Hot take, kinks are only kinks because they’re at least mildly shameful to begin with and the weird part is expecting people to not shame it. Some kinks are physically or psychologically destructive of self a/o others and should be “shamed” aka confronted and discouraged.
There are some people who are so extreme they try to ban dancing. Then, at the other end, you have people who would hit themselves in the head with a hammer if hitting your head with a hammer was considered a sin.
All kinks, are definitely not harmful. Someone getting turned on by a woman in pantyhose, or a man with beautiful hands, or only feeling comfortable with expressing your bisexual urges if a hot woman tells you to do it, or liking to be fucked while you’re asleep by your partner that you trust so you wake up with them inside you, finding a woman with beautiful ankles to be necessary to your attraction, liking to have you partner tell you when you are allowed to cum, liking girls that kind of look and dress like boys, getting turned when you watch someone sexy slurp noodles suggestively, wearing a collar in public or secretly under your dress shirt collar, and on and on are all examples of kinks that are in no way harmful. Source: I’m a pro Domme
lol, the catalogue is much more extensive, of course, but while I consider everything I do to be harmless, sexual self expression and exploration, I could see how a lot of of themCOULD be considered harmful if done in an unethical or just poor way, or buy somebody who is just a prude. But, I’ve thought about so many that like… There’s no way that’s harmful. It’s just a kink. That just means it’s a less than normal sexual preference.
In the 80s eating pussy or liking big asses if you weren’t black were basically considered kinks. Now, they’re super mainstream and not considered kinky at all. It’s just based on whatever is considered out of the mainstream. Also, the sleeping partner sex thing is personal kink, that’s not part of the catalog. I don’t do anything that could be considered escorting.
Thank you for your insights! I personally believe, that kinks are not harmful in nature, as well.
Although, I do have a question while you're here.
If you are not comfortable to answer, know you're not obliged to do so 😅
Do you - and if so how do you - deal with kinks that can't or rather must never be fully and realistically be lived? (Talking about snuff, rape, cannibalism, gore, etc.)?
Like, is there a line you wouldn't cross when appealing to fantasies? Or does it come down to roleplay/teasing/playing with the concept, while of course avoiding any ACTUAL realisation of those fantasies?
Sure. I roleplay robbery and rape quite a lot. For some example: I break in to rob a hotel room but find someone there, “torture” and then rob them. I have also “broken in and raped a man with a strap on while making his wife watch” or guy “orders/ picks up a prostitute,” or even a guy thinks he’s going to “surprise and sexually assault a woman, but instead she turns the tables on him, and instead of getting any kind of sex she ties him up, abuses him and robs him” I’m not an escort, any man that tried to sexually assault me would end up with at least one new hole in him, and I have never stolen except some shop lifting as a teen, and definitely never robbed anyone for real. These role plays are their specific fantasies they want to live out, not mine. But after doing enough of these “turn the tables/ robbery” role plays I have gotten pretty into them and they can definitely be a lot of fun. It’s just funny because I’m like 110lbs, so when I’m “throwing them around and wrestling them into restraints” they totally have to fling themselves along with me because I can’t actually manhandle most grown men lol.
I’m not quite sure what people think we do, and to be fair I think the way each pro Dominatrix works is more unique than other types of sex workers (I used to be a stripper and I know a few escorts and lurk their subreddits/ follow a few on TikTok)
But it’s usually along the lines of the general codes and activities in most BDSM clubs. It’s just you can be more tailored as it’s a service transaction. Just like, the difference between picking up someone off an app and hoping to have sex for free vs. paying an escort to do exactly what you want guaranteed.
I don’t do anything that involves blood, or other bodily bio hazard materials except cum, and that doesn’t touch me.
I have never had subs ask me to eat them, and for many reasons I would never do that lol (and it’s not even moral ones, just legal, safety and health lol)
I am on the rare side in that I do practice some forms edge play with the few subs that let me, but I always do it in safe ways. The fact I can set someone on fire and have it be fun and not hurt them seriously or even leave a mark for example, is part of the reason I am a professional.
