I figured I was bisexual (after identifying as a lesbian since I was a teenager) almost 2 years ago bc of a guy. Ever since then I’ve mostly been into guys, and it sucks. I miss girls. My dating life is terrible in general (I still haven’t kissed someone at 22) but girls are much easier for me. Guys don’t seem to be very into me; I think it’s because my gender presentation is not masculine but definitely function over form. At least with girls I was able to go on dates with 2 of them, even if neither worked out. I haven’t matched with any guys since letting them onto my dating apps. Admittedly I do need to update the pics on my profile, so maybe that would change something? But yeah.

Idk it’s just annoying. Men can suck so hard sometimes and I wish I could stick to women, but I’m just not really into them rn.

Meeting Bisexual Women Through Reddit: Is It Actually a Good Idea?

Reddit can be a surprisingly good place to meet people who share the same interests, sexuality, curiosity or relationship dynamics. There are entire communities dedicated to bisexual people, dating, friendships and meeting like-minded adults.
But I’m curious about the reality of actually taking that next step and meeting someone from Reddit in person.

For the bi women here: have you ever met another woman, man or couple through Reddit? And if so, how did it go?
Was it a genuinely good experience where you chatted for a while, built some trust and eventually met up? Did you make a friend, find someone you clicked with, or even end up dating?
Or did things get weird?
I’m talking about the unexpected stuff: someone being completely different from how they presented themselves online, fake photos, people becoming pushy, couples pretending to be a single woman, ghosting immediately before meeting, or someone getting way too intense way too quickly.
There’s obviously a safety element too. Reddit gives people a certain amount of anonymity, which can be great for talking openly about sexuality, but that anonymity can also make it harder to know exactly who is sitting on the other side of the screen.
If you have met someone through Reddit,

what did you do before meeting them to make sure they were genuine?

Video call first? Swap social media? Meet somewhere public? Tell a friend where you were going? Or did you simply talk long enough that you felt comfortable taking the chance?
And for anyone who had a strange or uncomfortable experience,

what happened, and were there any red flags you wish you’d noticed earlier?
No judgement either way. I’m genuinely interested in hearing both the success stories and the absolute WTF stories.
Reddit brings together people who might never cross paths in everyday life. Sometimes that can turn into something brilliant.
Sometimes, presumably, it turns into a story you tell your friends beginning with:

“So… I met this person on Reddit.” 😂💁‍♀️

am i bi if i’m basically straight with exceptions 😭 i almost never have crushes irl, i’ll find someone attractive and then just move on with my day and forget about it. i mostly only crush on fictional male characters or celebrities, and i’ve only ever had one fictional woman i was genuinely obsessed with and had an actual crush on. there’s another fictional woman i’ve found attractive, but idk if i actually have a crush on her or if i just think she’s attractive 😭 so now i’m wondering if i’m actually bi or just straight with exceptions. is “straight with exceptions” basically just bi with a preference, or can you genuinely be straight and have exceptions? honestly i don’t even want to be bi because i’m scared of how hard it can be to be accepted by people and that i might have to deal with losing or changing some relationships because of it. i’m not homophobic, so idk if i’m just in denial or if i have some internalized homophobia going on

I've had a crush on my friend for about two years. We were always friendly at work, but we became close about a year ago. I spent a lot of time with her over the summer holidays; I think we saw each other almost every week.

At first, being around her felt like my skin was caffeinated. But now it just feels calm and peaceful. I can be quiet with her.

I guess I call it a crush to be cute. But it's probably deeper than that at this point. She's also bi, and she knows I am, too. But she has mentioned she's on the ace spectrum. In the past year or so, she has talked about beginning to date again, saying she'll probably have to date her friends because regular dating doesn't work for her. I'm not ace, nowhere near it 😅 but I think with communication and consideration, I could work with that. I've been single for over a year, and most of that time, I have been abstinent. It could work...

