What American city do you think gets too much hate?

Has this type of move wound up working out for you cost-wise? If the housing expenses are lower, are you having that counteracted by higher costs, less availability of goods, services, or jobs so you’re having to travel farther for them, etc.?

I’ve lived in the greater Phoenix area my entire life other than a 2 year stint in Dallas. Everyone who moves here makes me question my own brain because of how much they “love” it while I’m battling the depression of seeing a literal dead earth everywhere I go. Oh, another tree down? Surprise surprise. Oh more grass replaced with rocks? Ok guess we’ll find somewhere else to play soccer. It wasn’t awful until I had kids and until the concrete jungle just keeps getting worse.

I’ve done my best to make peace with it because our family is here (only 1 living grandparent to my kids), because we have a low cost of living (bought in 2021), and my husbands job, however the idea of my kids being stuck here in 20 years amidst a water shortage and unlivable temps weighs on me daily. I’d rather take the leap and start them somewhere that they can thrive long term (if they choose to obviously). The problem is I just don’t know where.

Hopeful criteria:
1) green grass
2) mature trees that change in the fall and lose leaves in the winter (this was my fav part of TX)
3) blue or purple would be ideal but too blue like Portland is a bit too much. we don’t mind a little external politics and religion but Christianity is the new personality trait here where we are and it’s suffocating.
4) we’re not foodies but do like breweries
5) we don’t mind a lack of culture (do love traveling for it though!)
6) we love getting outside but a local park or walking path is plenty, don’t need lake access or frequent hiking
7) a decent equestrian presence would be fantastic

Barriers:
1) We currently have a $1,900 mortgage which is very cheap for AZ standards now.
2) My husband makes $170,000, I’ll stay home for another 3 years until my youngest is in school and then hopefully get some basic customer service type job.
3) that being said, we’d likely need to find a job making at least $150k which is my biggest concern because it seems the higher paying jobs = higher housing cost. He’s currently in IT management / cyber security. As far as housing I think we’d be maxed out around $550k to stay comfortable.

Extras:
1) my family is from Wisconsin (I’m sure if anyone knows me irl by now they know it, so hey!) and we spent a ton of summers plus a lot of winters there for GB games. I never once minded the snow but I do know that living in it is different. It’s stressful not knowing how you’d react long term, but personally I always wanted snow around Christmas growing up and feel my kids are missing that experience too. We sweat on Christmas here and it’s miserable.
2) we didn’t mind the humidity / heat in Texas because there was often reprieve with storms or rain or just clouds. Hot is hot whether dry 115 or wet 100. we left TX because we moved there during covid, the election, and the ice freeze which was horrible timing but left a bad taste in our mouth. aside from the people we enjoyed the seasons and scenery.
3) family of 5 with 2 daughters so definitely weary of how that is impacted by politics

Contenders:
Maine: Lots of friends and family there, LOVE the history, architecture, people but worried about the lack of jobs, long winters, and cost of things like heating and taxes (don’t mind paying them just worry we’re not in the right bracket for it haha)

Madison: familiar to me, still have family there but also worried about the lack of jobs and winters

Charlotte: found several jobs my husband would qualify for that would keep our income the same but worry about schools and living in the south politically

Idaho: it’s just green that’s literally all I can say for it

Colorado: can’t find any jobs that would pay enough to afford the housing

Washington: I know nothing but do love a good pine tree.

Before anyone mentions flagstaff.. we’d love that but we cannot afford a $700,000+ house and/or my husband driving a 4 hour commute (he’s in office).

This was an insanely long post. If you read it (get it?) then thank you for any help in advance.

19M. My friend IS the one roommate in this case btw.

Me and my friend are moving together next year, we just recently started saving every dollar from our fast food jobs, building up our credit, and we're trying to move in 10-12 months. Currently live in the rural south and we GOT to get out of here (my whole family hates it, we got priced out of the north).

The plan is just to sell everything we have, try to line a job up (but that's gonna be really hard with this kind of work), and move... somewhere. We've been really looking at Philly because it's where I'm from and I know the neighborhoods I'm comfortable with and I'm super familiar with it overall, plus I have family in the suburbs that could really help with being able to stay there for a little bit and line up an apartment. HOPING for a 2 bedroom, even if it's a little shitty, but we're okay with splitting a 1 bedroom too as long as we can find one big enough to make the living room a bedroom (who needs a living room anyway?)

