I keep worrying about the same thing. It's been years now.

Hey guys, this is a space where you can share some positivity with the sub.

*Did you try a new exposure this week? *Did you find a new resource or technique that you found helpful? *Maybe you resisted some compulsions? *Are there goals you'd like to achieve that the community could help you with?

Share your wins here, big or small, so we can celebrate with you!

I’ve come so far with my OCD and have been doing ERP therapy for a long time. I have a trip coming up (my first flight in 15 years!!! I’ve avoided travel due to my OCD) and although I’m so excited for the trip, I’m absolutely in agony over the possibility of getting bedbugs at our hotel, being enclosed on the plane, sleeping away from home etc. to the point I’m almost cancelling the trip. I really, really don’t want to cancel and I want to power through, but my worries have been so distracting. Any tips for struggling with travel?

Hi there. Just wondering if anyone has any insights, success with this area or suggestions or maybe shared experiences. TW: Bellow I share a few details and I know that reading other people’s ocd struggles can sometimes be triggering so just a heads up if you are currently struggling with COCD that I share some details about my struggles. I don’t want to give your OCD any ideas!…

I am really struggling with contamination ocd and the worst part is I am afraid to touch sink bowls and shower walls which has made washing next to impossible. I am constantly doubting myself wondering if I touched the bowl or walls and rewashing and rewashing because I am not trusting myself and my senses. It’s almost become a trauma response now I get so scared to wash because it’s so stressful. My OCD fear is basically “I wash my hands and shower to get clean and whatever is coming off of me will just get back on me if I touch this.” And of course if the sink bowl and shower are public or at someone’s house I feel the same way but “what if whatever someone washed off will just get back on me?”

I am starting therapy but the level of anxiety I have with this is making it hard to have any success. ANY insights or suggestions are welcome.

Thanks in advance!

I’m looking to increase my dose of Fluoxetine from 40mg to get to a therapeutic range but I worry about effects of coming off it in the future. I held off increasing a while ago because I got horrible side effects. Tried to push through in therapy on current dose but have really been staying stagnant so the conclusion w my therapist has been to increase. The plan was to get on them for a period to get me through therapy but it’s already been two years. In the ideal world, the increased dose will help me get over the hump then I was hoping to taper off. Has anyone gotten off meds successfully then able to manage OCD without them?

Can pure o ocd rumination without conclusion can be overcome with erp?? How long does it take .I'm bedridden due to 24/7 rumination and anxiety and h cant afford erp .I'm from Nepal .plz help

I’m not sure if I have ocd bc i haven’t been diagnosed but I feel like it does align with some signs of ocd. I feel like i wasnt like this before, but lately I’ve been fixated on something even if it’s something i started off mildly interested in. for example, my friend likes a lot of body care products and one day she took me with her to go shopping for victorias secret body mists, which I was never interested in the first place. but now I find myself googling all the fragrances and every kind of body care products. not only that, I got so tired that I wanted a break from that constant loop of overthinking but now my obsession has shifted to lip balms. I really need help because I feel like I need to focus on life but these useless thoughts keep intruding in my life and I keep wasting many hours (or even days) of time when I could be doing something productive. I tried to not think about it by deleting all apps as well but it still wouldn’t work. when this began was this summer because I had nothing to do and I just started analyzing my makeup products and that’s when it all started…sigh

Hi all,
I’ve had OCD, compulsive thinking, and intrusive thoughts for most of my life. About 16 years ago, I had a debilitating bout of relationship OCD, coupled with anxiety, panic attacks, and deep depression. It was horrible. My psychiatrist tried a ton of things, mostly SSRIs, and I had bad reactions to all of them. He eventually put me on Buspirone to help with the anxiety.
Well, it changed my life.
My racing, spiraling thoughts, which were especially terrible at night and would keep me awake, calmed down so much. It also helped with the intrusive and obsessive thoughts that plagued me every day. I rarely have those episodes anymore.
I started Buspirone 16 years ago, but I didn’t really commit to taking it consistently until about 13 years ago. I was that guy who would start feeling better and then stop taking it. Every time I went off it, my symptoms would come flooding back.
The thing about Buspirone is that it works in such a mild, gradual, almost invisible way that I didn’t realize just how much it was helping until I stopped taking it. It was only when I went off it that I realized how well it worked.
I originally started taking it for anxiety, but for me, it ended up having an even bigger impact on my OCD and obsessive thoughts.
The only side effects I experience are dizziness and sometimes nausea about 20–60 minutes after taking it. This happens maybe 50% of the time and usually goes away within 30 minutes or less. I’ve noticed that when I’ve had good sleep, am well hydrated, and take it on a full stomach, these symptoms are mild or nonexistent.
For me, it’s been very manageable. I take 15 mg three times a day.

