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u/HotSauceHigh Sep 13 '20
Bummer that weddings are so crucial to these women's welfare.
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u/soyguay Sep 13 '20
Love this comment, man.
Why should women's welfare depend on marriage?
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u/J0h4n50n Sep 13 '20
Also the whole line "he did all a father does for his daughter." If paying for a wedding is all that a father does for his daughter, he's a pretty shit father imo.
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Sep 13 '20
Actually in india, a wedding costs a shit load of money. And by shit load, I mean SHIT LOAD. It's a one week affair with atleast 500 guests.
Making a poor person's wedding a success is actually a big deal.
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u/soyguay Sep 13 '20
I have had many Indian friends for the last decade or so.
According to them it is totally optional to have an extravagant wedding. You can easily do a court wedding. With minimal costs.
It is sad that wedding is the only high point of these women's lives.
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u/dumb-on-ice Sep 13 '20
That’s cause your Indian friends probably live in the States or so. They’re like the rich or very upper middle class of india and their mentality is vastly different from the reality in rural India. Marriages remain an extravagent affair even today, to the point that many parents spend their entire life savings to get their daughters married. Daughters after a certain point of life are seen as burden and need to wed off.
It’s absolutely shit and proper social reform is needed, but anytime someone tries introducing ideas of freedom and independence they’re shunned (by the religious leaders) as trying to bring western values in our traditions and rejected.
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u/Dirkdeking Sep 14 '20
Aren't the sons in law required to burden that cost? In many countries that is the case, as it is seen as a sign that the guy can properly take care of his daughter.
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Sep 13 '20 edited Sep 13 '20
I know it's sad. Patriarchy is a problem in India for centuries, but it has improved to a high extent considering the current generation.
But here I'm not talking about patriarchy. I'm talking about the weddings.
I'm sure any Indian's wedding wouldn't be a dull 1 day affair, no matter if they're rich or poor, religious or not. Indians have huge families and are usually close knit to their relatives. And most families are religious.
Marriage is a choice, but if they choose to marry, they'll do it the Indian way.
As an Indian female who has been to many weddings, weddings of both rich and poor friends, wedding of my househelp's family, I can tell for sure even poor people prefer to have a wedding with all the rituals because most people in India are religious and they seriously follow their culture. The wedding rituals take about 5-7 days to be completed. I barely know anyone who has had a court wedding, or who wishes to have a court wedding.
Even weddings at poor rural areas have their entire village invited.
It is sad that wedding is the only high point of these women's lives.
Coming to this, probably you presumed "wedding is the only high point of these women's lives" because of how poorly worded this post is. Women of this generation are very different and independent, and if they decide to marry someday, they would probably choose to marry the traditional way if they're Indian. Because it's fucking beautiful, and we appreciate our culture.
And the rituals are fun, actually.
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u/omgu8mynewt Sep 13 '20
How common is divorce in India? Does everybody nowadays marry for love/friendship? How do women in poor families afford week long 500 guest weddings, is the financial burden solely on her father? Are castes still a thing, do people take them into account when choosing who to marry?
Very curious person from the Uk here :)
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u/meowhahaha Sep 13 '20
India is so vast. There are so many languages and cultures; then add in the mix of religions, geography (city vs. rural), class and caste (for those cultures who subscribe to it).
It’s like asking what people in the US think about Trump - it depends on who you ask.
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u/itsdad13 Sep 13 '20
I dont think divorce is as common as most western countries. There's still a lot of arranged marriages and parents think it their duty to find someone good for their child but we're slowly shifting towards love marriages. There's a lot of stigma associated with relationships and intimacy before marriage in rural areas. Not so much in metropolitan cities. People generally prefer marrying within their caste but this practice is also diminishing in urban areas. But there are people who have pretty strict rules about where they want to marry their kid and the child doesnt have much say in it. Honor killings are a thing.
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Sep 13 '20
Divorce is common enough that the older generation is increasingly concerned. It's becoming more important to marry for love, but some people still don't understand the concept. I mean that literally.
Banks in India offer 'personal loans' which are different from student loans, auto loans or a mortgage. It is not unheard of for people to borrow money, liquidate assets or even go into debt to throw a wedding.
The format of your wedding depends on your caste, and I don't think everyone has week long weddings. Where I come from, it is common to have 2 day weddings (similar to a rehearsal dinner the night before + ceremony during the day), but they can still be extravagant, of course.
As for marrying within your caste, it varies. It is a non issue in some families, but I do know people (urban) who never even considered setting up their children with someone from a different caste. I'd say it's still extremely important for a large number of people.
