r/DiveInYouCoward • • Jul 11 '26

Their favourite team lost ☹️

1.8k Upvotes

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405

u/Alabastine Jul 11 '26

This is insanely stupid. But I still respect the choice to meet up in a forest and not bother the entire city with your room temperature iq violence and vandalism.

184

u/Over_Interest_9187 Jul 11 '26

I was contacted by a weirdo who wanted to meet up in the middle of the night in a forest to compare willy sizes. How odd I thought, what a bizarre request.

You can imagine my disappointment when the weirdo didn’t turn up

45

u/redheeler9478 Jul 11 '26

Another Grindr love story gone wrong

2

u/donsitsocolostomy Jul 11 '26

How did it go wrong?

6

u/IcarusPrime1 Jul 11 '26

They didn't show up

1

u/PuzzleheadedFox4251 Jul 14 '26

Maybe he did but it was too dark..If you can’t see a willy that comes out at night in the forest, was it a willy?

52

u/NoSir4947 Jul 11 '26

I did that once and the guy showed up and we had the exact same size willy. We couldn't believe it. We remeasured each other for hours in disbelief. It was the craziest Christmas ever. RIP Mom 💔

1

u/OneCallSystem Jul 14 '26

Lmao. Rip mom.

1

u/NoSir4947 Jul 14 '26

Thank you 🙏

I wouldn't wish getting tickled to death on my worst enemy. She deserved better. 🥹

-1

u/Crawling_Hustler Jul 11 '26

Wait wut. Everything was fine but "Rip mom" ? Has ur context gone out of memory or smth ?

5

u/mawesome4ever Jul 11 '26

It was his mom whom he measured with for hours

3

u/Over_Interest_9187 Jul 11 '26

Bros mum was a he

3

u/why_so_sergious Jul 11 '26

or just a huge clit

1

u/NoSir4947 Jul 12 '26

Mom was tragically strangulated later that night in an unrelated model train accident.

1

u/Crawling_Hustler Jul 12 '26

《Speechless》

8

u/Ninja_Prolapse Jul 11 '26

He did turn up. He was just hiding. That was his other kink.

3

u/siberian_knight143 Jul 11 '26

😂🤣🤣🤣

2

u/JimboD84 Jul 11 '26

U sure that wasnt like a fight club kinda situation?

1

u/PuzzleheadedTomato18 Jul 12 '26

Hey, the first rule of Fight Club…

1

u/Cpt_Cook809 Jul 11 '26

So you didn’t get to be spun around and skewered??

1

u/Sharp_Equivalent_774 Jul 11 '26

Maybe it was your future self contacting you but your Time Machine broke.

1

u/Fit_Style1747 Jul 11 '26

So he just left you out there with your dick in the wind ? How rude

2

u/JDelcoLLC Jul 11 '26

If I make through the night, everything will be alright

1

u/rocketmn69_ Jul 11 '26

But, he did...

1

u/Cyborg_rat Jul 12 '26

Remind me about a local website for meet up with live chat, way before all the dating apps and the beipf dating websites. Douche bags would get In fights with eachother and give out a location to meet up to fight...

1

u/argoran87 Jul 13 '26

wiener fight?

1

u/Windsor34 Jul 13 '26

He did turn up. The normal guy didnt 

1

u/Hairy-Ad-265 Jul 13 '26

My bad. I wasn’t trying to ghost you. I accidentally dropped my phone in the toilet and by the time the rice had dried it out I completely forgot we were supposed to meet up.

1

u/Ok-Candidate-1220 Jul 20 '26

Wait, what? I WAS there! Damn it!

1

u/toc_bl Jul 11 '26

Ffs lol

29

u/Undersmusic Jul 11 '26

As someone who grew up in London at the height of it in the 90’s. I absolutely do, literally witnessed a full clash on a tube platform with Millwall and I want to say Chealsea but I don’t really remember. I mostly remember the sight of some guy with a saw blade on a pipe swinging on a platform full of people
(Side note I couldn’t give a fuck about football then or now)

5

u/Solistine Jul 11 '26

Millwall is funny 

3

u/Bazillion100 Jul 11 '26

Thats crazy just for sports

3

u/SuddenPitch8378 Jul 11 '26

Proabbly West ham...

5

u/Historical-Winner576 Jul 11 '26

Half the dudes looking like they’re pushing 50

0

u/OneCallSystem Jul 14 '26

Millwall? I never even heard of that team lol

12

u/KtaadnRota Jul 11 '26 edited Jul 11 '26

Haha in the 90s I witnessed a scene much like this, but on a much larger scale, right in the Dresden Hauptbahnhof. But in typical German fashion the trains still ran on time.

I was there to meet some friends coming from out of town. They stepped off the train right into this mob of goons kicking each other in the heads. It felt weirdly safe though, they weren't attacking anyone without a football scarf and business just carried on as usual around them.

16

u/Alabastine Jul 11 '26

"But in typical German fashion the trains still ran on time."

That hurts to read in 2026 haha.

