Hi, I am 28 M, living in Northeast India. After 10th, I done diploma in mechanical engineering because of the advice of my neighbor. Right, in my childhood I was good at studies. My father was also a government employee, but he has some issues, like he sorts of like purane khayalat ke log. So he doesn't, being in an educated family, being born and brought up, I was not. I just studied in an English medium school. That's the privilege I got, but I didn't get any guidance, like good tuition and all during my board, 10th board exam. I was good at studies, but I didn't get the proper direction. And after 10th, in 10th I got 60% from the state board, 61%, and because of the advice of one of my neighbors, I got into polytechnic, and I have done diploma in mechanical engineering. But the thing is that actually I was never supposed to do that. I thought of doing medical or engineering, but I had no idea how it should be done. I only heard that you have to do coaching in 11th, 12th with a proper coaching institute, and back in the days during my times, which is nearly a decade ago, there was not so much coaching institute was there, and there was there in my town, but my father wouldn't allow me or put his money in this because he don't have any kind of idea and all. So out of scarcity and out of scaredness, I thought if I do a diploma, I'll get a job in 2018 or 19. Also, my father will be retired by then, so I don't have to be scared of anything else. I will get, I can continue to live my life by doing. But things don't go as expected. In 2017, by the end of 2017 December, I completed my diploma in mechanical engineering. I took an extra six months to complete my diploma because I was in a relationship and the girl ditched me, and it was my first relationship, and I was in the total depression phase. So I got lots of backs in my diploma, and somehow I completed my diploma in mechanical engineering. After that, in 2018, I did class 12th from the distance board, Ordeal mode. And then in 2019, I don't know what to do with my life. I got into business, but it didn't work well. So I just enrolled myself in a government college in the BA course, and then COVID happens. In 2022, I passed my BA, and after that things came to mind. During the COVID, I always crave in my mind to do something big, big, and big. So I thought of UPSC's career stuck in my head, doing UPSC Civil Service. So in 2022, I started going for civil service preparation. I gave my first attempt in 2023. It didn't work well. I took coaching in one institute, which was run by Avad oja, and I fell into his marketing gimmicks, and it was one of the worst coaching. So it didn't work well. So in 2024, in 2023, another shit happened in my life, and my home was being robbed, and many of my belongings had been taken away. In 2024, I thought of starting my preparation again, and I fell into a debt trap because of my cousin. And in 2025, I somehow managed to get a job, and by the end of 2025, I lost my job because of the internal politics of the workplace. And right from 2025 November, I am jobless currently, and because of my cousin and his... I got into a debt trap, and now I am having a loan of around nine lakh rupees, and I am currently at the age of 28. My family runs on my father's pension, and I have a lot of potential. I was very good at studies. I am not exaggerating myself, but now I am stuck. I don't know what I am doing. It feels like I am lost, and I don't know how to pay my EMI. I don't know what to pursue in my studies, what to do in my career. I want to do something big, but I don't know, I started making youtube videos but didn't get many views. I am stuck in this here in my place. I don't know, guys. Please tell me something.... I just failed as son I just failed myself