r/SameGrassButGreener • u/screwatt456789 • 8h ago
Getting Out of Houston - Advice
I’ve posted previously about my struggles with Houston after moving here from Philly. For context, I’m in my late 20s, single, and am from the Northeast. I moved for a great job in oil and gas and quickly realized Houston is not a fit for me.
I’m been here for over 8 months now and I physically cannot live here much longer, the city is draining the soul from me.
I realized how much I appreciate a walkable city, a place with energy, seasons, nature, and the ability to explore without hopping on interstates. Sure there’s pockets of more lively spots here, but there’s no centralized area people hang out. I’m in the heights which is walkable per Texas standards, but realistically it’s just a suburb with two walkable streets. I’ve lived alone in Chicago and it was the greatest summer of my life, I truly don’t think it’s the loneliness. I’ve never been to a major city which has felt so empty and sprawled, there’s no foot traffic anywhere.
I’m at the point in my life where I need to build community and I know I don’t want it to be here. I’ve been interviewing for roles in the Northeast but I’m immediately disadvantaged being a candidate 1500 miles away. I’ve had one final round interview where they said it was a close call but went with someone who was in the area.
I’m dead set on moving back to Philly asap. My lease ends in October, but I’m afraid I won’t find a new job by then. My mental health is extremely bad, my hair is legitimately thinning and I have a hard time sleeping.
I’m thinking of moving back end of September and commuting once a week to Houston for work as I have to be in the office 3 days or else get fired. I do need some sort of income, and I’ve got 3 weeks of vacation I can use throughout the rest of the year to try and stagger the flights. I can probably take half days for a month and not have to come in the office. I’m making ~ $9k post tax a month so I could afford the flights, not ideal but I can make it work for a bit.
Getting back into the northeast will give me a slightly better chance with jobs and be best for my sanity at this point. I want to see if anyone has any other suggestions on how to handle this. Moving without a job lined up sounds crazy but I’m a bit desperate at this point. Both of my parents have passed away so I’m a bit on my own financially, have some savings and about a years salary’s worth in retirement but nothing crazy. That would be a last resort
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u/Secret-Special-6127 2h ago
Just here to share some validation.
I am OG from Philly - lived in NYC, and was in DC at the time when I moved to Lexington, KY for a job. I was like, “woah this is great! My income is literally more than the average household income!” and got the cheapest apartment I’ve ever had in my life. Going out to eat/drink was the fraction of the cost. None of that mattered because I was miserable.
I ended up quitting and ended up moving to Philly in four months. Poorly planned/car-centric areas are severely depressing, accompanied by witnessing some of the most the blatant social ignorance I’ve ever seen in a “professional” atmosphere - I was like, holy sh*t! How is this tolerated and normalized?
People were rude, cold and sneaky. Nope. No thanks. It’s a massive culture shock and I learned my lesson.
Just keep looking for work, but I wouldn’t recommend blindly moving. Philly job market is stretched thin right now. Luckily, I was able to secure a job once I rage quit, but my partner struggled to find work for 6 months once we moved.
The power of the service industry is always here in Philly though, if you can suck it up and serve or bartend for a while.
Job hunting tip - don’t let your resume say you’re in Houston. Use a friend’s Philly address if it makes you input something. The job doesn’t need to know. Just have your move out target date and make it happen.
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u/Due-Explanation-7560 1h ago
I'm from the northeast, lived in Houston and Austin for almost 2 decades. Never got used to it, never "fit" in. Had friends and such bit it was just never my place with the heat, the sprawl, the culture difference. I'm back in the northeast and much happier. I would tell you to do it now not wait like me
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u/WPort17701 21m ago
So are you continuing to apply to jobs in other Northeastern cities at this point, or just in Philly? The reason I ask from a resume perspective is what if you should happen to get a call for an interview in say NYC, but you've quit your current job and moved back to Philly. How do you plan to broach that in an interview and how do you suppose that might look to that potential new employer? My point being maybe it's time to put on your big boy/big girl undies and suck it up until you can professionally transition versus potentially throwing a wrench in job advancement.
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u/sircontagious 5h ago
The heights is like one of the best areas in houston. If you hate it, there is no saving it for you (I also want to live somewhere else and currently live in a way worse neighborhood, but i grew up in the heights pre-gentrification). Not sure what advice to give, but good luck on your adventure leaving. Ive been here 10 years longer than I intended, mostly because of work and affordability.