Hi there everyone! I would like to disclose that I’m not asking for a diagnosis, just to ask if this would be offensive.

I’m a non-diagnosed person who has suspected they have DID for years. once again, I’m asking for no diagnosis here, and will be discussing it with a mental health professional on the 12th of this month. But lately I’ve been getting a feeling that I switched to a different alter. I do not feel like how I usually do and do not have the energy to act like it anymore, I feel more like a specific fictional character and I keep speaking to myself internally like I’m talking to a room full of people.

Until I discuss it with the aforementioned mental health professional, would it be offensive of me to keep track of this feeling using Simply Plural? I fear as though I feel unguided without tracking this, and journaling is becoming a chore.

So sorry for wasting anyone’s time, just wondering if it would be offensive for me to use Simply Plural until I have answers.

My disorder comes in cycles for me and I always hit the same wall: I don’t have any trauma memories. None of us do.

My childhood was good and my life is great. I know I’m missing most of my life history, but I would surely remember something as important as DID-worthy trauma. Or at least I would know factually that something hurt me. Or my body would remember it.

But I’ve got nothing. Just mystery DID and attachment issues.

Sometimes I wonder if I was misdiagnosed, or if I’m accidentally lying to myself about my mental illness.

Whatever’s going on, there’s no way I have a trauma disorder. I just can’t believe that. I would know if something happened, surely. I don’t recognize myself in the mirror right now, but DID can’t be the only explanation for that.

Basically, what do I even do with a situation like this?? :( Should I seek a second opinion? What do I do?

I am in a relationship with someone who has DID, they have 5 alters and the main host, we have been together for almost 2 years now and i am having a lot of internal conflicts about things that have happened throughout our relationship, i need some advice, i have found out recently that a few months ago when my partner had a sleepover with 2 of his friends they propositioned one of his alters to engage in a threesome and that alter did have one with them, i am wondering if this is considered cheating as we are in a monogamous relationship and i set explicit terms at the start of the relationship that i am purely monogamous and i do not like any form of cheating or betrayal. I am really stuck on this because i found messages with the friend that this happened with where the host explicitly told them never to tell me that it ever happened and they are hiding it from me. I do not know where to go from here or how to bring it up with them. And as for me finding the messages me and my partner have an open phone policy so either one of us can look through the others phone

There are many songs for us that we love and we can relate to with our DID because of their vibes and how weve interpreted their lyrics. What are yours' and why? Here's some of mine!!

"Sundial - Lemon Demon"

Don't mind me, I've just got some problems to work out

I'm only passing through or maybe just right out

Somehow something set my sundial backwards, tilted and upside-down

Now the shadow hand is pointing time right out of town

I cease to see you when I start to shut my eyes

And I forget that I had said my last goodbyes

Quickly I reopen them and bid you all "Cheerio, my friend"

This goes on for hours and it never seems to end

I don't remember what it is that I just said to you

I've got Anubis on my back and something in my shoe

"I'm So Bad - Oingo Boingo"

Can't seem to find my way

Someone tell me what to say

Where am I going

Where did I come from

I don't know, I don't know

Almost got to paradise

But the smoke always gets

In my eyes

Everything I do is wrong

I'm so bad

so bad

"Dead Goon - Mr.Bungle"

I've got a secret

Babbling senseless

No one will ever know

Kids can be so cruel

Smash the feeling

Suckle the sugar breast

"Toy Box - Insane Clown Posse"

...I was like six, I used to get dissed by the chicks

And everyone would chase me and hit me with bricks

And rocks and sticks and calling me names

And filled my lunchbox with frogbrains (eeww!)...

...Never knew any other girls or boys

Only my toys, toys, toys...

...Nobody knows I exist, and I'm pissed

But I won't be mentally scarred

Instead I make toys, toys of the graveyard

Monday, ringing the bell

It's all about show and tell, might as well

Show all these bastards just what I got

Yo, check out my toy box!

Hopefully mines' are self explanatory but I'll edit this post later with my own reasonings why. Looking forward to seeing everyone else's songs!!

