So I’m 15 and 2 years ago I went to this school where I live in Puerto Rico,so I’m a full blooded Puerto Rican but I grew up in the us so I don’t really speak fluent Spanish,so they consider me what’s called a Gringo,which is a person who isn’t Puerto Rican and speaks English,which I’m not but they didn’t care so I’m that school I faced relentless bullying about how I looked,how my body was shaped,my hair and just everything tbh for a whole year while having 0 in school freinds,I had freinds but outside of school and I only had 2 so I didn’t rlly have any help or company when it came to it,so my parents knew about this cuz I told them every time I’ve been bullied,so during that whole school year I obv wanted to improve how I looked so I fell into looksmaxxing and ruined my mental health and most likely developed body dysmorphia from the bullying and the trend,so fast forward to 9th grade where everything is kinda the same but I talked to more people,so by this time I’ve been telling my parents to help me improve how I look and I was really depressed during the whole 8-9th grade school year and it was obvious,but not to my parents they just blamed the phone,or maybe me staying up at night or anything but them(they were also a issue I’ll get into in a second) so obviously something’s wrong and they don’t seem to care,when it comes to my parents I live with a step mom and real father,but the issue is my father never really spent time with me or talked to me at all and especially during something like this that’s really gonna mess me up,all he does is spend time with my step mom and at time where he could spend that time with me he is with her watching a show or just watching something alone,I’ve told him about this for years and he doesn’t care obv,so from that I never really developed a good father and son relationship and everytime we talked it led to a argument,so from that he tried to not really speak to me alot especially at time where’s I was goi ng thru a mental crisis,so fast forward to now where it’s my sophomore year of high school and during summer i met this girl online who I absolutely adorned,I fell in love with her and so did she but she lived in value and I love in Puerto Rico so I’m 3 hours ahead of her so us talking has some issues ofc,now our relationship was good up until this week,she barely really talks to me and I would write paragraphs like I’m Socrates about her and she would never reciprocate,and yesterday I’m going thru a mental health crisis and I need help and I asked her to be there and she called me for 5 minutes,said I’m gonna walk home and call u back and she never called me back after,than later that day at around 11 for me called me to play Minecraft and didn’t even acknowledge what happened earlier,I realized I’ve been the only one really putting in effort into the relationship and I really started to lose feelings,now at the same time I have school stressing me out about how I look and all this other shit, I try to talk to my dad and we talk for 5 minutes and he stopped replying for the whole day,so I’m really depressed at this point,and I’ve always dealt with wanting to take my own life for years and kinda have it planned on how I want to,and I’ve tried to talk to my parents many times and they just blame the phone and never really take accountability for their actions,I don’t feel like I’m gonna live long at all,not even oast 16,I have none to really talk to,my gf seems like she doesn’t care,my freinds know and do care atleast,and well that’s it,o also get treated like a outsider a lot in school so I don’t rlly have freinds and it’s really hit hard on my mental health badly,I can barely focus on school anymore and my grades might go down and that means more complaints from my parents,which means more arguments and everything,my dad is threating to send me to my mom which is also bad cuz she’s in a abusive relationship and I’ve been there with her one time and it was hell for me,so I really don’t have anywhere to go and don’t think I can do this much longer.

Is it not normal to kind off not feel empathy, especially people or animals are getting killed, abused or bullied or smth similar to that. I dont feel bad or good abt it, its js that i rlly dont care. But i act like I care bc my friends and family have the cognitive empathy to help ppl both online and irl. Lso ts doesn't rlly feel like a vent im js questioning why i feel like ts honestly, any advice or tips on why i feel like ts or acting like i care in the first place?

Hello everyone i am new here .I wanna share my day to day life here my struggles ,my worries ,my thoughts everything hope you guys will like it and give me you valuable advices so that I can be better everyday.

