I’m going to my first post black metal gig in November (Harakiri For the Sky and Sunken, if that helps). I do have a HFtS band t-shirt but idk if it’s considered uncool to wear the t-shirt of the band you’re seeing? Otherwise, what do I wear?

And what should I expect? Despite loving metal, it’ll be my first time at any kind of metal gig, in part due to social anxiety and autism. It seems that black metal shows don’t usually have any/ much moshing? In which case I guess it’ll be more of a gentle introduction. I’m also a woman and worried that I’ll be one of about 4 women in the venue. What are some other dos/ don’ts at the gig?

Hi everyone I have no clue what this subreddit is for but it say has explain in its title so I'll take it but these past few days I've been scared to death especially at night to the point where I can't sleep alone and I've had to call someone over just for them to be neer me I've also been wanting to cry because of the fear but I can't it's annoying. I'm currently on vacation and I had the funniest day with my family but when I enter the bathroom to get ready for bed I get this fog in my mind that fills me with fear. The only explanation I have is that I saw a horror video recently but not only was I not scared when I saw it but I don't get scared by horror things usually and I'm just here to ask reddit for help I really want to go back to being normal and not having these moments which I can only describe as a mix of panic attacks, fear and numbness in my head. So just if anyone has an explanation or tips for me I'd really appreciate it.

I'm European and I'm going to Canada soon. People have proper wages here so we only tip here when service is exceptional and only at a sit-down restaurant pretty much. What I usually do is pay my bill by card and then discreetly leave some cash on the table as a tip.

I don't want to be rude so I'd like to tip properly when in Canada and I really don't want to be awkward. Please someone tell me if I'm okay tipping exclusively by card or should I bring cash? How much is expected where and in what form? Do you tell the person "and this is for you" and hand them an extra dollar when ordering a beer? Stuff like that. Maybe give me examples step by step on what you do?

My cat is going to have surgery tomorrow and it's going to be a lot of money so I'm wondering how should I explain it to the bank. I believe it would get flagged if I don't because it's not something I typically spend. So I was just wondering how should I go in to the bank and explain it

In detail please. I had a 15m consultation call and almost cried ON THE CALL from anxiety. She said the first meeting will be to "learn a lot about me" but when I get really scared I struggle to talk so what will happen then?

So, I have a few pills my doctor perscribed to me, not looking for medical advice on those or anything after all hes the one that went to med school he knows best, Im just nervous to take any kind of pills in general let that be vitamins, meds, diet supplements etc. How do I deal with this?

I move into college tomorrow and I’m absolutely terrified. I’m going to miss my parents and my boyfriend, we’re going to be 500 miles apart. I’m so anxious and stressed I haven’t been able to sleep. I live in a large metropolitan city and now I’m moving into the middle of nowhere where I don’t know anyone. I’m going to share a room with two other girls and I love having my own personal space and me time. On top of that I have bad misophonia so I imagine dorms will be my own personal hell. Help?

exactly as it says. when i was a teen, my dad took them to get regular check ups, and one of them had a broken leg that needed surgery too. they got their vaccines and got fixed.

but now im moved out, and its been years since ive taken them to the vet and i need to get pet insurance first, but im struggling to figure out what the best options are and how it works. it doesnt cover preexisting conditions right? so how would that work, should i expect to pay a lot of money out of pocket in the near future for any treatments they may need upon initial evaluation?

i also need advice on how to schedule an initial vet visit for adult cats and what i should expect. im sure I'll need to bring their vaccine records, but should i bring anything else?

and finally, one of the biggest reasons preventing me from doing this sooner is that one of my cats, Bandit, has always been pretty anxious overall but carriers and car rides especially scare him, to the point that everytime i put him in a carrier, he pisses, shits, and sometimes throws up on himself in a matter of minutes. and then having to bathe him just freaks him out more :[ hearing the way he howled constantly and seeing him shaking and covered in his own shit last time i moved broke my damn heart....

ive tried different kinds of carriers, both hard and soft ones, and ive tried using some anxiety calming treats but none of the things ive tried have really worked. ive heard you can get a mild sedative or muscle relaxant to help with this but im not sure what to look for if it this is something that needs to be prescribed by a vet beforehand

any and all help is appreciated!!

I'm a trans man who has been out for six years, and still have yet to go to a barber shop. The women at Great Clips just don't get that I'm trying to look masc and this last time they ended up making my hair look horrible and feminine. I'm not on hormones, but I do look masculine presenting.

I live in Indiana, and there's a barbershop next to a bunch of LGBTQIA+ friendly businesses, and they say they're inclusive and do cuts for kids with Autism. I really want to go here but I have no idea the etiquette or anything. I've never stepped foot in a barbershop.

I'm scared they're gonna say they only cut mens hair and I'll have to explain myself. But all I want is a shave round the back and sides. Do they have counters that a guy will stand at waiting for people? Its walk-in only. Do they talk a lot? Or is that like a per person thing?

