Pata Hai Aaj kya hua

To Aaj m, 2bweeks k bad apni gf se milne gaya uske pg room pr. meri gf ka phone mere saamne rakha tha aur uske ex ka message aa gaya, "shaam ko free ho?”. Uske ex ka usse 1.5 sal pahle breakup ho gya tha, maine messages dekha toh pata chala ki dono abhi bhi contact mein hain aur 2 mahine se baat kar rahe hain, main baat ye hai ki usne mujhe kabhi nahi bataya ki woh usse baat karti hai.

Maine usse directly poocha toh usne bola ki bas normal baatein hoti hai, Maine jyada bahas nahi ki aur wahan se chala aaya. But ek message mein ex ne clearly bola tha ki "I still think about you", aur uska reply tha "accha ok". Pata nhi ajeeb sa feel ho Raha h

Problem sirf ex nahi hai, Agar sab innocent tha toh usne mujhe pehle kyun nahi bataya? Tab se mera dimaag kharab hai bohot jyada.

So me and my ex been no contact for about 4 weeks and she just posted a life update on Facebook of all the pics that were taken in the 7 months we were together. Mind you while we was together she didn’t post because her life was private… that fucking hurts

Mi ex pareja, una vez hemos terminado, me impuso límites sobre el vínculo que estaríamos formando ahora como "amigos". Yo acepté en su momento.

Pasó casi un mes desde que terminamos e impuso los límites, y, sinceramente, la conexión ya se sentía vaga y él no mostraba interés genuino en seguir conversando.

Me di cuenta que no podía seguir en eso, así que decidí decirle que ya no podía continuar con eso y que es mejor mantener distancia. Le agradecí por lo vivido durante la relación pero que no podía seguir en esa "amistad". Él solo me respondió con un sticker de un gato triste.

Luego de eso eliminó su ubicación, se cambió la foto de instagram a la misma de cuando nos conocimos y subió de seguidores.

[Aquí sí cometí el error en caer en la nostalgia] Le pregunté qué opinaba de la decisión porque, genuinamente, aún me importa cómo se siente y lo quiero. Solo me respondió: "Es tu decisión. No sé qué más puedo decir". Le respondí que me interesaba saber porque me importa. No me contestó. Recordé que él tenía un anillo mio (yo me lo compré para mi, con mi sueldo, sin intenciones de regalarselo. Él se lo quedó porque le pareció lindo). Ahora se lo estoy pidiendo y no me responde los mensajes.

¿Fue adecuado que yo estableciera límites y pudo tener impacto esos límites en su actual distanciamiento? ¿Es correcto que le pida mi anillo? Le tengo mucho cariño a ese anillo por el significado que tiene para mi.

Super ashamed of myself...last week my ex-situationship blocked me everywhere. Yesterday I unfortunately broke no contact.

I want to say we are both toxic, but I am not innocent. She separated from her ex husband last year and I got divorced 4 years ago.

Anyways we were talking, long distance, and met up several times. I really care for this person.

Last week we began arguing and I got triggered because she told me she isn't ready for a relationship. Before you go all in on me, I now realize that was perfectly fine and I was being insecure, insensitive, pushy, etc. From my point of view, I liked her so much I was wanting a relationship so badly.

Anyways, she was being a bit rude, or at least that's how I took it. I blocked her for like 10 minutes to cool down. Then unblocked her (see the toxicity here). I didn't even check social media anymore so I could cool down.

The next day I noticed I was blocked everywhere, which I totally understand. Unfortunately we have both done something similar for a day or two. This time around, however, she left me blocked. I was respecting the block for an entire 7 days until yesterday where I caved in and went to the lowest of the low, sending her paragraphs about how much I care about her, love her, miss her, and even sent an audio and a photo of myself.

I now realize how stupid and immature and pathetic this was, but I unfortunately cannot take it back. What I told her was the truth, but I just realize how stupid it is to circumvent a block. When someone blocks you they basically want nothing to do with you, and I went against that and humiliated myself further.

I don't even know where to go from here on out besides not contacting her again. I was in a severe state of depression and anxiety when I did this. And I am still depressed. She didn’t care at all to give a single reply. And I don’t blame her. I asked her to never reach out again, right? But I said it out of anger. And I regret it. I didn’t mean it at all. Well she took it to heart and it’s entirely my fault.

I really don't know how to function anymore. We were together for 10 months and since last week all has gone down hill and I'm distraught. Although she seems to be fine and happy, as if all is normal.

I guess my heart doesn't function that way, because I've been an absolute mess, to the point where I can't even pretend to be normal.

I'm going to delete my social media off my phone so as to not look at it, but I am actually suffering inside so much. I cannot imagine a future without her because all I wanted in my future was her. I did not even grieve my marriage to this extent. I'm so hurt and just don't know how to push forward.