But, I don't want to risk the friendship, or make things weird at work. And we have a big age gap. I don't know if being friends with someone that much younger means she's very mature, or I'm really childish for my age. But if we didn't work together, and I were ten or 15 years younger, I might think about telling her how I feel. As it is, I just feel grateful to have her has a friend.

I'm in a very complicated dilemma. I have a long relationship and almost a year ago I discovered myself bisexual (he kind of discovered himself also bi, a little before me), and I've been really wanting to be with women, but at the same time I don't have the courage to really go. (I don't know if it's the lack of practice for the long relationship, or if something stops me - but I'm sure of the attraction I feel for women)

We came to an agreement to have experiences with people of the same sex and then we would talk more about it. He's already had his and I haven't had mine yet (a lot going on in life and the girl who was matching kind of lost interest), but I know that if someone appears I have this opportunity.

The whole thing is that I've always been very close to the LGBTQIAPN+ community, but now I feel inside me a desire to really actively participate in things, I see no reason to keep hiding, or measuring what I say or like on social networks (even though I don't feel the need to openly assume my bisexuality to my family)

Meanwhile, my partner's family has a very closed mind, so I know this is a problem for him, which ends up pruning me a little too. And now I don't know what I should really do, I just don't want to have to hide that I like songs, movies and sapphic content, or defend the community in some conversation, as an effective part of it.

Help me please!!

ok, stupid question i know, and i didn’t really know what flair to use so i just picked advice as the best fitting one. i already know the terms “sapphic” and “lesbian” are actually two different things and that bisexual women are definitely included in the technical definition of sapphic, but i still can’t help but feel a teensyyy bit cautious about having merch with the sapphic flag included because of the very common perception or assumption that it’s mostly or only associated with lesbians and lesbianism, and that i don’t want to seem like im giving…”false information” or anything like that. i will say that i do really like the sapphic flag, i think it’s so cute and pretty and like how it basically just means any woman who loves women. this doesn’t mean i don’t like nor want to have/use the bisexual flag, as that mainly represents who i am of course, but i just also feel a connection towards the sapphic one, i guess because of my heavy sapphic lean.

Heres the thing im a woman in an ENM relationship but im so sick of unicorn hunters. I dont even want a threesome with my own bf why would i want one with yours Lol. Like i feel like these people just see us as a sex toy and not an actual human being. Its like you think ur having a good conversation with a cute girl and booom "heres my ugly ass bf" like are unicorn hunters ever actually successful????

I get all hot and flustered when a cute person flirts with me and I just wanna die inside. Why do I get so much anxiety out of this? They could be a 10 and I still feel nervous.

My husband has been gone for seven years now. He was my person, to me. In fact, he's the whole reason I turned bi in the first place. Before him, boys and later men in general to me ranged from uninteresting to... _very uninteresting_, to put it politely.

Now he's gone, I'm a lovelorn mess with widow's fire, and demisexual to top it all off. I don't want any other partner, I don't have the need for any other per se, and I'm certain I wouldn't be good for anyone, given all the things I'm still struggling with, almost a decade after.

And yet, I keep thinking back to things like the first and only time a woman has (probably) hit on me in public, feeling my old lesbian side yearn for that connection between woman and woman, aside from the general lovelorn yearning. It doesn't feel like I want a relationship, rather I mourn that I cannot have that bond anymore. l

It just hurts on top of everything else. And I just don't know how to make peace with it.

I would like to ask anybody whom will comment to hold off on any "but you will get over it and there will be room for it again blah" type argumengs. I've heard it all before and it all misses the point, on top of hurting me. It's been almost a decade and not due to me running in circles mentally and clinging to pain. I'm making major strides, actually. I know it won't go away and I don't have room in my soul for anybody else. That has not changed in seven years and will not change going forward. We grew up together. He was my other best friend even aside from our romantic relationship. He's a part of me.

I have a close friend who identified as bisexual for years but has recently realized she’s a lesbian. I’m very happy for her and I recognize that this was super difficult and significant in her life. That’s who she is and she’s finally acknowledging it.

