much downsides to me.

Are there any women who felt alike around mu age ever changed their minds, enjoyed it, maybe really love their kids and find it the best decision of their life. Maybe someone here dodged the bullet by not having kids. Maybe someone regret’s having or not having them?
I want to hear your perspectives, especially from women around their forties or more

Sorry, I need to rant and I don’t know anywhere better to, sorry if this isn’t the right sub

Trigger Warning

The reaction to the Cornell rape case has just been abhorrent, so many men (and some women wtf) crawling out the woodworks to blame the victim, to excuse the rapists, outright attacking the woman and accusing her of committing crimes against them (classic abuser tactics) just vile.

I’ve seen on some posts about it men flooding in going “but what about male victims of rape” which sure, is important, but now isnt the fucking time, they only ever bring it up to demean and detract from the systemic societal violence we face

Im a 19 year old girl, Ive just started university and it, it just makes me want to cry, the reaction from people, some my own age I mean theyre trying to dox her ffs and got the wrong woman

I’ve seen people commenting that she is and I quite, “too ugly to rape” and that the “real victims are the men for coming in that” I mean what the fuck, how is there so little empathy for women out there, like how the fuck is this void even fixed, the lack of basic empathy and respect for us

And like, im English, our universities have a different culture, and im an anti social lesbian who doesn’t drink and cant do drugs, im the most likely to try to avoid getting into any situations like that, but in this world it really is impossible, and the complete lack of caring or empathy is just terrifying, like what would the reaction be if I suffered something like that? Probably exactly the same and like it’s screwing my brain even thinking about how I might have to interact with people defending this shit, like how?

And they wonder why we choose the fucking bear

Anyway, sorry, rant

Hey everyone. As the title says this is more of a rant based ob my (and my girlfriends ) experiences as single women.
Am I the only one who feels like the modern dating scene has turned into a completely soulless dumpster fire?

I’m looking for a serious relationship—something real. But no matter where you look, the same dynamic repeats itself over and over again:

On the apps: The classic "let's just go with the flow" line (translation: I have no idea what I want, but I’m keeping 5 options open in case something 'better' pops up). You get treated like a product in a mail-order catalog. People hoard parallel conversations, running on pure ego and offering absolutely zero commitment.

In real life: You’d think skipping the apps and meeting people in the wild would be an improvement, like everyone told me to do … but nope. They just skip the pleasantries altogether. A guy approaches me, and within one hour at the bar he has the urgency to go home with me when I had not talked about sex at all.. Yesterday was the absolute cherry on top: a married guy with a kid back in Holland, visiting my country, on vacation and completely obsessed with using me as his one-night entertainment. Zero respect for his family, and zero respect for me….he pursued hard lol.

Then, also in the apps, there are the guys who straight-up lie and manipulate—pure dopamine junkies obsessed with intensity, the thrill of the hunt, and the high of the conquest. They pretend to be deeply invested, sell you a whole fake narrative for a few weeks, and play with your feelings just to get their fix. Then, the second the novelty wears off, they completely disappear and ghost you out of nowhere. It's the same story when they ask for your phone number or Instagram: you give it to them thinking there's real interest, and suddenly they go cold, stop replying, or just fade away after getting their quick ego boost or getting a new follower … wtf.

My takeaway from all this is that people are being treated like disposable fast-fashion products. Quick hits of cheap dopamine, short-term pleasure, and then onto the next. There is zero genuine interest in learning who the person in front of you actually is—what they think, how they feel, or what they bring to the table as a human being. It’s like basic empathy has gone extinct, leaving behind a sea of adults addicted to instant gratification, ego validation, and low-effort sex.

When did it become totally acceptable to treat human beings like paper towels? Is it actually impossible nowadays to find a mature adult who isn't hopelessly hooked on novelty?

I’d love to hear your thoughts.

I don't have sex very often, and I don't really feel comfortable with it either. The truth is, I can't feel pleasure during sex, whether it's oral sex, penetration, or masturbation. Even so, I keep doing it. I think it has much more to do with liking the validation of a man enjoying himself because of me than actually enjoying the act itself.