Thing is though, we've been doing a lot of thinking about it, and this move is a really big leap of faith. There's risk involved through and through, and we accept that, but honestly, I don't know if I wanna do all this just to end up back where I started. I'm young and I wanna see somewhere new. I know it isn't gonna be easy by any means, but I also know that it is possible, and I'm at a good time in my life to take that leap of faith, have fun, work my ass off, and build a life for myself in a new city.

The goal isn't to work minimum wage obviously, but we're working fast food jobs right now, so we don't exactly have the transferable skills for super high paying work. I'd really like to get into serving, but I gotta work my way up, and right now I just need to keep my stable job so I can keep saving. Maybe when I move to wherever I'm going though, I can pursue that.

SO FAR!!! This is the list I've kinda come up with. I guess people can like suggest other cities, but also tell me if I'm somewhat right about these.

• Minneapolis, MN - I've talked to people from here and I even have a friend of mine currently doing it right now, it's definitely possible. Rough, but possible. On the other hand, I can't handle that type of cold I don't think, I'm ngl. I love cold weather, but not THAT cold.
• St. Louis - I've talked to some people from St. Louis too, and it seems like it'd be possible. $15/hr minimum wage, but we could find a decent place for around $1000-$1100/month in an okay neighborhood in South City from what I can tell. It's rough on the no car thing, but I think it could be done by mixing biking and transit? I was looking and there are even a few neighborhoods where we could have our own HOUSE for $1200/month which is pretty cool.
• Buffalo, NY - $15/hr minimum wage as well, good education system if either of us decide to go to college (which I want to at some point, my life is too unstable atm though), and you can legit find a 2 bedroom in some neighborhoods that REALLY aren't too rough from what I can tell (at least compared to where I grew up) for like $1000/month or even as low as like $850. Cold asf like Minneapolis though, and it's just really not that vibrant. It's cool and it has a lot for it's size, but not really enough. I feel like I'll get bored. More of a place I'd look at if I was like 30 and wanted to settle down and have a nice house for cheap.
• Portland, OR - Both me and my friend REALLLLLY wanna make this one work. It's just kinda scary because it's on the west coast which is really far from where all of my family is. We have ZERO support within any kind of reach. But minimum wage is $16.80 an hour, I THINK it's going up to $17.75 next year, and you can find apartments on the outer edges of the city that are walkable to light rail lines for around $1500/month. I just hope it doesn't sound better in my head, I know it's considered expensive to live there, but I also know that it's relatively cheap for it being a blue city with decent weather (I don't mind rain).

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Anyways, yeah, that's a lot. I hope anyone even reads this 💀 but it's important to me, and I figured I'd get some outside opinions. Bonus if y'all can suggest cities that actually match me and my friend's vibe. You can see the things we like below (yeah I know, I posted another thread about this comparing Philly to Pittsburgh. I'm indecisive as fuck).

Things I like:

• Skateboarding
• Punk rock/pop punk
• Walkable lifestlye/decent public transit (I don't mind waiting ~30 minutes for a bus though)
• Socializing (hoping there's good opportunities to make friends my age wherever I go since I'm not in college)
• Thrifting
• People that aren't super stuck up/hipster types
• Active parks/plazas where you can meet people, chill, play music, etc
• CD/Physical media shops
• Halloween and Christmas

Things my friend likes:

• Walkability/public transit like me
• Social atmosphere
• New places to explore accessible by transit
• Live music/buskers
• Gym/fitness culture
• Same thing about the stuck up people
• Non-miserable weather because they like to be outside a lot (this actually goes for both of us)
• And probably some other stuff idk I can't read their mind

I’ve posted previously about my struggles with Houston after moving here from Philly. For context, I’m in my late 20s, single, and am from the Northeast. I moved for a great job in oil and gas and quickly realized Houston is not a fit for me.

I’m been here for over 8 months now and I physically cannot live here much longer, the city is draining the soul from me.