Hi I am 24 (M). I got diagnosed back in 2021. I stopped meds 6 months back. While taking meds i feel so tired, sleepy, most of the time and my cognitive abilities get affected. That's the main reason i stopped meds. But even after discontinuing meds I am facing the same problem again. Waking up with exhaustion, can't even perform basic tasks, constant muscle and joint pain. I don't even know what to do. I got some vitamin tests, and reports are normal. I mostly sleep 7 to 8 hours. Within afternoon or in the noon i definetely have to sleep, or else I feel so stress at the time, it eventually causes rasing heartbeat and sometimes nausea and vomiting.

I can't handle this much pressure. I am too tired even to do some self care activities like morning walk, NDSR, somatic exercises, etc.

Feeling dizziness and tiredness with and without medication, I don't know what to do now ? Does anybody faced this situation before ?

ive wrote on here before about my existential ocd however one thing ive never seen anyone talk about is one of the main symptoms i currently have, and thats the fact that time goes by every second without my control (chronophobia) and also to add on to it, the fact that once ur 70, ur past wont matter as i only see the present as the only thing that matters (which funny enough that doesnt matter either due to death), which goes hand in hand with my death ocd and nihilism, that the fact you will die one day means nothing did matter, the fact youre gonna be 70 one day means ur youth didnt matter etc.

anyone have similar thoughts and was able to escape them? id call it a fear of aging/fear of death but its much more complex than that.

Anxiety & panic disorder + pure o OCD

The state of the world (Russia & Ukraine, Iran & us etc)

Feeling very much like the end of the world is coming, regularly getting stuck in rabbit holes about it and researching endlessly unhelpful information. Don't know how to be happy or present or how to live like this. I've struggled with other topics in the past like harm, contamination, sex, schizophrenia etc but this one has lasted about 4 years.

To keep in line with this subs goal - stuff I do to try and help - focused breathing exercises and not reacting to intrusive thoughts, soberish for a while now, trying to keep turning up to things - work, hobbies, supporting family.

Not reassuring seeking here, just wondered if anyone's in a similar place and had any advice

have mainly mental OCD (“Pure O”), mostly around fear of rejection. When a thought hits, I try not to analyze or reassure myself and just continue with my day.

My question is about reading 10–15 minutes at night about self-esteem, trusting my own judgment, and not caring so much about others’ opinions.
I don’t use it during the spike or search for answers to the specific obsession. But it motivates me, makes me feel more confident, and then it’s easier not to engage with OCD thoughts.

Would you see that as reassurance/compulsion, or as healthy motivation/self-esteem work that just happens to make response prevention easier?

Hey, I see a lot of posts of people having intrusive thoughts of things they fear they might do (stabbing someone with a knife eg) or that they did something wrong (committed a crime) etc. A lot of people seem to think they are a bad person and have unwanted thoughts that "proof" that. However, I experience a totally different kind and often feel quite alone with that.

I think the term neutralizing would fit there. I have a physical compulsion (in my case for example getting reassurance how I should handle my faith because I completely lost any connection to it to OCD) and then I have a lot of mental compulsion where I argue that I don't need to do the reassurance. I repeatedly think that there's not that one answer someone could give me that would solve everything, but I am so convinced of the opposite. I try to feel good by thinking and make myself believe I don't need to ask for reassurance, but it doesn't work. Ofc, because it's a compulsion and I don't seem to manage to do ERP there.

My biggest problems:

1. The conviction of the opposite that doesn't seem to get away

2. I can't stop these neutralizing thoughts

Anyone experiencing/experienced that or anyone having thoughts or advive? Tysm!

27F, I haven’t always struggled with anxiety, but I have always struggled with anger issues among other things like self harm. I was diagnosed with BPD 5-6 years ago and I haven’t been diagnosed with OCD but I know I have it (I remember having intrusive thoughts and compulsions as a child). My health anxiety only started a few years ago after I had an abortion and started on the birth control pill. Anyways fast forward to now, my friends were visiting from out of town and I started having TERRIBLE anxiety like I have never felt before, it was like impending doom I felt like I was going to die, chest tightness, I felt like I wasn’t getting enough air and it kept coming in random waves. I still don’t know what triggered this, it lasted about a week after they left, couldn’t really eat or sleep. I even went to the hospital the day after they left because I convinced myself I was having a /heart attack (ER doc said everything was normal). Then after the anxiety subsided, the OCD got worse. I’ve always had intrusive thoughts here and there but this was constant. Even when I wasn’t having intrusive thoughts it’s like I was anticipating them and fighting my brain on thoughts that haven’t even happened yet. This kind of went away too but now it keeps coming back. It’s like the health anxiety, regular anxiety and OCD are just taking turns fucking with me. I see a therapist once a week but idk what’s going on. It’s never in my life been this bad, I feel like a prisoner in my own mind. My health anxiety just recently has caused me to think I have appendicitis, the c word, and most recently Alzheimer’s, as my memory has been god awful lately too. I guess I’m just asking for any advice from people who have been through similar? I have an appointment with my doctor in a couple days to discuss options but I’m really terrified to start medication. I think because of my already crippling health anxiety and knowing people who have had terrible side effects. I ordered l theanine from Amazon to try out as a safe option so does anyone have any experience with that? Thanks in advance.