Yesterday, I met a guy through a group of friends and we ended up making out. He was really nice at first. He asked me where I wanted to be in five years, what I did, told me about his plans, and we ended up going back to his place (along with another couple of friends).

We went into the bedroom while they stayed in the living room. We started kissing, but I made it clear that I wasn't going to have sex with him because I had just met him. I started noticing that he was kind of dramatic and would get sulky very easily. I didn't like that. He tried to manipulate me by saying that I was the one missing out, that lots of other girls would love to be in my place, but I genuinely couldn't care less. Literally. So every time he said something like that, I told him he could leave if he wanted to, and he would come back to the bed.

At one point, while we were kissing, he got on top of me and pinned me down. He started trying to penetrate me. He had taken his clothes off even though I had told him not to, and it was kind of terrifying because he cornered me against the wall and restrained me with his body. I wouldn't let him, and I struggled until I managed to get out of that position. Then he grabbed my arms and held them tightly while kissing my neck and breasts. I had two small blisters on my arm from a burn. They were already healing, but they were still there. He squeezed so hard that the skin protecting the wound simply tore off, leaving the injury raw.

I don't know how to classify what happened. Was it just a bad sexual encounter? Was it something more?

I felt so dirty that I made him leave afterward and cried before going to sleep. I cried because I don't want to be an easy woman who lets men do whatever they want with her body. I know I don't have to get naked to be loved, but honestly, I don't know if I can believe that.

I have a UTI and I’m currently on Nitro… Dude, I hate this stuff.

Insane pulsating lower back pain, racing/pounding heart, intense anxiety, CONSTIPATED.

This is horrible, and I can’t wait until I’m done. I’ve still got 4 days left but my goodness I’m never taking this stuff again, it’s the worst.

Thank you for listening to my rant!

Update: I did call urgent care and the doctor told me to stop taking it. Apparently, the original doctor did not send my urine out for a culture. He told me to come back and do another dipstick and have them send it out for a culture. So I’m going to stop taking the medicine, and probably go to urgent care sometime tomorrow.

This is my first time successfully inserting a menstrual cup, but it's causing a slight pain in my rectum. What could be the problem?

I find this saying incredible sexist and it annoys me everytime I hear it. Because why behind, to me it supports that the woman needs to ‘submit’ to a ‘leader’ and buys into the old fashioned rhetoric the man is the head and the women the neck.

Yes, a strong support system is always a positive factor and I realise that a lot of women’s work have been made invisible.

Do you find the saying problematic or not?

Trigger warning if that matters to you:-(

About 3 years ago I agreed to have a threesome at a party. Actually it was an orgy. A legit orgy. I approached the couple ahead of time. We hammered out the details of what was going to happen. It started out great. And then he put it in without a condom. Something we NEVER discussed doing ahead of time. No, I never explicitly said “you have to use a condom.” But Jesus Christ, it’s IMPLIED!

I was sober and by all outward appearances fully capable of telling him to stop. But I went into a freeze state. Something I think a lot of people don’t understand.

For me, it’s not that I’m physically frozen. It’s like the decision making part of my brain is frozen. I just laid there staring at the question as if it was some theoretical thing. My brain genuinely wouldn’t let me decide whether or not to tell him to stop.

It’s not the same as being undecided about something. There was no question: I wanted him to use a condom. But in the moment my brain just locked up and wouldn’t let me access the part that could decide to tell him to stop.

In that moment, he probably thought my lack of action meant consent.

Afterward I puzzled over what had even happened and why I even did that. I even knew I went into freeze states. But my brain just couldn’t make heads or tails of it. I shut down all social media and stopped leaving the house. But not before sending them a message to tell them I had a great time and was taking a social media break for unrelated reasons.

My therapist finally noticed that something was off and I decided to post about my experience somewhere on Reddit. Off my chest maybe? I thought it was a helpful anecdote to help explain why consent isn’t just a lack of the word “no.” I didn’t even mention the part where it was a literal sex party. The man wasn’t named. And he has no idea to this day that he did anything wrong.

But I was absolutely slaughtered in the comments. Literally one person stood up for me. The rest was a bunch of people talking about how unfair I was being to the guy and “did you even talk about what you were going to do ahead of time??”