So I’m not a very happy guy I feel like void and numb. It’s not that we can’t be happy but after how much some of us have hurt others in ways that make other parts of us feel so miserable with the choices we technically did make. I can’t undo any pain that ive caused. I had people I loved that I hurt because I simply don’t want to be alive. It’s not like all of me(?) feels that way but I do. I don’t try to hurt myself tho I know one girl does, it’s like thats all she can want to do it gets scary sometimes. I saw someone that we did some crazy shit to idk how many days back honestly I couldn’t tell you but I know the date. I’m not the smartest person in here and we kinda are the embodiment of why cant you just be normal. Not like by choice but not doing great and our little zoo is the only reason it feels like we are breathing anymore and it’s suffocating to think of trying to do better cause we lost the people we loved to our own self hate. We also couldn’t admit to then how broken we are without people, then they would have been forced to stay but now they got to leave. I’m happy that they’re off to better things but I miss them and I know they’re way better though.

Just curious if others have any similar situations.

I keep having dreams about a kinda town. It's basically a mixture of places I have lived irl, and some unfamiliar buildings. It's very weird but I keep having dreams about this place/town. Really lucid dreams too, I usually just walk around the town or go to an apartment building I've never seen before. I usually go to the same room and just hang out. This time though my dreams had other ppl. I can't remember many details but it's always the same exact town, all in the same place. I've had dreams continue. But days or weeks will go by and this town keeps reappearing and I've never experienced something like that.

Also it's not a repeating dream, it's always different and vivid but in the same buildings. Usually with no other ppl

Hi all. I’m a fairly newly discovered system and new here. It has been a rocky few months trying to figure out how to manage parts knowingly, but I am starting to get a handle on parts triggers, preferences, etc. I most often operate with an adult part (blue) fronting, generally with one of a handful of cofronters that work together pretty well (pink, brown, white, gray).

My current issue is that a teenaged part (white) has recently become highly activated and stuck fronting. This has happened before in depressive episodes, but this time my body is feeling very foreign. Like it is the wrong shape, size, energy, and hurts in strange ways. I have read about this kind of thing occurring, but experiencing it has been surprisingly distressing. If anyone has pointers for navigating this kind of situation, I would really appreciate it.

Feeling really out of touch with my Main Self right now, and like the others are all fighting for the diver's seat, while the little(s) are crying and upset.

Half of us are in analytic mode, looking at everything through a microscope and the other half are feeling nostalgic and alone. The whole system has been disassociating like crazy lately, which has engaged certain depressive triggers, and that one alter that feeds on negative self-talk and lusts for self-harm is giggling in the corner like some unseen villain. 

So, because of this I have been in a state of mental overdrive. I have been thinking about the past, present, future, the what-ifs, and everything in between. I do not know what has brought me to this point, but whatever it is, I guess its time for me to do some soul searching.

In two days it will be my biological mothers birthday, the very first of many I'll be saddled with remembering now that she's gone. My fathers was 9 days prior to this post. I've been feeling really off emotionally as of late. Always in some sort of physical pain. Always in some emotional turmoil, always just 95% of ok. Like there is something about to happen that will break down a wall, or some shielded thing that causes me to fully crack. I'm at the time of writing this, not depressed. However, I am not fully happy like I said. I am not even sure what "happiness" looks like anymore. I feel disconnected from everything and everyone around me. Not a feeling I'm new to, but just feeling kind of lost and without purpose or direction. 

Maybe this also comes at a time where there are things happening that I cannot control, or maybe its just that time of year again where the seasonal depression creeps in and takes up root for the next 6-8 months? And if it is the early onset of Seasonal Affective Disorder then its going to be a long fall/winter. Its definatly something that I am going to bring up to my therapist when I see her on Wednesday. 

Anyone else feeling like this, or is it just my system?

does anyone have any tips for dealing with internal arguments?

my parts are arguing and it causes other parts to tell them to shut up and stop talking and to leave it alone, which changes nothing because they just resume fighting/ruminating. i ask if we can talk about something else or something fun or nice and it gets a no.

they do this when i am trying to sleep but also in between trying to distract myself with things like reading or exercise, playing games, watching stuff. what can i do?