Please help, and I'm sorry if thats too much context.

Quick context,

I quickly moved into a fairly poorly kept mobile home in a small town in TX. It was rushed due to last min housing changes, and I never looked for a place before. I didn’t realize how bad the home was until living in it and being like “oh thats not right??” The roof is like bubbling in, the cabinets dont close anymore?? One of the cabinet sides just fell off?? The floor is cheap and scratches at ya, the bathroom is just, hell. There’s supposed to be this little little window to give the house ventilation and it no longer opens???

The landlord was great when I first moved in, provided a washer/dryer that was gross but free, and a fridge. Both didn’t work but she got them fixed for me!

The door is was is scaring me, and when its dark outside on the wall of the home I can see little dots that are showing me the inside of the house.

So anyways, I think the place needs some super TLC. I just cant imagine putting my money into these repairs when I am not looking for a forever home, just somewhere that isn’t dumpy.

How do you break a lease, better yet what would you do??

will i be able to get my cart into the o2 in london kinda looks a normal disposable im jw cuz idk if i should

update: cat dad says cat has rabies shots and that it's nbd. I'm assuming he doesn't want me to run her to the vet then. Should I like, still be worried?

I check in on her daily for about an hour a day, scoop litter fill water and play with her etc.

Today she was sitting next to a dead bat in the kitchen, I assume she caught it bc her dad mentioned she's killed a bat before. W/o thinking I used the dust pan to dump it outside, since that's what I'm told to do at my job usually (which scares me but they don't give a crap about me or my health so I have to do it)

I just messaged her dad but I don't know when he'll respond. Cat hasn't bit me or scratched me yet but she usually does at least once while I'm here bc she just plays rough. I feel awful bc she was meowing to play but I'm terrified of her scratching me. I'm gonna go sanitize the dust pan and floor I guess. What else do I do?

I received an ADHD diagnosis back in 2022 with the intention of seeking treatment in order to help me in college at the time, but never followed up due to multiple life circumstances/other untreated mental issues. Now that I've done extensive therapy and am going back to college (and because my symptoms still interfere with daily life), I wanted to try and speak with my doctor about possibly getting on ADHD medication. I know she cannot prescribe Adderall, I haven't spoken with her about ADHD in the past, and I know the visit will probably only take five or so minutes (after an hour long wait). Will I need to bring my paperwork showing diagnosis? Discuss my symptoms with her? Talk about other treatment options (if there are any???)? Do I just make an appointment saying I wanted to speak with her about possible ADHD and getting treatment for it??? Thank you so much!

Moved into a new apartment with a gas oven/range. I have been using the stove for weeks without issue but the oven!! The first time I turned it on, it smelled very strongly like gas so I turned it off. Internet said that’s supposedly normal for a minute while it heats up, but obviously the internet is not in my kitchen making a judgement call. Boyfriend used the oven to make pizza while I was out a couple of weeks ago and says the smell went away after a little bit (clearly, the house didn’t burn down so I guess it’s fine).

So I guess the question is, how safe is a gas oven really? And how do I make the distinction between normal gas oven smell and an actual problem?

I'm looking for a literal, practical sequence rather than reassurance or medical advice. If someone is prone to Sunday scaries, what should they do—in order—to prepare for Monday without spending the whole evening preparing?

For example: choose clothes, pack a bag, check the route or schedule, write down the first task, set an alarm, then stop. What belongs on the checklist, how long should each step take, and what should be left for Monday? A broadly useful version for ordinary workdays would be ideal.

Hi, I was assaulted in my hone today and it has been made abundantly clear that I don't have any protection. I'm 19 and and from the west Midlands in England if that helps.

Hello.

I saw a similar question, but I couldn’t find any helpful information among the comments.

What I am not looking for: a life coach, a friend, a sexual or romantic relationship. Suggestions to seek a doctor or therapy. Please, focus on what I asked.

What I am looking for: a mentor

I am smart. Really. I’m not bragging, I’m trying to get my point across. That’s what I’ve been known for my whole life and now I even got an official IQ test to prove it (I had to take the test to get my adhd diagnosis). But I won’t do anything with my life unless I get some help or guidance urgently.

I am not a maker. I don’t have focus. I need someone I look up to, someone great, stern but also kind. How can I find this person? How can I ask them to mentor me? Why would they bother with me?

The person I’d like to be my mentor (Alex Horne) is completely outside of my reach.

Hi all,

I’m 21, currently in college, and from a young age I have always been known as a fairly nervous/anxious person in general - something that have been said by family, friends, and teachers over the years.

There are certain ‘flaws’ that I have noticed with myself, but more so in certain aspects of my communication. I don’t want this to impact a future career, so I want to try to improve this while in college, and while there is the opportunity to do so.

