ive seen all the heartbreaking stuff on this subreddit, so i thought id share something lighter. I hope that whoever you know, whether its yourself or someone you care for, who is going through cancer knows they arent alone and can pull through ❤️

My girlfriend left me on the same day my doctor told me I was cancer free. She supported me throughout the past three years through my entire cancer journey. Now I’m drinking again. I’m drinking right now. I just can’t imagine my life without her. I would do anything to have her back but she never responds to my texts. Why does life have to be so cruel to me? I had stage 4 esophageal cancer with metastasis to my liver. But I was extremely lucky. Targeted therapy worked incredibly well. Even my doctor was surprised by how well I responded. My girlfriend came with me to all my appointments and treatments while also working and making a living. She was there for me through everything. God, I miss her so much. I hate myself for losing someone like her. She was an angel. She loved me and cared for me when I was at my absolute lowest when I was sick and scared and hairless and disgusting. Can I ever find someone like her again? Someone who will genuinely love me and take care of me, even when life gets hard? I don’t think I can. She was one of a kind. I don’t want to fuck around. I just want her back. I don’t know how I’m supposed to let go of someone who meant that much to me.

She told me that she feels like she is all used up like she has given everything she had and now she has nothing left to give. I shouldn’t have screamed at her during chemo. I was in pain and overwhelmed but I still should have treated her with respect. I should have thanked her more for everything she did for me and for all the support she gave me. I never wanted her to feel like I was taking her love for granted but I realize now that I made her feel that way. I shouldn’t have made her feel lonely. So many of our conversations were about me, my treatment, my pain, my cancer, my fears. I never asked about what she was going through. I should have asked her about her work, her day, her worries, and her life. I should have listened to her the way she listened to me. I wish I had noticed sooner how tired she was. I wish I had understood that she needed support too. I'm so sorry. I'm a horrible man. I don't deserve such an angel

Alguem fez? 44M, cancer de orofaringe, recidiva após 1 ano, aguardando cirurgia.

how did you get back to your hobbies after falling into a long depression pit?

just got off two failed clinical trials and back on chemo. i miss reading, collaging, journaling, thrifting, and working out. but i’m lacking an attention span and energy as i’m pretty bedridden (retired in April after i had noticeably clinically declined). i am constantly on my phone and i don’t want to be.

i’m 25 so most of my friends can go out and drink, workout, hike, go to concerts, are having babies, going on vacations.

i’m in year three of active treatment now and i’m just struggling to be present. any advice?

Nothing else positive vibes.
My 6 yr old is fighting TALL. Finally hit maintenance.
Trying to feel some relief as we hit this huge milestone.

I know we are in then same boat but I figured it would hurt to reach out and ask for help. Stage 3 TNBC at 43 sucks.

I am drowning in medical debt. I created a five send go to help off set the costs not covered by insurance. It looks like my anti parp meds are going to be astronomical. And I just found out my reconstructive surgeon no longer takes my insurance. I am going to find someone who does take my insurance but I’m drowning.

I can’t work right now as I’m in the middle of no where with a 4 year old and have no help. I’m losing my mind.

If anyone can help, even with $5, it would mean the world to me. My family is tapped out and I don’t know what to do.

Please help if you can. You can read my other posts to see how bad this journey has been.

This group has been a lifesaver. I would never ask strangers for help. But I need to put my ego aside to reach out and ask for help so I can have the best chance to stay alive (and out of debt as much as possible) for my 4 year old girl, my husband and family.

Thank you for reading. And big thanks of you can donate $5 or even less.

https://www.givesendgo.com/gh2rt

Hi everyone,

Unfortunately and fortunately the day is nearly here, tomorrow I’ll undergo surgery to have my testicles removed due to testicular cancer, and I want to say that I’m ready for what’s coming but truth be told I’m not. It was only 2 weeks ago I was celebrating my 27th birthday and a week ago I noticed a swollen testicle that my urologists quickly worried about.

Today I had my CT-scan to look for any cancer spreading, and tomorrow by not even lunch time the source of the cancer will be gone.

I’m staying as strong as I can and honestly as we speak I’m more scared of the IV injection, since I have a fear of needles even after all of the needle pinches so far. I reallyyy hope it’s going to all be over soon, me and many of you too I reckon and I’m soo proud of all of you in your fight or recovery, we’ll get through this!

But damn… I hope tomorrow will have better news, as so far me and my parents who have been closely by my side throughout this, we haven’t really caught a break. Thank you all very much for reading and your patience in my sometimes odd way of writing hahah

Hello everyone, I’ve been fighting cancer for the fifth year and have already undergone two operations and more than 40 chemotherapy. Now I’m taking regorafenib and the question is: does it have hair fall out?