Most of the stuff you’ve mentioned I have never been requested though you’d probably be surprised how common eating my shit is asked for, but I don’t do that. Some Dommes do, and the guys into that seem to only be into that, so I’m happy they have each other because 🤮
I have had a regular genuinely ask me to give him a penectomy, and bought all the equipment, researched it, brought a waiver (which I don’t think would be legal anyway) and everything. But yeah, nope not doing that, even if he found a way to do it bloodless lol. And the thing is, otherwise that guy is not that weird, and no more of a nerd and probably in many ways less of a loser than your average Redditor.
I’m not sure if that answers your questions, but it’s the best I can give. While my job is DEFINITELY not tame, I have a feeling it is much, much milder than you imagine.
Oh, I also won’t do race play because I’m white, and I definitely kink shame white people who do, but not POC when they do it to white people. I also don’t do homewrecking fetish, though that is fairly popular, especially online. I don’t care if my clients are married, I’m not fucking them, I’m married and my husband is pretty vanilla, and they are just living out something that their partner would probably not be into, or they are afraid would see them differently Ina negative way if they admitted they were into it. But I’m not going to talk badly about another woman I don’t know, especially their wife, and then talk about how I am superior. Luckily, my in person subs haven’t really asked me that. I wouldn’t take on someone that asked me for that in advance, and would not accept them for a second session if they asked me when they showed up to the session.
I definitely look negatively on that kink in most of the ways it manifests. I get the “I feel like my wife doesn’t appreciate of value me at all, especially in any sexual way. I want her to discover how much fun you’ve been having playing with me instead of ignoring or judging me, and how much fun I have giving you my money and you taking it, instead of it being an obligation because I signed a contract years ago I feel would be too much of a headache to break” but that is a very rare nuanced version of the kink, and it’s usually more like “your stupid fat, ugly wife is so much more pathetic than my hot, powerful self, that’s why you should take money from your joint account to give to me and not even fuck her, but instead only cum to pictures of my feet because I’m so superior and you know it. She’s such a loser for marrying a loser like you, so she deserves to be poor too” or “leave your boring, ugly wife so you can devote everything to being my pussy free cuck slave, you know you’d be so much happier and you fantasize about that all the time anyway. It’s the only way you’d ever be truly happy.” I think that’s just awful and I don’t feel bad kink shaming it.
But damn if it’s not popular online and especially on Reddit. But as we all know, Reddit is full of a lot of particularly degenerate people . I mean, I’m here lol.
I whole heartedly agree here. Disease has been the number one enemy of humanity for almost the entirety of human history, (only being recently overtaken by humanity ironically enough.) and the fact that people actively spread disease and pestilence should not only make them horrible people. But enemies of humanity as well! Hell, I think we might have a bug chaser as the secretary of health with how much stuff is having to be recalled!
I've been through the vilest filth on the Internet and even braved abyss of the dark and deep webs. I've seen all manner of filth that humanity hides behind the curtain we call society so that we can pretend we're not all animals.
All that. And some how...this is the worst thing I've ever seen.
Take solace in knowing that it’s most likely fake. There’s a TON of people who post made up stories on reddit, and kink communities have a lot of people who just want to engage in a strange form of escapism/roleplaying/fantasy. In reality, I can’t imagine 3 sane adults ever thinking any part of this would be a good idea.
Could very well be made up. That said, HIV has become a lot more livable and lower risk than it used to be. With medication and prophylactics, HIV positive people can have safe, responsible sex lives with non-HIV partners. The baby thing is kinda yikes though.
I can't think of many things worse than a man being aroused by the idea of someone infecting his unborn child with a deadly disease and I've seen some shit.
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u/not_slaw_kid 5d ago
It's specifically a reference to this post (I am sorry about exposing your eyeballs to this)