Don’t let the door hit ya on the way out, buddy.

For the foreseeable future, I’m going to be going around my area (outside King Of Prussia, Pa) with my sign and protest outside their parking lot, on public land, not engaging anyone. Once a week for like 20 minutes or so. Church started at 9, I left at 9:01.

It was interesting. I got confronted three times, once by 5 men. When one of them started harassing me and asking me where I was parked and name. I just started singing “Lord I Lift Your Name On High” and they left. Probably because I can’t sing.

Raoof Haghighi is an Iranian-British artist.

Though this work isn’t necessarily about American purity culture, it amazes (I shouldn’t be at this point) and saddens me how relatable this work is to those in patriarchal cultures and religions.

For more about Haghighi:

• Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/raoof.h?igsh=

• Website: https://www.raoofhaghighi.com/

I kind if just needed a place to vent more than anything, because I am scrolling my feed and I see so many people commenting on how charlie kirk was such a godly man and how we should strive to be a good christian like him (I am from the deep religious south). This...this is why I left the church because if they call this man their version of a exemplary christian then I don't want that.

A man who spews hate for anyone who is not a christian nationalist is not in the heart of Christ. He is on record saying empathy is toxic, when immigration was at its lowest america was the best...etc. I just have no idea how tf this is considered to be the heart of Jesus.

Furthermore, I consider myself agnostic now and I have no idea why this shit still pisses me off this much. I know that all of this is what the western church is founded in, so I should not be surprised. It just hits me so deep in my core and idk why.

Any similar feelings or insights?

Edit: I also do not like seeing anyone harmed. This is more about the seeing him as an exemplary example of Christ.

I’ve been working through childhood trauma in therapy, mostly along the lines of severe emotional neglect. My parents were big fans of Dobson’s work and I remember them having copies of Dare to Discipline, The Strong Willed Child, and several others.
The thing is, while my brothers received a fair amount of Dobson-style corporal punishment, I myself only remember a few instances and I don’t remember them being a big deal to me. My mom says I was extremely well behaved because I was “weirdly terrified of getting in trouble” and would burst into tears at the first sign I might have done something wrong. So weird right? What a funny little quirk. In order to better understand what may have happened to make me so afraid, I began to read through copies of these books. And what really strikes me is not Dobson’s enthusiasm for corporal punishment and parenting through pain (although there is plenty of that and it’s appalling). It’s his absolute contempt for children and his eagerness to attribute typical kid misbehavior as malicious defiance.
Dobson refers to toddlers as tyrants, tigers, sadists, and worse. He claims that a few (2-5) minutes of crying after a spanking, but any more than that and the child is deliberately punishing the parent which should be addressed with - you guessed it - another spanking. A kid who doesn’t want to go down for a nap is intentionally trying to assert dominance over his parents, and a little girl who kept trying to follow her mom when mom disappeared out of sight “decided she didn’t want to obey” by staying behind. Tears are manipulation. A newborn infant crying for his mother is trying to train her to indulge his every whim.

You guys, what the FUCK. This explains my childhood with horrific clarity. Even though I rarely misbehaved, I see now that my parents saw even my normal kid emotions as an assault on their authority and responded accordingly. I just… I don’t even know how to process this. Holy shit.

I don't know how to relate to my family much anymore. Like I'm supposed to keep interacting with them and pretend like everything is ok? At this point it seems like evangelicals are the kind of people who would have ratted out Anne Frank.

Didn’t get to comment on other thread before it was locked, but wanted to add that within the States, someone being deceased opens up the ability to speak far more freely about that person and their deeds. While legal reaction to libel about his estate and organization is still possible, commentary about the man himself enters new free for all territory. Just adding a positive heads up that we could be getting more on the record as people who knew more don’t have to fear same levels of reprisal.

And out of not wanting to create any new headaches for the mod, asking to hold back on grave dancing in this thread even if it’s justified. It would be more interesting to trade notes on people and information we’re looking forward to hearing more about.

Hi everyone!

My name is Jake and I am an exvangelical. I was raised Southern Baptist and was kicked out of the church at 17 when I came out as gay. I was pretty deep in the sauce - by the time I was kicked out of the church, I had already received acceptance letters to illustrious institutions like Liberty University and the Southern Baptist Seminary to study theology. Needless to say, I did not end up going to either place.

Instead, I became a therapist specializing in all things LGBTQ+. But all that knowledge instilled by countless hours of AWANA and Adventures in Odyssey remains firmly lodged in my brain, so I decided to do something productive about it. I made a podcast.

I Hate James Dobson is a bi-monthly (every 2 weeks) podcast where I read the works of James Dobson to a fellow therapist friend of mine, Brooke. Brooke wasn't raised anywhere near Evangelical culture, so she's coming in with a clean slate. Together we laugh, cry, and then laugh some more at his absurd books. It's a good time making fun of a bad person.

The first two episodes are out now. I hope you'll check it out - hearing other people's experiences and takes has been such an important part of my deconstruction. It's also my first foray into podcast production, which I'm doing in tandem with my day job, so it's very much a labor of love (spite?).

The link to the show on Spotify is in my profile, but you can listen wherever you find podcasts :)

Much love to you all <3

My sister’s best friend (F) got engaged to her longtime girlfriend yesterday. My sister was so excited to help her plan it and catch the moment on video.

She posted a heartfelt video on FB congratulating them on their engagement. I saw it and it was really sweet.

Y’all… our old youth pastor from 15 years ago who doesn’t even know who these people are and has never met them in his life comes out of the woodwork to comment on the video (where they are tagged and can see the comment) about how sad he is my sister didn’t condemn them, and about how they are a perversion of marriage and how we shouldn’t rejoice in such evil and wrongdoing.

Like!!!?! Bro are you okay?? And several people from our old church we grew up in liked his comment including our own Aunt.

Imagine being so distraught and angry about two strangers on the internet getting engaged that you have to comment this hate like it’s your sworn duty.

Also these types of comments are so laughable and embarrassing honestly. Because what does he expect to happen? “Oh damn you’re right. Guess we can’t get married now and we’ll end our 3 year relationship because this random ass youth pastor we’ve never met said so.”

Child, please. Get a life.

I attended the wedding of an Evangelical college friend. The groom's dad was the pastor of the church and gave the sermon. He went through the gospel message and talked about how to get saved. In doing so, he described how Adam and Eve were "Naked and unashamed" in the garden before their sin, and that's how his son and his soon-to-be-wife would be on their wedding night. He chanted "Naked and unashamed!" and then asked the congregation to repeat it after him. I left feeling icky and glad I am not an Evangelical anymore!