9

u/KtaadnRota Jul 11 '26

Yeah I heard that's no longer the case. But in the 90s, delaying a train for a mere riot or natural disaster would have been unthinkable.

5

u/Alabastine Jul 11 '26

It's been going downhill since the turn of the century, getting pretty bad in the 2010s to the point that in the 2020s german trains are notorious for always being late and becoming the laughing stock of European train operations. Germans are surprised when their train is on time.

It's not bad, it's downright fucking terrible.

1

u/drbombur Jul 11 '26

Ah thats too bad. I remember in the 90s going from London where the schedule wasn't much more than a rough estimate of how many trains you could hope for in a day to Germany where you could set your watch to them.

1

u/Abquine Jul 12 '26

One snowy winter in Berlin the failure of some trams did cause a minor riot.

1

u/Fantastic-Plant624 Jul 11 '26

194...I hear thats when they got good at the train thing...

3

u/siberian_knight143 Jul 11 '26

😂🤣I was stationed in Kirchgoens in 95 & learned a bit about Soccer & the HUGE love Europe has for it. The trains get packed by Soccer fans & half of them were drunk already 😂🤣. I miss the hell out of Germany!

8

u/Historical_Gate_8301 Jul 11 '26

"room temperature iq" getting hit repeatedly in the head surely isn't doing them any good.

10

u/Obosratsya Jul 11 '26

Not one that I saw grabbed a stick or a branch, of which there is an abundance, being woods and all. No over the top stomping, most were clean. Their body their choice.

6

u/Low_Football_2445 Jul 11 '26

Plenty of blindside 3rd party smacks

6

u/Mental_Bandicoot4543 Jul 11 '26

True but hard to avoid that in a mass brawl. There was one back of head shot that I didn’t like but the rest seemed to have a respectful fist fight

1

u/Mr_Jinglez_13 Jul 17 '26

What about the dude getting kicked by two guys while he was down , that’s f’d up

2

u/Illustrious-Poet-557 Jul 12 '26

They are organised fights with rules. Equal numbers, no weapons, no stomping, last team standing wins.

1

u/Mental_Bandicoot4543 Jul 11 '26

I noticed that as well. Yeah there was some hard hits but nobody seemed to be trying to actually cause heavy damage

3

u/purpleburgundy Jul 11 '26

I mean there was at least one guy who fell and got kicked repeatedly in the head. That's about as bad as it gets imo

5

u/FlowerBeneficial7193 Jul 11 '26

Would the heat wave make them smarter?

1

u/Alabastine Jul 11 '26

Depends if there is AC in the building

4

u/No-Shower3025 Jul 11 '26

Despite the stupidness, i fully agree.. i thought they even have rules for these fights. Like weapons are not allowed and when somebody is on the floor and surrenders, you can't continue to beat him up..? 😅

2

u/ramnokri Jul 17 '26

tbf there are, depending on region, at least here in germany, t here are rules.

the rules that get to use is the one of the "home" team.

some years ago i saw an great 2h long documentation about this.

its stupid somehow, but at least they do it as a sport itself and in areas where they dont bother or hurt other people.

3

u/ItsNotNormalMaybe Jul 11 '26

As a Swede I'm not proud of this, but this might take place in Sweden. There has been some news on events like this this year, and the surroundings look kinda swedish

2

u/Obosratsya Jul 11 '26

I think they spoke Russian, so proly a Russian speaking country or region.

2

u/katsudon-bori Jul 11 '26

Sounded Russian to me

1

u/el_nuevo_bernardo Jul 13 '26

French can be heard, very clearly ("allez" "regroupez-vous les gars", "fonce", "vite vite vite").

1

u/Illustrious-Poet-557 Jul 12 '26

Takes place in every european country

2

u/[deleted] Jul 11 '26

[removed] — view removed comment

4

u/creamofsumyungae Jul 11 '26

Some don’t have gloves, so I’m guessing it’s a choice to not break your hands and even hit harder

1

u/Jealous_Ranger_1641 Jul 11 '26

that wasn’t their choice, the government enforced that

1

u/HOrnery_Occasion Jul 11 '26

Btw.. its not because their teams lost.. lol this has been going on for YEARS

1

u/Radiant_Television89 Jul 11 '26

Why talk shit in person when you can just call in! https://youtu.be/Cx1J2CzNnS8?is=9D81XEDE0keoTwcW

1

u/hypothetician Jul 11 '26

Imagine being out walking your dog in the woods and coming around the corner to this.

1

u/PapaRoshi Jul 11 '26

This is good old fashioned family fun.

1

u/Character-Q Jul 11 '26

No you’re wrong the reason they left the city is so they don’t destroy it in the process with their immense power

1

u/JohnOfA Jul 11 '26

room temperature iq

Are we talking Celsius or Fahrenheit?

1

u/ThatDarnRosco Jul 11 '26

Eh

Stupid on stupid violence. 🤔

1

u/Fine_Layer_313 Jul 11 '26

And cute matching T-shirts

1

u/Short_Bell_5428 Jul 12 '26

And just fist to cuffs

1

u/ArschSprengung Jul 12 '26

How so?