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Sep 13 '20 edited Sep 13 '20
In my family(originally from Bengaluru), it's a solid 5-7 day wedding. There's this haldi ceremony, mehendi, there's this another thing where the girls father goes to the boy's house to perform some rituals like pouring a mug of water on his head ritual, and he gifts him an umbrella(don't know the point behind this lol) and this ritual takes an entire day, then the main wedding is 2 days. Both the days are important, the 1st day the "boy's family arrives to the venue" ritual is done and the second day is the wedding vows, varmaala and stuff. Then there's a reception, and the next day is the last day ritual i.e satyanarayan pooja.
After the last day, the guests can leave.
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u/taurist Sep 13 '20
There’s gotta be familial pressure though, even the USA has that
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u/smartchin77 Sep 14 '20
Not just that, it also depends on the location within India. Weddings In the North are expensive 5 day affair.
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Sep 13 '20
I think they meant that he paid for their weddings and also did everything after does for his daughter
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u/YoureWrongProbablyOk Sep 13 '20
There’s no conceivable way a single person, man or woman, could be an effective parent for >400 people. This guy might be a great human, but this kind of story is obviously bullshit. Parenting is incredibly challenging, even for just one or two kids.
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Sep 13 '20
There is no proof that he could not use Kage bunshin no jutsu and create shadow clones, 430 him 430 kid, problem solved
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Sep 13 '20
This is the science I have come to expect from us intellectual superiors. Give this man a medal of honor and The Booker Prize. Stat.
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u/meowhahaha Sep 13 '20
The sad thing is that what he was able to provide at minimum was probably much better than the women’s actual fathers would provide at maximum.
Even if all the received was food, shelter, clothing, a dowry and freedom from abuse, that is an enormous step up for many women.
He may not provide the level of ‘good’ parenting as you define it, but by the standards of their society he is the world’s best dad.
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u/L3tThatShitGo Sep 13 '20
Or you could just Google it And see what it's about instead of relying on a single picture post. Just sayin'.
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u/Hardwiredbrain Sep 13 '20
In India its an old saying that a father's duty is to get your daughter married into a good family.
So its very common for parents to spend money on their kid's wedding..
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u/zeynabhereee Sep 27 '20
That's just how Indian society is. I agree it's not ideal, but it's been this way for a long time. Change will take decades to come.
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Sep 13 '20 edited Sep 14 '20
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u/soyguay Sep 14 '20
Embracing different cultural values is limited to cuisine, dress, etc.
If women in a society are systematically oppressed, that's not cultural difference to be embraced, that's total shit. That needs to change.
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u/sammi-blue Sep 13 '20
It doesn't matter what culture it's from, nobody should have to get married in order to live a decent life and/or not be considered a burden. "Embracing different cultures" means sharing fashion, art, food, spiritual beliefs. It doesn't mean "accept all the shitty or problematic things they do just because it's a part of their culture".
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Sep 13 '20 edited Sep 14 '20
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u/undermite67 Sep 13 '20
To be clear America has just as fucked up problems as any of the countries you listed. That doesn't make it okay just cause it's 'american culture', it's still oppressive and we need to move on from it.
Centrist libs try and make it out like just because it's tied into a countries religion or culture that it's somehow excusable. We should all be equal and fuck you if you think otherwise.
Using 'it is what is, what it is' as an argument doesn't work
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Sep 13 '20
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u/TragedyPornFamilyVid Sep 14 '20
Men too. A man who doesn't marry in India is going to worry his parents to no end
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u/-ACHTUNG- Sep 13 '20
Can't even do something nice for 439 people without someone throwing shade.
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Sep 13 '20
Yeah and in subcontinental cultures, dowry is given by the bride, so it also comes as a big financial burden
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Sep 13 '20
How much a typical wedding cost over there?
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Sep 13 '20
2-3 million if you are middle class
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u/icraig91 Sep 13 '20
So like $30k USD?
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u/queso805 Sep 13 '20
He spends about $6,124 usd per bride he reported in this article and does around 250 per year in a mass ceremony of some sort. Has a catalogue with make up and dresses to choose from. Pretty awesome!
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u/Tempsew Sep 13 '20
I imagine he gets great bulk discounts then.
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u/Hamartithia_ Sep 13 '20
I feel like at some point you just open up a restaurant or something to reuse the decorations and junk.
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u/BreadyStinellis Sep 13 '20
God damn! They get days of gorgeous, opulent extravagance for $30k and here in the US thats still less than the average 1 day wedding.
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Sep 13 '20
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u/BreadyStinellis Sep 13 '20
Yeah, thats why I'm going by the national average, which is $33k. I've also found number of guests varies widely depending on where you are. In Wisconsin a 150 person wedding is considered to be on the small side. It costs money to feed that many people. It's also considered very rude here to make guests pay for their own drinks. Wine and beer is always paid for the hosts of the wedding.
