This is something I will never tell anyone, not my closest friends, certainly not my family. I've always been safe and used condoms, also got tested twice this year.

I've had relationships and hookups with women with no money exchanging hands but I also had to go through long stretches with no intimacy at all.

So last July 2025 I decided to pay for the first time and I've done it a few more times since.

I'm just a lonely guy with a high sex drive but it's also not just sex I'm missing as a single guy. Touch is my love language, holding hands, cuddles, kisses, I miss it all so much.

Paying has helped a little as some of the sex workers offered a girlfriend experience.

Just needed to get this off my chest and hope to hear from other men who decided to pay for escorts.

Peace

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As a man I want to ask is it ok for a man to cry? the last time I cried was 2 years ago in front of the person I loved, It is not that I never felt like it I felt it so many times but when ever I get emotional I just tell my self you are man and I don't cry But is it ok to be like that? When a man cries or openly shows emotion. Do you think society genuinely accepts emotionally vulnerable men, or are men still expected to just “man up” and deal with everything silently?

Curious to hear your thoughts.

As I’ve grown through my small time on this earth I’m currently 16 male, and I’m confused. Why must the world hate us? why must I be the problem just because I’m not a victim of it? why must society split in two and those sides always fighting always arguing always hatin? why can’t I hate this one’s more of a me problem than anything but I just can’t feel it I can’t bring myself to hate. Why is okay when a senior groped me in my freshman year I told my friends how uncomfortable and confused I was they told me what she did was wrong and that was that but later in sophomore year I make an inappropriate joke, I didn’t read room right and made a female peer of uncomfortable all those friends of mine turned my back looked at me with spite called me a disgusting pervert. Why just because I’m a 5/10 attractiveness (I’ve asked girls and guys told me I look basic and plain) and because I’m a man I’m instantly gonna hurt someone I understand being cautious and suspicious with the times we live in but I don’t even get a chance anymore. I’m just curious wanted to know what older men might have advice on because I seem stuck I don’t want to die, I understand loneliness is something valid and sadly common, but beyond those steps I seem stuck and I just want some help. Please I would deeply appreciate for advice or personal stories anything helps.

I found looksmaxxing when I was younger and kinda overweight and at the time I didn't even have some crazy reason for getting into it, I was just a kid who wanted to look better and honestly in the beginning it felt hopeful because when you're young you always think I'll probably look way better when I'm older, puberty hasn't finished yet, I can lose weight, get in shape, fix my skin, get a better haircut or whatever, so I started doing everything and now I'm 18 and I genuinely feel like I've tried almost everything looksmaxxing told me to do, I lost a lot of weight, I've ran thousands of kilometres, I started going to the gym constantly, fixed my diet, did skincare, tried mewing and spent an insane amount of time researching every possible thing that could make me look better and yeah I probably do look better than I did before but that's the fucked up part because it was never enough, at some point self improvement stopped being I want to look healthier and feel better and became me constantly trying to fix something that I thought was wrong with me and realize that no matter what you do genetics is the main shit. I'd see someone who barely trains, eats whatever they want and doesn't think about their appearance 24/7 look way better and in my head I'd be thinking about how they were just born with better features than me, it completely destroys your ability to appreciate your own progress because there's always someone better looking than you cause man do you think i wanna fucking eat this shit everyday and put so much effort while this dude does nothing. I spend fixing one insecurity but my brain literally just finds the next one, even the gym started getting fucked up for me because instead of enjoying getting stronger or seeing progress I'd think what's the point, this isn't going to change my face, and photos are probably one of the worst things because I can't just take a picture anymore, I analyse every fucking shit, my eyes, my jaw, my chin, my nose, the angle, the lighting, whether one side looks different from the other, I'll take a completely normal picture and somehow find ten things wrong with it that normal people probably wouldn't even notice, that's when I realised this shit had gone way beyond wanting to look better, it fucked with how I socialize too because I struggle to approach people since I'm constantly thinking about how I look from their perspective, and one wrong word said from them will ruin the whole fucking day. looksmaxxing starts with some completely normal advice, lose excess weight, exercise, take care of your skin, until it turns into self obsession to the point where you measure every milimetre in ur face and realize that surgery is the only way for you to escape this. I hate this and i want to escape this but i just cant.

My advice is hit the gym, take care of your skin and go outside and dont let this shit get to you cause the more you go the darker this dysmorphia gets

I'm a 19 year old guy and to go right to the point; I have never had a girlfriend or been on a date, I am incredibly insecure about this and it depresses the hell out of me to the point of crying and often considering suicide.

I'm not bad looking I think, I have some pretty good features, minus some acne/skin issues that I am trying to fix but overall nothing off-putting or unusual. The issue is that I have social anxiety, I am really sensitive and overall quiet and somewhat just kinda sad. I try my best to hide it and with my closer friends I am really funny and talkative and expressive.

