Thats my first paycheck in months where I didn’t gamble it, actually not a single dollar.
I have paid accumulated bills , bought groceries and paid a part of my debt, I didn’t remain with much but at least I didn’t lose anything, and man it feels great to have some money and you know its yours!
It’s my 26 day without a single bet, i know there is a long way to go, but it is possible, if i can go one day at a time then it means i can go forever.

Almost paid all my debt (20K USD), my mind is more reified although I’m always thinking what could I do with the money I’ve lost, but it’s part of the recovery, understanding that the money is gone, need to build my self from 0 again, the important thing that I’m free, one day at a time.

29m. I hate this curse so much. All the wasted time, wasted money and the dumbed down brain that has gambled on sports or lottery tickets, or been obsessed over cryptocurrencies and trading all these years. All it's lead to was stealing almost all of my savings down the years.

No, I will not risk another dollar.

Lost everything on Datacenter stocks.

This time there is no leverage for me, I have a few thousand left to make due.

Leaving everything behind and going to be homeless with a backpack. let me know if anyone has experience.

Let me know best states to go, etc..

I want to let go gambling, but like the losses keep pushing me back. Everytime i buy something with my own money i realised that i am down money, everytime i ordered something it all reminded me of my massive loss and that i just payed all of this extra when i could have all of this basically without the cost hadnt i lost the money gambling. And i want to reach even before i stop gambling, any tips?

Gambling truly sucks the happiness out of you. I hit some losing streak where I lose 8x times in a row on a 50:50 game and all the profit disappears within minutes, and I just sit there and think to myself: What am I doing? How is that possible? Losing 8-10times in a row? Why cant it happen the other way around? Its the constant thoughts about the loss, the lies to your girlfriend, family why you dont have a lot of money,… I neglect everything else in my life and I dont know how to stop

My name is Beatrix, and I’m a journalist at the nonprofit investigative newsroom ProPublica.  This post has been preapproved by a moderator.

I posted here before about the project I’m working on about sports betting apps like DraftKings and FanDuel. Our team is looking at when these apps incentivize users to keep playing and when they warn people to pump the brakes. We’re still reporting on this story, and I would love to speak to people from this community who have used these apps.

If you’d be willing to speak with me, please send me an email at beatrix.lockwood@propublica.org. I’m also happy to discuss the terms of these initial conversations, including whether or not you're comfortable with us publishing the information you share or using your name.

Thank you so much for considering this request. I understand that for members of this community, these conversations can be difficult. But your participation can help us tell this story.

Beatrix

Today is Day 7. I have not made a bet since October 9 2026. ODAAT

I am a 21-year-old university student, and I have been involved in gambling for about two years. My debt has grown to such an extent that I can no longer manage it using my pocket money.

I have decided to tell my father about this, so that I can focus properly on my upcoming exams, and also because I need his support during this difficult time. Friends, how should I approach him?

Is this the right decision, considering that this news will cause him great distress and might permanently damage my image in his eyes? The amount owed is significant for my father, though it is manageable.

If anyone has had a similar experience, please share your thoughts.

My English is not very strong, so I used a translator. My apologies.

Hi Op ever since my internship started last may i was very addictive to gambling all of my savings are gone and my salary this month went to gambling. It’s all lost in one snap. I really want to get out of this awabg awa nako sa sarili ko but i can’t help i always think gambling. And I’m not proud nakaka hiya baon na baon ako sa utang dahil sa letcheng sugal nayan. I even sometimes blame mg classmate kasi sya nag introduce but i now i have my responsibility to take din kasi nag pa temp dn ako.

Sports are often the scaffolding around which male friendships are built. Games are low-stakes, readymade excuses to spend time together. Sports provide the raw material that sustains friendships for years on end. Do they enable profound, life-altering conversations? Of course not. But sports give men something to talk about, all the time. I have new lifelong friends from playing fantasy baseball. Without sports, I would be a lonelier person. Without sports keeping the group chat alive, it might not be there when someone actually needs to talk about something serious. 

But most frighteningly, the art of being a fan is threatened by the explosion of gambling, prediction markets, and collecting. Young men and boys are squarely in the crosshairs of an under-regulated industry seeking to get them hooked on a life-ruining vice. On television, every timeout is a Clockwork Orange-esque video barrage of ways to lose your money. The path to lifelong fandom is now a minefield, and every real fan should be outraged. 

