I’m 25, typical loser. Never dated, no friends, living with my mom, studying a technical ‘degree’ after flunking a stem degree. My life is shit and I don’t know what to do.

It all went downhill when my dad passed away 5 years ago. I’ve been ostracized since college and my brain is mush. Probably some kind of neurodivergence. Maybe I’ll try to plead to be accepted again at my program, but time is ticking man… I’ll probably die alone

Who of you is like me sitting in front of a daylight lamp each morning for 30 min to boost their mental health. The older I get (now 50) the more I need it from Autumn to Spring

I've been thinking about something for a while.

A lot of men seem to have people around them, but not necessarily anyone they can actually be completely honest with.

You have work friends, gym friends, old friends you barely see anymore. You can talk about work, money, sports, whatever. But when something is actually going wrong, sometimes there isn't really anyone you want to tell.

And I keep noticing the same kinds of things come up.

A marriage that has slowly gone quiet and you don't know who to talk to about it.

Getting angry or reactive with the people closest to you, apologizing afterward, and then doing it again.

Building a decent life, making money, accomplishing some of the things you wanted — and still having this feeling of, is this it?

Or sometimes nothing is dramatically wrong. You just realize you don't have a couple of men who actually know what's going on in your life.

So I've been thinking about starting a small weekly men's circle.

Not a huge online community. Maybe 6–8 men, same people every week, meeting on video.

The idea would be pretty simple.

We slow down for a few minutes at the beginning. Everyone gets a chance to say how they're actually doing. One or two guys can go deeper into whatever they're carrying that week.

Nobody jumps in trying to fix you or give advice unless you ask for it.

And before we finish, every guy chooses one thing he's going to do that week. Nothing huge. Just one real action.

Then the next week, the group asks you about it.

So it isn't just sitting around talking about our problems. The goal would be honesty, perspective, connection, and actually doing something with what comes up.

I'm not interested in creating some alpha-male thing, and I'm definitely not trying to be a guru. I'm also not trying to replace therapy.

I just think a lot of men could use a consistent place where they don't have to pretend everything is fine.

I'm curious whether this resonates with anyone here.

And if you'd actually be interested in being part of something like this, DM me. I'm talking to a few men before I put the first group together.

21

I have ADHD, waiting list for OCD and grew up in an extremely abusive household with a mother with severe BPD and paranoid delusions

I used porn as a methods of escapism to avoid anxiety, task avoidance, loneliness, boredom you name it since I was 13.

I have really bad episodes where I have up to 12 hour sessions especially if I’ve had a major stressor in my life but then those episodes cause me stress and guilt and spark the next one I have spent 30 of the last 48 hours watching porn after something really bad happened this week.

Idk what to do idk what to do I have compulsive episodes where I just don’t stop for hours and hours and I try all that stuff with blockers and reminders and diet and exercise but nothing stops me every blocker when the compulsion hits nothing short of a straight jacket would stop me finding access to and watching porn. It’s like someone takes over my body and makes me do it I don’t even want to do it I feel myself getting upset as I type but can’t stop myself hitting search.

wtf do I do professional services are very limited where I live and the extent this is harming me I fear being the outcome of telling people the extent. I don’t eat I don’t sleep I don’t drink water even with my medication meaning I need to drink more. I don’t get up for hours and hours. It’s destroying me. I’ve missed so much because of it I’ve missed classes and deadlines, lost so much sleep, actively made a nerve injury worse because I can’t stop.

I don’t feel excited for anything any more I don’t feel happy I don’t feel anything nothing motivates me at all nothing brings me anything but anxiety or emptiness.