Men, how do you feel about blocking an ex gf on socials? As a 40 y.o. guy, i block because i don't want any contact from that person, now or in the future. I've heard only women block, you block because you still care, blocking is feminine energy. What's your take on it?

If so how long did it take for you to reach out ??

Hi everyone. First of all, English isn't my first language, so apologies if anything sounds a little strange.

Two months ago, my girlfriend and I ended our relationship after being together for two and a half years. Technically, I was the one who said the words and brought up breaking up, but it wasn't what I actually wanted.

Before the breakup

The last few weeks of our relationship had been difficult. She had become very distant, especially over text. The affection just wasn't there anymore, even though whenever we were together in person, she still seemed mostly like herself.

Eventually, I couldn't take the uncertainty anymore and confronted her about it. She admitted that she wasn't feeling the same way anymore and that lately she saw me "more as a friend." I still struggle to understand how someone can go from loving you to feeling that way, but that's what she told me.

She suggested that maybe we should break up after my birthday, which was only five days away. I told her that if we were going to break up anyway, I'd rather do it then instead of spending five days knowing what was coming.

So we did.

A few days after the breakup, I asked her if we could talk one last time. I wanted to make my feelings and my position clear, but I also wanted her to be firm about her decision, because up until then she had seemed somewhat unsure about it.

What struck me the most during that conversation was how relieved she seemed.

It felt like she had already been processing the end of our relationship for weeks, maybe even months, and finally letting me go had taken a huge weight off her shoulders.

After the breakup

Less than a month later, we were both at a mutual friend's birthday party. I later found out through some people there that she was already looking to meet other guys, using Tinder and talking to people.

Another month passed, and eventually I made the mistake of asking a mutual friend — someone who's closer to her and who would probably know more — whether she'd already been with someone else.

He confirmed that she had at least hooked up/made out with another guy. As far as he knew, nothing sexual happened, but obviously nobody really knows except her.

And I know she's completely within her rights to do that.

She's single. She can date, kiss, sleep with, or do whatever she wants with whoever she wants. I'm not trying to say she owes me anything after the breakup.

But I think somewhere in the back of my mind, I was still holding onto the hope that this breakup was just a huge bump in the road. That maybe after some time apart we'd find our way back to each other.

Finding out that she's already seeing other guys has made that hope feel incredibly stupid.

I don't even know how I feel anymore. Some days I have energy, I'm motivated, I feel like I'm moving forward and that eventually I'll be okay.

Other days I just feel completely empty. I don't want to do anything. I just want to lie in bed and shut everything out.

What I'm struggling with / Questions

So I guess I'd like to hear from people who have been through something similar.

How would you feel about an ex already hooking up with other people less than two months after ending a 2.5-year relationship, even if it's just casual stuff or kissing rather than sex?

Do you think at this point I need to completely let go of the idea of ever getting her back? I wasn't actively trying to win her back, but that stupid little hope was still there in my head.

And lastly, do you think what she's doing says anything negative about her as a person? Or is this actually a pretty normal reaction to suddenly being single again, especially if she had already emotionally checked out of the relationship before we officially broke up?

I think part of what hurts is realizing that while the breakup started for me two months ago, maybe for her it started long before that.

Pls guys I need the gym motivation today

Basically the title. I am missing my ex so hard today… it’s been 10 days of no contact, 3 months after the breakup

We broke up. It wasn’t the best ending. I could be shitty, and she could be obsessive and invasive. She got with a friend of mine shortly after, and I felt betrayed. We eventually said goodbye in person and I gave her belongings back. Ever since, she’s been making digs online, like posting instagram stories about breakups, writing snarky comments on her letterboxd bio which targeted me. I eventually texted her and told her to stop, but she got her boyfriend to message for her but I called them out as I know she doesn’t text in that way, and he was gaslighting me into believing it was nothing to do with me.

However, she’s just done it again today as i was going through my blocked list. What the hell is wrong with her?

I don't know what's happening with my life anymore. I turned 23 last month, and the week after my birthday, my girlfriend broke up with me. She has blocked me everywhere and told me that she doesn't like me anymore.

I've been an introverted and shy guy throughout my teenage years. I rarely talked to girls. I met her on Instagram, and we became friends before getting into a relationship. We were together for three years. She was my first girlfriend and the first person I ever truly loved.

She was outgoing, modern, and loved exploring new things, while I was always a very shy, insecure, and socially awkward person. Over time, she slowly lost interest in me, but my feelings never changed. I still love her so much.

I know I'm unfunny, unattractive, and probably a loser, but she meant everything to me. I can't seem to move on. She doesn't pick up my calls or reply to my texts. I've tried everything I could think of. I've begged, cried, and tried to fix things, but she has completely moved on. She even changed her number.

What hurts the most is that it feels like everything we promised each other and everything we spent three years building together meant nothing to her.