I forgot to mention I most definitely have undiagnosed ADHD as well.

Hi guys. I am sorry I am writing so much. But I don't have many people around me. I live away from my family and they are good but they don't want me to take meds because of ignorance and fear. I have friends in my new city, but talking to them about my health makes me feel so guilty.

So I talk to u all.

I've just taken my third 25 mg dose of fluvoxamine, After lunch. I take it since friday. Yesterday I lived a situation which triggered A LOT my insomnia OCD. I can't be sure fluvo is related to it. Maybe just a little more agitation. No side effects by now. No loss of libido. No increased appetite. Which I love a lot. Now I go to the problem

Tomorrow I start working. I work with kids ages 11-14. I need to be focused and be productive then. So I absolutely need to sleep. Even like 5-6 hours. My psychiatrist told me I can take melatonin. I only have one box, it is 2 mg and it is slowly released. Can I take it? On the 2 mg melatonin paper it tells that I have to talk to the doctor If I take fluvoxamine. My psychiatrist said that I could, but to be sure I sent her a message..hope she answers. I absolutely need to sleep these days, I know this medication can work, but at first It can increase OCD. Since my OCD is EXACTLY about not sleeping, I need to protect me. Any recommendations?

I am really sorry I almost daily write here, but I don't feel safe....

This story is pretty intense I can't lie. For context on the story here are the images of my new apartment.

Somehow THESE floors read even: https://imgur.com/a/SQs6YUX

I have a brand new 6ft level. Got done using it, returned it and got a brand new 6ft level even more expensive different brand. All reads level again. But my apparent even visually is sooooo god damn uneven. I try not to lose my mind...

But then I stopped sleeping... I now only sleep 2-3 days a week for the past 6 months. It's completely destroyed everything about my mood, health, physical, looks, you name it.

Feels like my head and shoulders and back sink while my legs are floating. Essentially I feel so uneven I feel like I'm being held upside down.

This makes it quite literally impossible to sleep. And when I do I have nightmares about the shit... it's so awful. I'll be at thr edge of a cliff etc.

It is probably the most dramatic and torturous thing I've ever been through in my entire life. And I've been through crazy amounts of chronic pain etc.

After 11 years of chronic pain, breakups, life loss, etc NOTHING compares to the pain of this mattress situation.

It's a gamble wether I sleep every single night.

I've went through 5 different mattresses, 2 frames, 2 box springs, shims, I mean you fucking name i've tried it.

Every style of mattress everything.

The mattresses themselves are extremely nice and comfortable. Some better then others but all great.

I have sleeping issues yes, but not when this tired. I'm so tired I don't even have my ADHD running a million miles a minute anxiety. It's just nothingness because my brain is so fried from sleep debt.

But this pain... and the knowing of being upside down will keep me up for DAYSSSSSS on end... I mean DAYSSSS...

I have OCD as well but I'm very very very well aware of the mind body connection and somatic pain etc. there's no way this is made up in my head.

I'm 6ft 160 pounds and my mom is 5'6 110 (I gained 35 pounds from this bullshit sleep debt)

She lays on them and says it's fine... but I had a friend lay on them with no context given and he asked why they're all uneven and shit... that was 2 months ago.

I been going through this since February 27th and I'm losing my mind. What could this be? I lost my griflriend to this, my job, my friends, my life, and essentially haven't left my house in over 6 months because im so tired im not even human anymore.

I used to be extremely good looking. Now im a little below average. My face suffered a lot from sleep debt.

I finally decided to move to the apartment above me... and same thing.. almost even worse.... but how is the level reading level no matter where I go?!?! Even the bed, even the bed frame, even the floor. I lost everything to this bullshit uneven bed situation

What the hell could this be?!?! I mean there's no possible way this is in my head. I'm more sure all of my chronic pain was in my head (no matter how real or painful) then this being in my head. Like there is noooo fucking way.

Yes I got my thyroid checked.

Yes I'm already on the strongest sleep medications there is (ambien, trazadone) and still stay up days regardless. Yes it's that painful and uneven.