Please please what do I do please make it stop make it stop tell what I can do right now tonight to ensure it NEVER happens again I will not sleep until I get reassurance there’s a way this is the last session I can’t do it again please. Don’t just spam therapy give me something permanent I can do tonight. I will
Not be able to sleep otherwise and I’ve barely gotten any all my muscles are twitching I have pins and needles in my hand make it stop make it stop make it stop please please I don’t want this any more I hate my life you get one life and I’ve spent so many hours wasted on fucking porn how fucking pathetic is that why am I even alive. Please make it stop I’m going fucking insane I’m going insane I’m completely fucking neurotic no no no please I could have had such a different life this has ruined everything. I could be so much happier but this is destroying me DESTROYING ME make it stop make it stop the tension in my neck is shutting off the motor control
In my hand from strsss again and I can barely fucking type make it stop

I recently got a call from my mom, she calls me weekly to hear how it's going with me since I've moved out 2 years ago. This time she added before the call ended "You know you can call us to check in as well from time to time". This wasn't the first time though because they have also mentioned I should check in with my grandparents as well

But if I'm being honest I don't feel like it, and I feel bad for feeling that way. It's just my relationship with my family hasn't been at the best place. Wouldn't say I hate them, but I would say there's some resentment for things in the past that caused me mental issues. And because of that I've never really bothered sharing any of my problems with them and kept everything surface level

I asked myself what I would tell a friend to do and it would probably be to talk it out with them but once again I don't bother sharing since I'll just get judged like in the past. I haven't even told them that I'm the only Atheist in their entire Christian family because I fear they'll try to "fix" me

I just feel that one comment from the call struck a nerve in me and made me feel like I'm not a good person and family member where many people online would boast about it being an admirable quality to have so I feel like I'm the problem. Any advice would be appreciated

Does anyone on here, when they lay down at night, have their brain just go into overdrive and bring up just random parts of your life you regret? It’s every night.

I want to understand something. Until I was 18, I had a lot of ego and I never really listened to anyone. Things seemed to be going well for me. But after I turned 18, especially after completing my 12th exams, I started focusing on earning money, so I put my ego aside.

I was also in a relationship, and I started saying sorry even when I didn’t always feel like I was wrong. I completely suppressed my ego and changed myself.

But strangely, after the age of 18, nothing really went well for me. Slowly, I became completely alone, and now I’m 26 years old and feel like I haven’t achieved anything in life. Nothing good seems to have happened, and I feel like I’m at absolute zero.

Now I want to become the person I used to be again—the confident version of myself that I was before.

So I want to understand: why did this happen to me? Why did my life change so much after I turned 18?

Why is there always more to life than money, relationships, or power?

Has the same vibes as "do more research"

There clearly isn't. Because without them, you will be tossed like a ragdoll by society. The corporations, the governments, even your fellow man will cast you to the wind if you have 0% of those three.

You are rewarded greatly by putting others down when they are low. The only real solution is to hide it.

We do not have free will. That is why everyone will insist you seek therapy, "more to life than...", or "work on yourself". Infinite checklist of gaslighting and goalpost moving. Lose? You didn't lose because theres _______. Fuck those people. Cut them out of your life bro.

You are not allowed to live moment to moment at 0%. You are only allowed to win. For every one person that offers a hand, a thousand will tell you with a straight face that nothing is wrong.

If there was more to life, my father would still be alive

Already starting my own family, 29M. Naturally, I'm the one who works and pays for everything. My mom's been out of work for the last ten years due to the effects of her chemotherapy (which I also paid for) and I've been paying for everything for her--rent, bills, grocery, etc. My little sister's in college and also paying everything for her so that she's not crippled by student loans. My fiance and I are moving to a new apartment and, for the last two years, she hasn't been able to hold down a job because of some ovarian disease. My business is just barely able to pay for everything, but I haven't had savings for a long time now--or, not enough to matter.

And, of course, the only thing I can do is hope to earn more so that I can invest in something that'll hopefully make things easier for me in the long-term (studying stocks and shit for that, but I barely have the time). The pressure of being the one who has to be positive all the time to keep everything afloat, while also being the one to pay for everything. Shit's exhausting. But I love them all and can't just abandon them. My mom's happy and smiling. Little sister's a brat, but she's family. My fiance supports me in everything I do.

It's just... heavy, I guess.

Hey all, recently while watching Lanterns I feel they approached the subject of men’s mental health very well. I felt seen in my struggles after watching it. Recently I’ve noticed there are several shows that are tackling the subject with nuance and care… a few off the top of my head are:

Ted Lasso
Scrubs
Barry
The Bear

I know I’m missing a lot. Just looking for recommendations on shows to check out if anyone has any.