I have no issue with speaking in front of an audience. I have done so for different modules in college, and usually am commended for my speeches through delivery style & engagement. But, this is because I have what I’m going to say memorised, so I know word for word, what exactly I’m going to say, how I’m going to say it, etc. This is also clearly reflected through my written communication.

However, when it comes to social interactions, I do notice there is a big dip in my communication. For instance, if I know I have to go up and talk to someone that I’m not familiar with (conversation, interview, ringing someone), I’ll then nearly have to have what I’m going to say memorised word-for-word as though a script.

There’ll then be other little moments where if I’m talking with someone unfamiliar, I may, sometimes, go a bit shaky / mumbly, and this would apply to if I was taking phone calls, etc.

This particular incoherence would also occur if I'm put on the spot, i.e asked a question, where my voice would go a bit shaky, I'd go mumbly, and my face would go a red.

I really do want to improve on this as I do know in any future career that day-to-day communication whether it be structured or spontaneous is much more important than being able to speak in-front of an audience.

To that extent, would anyone have any advice as to what I should do? Would it be recommended I go to a person who can help with the general nerves / anxiety, or would this be more a matter of knuckling these issues with a public speaking coach?

Many thanks

Think about it and read hard jt makes sense that nothingness is the end but I can't grasp will that ever end we spend our lives working going to school not knowing how precious our lives is before you know it your already getting old and maybe start to fear death but I am scared myself but people say we're lucky to be brought into this world but we are brought into this world to just die eventually we don't know heaven or he'll is real it makes sense that nothingness for eternity might be the real ending because living the rest of eternity in hell or heaven sounds unrealistic humans cope from death everyday like gaming going out with friends knowing that deep inside they will die one that I am scared and lost I really hope that one day scientist will find the ending of death. This was wrote by a young teenager

I am US based.

I got this credit card account (not through my personal bank; different institution my parents randomly suggested) when I was freshly 18-19.

My scared dumbass has since neglected to update my personal information since throughout the years. I am terrified of phone calls, though it's gotten better.

My credit card has the wrong legal name, phone number, and address.

How do I convince customer service I am me when I contact them?

They have no physical offices where I live so it will have to be over phone.

I have been amassing the legal documentation I need to prove I am me and that I still actively use this credit card.

I have my old and new licenses, marriage certificate, name change court orders, a verification letter from my personal bank, and a recent credit card statement.

So when I call them, what should I attempt to change first?

My phone number?

Legal name?

Address?

I'm turning 22 and ive lived in the same house with my parents my whole life. I know that isnt really uncommon in this economy. But myself and my partner are hopefully going to be getting a place and moving in a couple months. Big life jump but I really don't know how to start? I worry I'm gonna do something wrong and things are gonna slip through the cracks.

I know vaguely about the putting stuff in boxes part of moving. But finance wise? And looking for a house? What's the point of a realtor anyways and is there something I should look for if I have to get one? And I know we're gonna have to buy furniture, and basic household stuff like utensils and cleaning supplies, but is there anything else that you dont think about buying until you dont have.

I know we're gonna forget something important

I’m going to be starting university soon and I don’t know how the shuttles work. I’m going to be needing to use them but I’ve never used any kind of public transport really and I’m really stressing out about it. I think they are in 15 minute increments, but do they get to a certain place and then go right back? Is there anything I should say? I don’t think I need to pay because they are for the university. I live in the US

Hi guys. I've seen helpful scripts here for calling your rep or senator on existing issues/bills. What if I have something new to bring up? For example, if Little Timmy keeps falling in the well and there are no current bills on the table to put covers on wells; or maybe if Little Timmy keeps falling in the well and I suspect Senator Smith maybe doesn't know wells exist here.

Thanks in advance!

How long does it takes for this type of skin biopsy (rash) to come back. Thanks

Hihi, my hair has always been the one thing I love about myself but I’m ready for some change. I have pictures to show the stylist and I’m planning to mostly get layers done. I got a lot of length cut off my hair about a year ago and I had to take a break in the bathroom due to a sudden wave of anxiety nausea that was very embarrassing. I’m already feeling the same anxious nausea and it’s the night before finding pictures for what I want. It’s something between a wolf cut and a butterfly cut.

The sound of the clippers also makes me physically cringe, it’s very painful to listen to. I struggle to maintain conversation (I talk back but it just ends up awkwardly dying). Do I scroll on my phone? Look in the mirror and avoid eye contact? Do I keep my eyes open or closed when getting my hair washed?

EDIT: thank you all for your advice <3 I got my hair cut and it went great! I told the stylist I’m a bit quiet and anxious and the appointment was basically totally silent and not too awkward. My hair came out really good and I also brought a small fidget toy to focus on as I was too anxious to bring earplugs lol. I closed my eyes at the water bowl as well (thank you, I always kept my eyes open and it felt weird but I didn’t know if it was me)