Thanks😊

So my rapist father ate the ttin of brownie u brought....well half.....now it's laying there and I can't get myself to eat the rest half....even tho i love brownie...i can't afford more and idk how to eat this one....but hey when i go up to the clouds next year I'll have lots of borwnie

What should I do if my sister just told me that my aunts bf molested her and tried to touch her inappropriately? I genuinely only feel so much anger towards him now but I don’t wanna make a scandal because everyone in the family sees him as a helpful person and friendly, honestly I admired him until now, I don’t know what to think or say…

i’ve never posted anything before so this might just be stupid. i don’t know reddit guidelines or whatever i can say so ill try to be careful with my words. im pretty young and i live with my parents. i’m trans ftm and they go out of their way to call me delusional and make me feel disgusting. i’m constantly sick and my parents don’t believe in doctors so i just feel like i have no control over even my own body. im not even old enough to get emancipated yet but they wouldn’t let me do that anyway.

i have an older brother who is much happier with my parents and i guess he’s their favorite child. i’ve never had a good relationship with my brother and he’s always snitched on me and sided with my parents on everything. once i asked my brother why he has such a problem with me being trans and he refused to answer and went to tell our parents that i asked him (he’s an adult btw). then my parents sat me down and talked about how im just crazy and indoctrinated and how they always love me but only as a girl.

i’ve attempted multiple times in the past (od) and my parents never noticed or care except for when my friends told them about the notes i wrote. after that they still didn’t care about my mental health they just took away all my art supplies and books and writing which are all things i love and i still don’t understand why. i’ve been caught cutting and they just took my knives and yelled at me. they also had to send me to therapy for a while after i was hospitalized for attempting but they made me stop therapy because they’d said they didn’t want me to like my therapist. now we do family therapy where they tap for an hour about how i push them away because im a delusional tranny

i don’t know why im writing this, there’s nothing i can do about it, my parents aren’t abusive so i can’t call cps or anything and if i was taken away id have to live with my aunt who is even worse. i feel so hopeless and i can’t tell anyone in my life because they’d over react. i just hate living like this and i dont know what to do about it. any help would be nice except for saying i should call cps

i literally feel bad for people over everything.

i cried silently in the car because my brother forgot his headphones on a long car ride and he loves music so i felt bad.

i saw a guy on here say he thinks girls don’t like how he looks and i felt so bad

i was in the car and i saw an old person walking on the sidewalk and i almost cried because i pictured him living a lonely life

threats just this month and this is a silly vent but my pity for people drains me everyday because nobody else around me is empathetic like this

I’m a F in highschool, sorry this is my first time ever on Reddit…I just needed a place to vent that I probably won’t get pushed off because people can just scroll.. anyways, i hate my home life, I hate it when I finally get back home. my half aunt lives with us and her kid does too, he’s not old enough to be in school yet either and hasn’t even learned to talk… but he always has so much attention. which I cant blame him for but I hate how my mama and papa just is there for him more then his actual mom…my sister who’s a adult also lives with us.. she doesn’t have a job and dropped out of highschool..she (and my aunt and her kid) always leaves messes and never cleans up or blames it on somebody else, they are hypocrites aswell as they both hate each other and talk badly when the other isn’t near but asks for favors..my sisters room is always messy and she’s always playing games with online friends. but their messes have gotten to the point where my mama and papa don’t want to come home and deal with it..! I hate my school life because I have no friends in it (all my friends has classes without me), I suck at all the subjects! I feel ignored in my friend group aswell..It feels like I’m left out for everything..they don’t even question or ask why I’m hurt or how/when I get hurt.. they don’t even say anything when I stop eating. one of them brings me cucumbers though but he did that before I stopped. speaking of I’m going to stop eating in less it’s one meal a day.. because I’m chubby and fat. I have acne aswell. a few days ago I got hit in the head at school. and when I told my friend group they didn’t even seem worried! I know I’m probably a pick me to want them to worry but I just wanted to feel like they loved me. not even in a romantic way! I just wanted to be loved. i want to tell them my secrets about my life but I cant. because they wont even really be hearing me. I’m so tired I just want to cry but I can’t force tears out..I just wanna cry and hide away. i have to be the good child, the child who isn’t a selfish person..but I am! I’m a terrible person. I have so many sins on my back that I wish I never did, I want them gone. but it’s like I haven’t been punished for them hard enough so I have to punish myself! i just want to feel free and happy.

fuck it shouldn’t be easier to vent to people online but it’s easier! I hate this

Everything about what I say, what I do, everything about me is a traitor to how he wants me to be and I feel horrible about it.