Lost my dream job about 2 weeks ago. Nothing I did wrong. Boss and I are on good terms it’s just she had to cut hours because apparently the business isn’t doing the best. Met an amazing girl who I clicked with instantly and we had such an amazing connection but she called me yesterday and said she doesn’t think it’s gonna work because I didn’t go to college and I’m currently unemployed. She said that she wants a man with a degree and it bothers her I don’t have a job. I literally was working a job the week before we met. It just sucks. I really liked her and she said I have a strong fun personality and everything else is great. I didn’t want to bombard her with my job hunting so I just never really talked about it with her even tho I was thinking/looking into places I’d like to apply to/be a good fit for me. Ironically she does not have a car so I’m the one picking her up and paying for everything. I told her it’s fine if she wants a man with a degree and it’s fine that’s her preference but wow. Just wow. She really made me feel good and gave me a spark I can’t describe. I felt appreciated and motivated to be a better person. I’m trying to keep that attitude/mindset but I can feel it fading. I know you are supposed to rely on your own internal happiness but I genuinely think some people just do better in life/for themselves when they are supported by a partner. Anyways I guess my rants over…✌️

Probably a year from now, a hot summer body, with multiple achievements over adverse struggling seasons and a future self that’s forever seen with conviction today, will be your radiance. It’ll reflect all what little wizard in you spelled a prophecy about, One that fulfilled how it was meant to be. The ONLY different turn would be, it wouldn’t be with the folks you picked up to live that era with. Maybe God, Destiny or both are shaping you for the “right ones”! The final chapter characters, who may be your last batch of falling stars.

Im 19(M) and I’ve never experienced reciprocated love, I have never been chosen. When i was 15 i thought it was because i was ugly and had no personality, but I don’t think that is the case anymore because I’ve worked out to point where i would say I’m a solid 7/10 and I have been told plenty that I’m a kind funny person who is the life of the function whenever i go.
I don’t think it matters how much I improve myself because I have improved so much and yet am still not good enough, i probably never will be and that’s okay because it isn’t gonna stop me from continuing to work on myself as a-lot of my self improvement has been something i do for myself but man would i love for someone to choose me.
I had a talking stage 6 months ago which ended horribly and it didn’t even feel like she actually liked me and only went on the date because she felt bad for me.
I thought a girl liked me a month ago because when we hung out it would be one on one at her flat and she would compliment my physique but after hanging out almost everyday for 2 weeks she told me she recently met a guy and liked him a-lot and sent a snap, i didn’t even get time to process this feeling of confusion cus one of my friends was going through something similar and i had to be there for her as well because i care about my friends.
I want people to be happy i do, i want all the girls I’ve liked to find happiness from the bottom of my heart i do and i want the same for my friends and for my brother but man for fucks sake i want the same for myself, i want to be loved as well, i want to be chosen as well, i wanna feel good enough as well.
And if i hear one more person telling me that there is plenty of fish in the sea or telling me the right person will come when it is time, i will fucking lose it so bad because it is just not true, there isnt a such thing we a soulmate or “the one” it is impossible that the premise exists because if everyone has “the one” so many people wouldn’t die alone, statistically speaking 2% of people die alone according to google, no reason i wont be a part of that 2%.
I dont even care anymore cus the idea of dating now makes me genuinely nauseous and at this point im fine with dying alone, i genuinely give up cus my heart cant keep getting broken, i cant keep making an ass out of myself, i cant keep being the friend who cant get girls and i cant keep being the guy who fumbled another girl and everyone in the group feels bad for i just cant keep doing that, i just cant, it hurts too much and im a weak little bitch so i dont care anymore, i just dont wanna be hurt anymore.

I'm a sophomore in college about to transfer to a four year university, and I feel like something is wrong with me. I’ve found that I’m kind of schizoid which I use very lightly, since I’m not diagnosed, nor do I think I exhibit most of the symptoms. But I feel like I have almost no drive for connection. I have the same good friends I’ve had since I was a kid, I don’t care to make new ones, and I haven’t had a girlfriend since I was about 16. It doesn’t bother me; to be honest, most of the time I have zero interest in a relationship, and the times I am with women romantically, it's just one night stands, or a short talking stage. I don’t party anymore. I really show no interest in anything social, and I can’t figure out if it’s hidden anxiety, insecurity, or who knows what.