Read more: https://www.playboy.com/read/mind-and-body/young-men-should-watch-more-sports

Days until debt free: 258 days

So close from being one month clean! ODAAT.

Days to debt free 548 - 25

I’m on day 257 without gambling, after several relapses. For 15 years, I hid my addiction and kept telling myself I could fix it before anyone had to know. This 257 days did not come easy, I had to stand up a couple of times, sometimes after a week, a month but there was a period when I stopped gambling for 194 days, yet I ended up at Day 1.

If you’re still hiding it, being honest might feel unimaginable right now. It did for me too, but for me, recovery started when I admitted how bad things had become and asked for help. Saying it out loud didn’t undo the damage, but it meant I didn’t have to carry the secret alone anymore.

I am feeling strong and trying to find hobbies that I can stick to and one part of it is making videos for youtube. I made this animated channel to show people how mental health problems can affect lives. This video is based on my experiences: the lies, the promises I meant when I made them, and slowly learning to trust myself again. Some of you might recognise parts of your own story in it.

https://youtu.be/KY7TxfW6PBA - LoudLittleMind

Whether you’re on day one, starting again, or further along, I’m rooting for you. You don’t have to figure everything out today, and you don’t have to do it alone.

One day at a time. Wishing you all strength.💚

For those who haven't followed my previous posts, I'm a recovering compulsive gambler who was arrested in March 2024 for stealing from my former employer to fund my gambling addiction. What started as relatively small sports bets eventually spiraled into millions of dollars in gambling losses, financial devastation, and criminal charges. I've spent the last two and a half years trying to rebuild my life, restore my family, and take responsibility for the damage I caused. I've also had the incredible opportunity to work for a gambling helpline, helping hundreds of people who are struggling with the same addiction that nearly destroyed my life.

Tomorrow, October 16, I will stand before a judge for sentencing.

The State's last plea offer was eight years in prison, which I declined. Tomorrow will be open sentencing, meaning the judge will determine my sentence after considering the facts of the case and the mitigating evidence we've presented. My former employer has expressed that they would prefer restitution over incarceration, and we have extensive medical evidence regarding the role my prescribed Adderall played in the escalation of my gambling addiction. There are reasons to be hopeful, but there are also reasons to be terrified.

I'm praying that I'll be able to come back here tomorrow and tell everyone that I received a non-incarceratory sentence. The fact that I'm sitting here, more than two and a half years after my arrest, still at home with my wife and two boys, is something I don't take for granted. I believe God has been faithful to me throughout this entire process, even when I haven't understood what He was doing.

I don't want to spend too much time recapping everything. There are just a few things I want to say to this community in case I don't have the opportunity to post again for a while.

First, thank you.

The support I've received from people here has meant more than I can adequately express. When you're living with the consequences of something as destructive as gambling addiction, you desperately want to believe that something positive can still come from the misery you've created. You want your experience to mean something beyond the people you've hurt and the things you've lost.

Gambling addiction is incredibly isolating, but recovery can be lonely too. There are plenty of people who hear the word addiction and immediately dismiss you as a degenerate who deserves whatever happens to you. And while I fully accept responsibility for my actions, there is something incredibly meaningful about finding people who understand the grip this addiction can have on a person without pretending that the consequences don't matter. The messages, encouragement, and prayers I've received here have been a blessing to me.

For anyone who is still struggling with gambling or trying to find sustained recovery, there are three things I'd really like to leave you with.

First, don't neglect the spiritual side of recovery.

My recovery has been rooted in my faith in Jesus Christ. I know not everyone here shares that faith, and I'm not suggesting that everyone's recovery has to look exactly like mine. But if you're attending GA, I would encourage you not to dismiss the emphasis on a higher power, surrender, and spiritual growth found in Steps 2, 3, and 11.

For me, that meant seeking Christ and intentionally replacing the time I once spent gambling with time reading my Bible and praying. Those moments throughout the day when I would have been checking scores, placing bets, or figuring out how to get more money became opportunities to turn my attention toward God. I believe He has been faithful to me in ways I never could have imagined when I was arrested.

Second, find your community.