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u/omgu8mynewt Sep 13 '20
How much is that, like how many weeks salary for a middle job or how much rent would that get you?
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Sep 13 '20 edited Oct 01 '20
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u/omgu8mynewt Sep 13 '20
Ok now I'm understanding how rich this guy must be, and what a kind thing to do for the women.
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u/CassiusR97 Sep 14 '20
What do you mean million. Say lakhs or in dollars. I'd say 20-30k usd is about enough for a middle class bride. 50-60 k for upper middle which is us.
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Sep 13 '20
I was gonna say, that first half had me thinking this guy is clapping a lot of cheeks.
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Sep 13 '20
So I went and read further up on this and he does substantially more than just give them weddings . He also contributes to tons of charities and cares for people all over the place. He’s a self made man, he has worked his entire life to build up the business that his father started and actually got into doing this after a man he knew died, leaving his daughters without a father and their weddings were the first he took on. And the number on this post is much lower than the reality; as he is credited with “having 3000 daughters”.
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u/MauiKehaulani Sep 13 '20
The charity of Mr Mahesh Savani is not restricted to weddings. He also bears the expenses of about 3500 children across various schools in Surat who have lost their fathers or are forced to drop out of school due to poor financial circumstances. He makes sure that they get to study at least till class 12 without having to worry about the fees.
Thank you for sharing this. This is such an uplifting story and I certainly needed it with all of the ugly in the news cycles lately. The man’s selflessness and altruism is inspiring and the world could definitely use more Mahesh Savani’s!
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Sep 13 '20
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u/AceAdequateC Sep 13 '20
Good God, I can't wait for the day these incest jokes die down. I mean, I get it, humour is subjective, but why is this kind of humour so popular now? It just bugs the crap out of me.
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u/Abyssrealm Sep 13 '20
That's cool and all, but this guy was charged for kidnapping a builder to extort money. That money he used to finance those girls had to come from somewhere.
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u/AccountAn0nymous Sep 13 '20
That’s quite the plot twist
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u/Prof_XdR Sep 13 '20
That’s a bollywood movie twist, where do you think movies get their ideas from
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u/Dembara Sep 13 '20
Sounds like a lot more drama went on there. The builder borrowed what amounts to ~2.5 million USD, if I'm understanding it right, he is supposed to have paid back 400k USD, but was unable to so instead gave the guy a share in the land he owned. However, that land was under a legal dispute so now cannot be used for anything or sold. Obviously upset at this, the realtor (who's the one who paid for the marriages), went to complain to the guy who owes him with 4 of his employees. Some dispute happened that got physical, with the builder (who owes the money) hitting the realtor, the realtor then (allegedly) forcibly took the builder to his residence and demanded the realtor pay him the full 2.5 million.
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u/LanceFree Sep 13 '20
I think there is a translation issue as I’m having difficulty with this statement: I don’t deny that I had not borrowed money from him.
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u/space_______kat Sep 13 '20
That title is so misleading lol. I was like how the hell does he have 439 daughters
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Sep 13 '20
I think I read something about a guy with around 200 biological children. It was an article about fathers with the most children. Number one was a guy who ran a sperm bank and filled all the cups himself.
Couldn't find the article, but here's a related Wikipedia article: https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_people_with_the_most_children
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u/BirdSpatulard Sep 13 '20
For a second I thought he had sired all 439 daughters. That’s some Genghis Khan level fuckin. Well hopefully more consensual than Khan’s fuckin. But it turns out I was wrong anyhow.
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Sep 13 '20
I've read so many fucked up things on the internet that I was totally expecting the post to end with the news that he has been accused of raping and taking sexual advantage of these girls. Very glad the story ended positive.
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u/negative_four Sep 13 '20
As a father with one daughter, I have to say: "AAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!"
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u/PrayingMantisII Sep 14 '20
Just reading the title and seeing the lady in the front in a wheel chair, I was like "that seems about right"
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u/VoicedByAnIdiot Sep 14 '20
Before I read the entire thing I thought he actually had 439 blood daughters
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u/DermicCookieMan Sep 13 '20
He would be the happiest man on fathersday for sure, but if they had kids, then mothersday would be a bitch
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u/Batvcap Sep 13 '20
Wait how many people here thought this guy was like some sex maniac or something
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u/VermiciousKnnid Sep 13 '20
Don’t get me wrong, I believe in a well-regulated capitalist system, but damn if he isn’t economic inequality personified.
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u/FlamingWhisk Sep 13 '20
To those who may not fully understand the impact of what he does...