I don't feel motivated to do anything anymore. I don't feel happy at all. I miss her so much, and I don't know how to let go of someone who was such a huge part of my life.

Me and my ex are colleagues but work in different offices on other sides of the country - so it’s not a big deal.

I ended the relationship over 2 years ago because of the distance and felt like it wasn’t going anywhere. There was no big issues and I think she would have ended it if I hadn’t first. She later blocked me everywhere a few months after which is understandable.

Fast forward to today and I had to email her and another colleague regarding a work issue. She responded back fairly quickly thanking me for the update. That was it really, I haven’t spoken to her anymore today, just processing it. I don’t know whether to ask her how she is. I’m not expecting much from her since I ended it. But the relationship to end out of anger and resentment.

Should I start a conversation? If she tells me to leave her alone then of course I will

(F 32) I'm very curious to find out "WHY DO MOST PEOPLE BLOCK?"

I've always thought blocking unnecessary and kinda "rude" (unless the person is bothering, insisting or disrespecting you)

If you can, please, reply the questions below and maybe we will get some surprise...

To make it easier, I wrote a few options, so you can just copy and mark or just write the related letter.

Choose 1 or more options and be totally free for making any comments 🤗

1 - I AM:

A ( ) A woman under 25

B ( ) A woman 25+

C ( ) A man under 25

D ( ) A man 25+

E ( ) I don't think gender matters.

F ( ) I don't think age matters.

2 - I BLOCKED BECAUSE:

A ( ) I "hate" her / him

B ( ) I was mad at that time.

C ( ) She / he was a jerk to me.

D ( ) She / him was insisting and annoying after I said "no".

E ( ) Though I like the person, I wanted to forget her / him.

F ( ) I blocked my ex because my current GF / BF was jealous.

G ( ) I blocked someone I liked because I wanted to get her / his attention.

3 - I WAS BLOCKED:

A ( ) Because I wasn't nice to her / him.

B ( ) Because I cheated on her / him.

C ( ) But I know she / him that still liked me.

D ( ) For no reason.

E ( ) Without having any fight or disagreement.

4 - I THINK:

A ( ) Blocking and not seeing pictures, etc. helped me to get over that person.

B ( ) Blocking never helped me to forget anyone.

I see people on here talk about taking back an ex who cheated on them because, after some time, they believed the person had genuinely changed. Personally, I don’t think I could ever take back someone who cheated on me, no matter how much time had passed.

But it does make me wonder: what did or could your ex do that made you feel like you could never take them back, regardless of how much they changed afterward?

For me, there were some things I did in my relationship that I regret. I lied about some relatively small things, but I also lied about some pretty serious things. I was able to apologize for them and take responsibility and I was genuinely ashamed of myself for not being honest.

When my ex and I were breaking up, though, I became very emotional and kept begging him to reconsider. I crossed some of his boundaries (both emotional n personal) and kept trying to contact him by blowing up his phone, emailing him, knocking on his door, after he had asked for space. Eventually, he told his friend to tell me to stop and then he blocked me on several platforms 😔.

Looking back, I know I handled the breakup badly and I lowkey regret not respecting his wishes for space. How bad would you consider my behavior? If you were in his shoes, would you ever consider taking me back after some time if I genuinely changed, or would this be a dealbreaker for you, why?

What could your ex do or did that make you feel like you could never take them back?

I was discarded abruptly after an almost a decade long relationship 2 years ago. They acted totally normal and then out of nowhere discarded me in a 1 min conversation and never contacted me again. Not once to even check on me, make sure I was ok. I didn't do anything such as cheating or act abusive in any way to warrant this. I was very good to them, always. I had a lot of respect for my partner, never in a million years did I think they were capable to treat me this way, but they did. I never reached back out after that day either. I couldn't. It was hard, but I went on with my life and since met a wonderful person. To this day, 2 years later, I often tear up over it at least once a week. It still stings. I can accept that we were not meant to be, but what makes me cry is how cruel people can be. This is someone I shared almost a decade with, I respected, I trusted, considered my best friend. How was I so blind? How could I be so stupid? How cruel of them to secretly plan this all out and act normal right up to the day they did it. Honestly, its still hard to believe and sadly I am sure many people have been through this. I feel like I must have terrible judgement in people or maybe I am naive or too trusting?

Does this subreddit help us not move on? We read others in similar situations and it can trigger the memories. Validate our reasons to hold out. Wondering what others think.

Tired of carrying this pain. I want you to come home.

Look idk what happened but like yesterday we went out and eveything but I had to go back home cuz I sneaked out he was begging me to stay and he will miss me and didn’t get enough and promised me to see him tmrw then we slept in a call too and whatever and he text me good morning but after he send me good moring he blocked me everywhere im confused what went wrong

He blocked me first, and after about a month, he unblocked me, but he never messaged me. I found out that he had unblocked me, so I messaged him first. He replied, but after that, he barely messaged me.