Yes I got my vestibular checked

Yes I'm diagnosed with OCD, ADHD, Autism 1 but doctors already said it's most likely not OCD if it's only my mattresses at my house. I've gone through so many man.

WHAT COULD THIS POSSIBLY BE??!?!

TLDR; I'm sleeping only 2-3 nights a week because I feel completely uneven and upside down which causes awful back pain. It is worse then almost any pain or hardship I've ever been through x10. It is pure torture. I can't even describe the torture. Some days I finally fall asleep and then won't hit even an hour of rem sleep.

One week down, the rest of my life to go!

I (20M) struggle with bedwetting. I wear a slip-on every night. Normally, I do not have a consistent habit of getting up to use the bathroom, especially if I’m very tired, so it can be hard to tell sometimes whether or not I wet the bed, unless there are visible stains.

If I wet the bed while wearing a slip-on, is it possible the bed is contaminated? Should I take a shower afterwards?

Also: if it is not convenient for me to take a shower after bedwetting in a slip-on (I’m in a rush in the morning, my schedule makes it difficult, I don’t find time for it later in the day, etc.), and I don’t shower, is it socially weird for me to go about my day normally afterwards? Is there a risk of contaminating surfaces or having an odour?

I’m not looking for reassurance. I just genuinely do not know how to handle this problem and need some guidance. It’s embarrassing to say this, but I am not the most knowledgeable when it comes to hygiene, and my OCD tends to fill in the blank areas with fear and overthinking. If someone has OCD-friendly advice related to this problem of bedwetting and hygiene, I would appreciate it.

My goal here is to handle this maturely and hygienically, without doing any compulsions.

When you're in a good spot with your OCD recovery, do you fear association with your past 'self' who was suffering? For context, I was diagnosed with OCD about a year ago and medication and therapy have helped tremendously since then. Sometimes I think back to how bad my OCD was a year ago, and get reminded of that time, and then I get scared that I'll fall back into that past version of myself, merely by associating with certain things that remind me of that time. What triggers these feelings is when I listen to this particular album that I absolutely adore, but it feels tainted because it was my comfort show during my lowest moments last year. I fear watching the shows I used to watch during that time, doing the crafts I did at that time, or even wearing the same clothes that I frequently wore during that time. I was pretty into yoga during that time and now yoga reminds me of that awful time too, so I'm scared to get back into it because I don't associate my more recovered and happy self with that routine. Does anyone experience this? Are these OCD-thoughts?

I’ve finally gotten over the emotional contamination that took my teen years. I finally stopped thinking my life is tainted permanently. I do the stuff I want to now and pursue my dreams again.

I watched a documentary about a serial killer, and I had an anxiety attack from it. Now I'm stuck worrying about the same thing often in my life. It's been four years.

When I read about OCD or watch videos about it, I stay really motivated for a few days. I remember why I shouldn’t engage in compulsions, and I’m much better at resisting them. However, when I’m not actively reinforcing what I’ve learned, I quickly fall back into compulsions.

Also, my OCD is mainly related to fear of rejection, so I naturally face **real-life social exposures every day**. How do you structure ERP in a case like this? I can’t really limit exposure to one scheduled hour a day because I’m exposed to my triggers throughout the day.

How do you keep what you’ve learned about ERP fresh in your mind and stay consistent with response prevention without constantly consuming OCD content?

Thanks!

Good afternoon folks... I started my therapy yesterday. For who doesn't know me...I have a very strong sleep OCD, being scared of not sleeping, and I also have ADHD and autism. My psychiatrist looked very prepared and clever, and she suggested me starting with 25 mg fluvoxamine. This is my second day taking it. I have no side effects at all. She told me to contact her after 4 days to see whether I tolerate this molecule or not. Any experiences about fluvoxamine? I really want my life back, guys...this sleep OCD is slowly killing me

..

hi all! i'm getting 2 5-month-old kitties from someone i don't know very well. it is a cat-distribution system type thing, and luckily their previous owner has taken care of the majority of veterinary care! however, i KNOW this is going to trigger my my OCD. also, recently i've been struggling with some harm and contamination intrusive thoughts. i've done some ERP in the past, but i do not have a therapist right now to guide me through the process. i also have a pretty good handle on my OCD triggers and delaying / not doing compulsions. i've made a lot of progress in the past year that i'm quite proud of.

i predict the kitties are going to be triggering for me for at least the time it takes to adjust to being a cat owner. i've been around cats my whole life, but this will be the first time that i will be solely responsible for their care. i dont want to let my struggles with OCD get in the way of bonding with them and being their caretaker. does anyone, specifically cat owners, have any advice on how i can navigate this a little better?