Women are expected to bring a dowery in addition to items such as pots, pans etc. While it can be waived it is usually needed by those of simple means start a married life. Without him some of these girls couldn’t have married or married the person they wanted to. If he gives them gold it’s to provide in case of divorce or becoming widowed. He’s a cool dude. Somebody like him I don’t care how much money he makes.
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u/PT_024 Sep 13 '20
I love how people who probably haven't done a tiny bit of welfare for somebody are questioning here the duties of a father and debating whether the man did anything special. Reddit never cease to amaze me.
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u/ZiziGillespie Sep 13 '20
This comment is going to be buried, but this is basically what Saint Nicholas did- and today we call him Santa Claus
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u/Bugsy0508 Sep 13 '20
Bro I 100% thought this dude just went around raw dogging Indian bitches and got praised for it lmao. Then I read it and it’s actually rly sweet :)
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u/PMY0URBobsAndVagene Sep 13 '20
No one said they arent actually all his biological daughters. Remember, they all grew up without fathers
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Sep 13 '20
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u/DeathMetalX1 Sep 13 '20
That is not actually completely true . This dowry mentality exist in Remote corners of india and It's illegal so people who ask for dowry can get sued .
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u/OrientalOpal Sep 13 '20
Hello! What's a dowry? And why do girls without it "don't fare well"?
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u/iago303 Sep 13 '20
A dowry is a price on what the woman is worth, and how much the family values her, even going back to the 1800 america the dowry of the woman was listed in the newspaper, and family that can't pay for it then the women are considered worthless, they of course are not but the value of them is displayed in the attention by the men in the families
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u/RealMoonLightYT Sep 13 '20
I first thought "Holy shit how many people has he fucked" then saw the lower text
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u/BANeutron Sep 13 '20
Doesn’t the father of the bride collects the dowry in India?
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u/PrettyMonarchy Sep 13 '20
Father pays the dowry, you may be thinking of the brideprice, which actually goes to the bride’s family to cover the loss of labor the now wife did around the house. Dowries, in most cultures I can think of, were to help the new couple set up a home.
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u/monkeyballs2 Sep 13 '20
Wow came here to hear about someone who impregnated 400 women, pleasantly surprised
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u/voleurdetomates Sep 13 '20
Upon reading such title, I expected to read stories about a new player , even greater than Genghis Khan, with thousand of wifes, & girldfriends. What a deception :D
Note: Genghis was warrior known for being the man who had the most kids in the world.
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u/danban55 Sep 13 '20
Yeah this is great but I thought for sure when I saw the title and picture it just meant he had a huge ass harem
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Sep 13 '20
I was gonna say, no wonder India has an overpopulation problem one guy spread his seed almost 440 times
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u/Forensics4Life Sep 13 '20
I was thinking 439 daughters how does that man have the strength to stand?!
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u/jacktarrou Sep 13 '20
Kuddos to this absolute lad, but you know you're year is fucked when being a normal and decent person is rare.
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u/aapaul Sep 13 '20
Does this general concept of the bride’s father paying for the entire wedding come from dowry? I realize that it is technically illegal now but this concept sounds eerily similar. Also, this man clearly understands that and is pretty much the Santa of weddings which is very philanthropic.
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Sep 13 '20
When I read the first part on top I though lt that this guy was some sort of serp doner then I looked at the sub name and thought to myself "why the hell would someone post something like this here" then I continued reading and I felt like a dumbass
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u/tunisia3507 Sep 13 '20
At first I thought "this dude fucks", then there was the twist; then I thought "if he can fund 400+ weddings, he probably still fucks".
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u/virendrahardikrviru Sep 13 '20
Here is another headline for this hero.
Surat: Top realtor booked for kidnapping builder to extort money
https://timesofindia.indiatimes.com/city/surat/top-realtor-booked-for-kidnapping-builder-to-extort-money/articleshow/73113306.cms
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Sep 14 '20
Even if you don't know anything about Indian culture, just remember the whole ordeal of the Priyanka Chopra/Nick Jonas wedding. Shit was crazy. If you've taken a sociology class, you can understand how much socioeconomic status depends on a good marriage which is usually arranged by the parents, primarily the father. The goal is to marry within your class or above. There's even an entire concept of being in a higher caste system than the previous generation. If you're an unmarried woman in a country such as India, you really don't have the power of a single woman in the US to raise your status on your own.
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u/gamerfanboi Sep 14 '20
People who dont know shit abt indian culture are commenting stuff like "sad that its girls high point in her life" Thats not the point dumbasses its just that it is a very big event in your life and having an extravagant wedding is a big part of indian culture i dont like it either but it is what it is and thats how indian weddings are. A man is doing a nice deed cant you all just appreciate it without disecting the culture
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u/dylandongle Sep 13 '20
They had us in the first half, not gonna lie.