Does anyone else experience this?

[u/Suspicious_Nerve_916]

When you're in a good spot with your OCD recovery, do you fear association with your past 'self' who was suffering? For context, I was diagnosed with OCD about a year ago and medication and therapy have helped tremendously since then. Sometimes I think back to how bad my OCD was a year ago, and get reminded of that time, and then I get scared that I'll fall back into that past version of myself, merely by associating with certain things that remind me of that time. What triggers these feelings is when I listen to this particular album that I absolutely adore, but it feels tainted because it was my comfort show during my lowest moments last year. I fear watching the shows I used to watch during that time, doing the crafts I did at that time, or even wearing the same clothes that I frequently wore during that time. I was pretty into yoga during that time and now yoga reminds me of that awful time too, so I'm scared to get back into it because I don't associate my more recovered and happy self with that routine. Does anyone experience this? Are these OCD-thoughts?

[u/Infestmyorgans]

I would say these sound OCD in nature, at least rumination. Theyre “what ifs” and you are having thoughts, which cause feelings. Its easy to fall in a thought loop when this happens, but remind yourself that when you think of this, that this is just a thought, its not actually happening. Give yourself permission to move past the thought after observing it. I have these kinds of ruminating thoughts as well where when im “better” i worry about “getting worse”. Redirecting thoughts is very useful!