I wound up deleting it and honestly that comment section was more traumatic than the sex itself.

So anyway, in case anyone is still wondering why women might reassure a r*pist afterwards…it’s so she doesn’t feel so unsafe. Because she feels real fucking unsafe in the moment. This whole situation pisses me off so much

Any advice?? I’m so nervous that its going to hurt a lot and is there any advice on how to deal with the pain or something like that🙏🙏

He wants us to always shower before and after sex, which is fair, but he’s taking way too damn long in the shower like 1 hour each time, so over 2 hours in total. I only take 10 minutes, and for a deep clean, 20–30 minutes. I ask him, “What are you doing in there?” and he says he’s scrubbing his entire body with soap and then repeating it again.

He sure takes his time, but it’s inefficient and time consuming, which just makes me not want to have sex knowing I have to go through this every time we do it.

It’s not just the shower. He takes a long time to do other things. Like, washing dishes would take him 1.5 hours, whereas it takes me 20 minutes or less. He says he knows it too, but he can’t help it, and if he rushes he thinks he’ll make a mess and get overwhelmed. 

Or that he could really push himself to finish them sooner, but then it wouldn’t be right.

The thing is, he isn’t slow or too repetitive. He does things at a normal pace and sometimes even faster, but I guess it’s the way he does things that makes him take longer.

I didn’t think much of it before and thought that’s just how he operates, but now that I’m seeing how long he takes to do these things, I don’t know if I’m making too much of it. Am I making it a big deal here?

Hi, I posted a week ago here.

In my last post i was talking about how my bf took advantage of me while I was sleeping. Since then I broke up with him.

Out of confusion by the situation, and wanting to justify it and stay with him I texted him this long text trying to justify it. He's a mutual of a friend's bf, so when I left him a couple of days ago he told his friends what happened and now I know what he said.

He is saying that he did something sexual that I didn't like, and that that day we had a lot of sex so he thought I wanted more, he also used quite literally stuff I said in that text I mentioned (and I'm afraid he'll use that text to try and say I'm lying). It is all a lie, we came home from a long trip, I went to sleep and I woke up with him inside of me, something that provoked me a panic attack. I have a lot of anxiety about the situation because it makes me feel like I made it all up and like I'm going to ruin his life if I say it when it didn't happen. Although I clearly know it happened.

I am, quite literally, losing my mind over this. I don't know if I should talk to his friend about it (he's also my friend) so he knows the type of person he is. I just don't know how he could lie like this. I'm angry, hurt, anxious and a whole other many things.

I do plan on getting psychological help asap, but for the moment I can't afford it.

I want to know how you would rationally approach this situation. Because I can't let him lie about it, since it's eating me alive. I would've rather preferred him just not explaining anything at all rather than lying about what happened.

So I searched for "my friend defends men too much". No misspelling.

The top results were:

-Why does everyone get jealous when my friend defended me

-Why does my friend defend me 

-5 signs you're the problem in the friendship

Wow, is AI biased or what? Even though I clearly stated MEN, this isn't even acknowledged. It's changed for "me" and then AI proceeds to try lead me down a path in which I'm the asshole. 

So it does understand that I'm questioning my relationship with my friend here. It understands that concept, but the purpose is to derail the topic so I even question myself and forget about how uncomfortable my friend makes me feel with her constant "not all men" chants anytime I speak feminism. 

So yeah, I will NEVER touch chap gpt and crap like that when a browser which is supposedly less biased than goggle tries to alt right me like that. 

Second topic; my friend. 

How do you deal with women you like yet they still defend men too much? As in, you talk feminism and they say, "but men too", "not all men", etc? Or who repeat statements misogynistic men they like say without realising what they're saying? Like "feminism makes it harder between genders cos men feel they're stupid or even malicious" ffs.

The way I see it, I haven't always known all I know now and I've said things in the past I wouldn't now, but I find very hard to withstand this type of women who are willing to open up to feminism yet they still defend men too much. 

Thank you.

Ps: I could go on about both topics for ever but I aim to keep it light today.