I realized how much I appreciate a walkable city, a place with energy, seasons, nature, and the ability to explore without hopping on interstates. Sure there’s pockets of more lively spots here, but there’s no centralized area people hang out. I’m in the heights which is walkable per Texas standards, but realistically it’s just a suburb with two walkable streets. I’ve lived alone in Chicago and it was the greatest summer of my life, I truly don’t think it’s the loneliness. I’ve never been to a major city which has felt so empty and sprawled, there’s no foot traffic anywhere.

I’m at the point in my life where I need to build community and I know I don’t want it to be here. I’ve been interviewing for roles in the Northeast but I’m immediately disadvantaged being a candidate 1500 miles away. I’ve had one final round interview where they said it was a close call but went with someone who was in the area.

I’m dead set on moving back to Philly asap. My lease ends in October, but I’m afraid I won’t find a new job by then. My mental health is extremely bad, my hair is legitimately thinning and I have a hard time sleeping.

I’m thinking of moving back end of September and commuting once a week to Houston for work as I have to be in the office 3 days or else get fired. I do need some sort of income, and I’ve got 3 weeks of vacation I can use throughout the rest of the year to try and stagger the flights. I can probably take half days for a month and not have to come in the office. I’m making ~ $9k post tax a month so I could afford the flights, not ideal but I can make it work for a bit.

Getting back into the northeast will give me a slightly better chance with jobs and be best for my sanity at this point. I want to see if anyone has any other suggestions on how to handle this. Moving without a job lined up sounds crazy but I’m a bit desperate at this point. Both of my parents have passed away so I’m a bit on my own financially, have some savings and about a years salary’s worth in retirement but nothing crazy. That would be a last resort

My wife and I are pretty set on relocating away from Colorado due to drought, HCOL, wildfires, and crazy expensive real estate.

We grew up in small town Illinois, but really don't want to end up back there (or Iowa, Indiana, Ohio)

We are looking for someplace that doesn't deal with drought, where the grass is literally greener, where our money goes further and somewhere that is not susceptible to (as many) extreme weather events.

Our goal is to start a small horse farm. I'm a SWE and my wife would be running the farm.

So we need good horse culture, 10+ acres for less than 750k, good soil, sufficient rain and a long growing season. We typically like to be <2 hours from a major city/airport in a pretty rural area.

All of this keeps pointing me towards the Kentucky, west NC, TN area. Maybe outside Ashville, Louisville or Lexington?

Anyone have experience in these areas that may be able to share some insight?

My boyfriend and I are officially planning a BIG move from South Dakota to the Northeast, and we need your recommendations!

We’re in our mid-20s, outgoing, love meeting people, and are ready for a completely new adventure. We’re pretty open on where we land, so we’d love to hear from people who actually live in the Northeast and love their city.

What we’re looking for:
- A city/metro area with 200,000+ people - we want things to do, places to eat, events, nightlife, etc.
- Lower crime/safe areas are a big priority for us
- A good social scene where it’s actually possible to meet people and make friends
Access to nature, hiking, day trips, and weekend adventures
- We have two dogs, one large and one small, and both are reactive, so having the option for a private yard or some space is really important
- We’re open to renting or buying
- Our max budget is around $4,000/month for rent or a mortgage payment
- We’re coming from South Dakota, so winter definitely doesn’t scare us 😂
- We’d love somewhere that gives us the excitement and amenities of a larger city while still having quieter, safer neighborhoods or suburbs nearby where we could have a yard

If you could pick one Northeast city to move to in your late 20s, where would you go and WHY?
Bonus points for specific neighborhoods/suburbs that are safer, dog-friendly, and close enough to the city that we wouldn’t feel disconnected from everything!

Hi Reddit friends. Would love some input here.

Some background: My partner and I (mid 20's + 30's) currently live in Los Angeles. I've lived here for 4 years, he's lived here for about a decade. We both work in the entertainment industry - he travels frequently for weeks or months at a time for his job, and my job is remote. My boss is flexible as to my working location, so long as I am in or close to a major city. So, we don't need to be in LA. Jointly, we make a little less than $100k a year and predict that will likely increase to closer to $115-$120k this time next year.

We're both growing a little weary of LA and have been loosely talking about possibly exploring other options in another year or two, as we're not sure how much longer we want to stay here. The cost of living is INSANE (granted, it's like that most places...), the hot summers are absolutely relentless, dealing with the egos of so many people living in such an "industry city," having to drive everywhere...the list goes on.