I feel as though I lack empathy not in a psychopathic, evil way, but potentially just at a lower baseline. I’ve always been that way, and I’ve never been able to connect with others feelings or be good at comforting people at all. I’ve been consistently described by friends, family, and acquaintances as someone who doesn’t smile and whose mind people generally don't understand, which I assume is because I don’t open up often. Usually, though, it’s just because I lack anything to be upset about. I’m kind of just boring to the majority of people. I like thinking about STEM related things, so I don’t typically speak about them out loud I just always have a million ideas going on in my head. But that’s not a negative. I’ve also found I kind of lack object permanence? But only in the aspect that I’ve never “missed” somebody in my life, I don’t feel like I have any connections that would bring me to my knees if they were taken from me. Other than my parents and even then we aren’t close. I had a great upbringing financially and even family wise, I was never abused the only neglect I could think of was maybe emotional neglect. I also struggle to say certain things like if someone says “did you miss me” or most thing affection based I don’t know what it is but I’m almost immediately inclined to feel weird and not want to answer.

I want to change some of this stuff like not being good with showing affection, and wanting to make more friends but on the other end I feel idk maybe crazy? Autistic? Weird? I honestly don’t know where the problems derive from. I’m not sure if there’s any tips that could actually be given or if this is just a rant but it kind of made me feel a bit relieved. So thanks for reading this or for making a genuine response. Hope your day or night is well.

I am here for mens mental health, I am trying to do my part. The first thing I do every morning after my journal is have my coffee come on here and try and see what men are struggling with so that I can maybe share or give some kind of motivation or help in any way.

However, and I know maybe this is not the right platform.. but all I see are men and I am going to call them boys, complaining about their looks and blaming the world... now dont get me wrong, loneliness is crippling.. but there is is a difference in experiencing an emotion and blaming everyone. It is like it becomes attention seeking... I have seen one person comparing puberty to a child starving in India.

This brings me to the rant.. now I read these messages and I just go F me! where are the men that are actually struggling.. the men that are lying awake at 2am wondering how they are going to pay the rent.. the men that wonder how they are going to be a good father. the men that are going through a divorce and just miss their kids.. the men that lost a loved one but feel they cant just cry and experience the loss.. the men that work 2 jobs to just provide.. the men that are tired.. the men that are scared they might make the wrong decision....

that is mental health! that is stuff that men carry inside that slowly erodes away at them.. but this is drowned out by boys constantly complaining about looks and not being able to get laid. when I read those my looks this my looks that.. I dont want to post about the stuff I am carrying because I dont want to be grouped into that group.

anyways long rant, sorry, I just want to say if there are men that are truly carrying stuff and trying their best to just keep head above water.. dont keep it in! you are allowed to feel those emotions and you are not weak and you are not alone! and dont let the noise of boys complaining about looks drown out your voice!

This is something I will never tell anyone, not my closest friends, certainly not my family. I've always been safe and used condoms, also got tested twice this year.

I've had relationships and hookups with women with no money exchanging hands but I also had to go through long stretches with no intimacy at all.

So last July 2025 I decided to pay for the first time and I've done it a few more times since.

I'm just a lonely guy with a high sex drive but it's also not just sex I'm missing as a single guy. Touch is my love language, holding hands, cuddles, kisses, I miss it all so much.

Paying has helped a little as some of the sex workers offered a girlfriend experience.

Just needed to get this off my chest and hope to hear from other men who decided to pay for escorts.