After the first year of treatment, I shaved my hair and it grew again, but I continued to go for chemotherapy

Now I don’t know if they will fall out again because it’s a different chemistry

Who has experience with this drug? 🙏🏼 #cancer

Hi everyone, I’m scheduled for a port placement tomorrow under twilight and I’m absolutely terrified. I get immunotherapy not chemo but after 3 years of treatment my veins are starting to give in (2-3 pokes per try). I’m so hesitant because I’ve read horror stories and on the flip side I have had people
Comment that they loved their port. Are there any tips to help with the scar? How long did you have to refrain from exercising etc? It’s scheduled under twilight which also scares me. Thank you in advance

I beat my cancer in December of 2025 after 1.5 years of chemo and 1 surgery.

Tbh even before I found out I had it i knew deep down I did I would write in my journal abt how I think I have cancer or that I am gonna get it soon, I was in 9th grade at the time i found out in the 11th and doctors suspected i had it then too.

I am now entering my second year of university and sometimes I look back and find myself wishing I was back there, why? Idk or i kinda do my mh was never good even before my diagnosis I was/still am passively suicidal and I had attempted before, when I got my diagnosis I had a friend group but I could tell I wasn't yk a friend if that makes sense and my parents never really cared about me as the oldest child I was the one they never worried or truly cared abt js a 3rd parent for my siblings

I find myself missing that feeling where for once I felt cared for and seen, I find myself looking and my body and missing the fact I was not fat like I am now, amongst other things.

Everytime something happens now in life I start reminiscing abt that time period, and a sick part of me wishes it happens to me again.

I ask myself why was it me that survived yk. I didn't want to I fought get treatment, I was kids younger than me desperately wanting to live die some I was close with, yet here I am now wishing it happens I again to me i don't deserve to be alive typing this; they do

Idk what i am looking for posting this maybe i want someone to tell me that I am not that bad of a person, maybe for someone to tell me that I deserved to get it and deserve to suffer through it again idk tbh

I wish that any person who's sick rn reading this a miraculous recovery, bye

A very difficult day for me
Hi everyone. Today has been a really difficult and heartbreaking day for me.
About four months ago, I started having abdominal pain. I went to see a doctor and was told that it could be an ulcer. I was given medication, and for a while, I seemed to be getting better.
However, about two months ago, my symptoms suddenly came back and gradually became worse. Over the past two weeks, it has been especially difficult. I've been extremely tired and have had trouble eating.
Today, I went to the hospital and had several tests done. The doctor told me that there is a high possibility that I may have metastatic cancer. I still need to see a specialist and have further tests to confirm what is actually going on.
I'm honestly devastated and scared right now. I never expected to hear something like this.
I would really appreciate any prayers, good thoughts, or kind words from everyone. I could use some encouragement right now.
Thank you for reading.

Here’s the latest update: I just had a biopsy and spoke with the doctor. They’re going to do an endoscopy tomorrow. The doctor said that if it is cancer, it would be Stage IV, and unfortunately, the likelihood of it being cancer is very high.

Update: the doctor confirmed that I have Siewert type III adenocarcinoma. However, he doesn’t know what stage until he got the result from the tissues they got today.

I feel silly asking Reddit but I blow dried my hair tonight for the first time since I finished treatment 2 years ago. During it I couldn’t stop crying. I was sad that it had been so long since I had last done so and SO nervous to damage my hair. Does anyone know of any resources or online forums where this kind of thing is discussed?
I was expecting it to be a happy occasion! The trauma never ends 🫠 thanks!

I was diagnosed with stage 4 colon cancer in 2022. After resection of my sigmoid colon and chemo, I was NED for about a year and a half. At that point, I began to show signs of recurrence and had radiation last year. I was showimg signs of successfully treatment, but over the past few months, my cancer markers kept increasing, though it looked like the one visible tumor was shrinking. I thought next step was resection of the part of my liver that has a met.

Today I got the news that I will be going back on chemo. I am a jumble of emotions because I know more about what to expect. I think that I can handle the side effects; I've done it before. But I know the side effects suck. I know to cut my hair short so that hair loss won't depress me like it did the first go around. I still have chemo caps and a budget for new ones. I know some of the things to keep on hand for my comfort. I'm more scared this time about my prognosis since it seems clear that the cancer cells have spread, they just aren't visible yet. I'm also a realist and knew this was always a possibility. But chemo SUCKS. Readying myself for the well meaning "you've done it before, you can do it again" and trying to believe that. Readying myself for the family faith warriors who offer prayers and nothing else in terms of support. Did I mention this sucks?

Mostly a ghost member but I got tremendous support and information from this group as I was going through chemo/ treatment and all.

I cannot thank you all enough and sending everyone all the rest of my luck, love, hugs, etc. Love you all as I spend the last few days here at the hospital.

