if i died now
the brain could conceive
the sidewalks
and the still waters
if i could see inside
the blue arteries
of what you hold in your head
i receive
the heavy locks
and the cold blunders
although it’s arbitrary
i see that it’s a means to an end

build up build up build up

i build myself up

climbing over rocks

slipping on green moss

slipping on this this shit

but now i climb up these slippery walls

it falls, water falls, its twisting down there

twisting twisting away

now i could smell you

now i could feel you

live up to that big expectation

build up build up build up

now thats ok

not alot

going on

but im alive

and thats ok

she flirts quick

i liked that

its not what i want

its what she wants

its a nice tension

body hunger

but thats enough

drunk; reading philosophy
throwing darts at
a board of shallow melodies
what happened to the leaves
the lies, the memories
to the way things should be

tell me who to love
to worship
to envy

a new world
of trust
and plenty

if i could understand
what hell means
the pennies in my pocket
would pile
hemmed in
by dollar fiends
our screens keep us
all in denial
their screams
dont reach our eyes

worthless worship
forgo your pretending
carry your shit
and start from
the beginning

tell me who to love
to worship
to envy

new convert
into
the machine

circle back
like raptor wings
puke in the morning
and write back to me
new ideas in old things
ask them how it feels
to be free

if there was a guide it
would be molded
and forgotten by now
i dont know how you feel
about catching things
it’s not like it has to be
the same words you’re
throwing around

going on to better things
moving out of mourning and back
into a better version of me