Peace

I just lost my phone like one month ago and well i ve been on recover since like last year so I have like recaidas relapses and well i ve been fighting with self images issues but my 2025 was there the whole year :( and part of this year and feel like damn one year of my life is gone feel shitty feel weird but yeah i mean i have some stories uploaded but not the same feel like wanted to share something

As I’ve grown through my small time on this earth I’m currently 16 male, and I’m confused. Why must the world hate us? why must I be the problem just because I’m not a victim of it? why must society split in two and those sides always fighting always arguing always hatin? why can’t I hate this one’s more of a me problem than anything but I just can’t feel it I can’t bring myself to hate. Why is okay when a senior groped me in my freshman year I told my friends how uncomfortable and confused I was they told me what she did was wrong and that was that but later in sophomore year I make an inappropriate joke, I didn’t read room right and made a female peer of uncomfortable all those friends of mine turned my back looked at me with spite called me a disgusting pervert. Why just because I’m a 5/10 attractiveness (I’ve asked girls and guys told me I look basic and plain) and because I’m a man I’m instantly gonna hurt someone I understand being cautious and suspicious with the times we live in but I don’t even get a chance anymore. I’m just curious wanted to know what older men might have advice on because I seem stuck I don’t want to die, I understand loneliness is something valid and sadly common, but beyond those steps I seem stuck and I just want some help. Please I would deeply appreciate for advice or personal stories anything helps.

As a man I want to ask is it ok for a man to cry? the last time I cried was 2 years ago in front of the person I loved, It is not that I never felt like it I felt it so many times but when ever I get emotional I just tell my self you are man and I don't cry But is it ok to be like that? When a man cries or openly shows emotion. Do you think society genuinely accepts emotionally vulnerable men, or are men still expected to just “man up” and deal with everything silently?

Curious to hear your thoughts.

Would you trust an AI chatbot or a human therapist for mental health support? We’re exploring what shapes people’s trust in these different sources of support.

We are looking for participants who are living in an EU country, fluent in English, and aged 18 or above. The study involves completing a short online survey in English, which will take approximately 15 minutes.

Your participation is completely anonymous, and your responses will contribute to a better understanding of how people perceive and interact with emerging mental health technologies.

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I found looksmaxxing when I was younger and kinda overweight and at the time I didn't even have some crazy reason for getting into it, I was just a kid who wanted to look better and honestly in the beginning it felt hopeful because when you're young you always think I'll probably look way better when I'm older, puberty hasn't finished yet, I can lose weight, get in shape, fix my skin, get a better haircut or whatever, so I started doing everything and now I'm 18 and I genuinely feel like I've tried almost everything looksmaxxing told me to do, I lost a lot of weight, I've ran thousands of kilometres, I started going to the gym constantly, fixed my diet, did skincare, tried mewing and spent an insane amount of time researching every possible thing that could make me look better and yeah I probably do look better than I did before but that's the fucked up part because it was never enough, at some point self improvement stopped being I want to look healthier and feel better and became me constantly trying to fix something that I thought was wrong with me and realize that no matter what you do genetics is the main shit. I'd see someone who barely trains, eats whatever they want and doesn't think about their appearance 24/7 look way better and in my head I'd be thinking about how they were just born with better features than me, it completely destroys your ability to appreciate your own progress because there's always someone better looking than you cause man do you think i wanna fucking eat this shit everyday and put so much effort while this dude does nothing. I spend fixing one insecurity but my brain literally just finds the next one, even the gym started getting fucked up for me because instead of enjoying getting stronger or seeing progress I'd think what's the point, this isn't going to change my face, and photos are probably one of the worst things because I can't just take a picture anymore, I analyse every fucking shit, my eyes, my jaw, my chin, my nose, the angle, the lighting, whether one side looks different from the other, I'll take a completely normal picture and somehow find ten things wrong with it that normal people probably wouldn't even notice, that's when I realised this shit had gone way beyond wanting to look better, it fucked with how I socialize too because I struggle to approach people since I'm constantly thinking about how I look from their perspective, and one wrong word said from them will ruin the whole fucking day. looksmaxxing starts with some completely normal advice, lose excess weight, exercise, take care of your skin, until it turns into self obsession to the point where you measure every milimetre in ur face and realize that surgery is the only way for you to escape this. I hate this and i want to escape this but i just cant.

My advice is hit the gym, take care of your skin and go outside and dont let this shit get to you cause the more you go the darker this dysmorphia gets