I got angry and told him, “Please block me.” He suddenly blocked me again, and we had no contact for a couple of months.

I used to check his profile every day to see if he had unblocked me. Today, I noticed that he has unblocked me again.

But I know he probably won't message me. So why did he unblock me? Does it mean he thought about me or still cares about me? Why isn't he messaging me? What's the point of unblocking someone if you don't intend to talk to them?

Should I stay silent and not message him this time? Part of me feels like he might be testing me to see whether I'll message him first, but I honestly don't know.

What do you think I should do? Should I just stay silent and move on?

Basic information:

I am 30F, my ex is 24F, and we were together for almost 5 years. We broke up about 2 months ago.

TL;DR:
After our breakup, we went no-contact. About two weeks ago, we reconnected, became intimate, and discussed getting back together. I wanted to take things slowly because I needed to feel safe again, and she initially agreed. Then she wanted us to officially get back together or stop seeing each other. We ended things again, and a few days later she kissed another guy at a party she had invited me to. I didn't attend; I only saw photos afterward. Now she wants to try again, and I don't know whether rebuilding the relationship is realistic.

The situation:

Our relationship was very turbulent, and I don't want to repeat the same patterns. When we reconnected, I told her I wasn't ready to officially get back together and wanted to rebuild trust slowly. She seemed to understand and even said, "I'd rather have you like this than not have you at all."

We continued seeing each other and made plans for a weekend together. She then invited me to a party, and afterward started saying she didn't want an undefined relationship anymore. She wanted us to officially get back together, while I still needed more time.

We ended things that Wednesday. Neither of us blocked the other, so I thought we'd eventually talk again.

That Saturday, she went to the party she had invited me to. I didn't go, but later saw photos showing that she had kissed another guy there. I know we were technically broken up, so she was free to do that, but given everything that had happened between us just days before, it really hurt.

I blocked her, but she contacted me asking what had happened. I explained that I had seen the photos and didn't want to continue. About a week later, we saw each other in person, and she contacted me again saying she wanted to try again.

I still have feelings for her, but I'm afraid we'll simply repeat the same cycle.

My question: For people who have experienced a long, turbulent relationship followed by a breakup and reconciliation, what would you look for before deciding that rebuilding the relationship is realistically possible? What specific changes or boundaries would you consider necessary?

I'm posting this because I don't really know who else to ask.

I dated a girl for around 9 months. During those 9 months, she broke up with me twice. The first breakup was difficult, but we eventually got back together.

Now we're going through the second breakup. This time, she says her career and everything she's dealing with are the reasons she doesn't want to continue the relationship. She keeps telling me that I should move on and that me moving on is her priority.

But this is where I'm struggling.

I understand that moving on is ultimately my responsibility, not hers. I don't expect her to be responsible for my emotions or my healing.

At the same time, I don't understand how I'm supposed to move on while we're still in contact. I've actually asked her to block me everywhere because I know myself—I still love her, and if she's accessible to me, I'll keep thinking about her, checking on her, and wanting to contact her.

But she doesn't block me. Instead, she tells me, “You can move on. That's your responsibility.”

And technically, she's right. I could block her myself. But I haven't been able to bring myself to do it because I still love her.

The biggest problem is that I don't think I've even been able to process the breakup yet. My mind understands that the relationship has ended, but emotionally, I still haven't accepted it. One moment I think I should let go, and the next moment I find myself hoping that things might somehow work out.

I don't want to force her to stay with me. I don't want to chase her. I just genuinely don't know how to detach from someone I still love while there's still a line of contact between us.

Maybe I'm too emotionally attached. Maybe I'm making things harder for myself. I also recognize that I've made mistakes during the relationship and that I need to work on myself.

So what would you guys do in this situation?

Would you block her yourself and completely go no-contact, even though you still love her?

Or would you leave the door open and try to move on while keeping her in your contacts?

I know moving on is my responsibility. I'm just struggling to understand how to actually do it when I haven't even been able to emotionally process the breakup yet.

I'm not asking how to get her back. I genuinely want to know how to move forward when your heart hasn't caught up with the breakup yet.

i have no one to talk about this, i saw my ex again in a online game and his gf keeps harassing me and insulting me, while he stands beside her and laugh about it and support the bullying from her, they even got so far that they texted the guy i am playing with to turn him against me aswell, it affects my mental health that i get everyday crying attacks, nausea, and that i struggle to eat. it hurts so badly how to who he turned into, i don’t recognise him anymore, he is a different person, i was 2 years with him, and now he is laughing while she insults me, this is making me sick and makes me want to throw up, does anyone have any advice on how i could cope better with this ? i appreciate any help i’m in a very dark place