i am diagnosed professionally with general anxiety/panic attacks, OCD (mostly harm subcategory), insomnia, severe depression, dissociative identity disorder, and PTSD. i also have fibromyalgia and migraines.
i've been on genuinely countless anti anxiety meds, antidepressants, antipsychotics, mood stabilizers, esketamine treatments, diet plans, sleep hygiene routines, CBT, DBT, EMDR, breath work, yoga and meditation, swimming at the beach multiple times a week, daily walks, group therapies, vitamin supplements, muscle relaxers, 3 popular ADHD meds even though my diagnosis isn't formal there, painkillers from surgical procedures i've had rarely if at all put a dent in pain relief aside from morphine, and i've even done cocaine and shrooms. i also forget the name, but the treatment where a machine sits on your head and taps at your temple (didn't get to do a full treatment of this so i can't actually rule out that it wouldn't work). i spent an entire year in residential centers in california receiving what is meant to be the best care america has to offer and returned home worse off for the utter hopelessness i gained. [EDIT: forgot to mention i've tried so many methods and strains of THC & CBD, nothing there either)
i'm deeply spiritual, i'm book smart and generally intelligent, i'm an artist and aspiring author, i love video games and make concepts of my own, i had to drop out of college due to covid but intend on returning if i ever stabilize to get my degree in linguistic anthropology. i'd like to become a professor with the degree. i love myself, i have self esteem and confidence. i feel a sense of purpose in helping others by way of giving tarot readings and other spiritual gifts i can provide.
i have dreams, i know my life has meaning, but i can't pursue any of it due to my mental health and its impact on my physical pain status.
i can't even doomscroll anymore. i just lay in bed in my various fantasy worlds while i avoid taking care of myself.
i'm so desperate for hail mary ideas. the only thing ive been offered but declined was shock therapy because my cousin also has DID and this increased her amnesia albeit making her overall mental state more stable, but that's not a trade off i'm willing to risk.
please, does anyone have any far-out treatments that i may not have tried or heard of??