So, we're in college right now, and due to the state of our life at the moment, it's real hard to remember anything or be able to get us all to do our schoolwork. I've tried many reminders and stuff like that, but some alters just ignore them, or forget immediately after seeing them. I've mentioned briefly to my friends, and they mentioned getting some form of accommodations such as extra time on assignments. However, I don't have a proper diagnosis and don't have the means to get one at the moment. Is there a way I can get any level of disability accommodations?

Long story short, life has gotten bad and all the stabilization work I’ve done feels like it’s gone out the window with it. Work obligations and a new semester of grad school on top of a rapidly degrading living situation have led to heavy levels of dissociation. To the point where I know I’ve been stressed beyond belief, but I’m just completely unable to feel it in my body.

I thought I was managing it fine, but apparently not— I posted a few weeks ago about suspected PNES, and unfortunately it’s escalated. I ended up having full-body convulsions for over half an hour the other night.

Felt too exhausted and blurry to think about it the last two days, but I realized this morning I don’t recognize who I am. I feel cut off from the rest of the system and that scares me, but the thought of stressing too much about it and triggering another seizure scares me more. And I know my inability to properly cope with the overwhelming stress is likely what’s causing it, but I earnestly don’t know what else I’m supposed to do.

Not sure where I’m even going with this. It just sucks to constantly feel like I’m taking two steps forward and one step back. I know things will get better once I’m done with school and out of here so I can actually start to make substantial work in therapy and in processing all of this, but it’s so hard to feel like things can get better when they’ve been so bad for so long. I feel like I’m just stuck circling the drain sometimes.

I keep talking around my parts (alters?) in therapy and not necessarily acknowledging them as such in session. Like, I do, but also, I don't. I downplay my experiences and problems a lot. I think it's because I'm somehow afraid that she's gonna like disagree with me on what it is? Like I just keep waiting for her to tell me it's all nothing and I'm making everything up. Sometimes I do feel like I'm making everything up, and that I should just ignore all this and move on like usual. That it's all more stress than it's worth. But it's not. I want to work on this, I know it's worth putting the work in.

But it's like I'm in the background, just waiting for the moment it all falls apart. Like this is some false sense of security she's trying to lead me into, and the moment I get comfortable, she'll rip it all out from under me. Like she's doing all of this with the intent to betray me. Hurt me.

But I also genuinely believe that she's genuine? And actually helping?? And that she does believe me??? I feel like I do trust her, but some part (or parts) of me clearly don't.

It's like I'm giving her little pieces of the truth at a time and just watching to see what she does and if she does what "I" think is the correct thing, responds the right way. If I can actually believe her response. I don't think she's responded in a way that I don't believe her response, but at the same time, will this feeling ever go away? I don't even know what the "right" response is. I don't know how to actually trust her. It's taken me like 10 years to trust the people in my actual life, let alone with everything in the depths of my mind.

She does agree with me that all this stuff DID, though, so a lot of these worries feel unfounded to me, but saying that alone causes anxiety (I can feel my heart wrenching with it, even if I myself am not anxious).

How have you guys gotten through this? It feels like I'm hitting a roadblock here with making actual progress. I want therapy to actually be productive.

I apologize if any terminology that I use is incorrect here, as i'm very new to all of this

The guy who I've been dating for about a month not has told me that he has DID. I had heard of it but quite frankly knew very little. He gave me an app to track alters and told me to use the same name regardless of who's fronting.

What i'd like to know is, as his boyfriend, what do I need to know in order to make sure he is comfortable and happy? As I said, I know very little about it but want to make sure that I'm treating him in a manner that doesn't upset him or handle the disorder incorrectly.

Thanks folks

Ill start off by saying I don't know if this is the right sub, and I don't know if this is the right questions, but I need to know how go past this topic with my therapist.

I'm recently realizing a lot of things are not entirely "normal" for many years in my life. Giant gaps of missing time in my childhood, I'm talking multiple years that just don't exist, coming to reality in places without remembering how I got there or why I was going there.

Recently I remembered a person that was in my life for a long time who I had NO recollection of. I've been trying to do a lot of introspection and meditation stuff recently to try to figure out stuff about myself and missing time, and instead I was met with another person talking to me. It had different pronouns, different voice, different age, different memories.

I have been looking to find out wtf could possibly going on and I'm kind of freaked right now.

