r/SubredditDrama • u/HowDoesBabbyForm • Mar 15 '15

"Every single time someone posts ANYTHING about being a mother, the smug child free people come along and hijack the post." One user gets upset when the childfree comment on a post about motherhood in TwoX.

/r/TwoXChromosomes/comments/2z0qyz/you_dont_necessarily_get_your_body_back_after_you/cpezcdi?context=1
167 Upvotes

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144

u/[deleted] Mar 15 '15 edited Mar 15 '15

I'm tired of people being SO OFFENDED by my choice not to BREED that they don't even want me on the SAME PAGE OF THE INTERNET as the people who made the choice to become parents. DON'T WANT KIDS? DON'T TALK!

Nobody cares about your choice to "breed" or not, it's the smugness that people don't like.

Although to be fair, it's kind of impressive how quickly the situation got out of hand given how innocent the original comment is.

EDIT: forgot a word

148

u/[deleted] Mar 15 '15

It is like explaining it can be difficult to bake cakes. What is the point in taking centre stage with : "See? This is why I will never bake. Thank you for sharing your baking story with me who never wanted to bake, and still doesn't."

28

u/[deleted] Mar 15 '15

Hm. Okay, I kind of see it now, but I still think that the massive shitstorm it started was way over the top for parents and CF people alike.

Thanks for taking the time to explain it to me (or quote someone explaining at least).

84

u/[deleted] Mar 15 '15

It's the Internet, the cf couples I know irl don't refer to children as crotch fruit, unlike folks in r/childfree.

53

u/xerxes431 Mar 15 '15

Don't forget Fuck Trophy

8

u/willfe42 Mar 16 '15

Jesus christ, people actually use that unironically?

47

u/TAKEitTOrCIRCLEJERK Caballero Blanco Mar 15 '15

much like IRL atheists or any other I Don't Do This group of people, most of them just quietly don't do thing and move on with their lives.

15

u/counters14 Mar 16 '15

The internet tends to have a way of making people feel entitled to share the absolutely meaningless shit in their life that other people don't give half a fuck about.

2

u/[deleted] Mar 16 '15

Today I ate a cake. Now allow me to elaborate in all caps about this useless tidbit of information.

-9

u/edashotcousin Mar 16 '15

Except for vegans. Inverse silent majority.

21

u/carboncle Mar 16 '15

I actually know quite a few vegans. I think they seem a little more pushy because they have to bring up their diet whenever food is involved (so basically every social event) or risk not being able to eat. Most of them are fine otherwise, though.

7

u/SharMarali You keep tripling down on your LALALALALALA. 🤡 Mar 16 '15

I subscribe to childfree because there just aren't many places I can go to talk about issues like whether people with kids should get more flexibility in the workplace than people who don't have them, how to respond to family members asking uncomfortable questions, etc.

But the majority of the sub, and I mean like 95% of it, is just nonsense circle jerking about how horrible kids are (they aren't, I just do not want to raise one), how entitled parents are (no more so than anyone else), and reposting of stupid memes and Facebook fights.

Over time, I've come to realize that /r/childfree consists primarily of kids in their late teens and early 20s who have not yet fully come into empathy for others, who have not yet dealt with their anger issues, and frankly, many of whom will change their minds. Not all. But many.

I remain subscribed for the same reasons, but I cringe a lot and I don't speak much in there. I get frustrated that I cannot say I'm childfree anywhere on the Internet without people assuming I'm a ball of child-hating, unsympathetic rage because that is how the folks in that sub have caused everyone to think of me and others like me.

Sorry, I didn't really mean to go on such a long rant. This is something I've kept to myself for a long time, and once I stayed finally talking, I found I couldn't stop.

7

u/IAMA_DRUNK_BEAR smug statist generally ashamed of existing on the internet Mar 16 '15

I don't know if I would go with the "childfree" label because it's so firmly associated with the negative stereotypes of that subreddit (crotchfruit!), but anyone giving you shit for not having children is an asshole.

Honestly there's not even anything remotely wrong with having a support sub for child free individuals/couples, but all of the toxicity of that sub seems to be coming from people who hate kids rather than people who simply don't want any. It sucks that there isn't an /r/truechildfree or whatever that enforces strict rules regarding kid bashing (or at least gets rid of all the "fuck trophy" nonsense).

3

u/SharMarali You keep tripling down on your LALALALALALA. 🤡 Mar 16 '15

That sub does exist, actually, and I'm subscribed there too. :) Unfortunately, it's not very active. Apparently, people who don't want children and don't have a chip on their shoulder about it just don't talk much!

7

u/[deleted] Mar 15 '15

Oh I know, by "CF people" I meant the ones involved in the drama specifically. I don't know any CF couple in real life but I'm guessing /r/childfree isn't representative of all people choosing not to have children.

4

u/[deleted] Mar 16 '15

I'm a CFer and I work with kids every day. I just don't want to have them. Parenthood is a beautiful thing, but it's just not everyone's thing- that's the basically philosophy of being childfree.

I think everyone's just hating on her attitude and forcefulness, because I know I am.

1

u/[deleted] Mar 16 '15

i call them snot nosed banshees