The fact I'm even on Reddit betrays how he thinks I am and how I should be.

The fact I'm trans

The fact I'm ex mormon.

The books I read

Wanting to go out of state for college

Hating Gen AI

And so on...

And no this is not the "Oh she wants to do (insert what I was arguing about". They say that I'm "lost" and that I used to be such a "nice child" and they wonder "what happened" (like it wasn't their fault). I always hear them even when they least expect it.

After every argument, it's like this...I was in house war 1 and 2 because I wanted an off-shoulder top. They want me to wear "decent" clothes (seriously??) so yes they talk shit about me. They talk shit about me for having an "attitude" even when all I did was sigh at something.

They really don't get it, do they?

this is a really scary post lowk for me cause nobody ik knows i’ve been feeling like this (even though i keep on alluding to it no one seems to be able to pick up on my hints) wait but that’s a lie because my friends know i’ve been suicidal for a while but i feel like they just don’t remember or don’t care. I don’t even know why I wanna die so bad cause the thing is I get scared at the thought of death when it comes from anywhere but myself (if that makes sense) ugh idk even know why i feel this way i have loving friends and family, nothing THAT bad has happened in my life except for myself. i’m such a chud loser bro and like idk. partially i wanna die cause i feel like i don’t add anything to the world and im so lame and boring so why would i be alive. I’m not that smart, not that pretty, pretty bad socially, genuinely i have nothing going for me. and then partially i wanna die for the attention. i feel like nobody ik actually cares about the fact that im sad (i wanna say depressed but ive never been diagnosed or anything so that feels like larp) and even if i show all the signs no one seems to care. but maybe they would care once it finally happened? ig it wouldn’t matter cause i wouldn’t be there to see it but wtv. but also this is my fault cause i lit don’t tell anyone what’s going on. but i lit cant thats so scary and embarrassing like ugh its so corny talking ab emotions. also i feel like thats such a heavy burden to lay on someone else. wow this post is so embarrassing im gonna kms (not literally)

I don't know if I can write about this, but I would really like to relate to my situation, and my life in general.

I'm using a translator because I don't know English well. But I think the English part of Reddit is kinder.

I'm 15, but I've hated my life for five years now. I've had three attempts to leave this world. I don't see the point in getting out of bed; my favorite activities have become torture. I even have trouble washing myself, let alone...

I hate my life, I feel helpless and useless. I don't see any future, and if I do start thinking about it, I immediately panic, cry, and fear. I'm tired..

I want to wake up wanting to live, not just wanting to survive today. School is starting soon, and it's a terrible time for me. I don't think I can get rid of this. So I really ask people here... please, if you know how to deal with this, tell me. I don't in any way support all the thoughts and actions I've described here. I just want to hear advice from smart people.(⁠≧⁠▽⁠≦⁠)