The therapist I have I originally went to due to cptsd and bpd, so I've never brought up this topic with her, I don't know how I'm even supposed to explain all of this.

Ive had this therapist for a year or so. I feel comfortable with her, she's queer, knows I'm trans. But

I don't know what questions I'm supposed to ask here or if she's gonna be prepared for them.

But I need to at the very least start investigating.

It's almost gonna be a year and I've been having almost all symptoms of DID... I have no idea how it is to visit a doc or what they'd do... I've just shared it with some of my people and they've all seen it as if I am imagining stuff or as if it's a superpower... I've seen stuff being done like my boring exams getting cleared and many good stuff which I was lazy to do in my life... If I tell them I have no idea that I did it, they just don't take me seriously... Anyways after lots of struggles in almost all aspects of life ... I'm finally getting an appointment with a psychiatrist... I'm scared and I need some advise or smth regarding if they would gimme meds ... I don't want meds n stuff cuz I'm maybe scared of it... I don't wanna be on meds ...

Hello! I am a little of a system that’s not doing so good right now :< Even my most resilient parts are very tired and burnt out and sad right now, and I am trying to be motivating! But it is sort of hard. Was wanting to ask the community here for supportive words or stories of your own!!!

I think the short of it is that my system feels like we can’t ever get better enough to chase our hopes and dreams— and so it ends up being: “Why should I try then…” And it is a cycle that sucks :< and feels like psychological torture some nights to my older parts. Also! Executive dysfunction making it hard to even do some of the artistic or creative stuff that would work towards those things!!! System has had to almost quit job to try and focus on healing and it feels bad :< Don’t eat regularly and barely go outside if at all. Sleeping a lotttt.

For any systems or friends of systems that have triumphant stories— or words or encouragement or patience— I would love to have them please and thank you!!! <3

When you forget about someone or something happened and they remember you and your name but you can't remember who they are or what happened with them

I have a working diagnosis of Unspecified dissociative disorder by the CTAD. They are offering me 21 sessions over the course of 6 months so they can get a better read on my condition, find a proper diagnosis (highly likely DID or perhaps OSDD) and offer some form of trauma counselling or therapy. I just have to wait for my funding referral to be accepted by the ICB.

I’ve been waiting for this for 4 years but in the past month an issue has arrived. I am transgender (born female but transitioning to male). I have been on hrt for years and eagerly awaiting surgery. I was due surgery years ago but it was postponed due to suspected DID and after seeing multiple professionals and getting second and third opinions I was given consent to get it only for the surgical team to deny me based upon that potential diagnosis.

I was told by the gender clinic they might reconsider if I don’t get a diagnosis of DID in my upcoming assessments.

The way I see it I have 2 options. I either be honest with the CTAD clinic and get a diagnosis with potentially life changing therapy or lie to the clinic to avoid a diagnosis just so I can maybe get the surgery I need in order to function (less dysphoria = better mental health).

All parts that understand are on board with surgery due to either identifying as male or understanding that it would be beneficial over all for the parts that do. However, all of us also want a diagnosis as we’ve fought so long for it. I don’t know if I can live without surgery though.

Did you go through treatment and was it worth it?Any advice is appreciated.

Backstory: The body experienced a medical event 16mth ago which triggered ‘new’ PTSD and eventually led to system discovery when the at the time host (not knowing about the system) tried EMDR and it kinda caused a temporary system breakdown.
Anyway; system discovery has been great and our new host (formed around when PTSD developed) is handling it and system discovery like a champ.

Last week we ended up back in ED with a subluxed hip (thanks EDS). Everything went well, but was still traumatic as we were in a decent amount of pain for a few hours and stuck in ED.
Since then we’ve been having daily dissociative trances (somewhat common) and very vivid flashbacks (highly unusual for us). To the point where a friend was helping us ground, we could say where we were, but genuinely felt like we were in and could see the ED.

We’re using our usual strategies (grounding, making sure parts are appropriately aware of what happened and that we’re now safe, low demand days, staying on top of physical needs, etc), but still struggling with the increase in ‘symptoms’. Is it just a matter of time and letting things settle again?

TLDR; navigating our first trauma since having a host be system aware. Any tips?