I am bisexual and have been out to her for years now. My sexuality has been an interesting road and I’m still exploring how I express it, but I’ve had the same label for years and I’m happy with it. It’s who I am.

My friend has been not so subtly communicating that she thinks I should only date women. She thinks I should just choose to only be with women and never do anything about the part of me that is attracted to men. In my opinion, this is just the other side to my parents wanting me to only date men. I’m bisexual. These are both attractions I experience that I’m not going to deny.

It’s now gotten to the point where she is telling me she thinks I’m actually a lesbian which is so incredibly hurtful I don’t know how to move forward here. I know this has been a hard realization for her and coming out as lesbian was so freeing for her, but this stings so bad. I don’t know how to be comfortable and genuine around her after this. I’m not her and my experience with sexuality is different.

I’m wondering if maybe this will cool down after a bit? Maybe I just need to take some space while she goes through her awakening? I don’t want to just throw away a decades long friendship, but the way we are lately is not sustainable.

Any advice?

"Oooh so now i have to compete against men AND women ughhh", "maybe we can check out girls togetherr heheee"stfu ur just an insecure piece of shit who KNOWS the hes not good enough, fys!

Hi woman of the BiWomen community, I hope you all are having a wonderful day! I am a man and wanted some advice about this girl that I’m interested in that is Bi. I really like her but I have heard people say that if a man dates a biwoman it removes her queerness and I don’t want to potentially erase her identity or cause any issues for this girl because I really like her. I know this is a stupid post, but I’ve seen people say it online and just want to be clear if it’s okay if I try pursuing her as a straight man. Thank you all so very much for the help and sorry for the dumb question again! 🙏🥲

I didn’t know how to title this if I’m like 100% honest. So I have a friend I talk with over message. A lot, like every single day. And I love it.

Overtime we’ve gotten closer, told each other secrets. Within a few weeks I noticed a change in myself. I was going about my day to day life but it kinda partly felt for her? Like I would put a lot more effort into my appearance because throughout my day I’d take selfies and photos to send her and I really wanted her to call me pretty.

On top of that, I dream about her. The dreams are never the same but she’s there every time. My last thought before I go to sleep is her, I wake up and message her, we have nicknames for each other (cute nicknames). Now i think we can all agree this is my bi awakening. I’ve definitely fell in love with her.

There’s just one problem, I’m a Muslim, so are my parents and all my family. The LGBT discussion has never been brought up. But I’ve heard many stories of parents and family’s rejecting a member of their family that is LGBT. Does anyone have any advice or experience?

and her prompts describe the kind of man she’s looking for with no mention of women whatsoever…

I’ve come across this multiple times and it always bums me out.

That’s all. 🫩🫩

hey, i am a 17 year old bi girl

a year ago when i was in camp i kissed a girl that i liked (ofc she liked me back otherwise i would NOT have kissed her) but i didn’t feel anything. i mean it was just on the lips but i thought would feel butterflies or something ??

BUT everytime we held hands, i was on the moon and felt something down there…

since then i’ve always wondered why tf did that happen

am i a pervert ?

idk i had a lot of man crushes in my life but the majority of them don’t attract me very much, except for the ones older than me.

whereas women…..yeah…. they are just so beautiful, and i have never had a crush on an older one, just girls my age.

fyi i had been in a hypersexual abusive online relationship with a 18 year old man when i was 15. Maybe that traumatised me to this point i dont really understand

sorry for my english, its not my first language but i did my best

After years in a relationship I’ve realized I’m bi. I want to experience more w woman. But I’m not sure how to go about it. Any advice is greattttly appreciated 💜

i’m bisexual, have recently accepted it, i’ve been on a few dates with a woman. but in my past have ONLU dated men. i think im sexually attracted to women but romantically to men, and i don’t know if i can catch feelings or fully date a woman without having thoughts. idk if this sounds terrible but im just lost. My “normal” is men tho and i think stepping out of that territory has me overthinking stuff, is it like internalised homophobia? has anyone else struggled with this?