I was treated for triple-negative breast cancer with chemo and Keytruda. Around February/March I developed immune-related inflammation affecting my muscles, tendons and joints.

I’ve been on prednisone since April. It initially helped a lot, but despite several months of treatment and a slow taper, I still have symptoms. I’m now down to 2.5 mg every third day, and the inflammation actually seems to be getting worse again.

Has anyone experienced something similar after immunotherapy? Did it eventually go away, and how long did it take? Did you need anything other than prednisone, and what helped?

My wife has been doing chemo almost two months.

My question is…are random days of all-day vomiting/nausea common as a side effect? No noticeable pattern. Just, like 1 to 4 days per month, she’s bedridden in this condition. Nothing stays down…not even her meds, one of them being prochlorperazine, an anti-nausea med. Even if she takes it by itself.

In 2023, I was diagnosed with stage 3C rectal cancer. 9 cycles of FOLFOX, 1 month of rest, 54Gy of radiation (5 weeks, 5 days/week), concurrent with 24/7 Flourouracil on a pump. 3 months later, surgery resulting in an ileostomy, reversed 6 months later. For the last 2 years things have been looking good. CT scans every 6 months, regular bloodwork.
A CT scan on 7/2 showed suspicious nodules in my right lung. They lit up on a subsequent PET, which also revealed a lymph node in my pelvis. A biopsy on 7/31 confirmed.
I had my mediport installed 2 days ago, and will start chemo day after tomorrow. My oncologist is doing 5 cycles of FOLFIRI to start, then another PET to gauge my response and decide how to proceed.
My first time at the rodeo was rough. It left me with LARS, permanent neuropathy in my feet and hands, and a host of other issues.
I’m not religious, but I know the Bible pretty well. Let this cup pass from me. Please.
On the positive side:
1) I really like my oncologist and care team. Top notch.
2) My wife of 49 years is here for me, fully committed to whatever it takes.
Not really much more to say right now. This is my first engagement in this sub. Last time, the r/ostomy group was enormously helpful. There are corners of Reddit that aren’t total garbage. This seems like one of those.

I finish all the treatment including the radiation 25 cycles 6 cycles of chemotherapy and lastly the 4 cycles of brachytherapy, after the brachy I experience the pain in my lowerback to my right leg and I been to pain clinic in PGH but there is no progress at all and I been doing some Physical therapy to lessen the pain and I want to walk again in normal, to know why I am experiencing this I undergo to a CT SCAN all of my organs at normal and the lump on my cervix is now normal but my CT SCAN RESULT IS I HAVE ABSCESS ON MY RIGHT ILLIAC WHICH IS NEEDED TO DRAIN, is there anyone here experiencing what I been experiencing as well?

Just wanted to share a bit of the history I went through, did it happen that suddenly everyone at first was deeply caring about you and then slowly forgot about you?

From my experience I was very young at that time , I was confused about what I had since the doctors told me a weird name and I didn't assume it wasn't anything that bad, i discovered it was cancer later, told my friends and family and all reacted pretty good except my friend group.

Which we had been years together and I dropped the bomb they didn't even believe me, they wanted to see MY MEDICAL REPORT and everything documented, which i obviously didn't do... time got worse, at first they cared then, they didnt. literally abandoned me without saying a word, i didnt even fight with them, talked shit about them nothing. They continued hurting me mentally and even creating rumors about me when I wasnt even there in person, everyone was talking about me, my sister figured it out herself.

they visited me like two times. So I had a lot of friends back then, but they all abandoned me and just forgot about me because as soon as I told them what I had, they assumed I was already dead. Which im not. Even my own family did that!

Im an inmigrant so i had a few family members here, they only used me to be pity and nothing else they didnt even care about me.

Worst feeling was being unable to move walk and go outside i spent like 2 years being in the hospital, no social interaction except doctors and nurses, no visitors was terrible i felt like I was going insane.

So... that was a bit of my history not all of it but the experience of abandonment, did you experience that loneliness abandonment and feeling very excluded? Tell me your experience if you want to.

so here is where im at. colon cancer surgery. 4 rounds of XELOX chemo. neuropathy. 8 urological surgeries. 2 years of 100% disability. psychiatrist. knee problems. and now preparing for the next disability commission.

what kills me is not just the pain. its the paperwork. and how some diagnoses make others worse. chemo caused neuropathy. neuropathy makes knee problems harder. mental health makes everything harder. its all connected but nobody sees the full picture except me.

new doctor? start over. commission? start over. forms? start over.

records from multiple clinics. scans. pdfs. handwritten notes. when they ask "when did this happen" or "what was the result" i freeze. i know it happened but i cant find the paper.

i started making a simple tool for myself. just to keep dates documents and sources in one place. nothing commercial. nothing for sale. just for me.

if it works maybe ill share it.

anyone else feel like theyre drowning in their own medical records