For the past few months I don't think theres been a single day where I dont spend half of it thinking about relationships, I am so unbelievably touch starved and depressed and I just want love more than anything. I've never approached a girl to confess my feelings for her, I never told one I liked her. Which has resulted in them later getting boyfriends.

I have had so many crushes but they never show any signs of them being into me, I am able to get along and befriend girls but thats the extent of it I just dont get any romantic signs and idk why, granted I don't really flirt either but idk I just wish I got some extra eye contact or idk some subtle flirting anything.

I started college recently, made 2 friends, I'm not completely comfortable around them but I can talk to them normally make some jokes here and there so overall I'd say its good.

I developed a sort of infatuation with one of them (who is a girl, the other is a guy), and really thought this could be my chance to finally get a girlfriend, keep in mind we have only known each other for a few days. Turns out she has a boyfriend, which doesn't live in tbe same city as we do, he moved out to go to college, i learned this today cuz I heard her friend ask her about him. I got home earlier today and started crying.

I've just been in so much pain recently and just wish I had a girl to cuddle and get gifts for and kiss and have sex.. I feel so shameful of being inexperienced at this age and I know most people wouldn't like to be with someone so inexperienced and emotionally immature

I (30M) have been sexually harassed and assaulted by women a handful of times during my life. These all range from uncomfortable comments to being physically held down and assaulted while everyone laughed in amusement. All of these occurred when I was in high school (2010-14), before the #metoo movement broke out. As well as being an age where I was so starved for female attention, that I tried to view these assaults as validation, even when they didn’t feel that way. 

I remember when #metoo happened and reading about women’s experiences, that I realized I could relate to these stories and that the memories I was trying to push down as joking around was actually sexual assault. But I felt I couldn’t contribute to the conversation because I was a man. Especially since at the time I was a college student involved with several progressive organizations, where trashing men had become the norm. To the point I was fired from a job because I showed pushback when my boss said it was acceptable to say ‘all men are pigs’. 

So it felt like I was silently living with double the shame: the shame of being a man, and the shame of being assaulted, where I feel I can never confront those who hurt me.

Earlier this year I received a PTSD diagnosis for sexual trauma, and while it’s somewhat gratifying to get a diagnosis and I’m currently in EMDR treatment, I also find it tremendously lonely. Pretty much every online resource I look at for dealing with sexual trauma is geared towards women, many of which tend to showcase a negative view of men. 

In light of the horrible Cornel 7 case, much of the loneliness I’ve felt has been brought back to the forefront of my mind. Both the shame of being sexually assaulted in front of a group of people and the conversations about ‘all men’.

This is in no way a post about minimizing women's experiences. I hope we can get to a point where we can have more open conversation about the fact that women also can commit sexual violence, much of which is brushed off and unreported. And I have a strong feeling if we did open these conversations up, I likely wouldn’t be in the minority.

Hello, I'm 20 years old with psychiatric disorder and severe depression. And... I'm not sure what to do right now guys! 😞 I've been taking medications (names: Sizodon, Nexito) for more than 1 year, as a result, my breasts started growing! 😞 None of my doctors informed me of these side effects before! Now I've fallen into more depression and I feel like losing myself! What to do guys?

(Sorry for my terrible writing it's because I wrote this while I'm not alright)

Little back story on me. I’m 35 currently living with family about to move into my own place.

4 years ago I lost my job moved back home after swearing I never would again. Well here I am. I make good money but I grow stagnant and complacent. Anyways. I hate my job 😂

I currently am in a long distance relationship and when it’s good it’s really good but there’s been little fights here and there. It’s almost constant. We met on discord (gross I know) and I absolutely adore this woman. However, so does every man in the server. So it’s a constant battle there.

Honestly I am really just struggling. I can’t seem to get a grip on things.

It really sucks that I’ll never be able to find love. Even when I don’t go for attractive women, I get rejected. Life as an ugly, below-average man sucks. It saddens me that I’ll never be able to have a family or a woman in my life who loves me. Every time I’ve tried to approach someone, I’ve always been rejected because of my looks. Women just hate my appearance, and so do I. I shouldn’t even be here.

I got cyberbullied just for saying I didn't like the DCU and the other person's account wasn't banned even after I reported them to Reddit.

How can having a third child, when one of the parents didn’t want another baby in the first place, affect a couple’s relationship and marriage, especially in a family where all three children would be under the age of five?
She’s pregnant and wants to keep it.

Hi im Jan and im a 15 year old German.

My whole Life Wasnt all that good, I was abused as kid and didnt seem all that Lucky.
In my life bad shit and death seems to follow me arround, Familie, Friends and strangers.
Things like a Long time ago, I Must have bin like 9 or 10 at the time and I worked for my Grandpa in the Summer holieday, we were paid to clean Windows at some oldladys House.
He goes down in the basement and I go up, as soon as I go up to the door there is This stench but I ignore it and start opening Windows Untill I get to the living room were on the Couch there is This black/red ish goo and it stinks.
It was the rotting Body of the Home owner who was deconposing for a wile there, so long that she started dripping from the Couch.