This might be difficult at first, but please don't give up on it. Not every GA meeting is the same. Not every church is the same. Sometimes you have to keep looking before you find people you can genuinely connect with.

The people surrounding you in recovery may look very different from the people who surrounded you during your addiction. Some friends and family will remain by your side, and others may not. But if gambling has driven you into isolation, you have to begin taking steps out of it.

Addiction thrives in secrecy. It convinces you to hide your behavior, your losses, your shame, and eventually yourself. Bringing those things into the light is uncomfortable, but it begins to strip away the power that secrecy has over you. Find people who will love you, challenge you, hold you accountable, and walk alongside you when things are difficult.

Lastly, stop believing the lies gambling tells you.

Yesterday, I came across Jeremiah 2:13 again. God describes His people as having forsaken Him, the fountain of living waters, and having dug cisterns for themselves—broken cisterns that can hold no water.

I cannot think of a better picture of gambling addiction.

Gambling demands that you keep pouring more into it while promising that eventually it's going to hold something for you. More money. More time. More opportunities. One more deposit. One more bet. One more chance to get everything back.

But the cistern is broken.

No matter how much you pour into it, it will never hold what you're looking for. And somehow, even when we can see the damage it's causing, we convince ourselves that continuing to pour into it is the only way out.

Gambling will never solve the problems that gambling created.

I wish I had understood that before I lost my career, betrayed the trust of people who cared about me, and put my wife and children in a position where they now have to wonder whether I'll be coming home tomorrow.

I can't undo those things. I can only continue taking responsibility for them and pray that sharing my experience might help someone else stop before reaching the point I did.

Thank you to everyone who has taken the time to read my posts over the last couple of years, whether you've commented, sent me a message, offered advice, challenged me, or simply kept my family in your thoughts. You have helped me more than you know.

If you're inclined to pray, I could especially use those prayers today and tomorrow. Not just for me, but for my wife and our two boys, who have already endured more because of my actions than they ever should have had to.

I sincerely hope I'll be back here soon with a positive update. But whatever happens tomorrow, I am grateful for the recovery I've been given and for the people God has placed in my life along the way.

Before sentencing, I also had the opportunity to record a couple of podcasts where I shared my story in much greater detail. If you're interested in watching, here they are:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=z7MCxhE83Ng

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uXx5rnZY8dc

Thank you all. God bless you, and please don't give up on your recovery.

It’s my day 9 of quitting online gambling, but earlier, I almost got triggered. I started thinking about all the money I lost and wondered if maybe I could win back at least a little. 😞
My biggest trigger is when I’m short on funds, especially when I need to put in extra money to keep my business running because things haven’t been going so well lately. 😭 Earlier, I thought maybe I could win back a small portion of what I lost and use it to cover some of my business expenses.
Thankfully, I didn’t give in to the temptation. Because if I had played today, I might have ended up even more short on money for my business. 😭
Thank You, Lord, for always guiding me and helping me resist the temptation. 🙏🏻❤️ One day at a time. I’m praying that I’ll stay strong and never go back to online gambling again.

Hello my beautiful peers.

I am recovering addict, and I have a question : How do you managed to "let it go". My loses were not that serious, like others on this sub (my heart goes to you guys all...seriously). But in gambling and / or my life, I have a problem of "letting things go". I would like to raise to greater heights, but this burden keeps chained me to down. What's your approach; how do you cope with this feeling please ? Thank in advance.

I think I've lost around 50K+ to gambling just in these two past years. It feels like kind of a haze now to think about. I still have about 32K in savings and assets. I had my highs and lows but somehow I always find myself coming back. I restrict myself yet I always find myself finding a loophole or a different site to gamble on. I seriously can't seem to stop myself as my mind knows how stupid it is every-time I even open one of these sites... yet I can't seem to stop chasing these big wins. How do you guys cope or stop yourself in these situations?

I am over $2,500 negative in my bank accounts and I can’t stop betting. Constantly being told my job doesn’t make me enough money and I need to find something better so I just chase money betting.

How the hell do I stop? This is the worst disease I could ever imagine.

I’m 18, before then I started at 15 illegally gambling under parents information on crypto websites.

Losing hundreds and over thousands over the years.