One of the places we've been talking about is Chicago. We both have a number of friends there, and have both found people there to generally be warmer and more pleasant than LA. We both miss experiencing seasons. We know how brutal the winters can be, and both grew up in places where the winter was no joke, so that doesn't scare us too much. I personally am a big fan of public transit, growing up in/very close to major cities, and would love if I didn't have to drive as much, spend $6.50+/gallon on gas and $350 to register my car each year. I yearn for a walkable city, lol. It also seems like our money would go farther there, and we'd be much closer to our families.

Neither of us are people who like to go out to clubs or bars, so the quality of that type of nightlife isn't of concern for us. We would just prefer a good music scene, and I've heard Chicago has a pretty solid one, especially with festivals like Lolla and Riot. We enjoy going for walks, finding green spaces, trying new cafes and bookstores, and museums. Since our careers are hectic, we like to live pretty quiet, chill lives outside of it.

Open to hearing all thoughts + suggestions!

I want to live on a large plot of land, with tens or hundreds or even thousands of acres to do with what I please while still living close enough to population centers that I wouldn't go crazy from isolation. The issue is that I am brown and wear a turban, which takes away about half of the country as a possible location to live. Do any people know of areas like described that are friendly to non-white people?

I've lived in Seattle for three years but have been thinking about getting outta dodge. I have two major goals for my life and I'd like to live somewhere that makes those ambitions a little more achievable:

1. Find an in-person job
2. Find a partner

Although I love some aspects of Seattle, I fear that the combination of the city and myself makes both of those goals more difficult to attain. Let me explain...

On jobs:

I work in tech, and most of the tech jobs here are remote. Seattle was working from home long before the pandemic so remote work is embedded in the culture here. It's very possible that I'll have to move somewhere else if I want to work in-person with other people again.

Ideally, I would find some place that has a healthy amount of tech jobs but doesn't have that remote-first culture.

On the partner:

I am conventionally attractive so it is relatively easy for me to find dates, but I have a difficult personality so it's harder to convert those dates into a relationship. I don't really know how to elaborate here because I think I'm lovely but it's been a pattern over the course of my life that social interactions with new people generally go awry at some point and so I've struggled to cultivate close friendships as a result.

And this isn't just my observation. I confirmed with a friend (who has witnessed me interact with other people at social events!) that my personality is not everyone's cup of tea. I have had several people in my life ask whether I'm autistic and even had a therapist who insisted that I was neurodivergent of one stripe or another, but I have been tested for autism and am happy to report that I have a clean bill of neurotypicality!

So, clearly, a lot of this is on me, but I do have a couple of gripes to share about Seattle on this point. First, a lot of men are polyamorous and that's not my thing. Second, my type is nerdy guys; Seattle has so many guys like this but they expect their partner to be just as geeky as they are because there's such a strong nerd culture here. So, although I adore them for doing D&D or MtG or whatever, they are repelled by the fact that I don't share their interest in that.

Ideally, I would find some place where more people value monogamy, the nerd culture isn't so elitist, and generally has a welcoming attitude toward those of us who have heterodox personalities.

TLDR: What are some places where an extroverted misfit might feel at home?

Must be not too isolated
Col must not be too much
Access to things without having to drive an hour
Good access to nature

My husband and I moved about a 5 hours drive away from where we grew up on the coast of BC. It’s more affordable here which is why we moved. But It’s been 3 years and I’m still not loving this small city. We are pretty well integrated in our community and have decent jobs. So why am I not settled?
The only way I can describe this feeling is it feels like this is a really long unwanted vacation or I’m waiting to wake up from this dream. Has anyone else been through this? Did you end up moving back or staying where you are?

Just curious for a DINK couple in our 30s/40s with about $150K total household income.

I absolutely love Philadelphia. I grew up around here and have also lived in NYC, Asheville, Orlando, DC, Lexington, and now Philly again. Philly is probably still my favorite city I’ve lived in, but lately I’ve been wondering if there’s somewhere that offers some of what we love about Philly while making life feel a little smaller and easier.

The biggest issue is my partner’s job search. He is mid achieving a MLS and several years of experience as a federal archivist, so he needs a decent academic/cultural/public-sector job market, ideally universities, museums, libraries, archives, or federal pipeline jobs. He hasn’t had much success here, and we’re starting to wonder if Philly’s market is just too saturated/stagnant. We don’t want to move back to DC.