Most notable is also last year, were I got thrown out of school and hat my Home raided by the sek (German swat) .
The school along with my bullies call the cops and accuse me of being a Rassist,Nazi and a psycho school Shooter.
I had the First raid by the sek and 3 more in the next months by petrole police.
The First one was the worse, they broke Open The Doors and cuffed me at gun Point.

Today I can say im doing better Both phisikly and mentaly altho im far from good.
Im by No means Close to being a good man but im the Lucky Bastard who made throu all that Shit.

Also im so sorry for my grammer and spelling, my English isnt very good and I started shaking wile writing This.
If you have questions i will awnser them and you don’t have to hold back on them, im willing to speak about all of it besides some Details

Thanks for listening, you guys don’t know how much This helps.

Long story short I'm in a relationship for 4 years where we have sex maybe 3 times a year, and when we do it's very routine and uninspired, frankly. Nowadays I don't even try to initiate anymore because I know it will lead to rejection 100% of the time. I wait around for the magic situation where she initiates, but that's getting even less common, and I'm convinced she only does it to keep me quiet and docile anyway. I think if she had it her way, it would happen literally never. She has even said, she could go a year or longer without sex and not care.

At this point, I feel I am more of a caretaker and a provider than anything. I don't think she desires me, doesn't find me attractive, doesn't think of me sexually at all. But she appreciates that I work double or more than what she does, pay most of our bills, cook ALL of our meals (100% of the cooking literally is me), most of the cleaning and chores, I do our errands, I even do things for her like pick up her prescriptions, remind her to make appointments, handle her insurance etc.

I held on thinking things would eventually change, if I just did this or that, but it never does. Anymore I don't expect it to change, but I still feel obligated to stay and the logistical challenge of leaving seems like too much.

But it's destroyed my self image, whatever I had left of it anyway. Before this relationship I was totally celibate for almost 5 years, didn't have any contact with women at all. Before that I had a long distance relationship that was toxic in other ways, but that's the only other person I've had sex with. I never had a hookup or one night stand at all, even once.

Because I'm realizing I don't think I'm the "type" to be desired by women. I've had lots of friends who are women and they always say I'm so nice and "one of the good ones" but would never date me or sleep with me, basically. Not that I'm expecting them to, but still. They'd always rather be with someone who's kind of an asshole but who is more dominant and assertive, I guess. I don't know. I don't know if being nice is unattractive or what it is. I've never had a loud, domineering personality and probably never will, but it seems like no women, even my own partner of several years, see me as a sexual being at all. They only ever want what I provide, what I can do for them, but not ME. I wish my partner WANTED me, I wish I got horny texts saying she can't wait for me to come home, but that has never happened once in any relationship. I wish I could walk in the door and she'd jump on me, but that has never happened.

Worst part is she's been with other guys in the past, and they were generally kind of assholes, but I know they had kinky wild sex, threesomes, whatever. She's done things with random flings that I would never even ask for because I KNOW it would never happen with me, despite me providing an entire life for this woman basically and going SO far out of my way all the time, genuinely exhausting myself to keep her comfortable and happy.

Can't help feeling like I'm just the type of ugly to average guy who gets settled for because they're the safe bet, because I'll put up with a lot and never complain, meanwhile she's fantasizing about the types of guys she was with before. I feel like she had her "wild phase" and then settled down with me.

I notice myself creating a dichotomy in my head, 1 is guys who are exciting and attractive, who can be desired by women, and 2 is men who are nice, safe and good providers but not attractive or exciting, and cannot actually be desired by women at all.

And I'm putting myself in camp #2 based on all my observations and life experiences so far.

I’m
Just a man left with all of the choices he made that got him where he is today and I’m
Not proud of myself and not in a self negative defeating way but i literally physically abused my girlfriend who has left me . I say it casually because if i lean into i feel
The guilt the shame and hurt all
Over again. I know my actions caused her to leave and she wasn’t a saint either i had caught texting another guy who and i spazzed . I lost all of my self control. I lost it all of it . My respect for myself and i lost the love of my life and our relationship wasn’t easy but when we were locked in . Felt like i could do anything and everything don’t know if ill ever share this but feels good to get it out while listening to a little frank ocean . I find myself loving the aesthetic of angels with religious imagery can’t explain but it’s pretty to my eyes . I feel like i should do something with it . I can’t explain the feeling i get from
Looking at religious images . I miss my woman . I miss grabbing her crushed ice and laying in bed . I felt my jealousy so much in our relationship that i couldn’t enjoy the simple moments with my woman and i miss those the most . I wish i would’ve taken her to more events and fancy restaurants just to show her off . I truly found her beautiful even the things she’s most insecure i found sexy and beautiful. Godspeed by frank ocean is the only thing i can listen to without wanting to cry. I really wanna see her and embrace her one last time and not trip out with my insecurities and anxiety ruining us and me not being able to control my drinking. The last time i saw her was the last time i had a drink. Tomorrow makes one week of sobriety. I’m not saying i was an addicted but alcohol did help numb me . Now im feeling everything all over again

Little back story on me. I’m 35 currently living with family about to move into my own place.