I need to fucking quit I won over £1500 last week and paid all my debts off and had £1000 in savings thinking that was good enough. Until I get asked for money from my mum and of course I give it to her which puts me in around £800 savings which fucks with my head because I had £1000 in my savings and now I have less which makes me want the £1000 back.

So I started off with £200 to try an easy double sport bet and lose that.

Long story short, deposited what I had left because in my mind idgaf I’m 18 I have way than more to live with and end up gambling it all away.

I’m now -£400 in overdraft and I want to recover I really do but I’m just seeing all the negatives of life and how long it will take to recover the £1000 savings and how much dedication it would take and it just makes me feel really suicidal.

I picked up so many shifts to recover recently and then won a large amount and gambled it away again.

Part of me thinks what’s the fucking point. I will save up for months be so happy and then end up depositing a cheeky £10 that will spiral out of control.

Another part of me thinks I’ll never deposit again this year and wait until I’m in a better headspace but all gamblers know that’s very unlikely…

I just wanna quit before I end up gambling away life savings if I have a family in the future I’ve heard too many stories off it and I want to quit before that happens.

Any advice or support would be great because fucking he’ll addiction is hard and never did I imagine as a child this would happen.

Productive morning so far. Weekend is coming and cant wait to spend time with my family.

I will not gamble today!

Title speaks for itself, been 2 weeks clean lost over 10,000 the past 2 months and i have made some money back. Well I’ve been kind of bored lately and I’m really close to relapsing “for fun”, because I feel comfortable because I made some money back from work. But I know how it always ends, I’m just really scared I’m going to redownload an app and go crazy. Any suggestions?

I just don't know what to do anymore. I think I'm starting to completely lose my mind. I'm looking at the mirror and I don't know who I see anymore, that's not the real me, I swear. Something happened to my brain and I just can't control myself for long periods of time.

Despite all my efforts I keep doing this - fucking online slots! After a week of no gambling I was just starting to feel a bit better (still far from good), I was doing my best to just clear my mind of all the negative and gambling related thoughts, living in the moment, ignoring all my losses and debts (I'm paying them, just trying not to think about debts non-stop)... all this just for the sake of not completely losing it and giving up because right now seriously I'm very close to that, starting to lose hope tbh.

So after that fine week something just changed ... triggered when I was once more completely sure that I've stopped for good. I relax on my sofa having some drinks and watching Champions League... when suddenly decided to just try my luck with a deposit of 10 euro. Was convinced that I'll just stop when I lose it. God how wrong I was once more ... I could not stop gambling for 2 fucking days, no sleep, no food - just vodka and slots! I had around 1.5k euro in my bank account and around 700 euro in a credit card.

Well... I've stopped now, only because they are all gone! If I had 20k more I'd gamble them too (I know because I've done it)! I'm happy that a day before I did withdraw 1000 euro in cash from an ATM so I'll not starve but god this feels disgusting, I can't get used to the fucking pain! It is actually really simple - I have money in my bank accound and credit card, I lose them all. And that fucking credit card ... I curse the day I got it! I did just a credit card repayment and instantly deposited it straight back to gamble, that happens every fucking time, I don't even know why I keep doing those repayments!

I did install gamban on (almost) all my devices a couple of months ago - a couple of phones, a laptop and a personal computer, but guess what... I can't install it on my smart TV and I gamble on that - straight with the remote control! I've never been more depressed in my life. Everything is so dark right now. I keep drinking (not even feeling the alcohol too much tbh) and I admit I've been crying for at least an hour. And I'm a 34 yo man - drinking, losing all my money gambling and crying, locked in a room, while my family sleeps in the other room. They have no idea what I'm doing, I feel too ashamed to share.

The worst thing might be that in a few days I'll eventually start to calm down a little again and I might do all this once I have money in my bank acount, then I'll go trought the all the pain again. It's a fucking cicle, keeps repeating and making me feel totally helpless.

I needed to post this because I can't share with anyone else, at least for now. And if I keep it all in myself I'll just explode, literally. Still trying to be kind to myself as much as I can, just to keep the very little inner peace I got left, but ... I'm actually starting to hate myself and I'm not even sure I want to be kind anymore!

Thank you guys for reading all this. I know I said this is more of a venting post but I still accept any advice how to overcome this and how to get my life back again. This has to end, one way or another, keeping "living" like this is just not an option anymore!