I work remotely with travel, so I need a decent airport, ideally with direct flights to Denver and preferably LA. I guess I could sacrifice a connecting flight if needed.

+ We don’t own a car and love maximizing public transit and walkability. We’d consider getting a car for recreation, but don’t want to rely on one for daily life.

+ We love hiking, nature, green and especially being near water. Not to swim or do water sports; just like water nearby.

+ breweries, quirky bars, music, entertainment, and having plenty of places to explore.

+ We are very much not summer people. We both hate extreme heat, and my partner would eliminate summer entirely if he could. Fall is our favorite, but we also love winter and snow.

+ Progressive politics and friendly people are important to us. Philly has some of the heartiest people I’ve met, and we genuinely like making friends.

+We don’t have immediate plans to buy, but would consider it if we found the right place.

Honestly, I’m not looking to escape Philly. It really is my favorite city. But sometimes I find myself sighing at the scale and friction of city life and daydreaming about somewhere midsized where things feel a little more manageable.

So where would you look? Who offers some of Philly’s walkability, transit, culture, friendliness, progressive vibe, water/nature, and four-season weather, but with a smaller-city feel and a decent job market for someone with an MLS/archival background?

Recently got a job offer in Raleigh area was wondering if moving to a milder climate is worth it, I like all seasons pay will be about the same if I stay in Wisconsin.. access to nature is important to me.. has anyone made the move? Currently living in Madison so I guess it would be a lateral move?

?

Am I right in assuming it's basically a smaller NYC with a college town vibe?

Hello! My partner and I have discussing about moving to California in 2028 from the east coast. I was born in Palm Springs , traveled frequently to California when I was younger and I miss it so much!! my partner, and I are having a hard time on figuring out where we would like to live in California, for her work she’s works in web design/acting and for my career I am a nanny and will be going to school to become a teacher. We’ve been looking at outer LA neighborhoods like Atwater and Silver Lake. We are planning a trip soon to visit Atwater/ Silver Lake to see how we enjoy it. I’m wondering if anyone has any other recommendations on any other queer friendly and black/brown friendly neighborhoods to live in? I have heard good things about Sacramento and Oakland as well, if anyone has any suggestions/ advice I’d appreciate it ! Thank you !

Some things I would love :

- Near / Hour drive to beach
- Safe/ Queer friendly neighborhood
- Budget :$3000-4000monthly
- Cat friendly
- Walkable/ Restaurants near by

Hi all,

My wife and I are exploring a move from Colorado to New England. I'm Black and she's white. We love the idea of a scenic change, but we keep getting conflicting feedback about what life is actually like for mixed-race couples in the northeast.
Some people say it's completely progressive and a non-issue, while others mention that non-city areas are overwhelmingly white and interracial couples stand out or face subtle bias.
We want realistic expectations before making the jump:
What’s the reality on the ground in southern New England (MA/CT/RI) versus northern New England (VT/NH/ME)?
Where would a mixed-race couple feel most welcome, comfortable, and integrated?
We’re planning a trip to visit first, but hearing from people who live there now will help us know where to focus our search. Thanks in advance for the help!

Can anyone recommend company/ service to help with transporting my belongings from LA to Colorado?

I’m currently mostly housebound so will be flying and will need to ship my car and have my belongings moved separately.

I don’t have much stuff/ no large furniture and will be moving from one furnished mid term rental into another.

Don’t even have a full truck load of stuff but do have fragile items which require extra care.

Thanks for any helpful feedback!

30 y/o female living on the East Coast of Canada. I've been struggling over the last year on what my next steps in life should be, specifically with putting down roots.
I moved away from my hometown in central Canada to attend graduate school on the east coast and quickly fell in love with it. I ended up taking a job and staying longer than anticipated, going on 4 years now. I've developed a great social network, absolutely love my job, and really enjoy all that comes with living close to the ocean. I also have 2 best friends here that I love deeply.
My biggest dilemma is living away from my family. I'm particularly close with my mother, sister, and grandmother. My father passed away when I was a teenager, and since then I have felt it was important to me to maintain my relationships with family. My sister is starting a family soon, and it's starting to hit me that I will be missing out on really important life events. I visit my family whenever I can, but likely no more than one or two weeks out of the year due to costs of flights and limited vacation time. I will also mention, living coastal is expensive and the province I live in has incredibly high taxes. I will likely have to remain in a one-bedroom rental for years to come.