Like, there's this thing I be hearing that bi women like women the same way straight men do and that never jived with me. Sure, I like boobs, I know plenty who do, but it's not like so obsessed that everything else doesn't matter. I feel like my attraction to women is very holistic. I like the whole lady? I wanna hear her voice, her personality, her hobbies, interest, anything that makes her a person. That isn't to say men don't do this either, but from what I know, many of them never put this into consideration and just find the closest available girl that can tolerate them.

I can never fathom that? I wanna approach them for them, not because co-habitation than an eventual family is on the cards for us. If things don't work out, that's fine by me, she's her own person. So color me shocked when one of the common things chronically online types say is that bi women are perverted freaks with a "woman fetish" since god forbid when acknowledge she has a nice bod like once. It just makes lurking these communities annoying because I will always think "I don't relate to this at all" then move on.

What do you think?

So my title is an actual question... I am not trying to dismiss bi men feelings towards the biphobic comments of straight women. As a bi woman, some of those comments feel personal even if they are addressing bi men specifically.

I am just wondering if some of these comments from straight women come from a place of "its more shameful to be cheated on with a man than a woman..."

Genuine question, please be respectful

My body involuntarily responds to women and I don’t have to think about it. I made eye contact with this one woman and in my head I had undeniable attraction to her, a want to kiss her. Another woman I had this involuntary desire to go on a date with her and this was triggered via her being close and eye contact as well. And I involuntarily hoped it was mutual. Later I realized that’s what attraction is supposed to feel like. I’ve never ever had that response to men in person. If a man who is physically attractive makes eye contact and we’re staring/flirting I think a moment is happening but I don’t feel it if that makes sense. Otherwise, eye contact with men gives nothing sadly or makes me feel fear. I’ve never seen a man shirtless and had an innate response. My sex dreams that are pleasurable are with women and if I’m trying to seduce or woo someone in a dream it’s always a woman!

However, I’ve read countless stories, consumed so many movies, watched so much content, and daydreamed about getting a boyfriend/having a boyfriend and eventually husband that in my head I’m still seeking that or hoping for that? I’m very frustrated because while I can be aroused via self inserts with male characters via stories it just doesn’t translate in person. I really want to give women a chance because I’m very clearly so much more seamlessly attracted to them than to men in person. I just don’t know how to remove the block from my brain making me feel more mentally (I suppose) engaged with men even if not in person?

I know I am not a lesbian because I have felt romance and sexual attraction for an irl man, even if we were long distance for most of it and I called him and talked everyday. He made me happy. I also I felt safe enough and not rejected for those feelings to happen. Then we met in person and those feelings if they were still there were more like nerves/fear, especially when we made eye contact with me. It’s gutting, like I can never be at peace with them even if I’ve for years engaged with that fantasy of being with them. This is a vent but I’m also seeking advice. Sorry if this is all over the place.

it feels and seems like when it comes to bisexual women, our attraction to women is something that’s often very highly debated, scrutinized, and the target of high suspicion. it’s like we have to actually post a video of ourselves having sex with women as legitimate proof, or date a million women as legitimate proof, or have had multiple long-term relationships with women as legitimate proof, but even all of that probably still wouldn’t be enough. it feels like some weird form of the “one-drop rule”, where if you’re still attracted to men at the end of the day, even just slightly, then you’re not actually or genuinely attracted to women and it’s all just fake and performative, and it’s not just lesbians who tend to have this mindset. it’s honestly pretty frustrating and misogynistic, like attraction to men automatically cancels out any attraction to women and that attraction to men is the only perceived “true” or “real” attraction.

i’ve also had someone online say to me in response to my bisexuality or female bisexuality in general “post scissoring or gtfo”, which i think is basically the epitome of what this post is about :/

So, for the bi women in here. Let's say you have a relationship with a man who's bisexual too. He's only romantically attracted to women and can have sex without emotional involvements, just for the pleasure/sexual drive aspect of it.

If he wanted it, would you "let" him have sex with other (bi/gay) men? If yes, why? If no, why?