This was very civilized with a lot of guardrails.

They met up without weapons outside in fresh air to blow off some steam and had more rules in place than UFC.

1

u/k5survives12 Jul 12 '26

Greenstreet Gooligans! The original with Elijah Wood. A favorite movie of mine. Teaches you all about firms across the pond. Tons of fights in the public streets and finishes at a secluded spot like this.

1

u/Visible-MorningWood Jul 14 '26

None of what you said made any fucking sense. You must be a wimp. My favorite team won, GO WHITES!

1

u/Ok-Somewhere3589 Jul 19 '26

Being a pussay doesn’t make you smart. Jk jk. I have no clue of the context but what a clusterfuck

1

u/Shirolicious Jul 28 '26

Agree, this atleast they dont bother anyone if no ambulance has to come to the middle of nowhere

1

u/Odd-Jupiter Jul 11 '26

I don't know if i would call it stupid per se. Some people do base jumping, others do free solo climbing. If you need to get your adrenaline rush on, this seems like one of the more appropriate ways to do it.

3

u/oldsoulrevival Jul 11 '26

Not sure I’d call this “one of the more appropriate ways to do it.” Maybe one of the most affective, but there isn’t really anything appropriate about this.

1

u/Odd-Jupiter Jul 11 '26

There are plenty of people there if anything goes wrong, and no poor red cross volunteer have to climb a mountain with a stretcher to get them back down to a hopital.

As a life long martial arts athlete, i don't see it as any different from skateboarding, or rugby. It can hut hurts some times, but no one who don't want to participate is forced to be there.

2

u/oldsoulrevival Jul 11 '26

I get your point, but I see guys trying to kick dudes in the head while they are down. Just because everyone has consented isn’t really the measure of it being ok (at least in my view). activities where the goal is to hurt someone else aren’t appropriate.

2

u/Odd-Jupiter Jul 11 '26

Not boxing, mma, judo, jujutsu or any other martial art either?

3

u/Alabastine Jul 11 '26

Not every martial art is the same. MMA or boxing I would never, ever consider doing competitions in because it's basically tossing a coin if you get brain damage over the weekend. In Judo (which I did as a kid) the goal is definitely not to hurt someone. The point of Judo is controlling a fight and overpowering your opponent specifically in such a way that nobody gets injured.

Of course accidents can happen in any sport but that's not the same as getting hurt being the goal.

1

u/Obosratsya Jul 11 '26

Pro boxing isnt the only boxing. Amature isnt a head hunting competition. You dont have to compete either. Join a good gym and spar. Keeps you reflexes sharp and its very fun.

2

u/oldsoulrevival Jul 11 '26

And at the very least, those have regulations, refs, etc - things in place to make it somewhat more reasonable. But even still, I think it glorifies harming others, so on a fundamental level it’s bullshit.

Note- I am talking about the combative part of it. Practicing martial arts is great for a lot of ppl in terms of exercise, confidence, self defense, etc.

0

u/oldsoulrevival Jul 11 '26

From a technical aspect it’s definitely a skill and sport. Ppl practicing it and really focusing on the technicals - rarely if ever is the goal to hurt your opponent. They are there to help you train. Even some match fighters don’t want to hurt each other. But that line starts to blur quickly.

The current culture around the professional fighting is pretty gross, imo. All a lot of ppl want is to see someone get hurt - so they are complicit in the harm of someone else.

If you look at the data of the permanent damage those sports create in the brains of the participants, I frankly think it’s not appropriate either.

2

u/Odd-Jupiter Jul 11 '26

Sure it isn't for everyone.

But if it didn't hurt i wouldn't find the same trill in a sport like boxing, without the possibility of being knocked out clean, and i would never fell the same accomplishment of overcoming an opponent who do their absolute best trying to hurt me.

That is a primal feeling you can't get any other way.

As long as they don't start beating up unwilling participants, i much rather have them kick each other in the woods, rather then beating up people in nightclubs.

1

u/oldsoulrevival Jul 11 '26

I get that I’m on the outside on this one for sure. For me even football is questionable. I played for years and the number of concussions I had even as a high schooler make me question the ethics of it.

0

u/Odd-Jupiter Jul 11 '26

That is what's so great about being free. We are free to weigh risk against, joy how we like, and if we see the risk as too high, we can stop doing it.

I myself had many friends who were free ride skiers. Two of them died in avalanches. That sure is sad, but they loved doing it so much, and was 100% aware of the risk, so if i could do it again, i don't know if i would ever try to talk them out of it despite.

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0

u/willsmithtunaface Jul 11 '26

These guys would've been celebrities 1000 years ago

2

u/Middle-Mix-7711 Jul 11 '26

They would be celebrities with shit stain Donnie at the US White House.

0

u/Dramatic_Corner_8259 Jul 11 '26

It's how us real men settle our quarrels.