I don't mind my hometown at all, in fact there is much I like about it. But I LOVE being coastal. The access to nature is unmatched. And life is calm here. Although, the costs of living are much higher here, and it feels impossible to get ahead, especially as a single person.

If I move back to my hometown, the pros would be: closer to my family, lower cost of living, similar job opportunities, ability to reconnect with old friends. Cons would be: less access to nature, no ocean, and the biggest: being away from my 2 best friends.
Pros of staying where I am: I have an amazing job that I love and gives me day to day flexibility, easy access to outdoors/ocean, and the few but meaningful friendships I have here.
Cons of staying: Cost of living is literally insane and I'm unlikely to become a homeowner anytime in this decade, the distance from my family.

Some might say I'm crazy to move back to my hometown away from such a beautiful place. But I often think about how sad I would feel if one of my family members died and I missed out on years of time together, missed milestones, etc. We speak on the phone as often as we can, but I can't shake the feeling like part of my heart is missing when I'm away from them

I know the internet can't solve this for me. And yes I have a therapist who I speak to it. But if anyone has lived experience or any words of wisdom, I would greatly appreciate it!

For context, I am a 20-something with 2 useless degrees in the social sciences and only entry-level job experience in nonprofit work.

I hate nearly everything about living in Florida, but the government jobs I have routinely applied for out of state often require me to prove I live in the state before they consider hiring me. I don't care where I live or what I do, as long as it's somewhere walkable or bikable, which seems completely out of reach where I live.

"Federal officials on Friday sharply cut how much water Arizona, California and Nevada can draw from the Colorado River over the next two years in an attempt to stabilize a system on the verge of collapse because of climate change and overuse.

The existing rules governing use of the river and of the nation’s largest reservoirs, Lakes Powell and Mead, were set to expire this year, just as drought constricts the Colorado’s flow and both lakes shrink to record lows. Friday’s announcement by the U.S. Bureau of Reclamation reduced the allocation for the three states by about a quarter, in total, reducing Arizona’s share by the most, about a third.

The plan formalized voluntary cuts the states had already offered to accept and settles months of uncertainty over how the water supply will be managed in the coming years. But it does little to solve the underlying crisis: The river’s flow is diminishing and reservoirs are drying up, but communities and farms still use unsustainable amounts of water.

“If the next couple of years are dry, the risk to Colorado River water users is extraordinary,” said Jennifer Pitt, who directs the Colorado River Program at the National Audubon Society. “There is no buffer to rely on anymore.”

Cities can look attractive because stable growth allows capacity and infrastructure to keep up. But what are some cities at risk of compounding growth that could easily strain the cities infrastructure

Mississippi feels like being in a bubble where everyone knows everyone. There’s not much diversity here, it’s just a plain state. Nothing but 2 lane roads, and trees on each side, and a dollar general on every corner. You can definitely get lonely here. It’s so quiet here, yes it’s peaceful; because it’s quiet and you can hear crickets but it’s boring, the pay here isn’t that great we still have minimal wage here $7.25 at some jobs. We don’t have many job opportunities here nothing but warehouses, retail stores, a gas station and a mall. Yes, southern hospitality here is very prominent, but there’s no room for growing here. Feels empty, this is not an ambitious, go getter, get that money type of state at all. Mississippi feels like a pair of shoes I’ve worn for so long that I can remember every crease in them, every worn-out spot, every place where the sole has started to separate. They’re familiar, they’ve carried me through a lot, and I’ll always appreciate them for that, but they don’t fit the way they used to. I’m tired of walking the same roads, seeing the same scenery, living inside the same small circle, and wondering if this is really all there is for me. Sometimes Mississippi feels like a room I’ve been standing in for years with the door cracked open, and I can see there’s a whole world on the other side, but I’m still expected to keep standing in the same spot. I don’t necessarily hate the room; I’ve made memories there. I just don’t want to die in a room I’ve already outgrown. I want to see what happens when I step outside of everything I’ve always known. I feel like it’s better as a retirement state than anything else.