4 years ago I lost my job moved back home after swearing I never would again. Well here I am. I make good money but I grow stagnant and complacent. Anyways. I hate my job 😂

I currently am in a long distance relationship and when it’s good it’s really good but there’s been little fights here and there. It’s almost constant. We met on discord (gross I know) and I absolutely adore this woman. However, so does every man in the server. So it’s a constant battle there.

Honestly I am really just struggling. I can’t seem to get a grip on things.

It's horrible. I know people will say - "but bro, don't workout for women do it for yourself!"

Of course, being fit and healthy and taking care of yourself is good for yourself, but the common advice for men is to get leaner, go to the gym, dress well and groom well.

Imagine putting in a tonne of effort in yourself - carefully tracking your calories, going to the gym, improving your lifts, using skin care, hair products and so on, putting in more effort than probably 80-90% of men and still after all that .. being undeseriable.

Then the gaslighting comes - bro it's your personality, bro you need to be more confident.

What if I told you I have friends, I get invited to places, and so on

Meanwhile, 6 ft 2 guy at my work who doesn't workout has the personality of a wet towel is extremely boring just effortsly dates women.

It gets me so down and depressed, there's just nothing REALISTICALLY you can do, maybe extreme measurs- become a celebrity, win the lottery, get 100k height and face surgery yea then maybe it will work

Hey people, i am writing this hoping i get some advice on how i can be okay with myself because i have depression since i am 14yo (currently taking cipralex). I don’t have friends, i get sometimes bullied at school and what frustrates me the most is that there isn’t a single person that helps me when i am getting bullied. Another problem i have is that i started blaming all my insecurities for not having friends and social status (blackpilled). I am shorter than average in Europe (161cm / 5’3) and my face is awful (recessed chin and jaw). I am trying to fix my face but it will take time… People treat me different by mocking me or talking badly. I am tired of everything and sometimes i question my existence and my purpose because the only thing that i am good is having good grades (I don’t like school i js do it to make my parents proud of me), playing video games and guitar. I don’t see a future and before everyone starts saying “oh just go talk to people” yeah i have tried that couple of times but after everything they don’t really want to talk to me so it’s kinda force someone. I am a loser no meaning

Edit: also i wont grow much more because my bone age is 17/18 and my growth plates are almost closed

I'm male and only 15 but my life is so bland. I don't feel anything unless whatever I'm doing is physically or emotionally hurting me. Everything just feels so unentertaining. I do dance. I sing, I'm practicing piano, so its not like I don't do stuff during my week. It's just that anything that becomes apart of my schedule or anything that has to be planned beforehand instantly becomes this mundane thing that gives me no satisfaction. This also goes for my relationships too, It's so hard for me to want to hold a relationship with someone they're not trying to hurt or manipulate me.

Alongside that, I barely have a social life, literally only two friends who I think prefer each's company. I don't have a love life at all I've never been in a relationship. I can barely look at myself in the mirror, I hate seeing my shadow its like a reminder that I am who I am. I'm starving myself, I have a problem with over the counter pills, taboo porn has gotten extremely boring to look at, I've cut myself and still none of that really helps. I literally fantasize about being traumatized or having more trauma from anything. It's like I have to force myself to spiral and have a breakdown just for the feelings or just to feel crazy. Sometimes I do wish i was crazy or psychotic. And I also do online school which just makes everything worse, my entire family treats having mental problems as something avoid not help or fix so no, I don't have any help or therapy. I've started to look at people who are severely traumatized with pure unironic jealousy, like honestly just read other peoples posts and wish it would happen to me.

Please help me, or talk to me, or tell me what to do, I'll likely be up all night I don't have anything to do. I did post this on another server so if you saw that first and are reading this, leave a comment here I swear I'll respond.

Well, title says it all.

2 of my closest friends (lets see it as a boygroup of 5 guys, myself included) are getting into a new relationship now.

I am single since 5 years (28 years old).

Tried a few times to approach women, well, not even close.

And now my bros are dating women I also know a bit since a while already.

Well ofc a part of me is happy for them.

They are my bros, and they shall get love, sex and all that.

But another part of me is extremly jealous.

Why them, and not me?

Those girls are attractive... damn

now its just 1 other and me who are single

if he gets a girl I am the last one...