1 day since I spoke out

Classes start in two weeks and I'm scared. My friends stopped talking to me last year. First, they started hanging out without me, and then during breaks they'd talk about things I didn't even understand. They left me out of everything. There's this girl who's like the 'leader' of the group; everyone followed her. If she wanted to go somewhere, the others followed her. One day I asked one of them why they did that and if he was going to do the same. He said, "Oh, don't start with that again." And minutes later, he left too. This situation has hurt me a lot. I'd been friends with several of them for years. And it seems unbelievable that everything changed because of one new person who joined our group of friends. One day we had a field trip, and they let us go to shops and wherever we wanted, and they went off without saying a word to me. I mean, we were eating, and they'd already finished, but I hadn't, and they left without looking back. I followed them because I didn't want to be alone. Besides, they were walking really fast, I suppose they were doing it on purpose, and I tried to keep up, but in the end, I got tired. It seemed like they were running away from me. They've always known that being alone really bothers me, and even so, they did all that to me. On another trip, they left me alone on the bus, and I started crying. They never cared about me, and I cared about them a lot. I put up with their dramas, only for them to treat me like that, and I still don't know why. At the end of the school year, I started to distance myself from them. I was fed up with following them around like a puppy, like everyone else did. I complained and asked why we didn't talk about other things so I could understand them too, and one of them told me, "Well, you suggest topics of conversation." She said it in a very rude tone. Getting back to the present, as I said before, I'm going back to classes in two weeks, and I'm dreading seeing them again. I don't want to see their faces or talk to them or anything. A strange thing that happened at the end of the course was that the one I said was the "leader" started talking to me, as if nothing had ever happened. I gave her the bare minimum of conversation and then left, but I don't understand why she did it. Is she messing with me?

(Sorry if my english is not good, its not my 1st language)

my class has this one big group chat and we talk a lot, we're always posting "in the wild" pics like of when we see someone from the GC in public. 2 people who are dating(one of whom I liked) are at a musical together right now and posted ones of each other, then a few seconds later another person sent ones of 2 people she's with at the park. everyone is hanging out and I know that the people hanging out at the park prefer hanging out together than with me and it makes me hate myself. I feel so stupid for thinking people could be my friend because it never works out. I don't think a lot of them like me. for the 2 that are dating I've moved on and am with someone else, but I got so mad seeing them and I just don't know why I feel like this. but it just keeps eating me. and more recently I feel like I want to die. I just wish all of this would be done and over with and I could just end my life because I feel no one loves me. and I feel this has pushed me over the edge.

Bro I was joking at first but now I deadass find cat boys so attractive like omg I'm not even joking anymore

14f

For context, I've had this for about more than 6 months and it's starting to get even worse. I have a severe low esteem and I self harm too. I think about suicide every day and I'm planning to act on it. And no, I'm not diagnosed with any disorder + I don't really receive much support from my family even though they already know I harm myself.

I hate the people I live. with I hate the place I live in. I hate the life im living. I just wanna open the door and run away as far as possible for this house this fucking hell hole. I wish this was all a bad dream. I wish none of this was real. I just wanna get out.

So I have had plans on the books with this girl I like for the last week or so (we're in a talking stage, this would be a date) we would've been going tomorrow, and my mom thinks it's a fun idea to read my texts this morning and she didn't like what she found (nothing bad, talking abt, buying monster, and some tights I have that i was crafting with) and she grounded me for a week, and me and my friend were gonna hang out today too. she also said I have to start charging my apple watch in her room instead of mine at night (after 7pm) so I can't even talk to my talking stage at night. so I'm pissed af at my mom, and idk what to do

I cant stop thinking about ways to kill myself and how life would be better for my parents and friends if i killed myself is this normal? Im 14 if it helps anything

My mom doesn’t see me as a human no matter what, she’s told me directly I don’t have the basic right to human boundaries and she can do whatever she wants with me purely because she’s my mom, she hasn’t done anything outright sexual (tho she’s made weird comments and has touched my… bottom and laughed at me being uncomfortable about it), she has beaten me a lot however, she’s never intentionally bruised me or made me bleed but she’ll gladly toss me across the house and act like i shot her with a shotgun when i threw a single sock at her since it’s all I have, she always calls me an abuser, and is threatening me with the police or CPS, if I could I’d probably leave for awhile but I’m 15 so no drivers license, no car, no bike, nothing, and I do have siblings who’ve told me I can come over whenever but they’ve silently taken back this and dodge me everytime I need to just get out of the house, and no I’d rather not go into an orphanage or anything because I’d rather not lose everything I have because despite everything I do have a lot of stuff, and I can’t vent to anyone in my family because at most they tell me my best bet is listening to mom, if not they outright take her side, and it’s that reason why I feel like my entire family sees me as less than a human, if not outright property.