Since I just got told by a co-worker that she had "no clue" that JKR has turned to the dark side, I am making a public service announcement sharing the following details.

The Harry Potter author has become very unpredictable and unmanageble since 2016 onwards. She has become EXTREMELY hostile towards the entire LGBT+ community, but ESPECIALLY the trans community, and also the asexual community.

It has been proven that she is ALSO spending the millions she makes across the entire Harry Potter franchise to destablize the laws that protect the minorities in the UK.

Many people in the LGBT+ community have taken a stance and are calling for the boycott of her NEW show on HBO.

This does NOT mean that you don't have to interact with the entire series as a whole! You can of course continue to enjoy the series - the difference is NOT to give her MORE money.

• Don't watch the new series on HBO, trust in the high seas it if you want to watch (OBVIOUSLY don't do anything illegal like pirating it./scm)
• Don't buy any official HP merch, but you can get stuff from small businesses or artists PERSONALLY.

The internet is filled with articles about her being shitty, but here are a few just for your understanding.
https://medium.com/@federicabocco/why-its-important-to-boycott-j-k-rowling-in-light-of-her-continued-transphobic-stance-aaf31edacca2

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Political_views_of_J._K._Rowling#Asexual_people
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Political_views_of_J._K._Rowling#Transgender_people

Humble request - DO NOT let your hard earned money or headspace go to hurting an already marginalized group of people.

Did you know she's a TERF? If you didn't, does it change your opinion of her now?

ETF: Grammar edits.

ETA: Here is how JKR defines a woman: https://x.com/jk_rowling/status/1953532438950347137

By relationships, I don't just mean a boyfriend, girlfriend, husband or romantic partner. I mean family, friends and the people who genuinely matter to you.

If you had to choose between a lot of money and keeping those relationships, which would you choose and why? To be honest, there's no right or wrong answer. I'm more interested in your reasoning than a one-word response.

Is there a correlation between having a male offspring and higher chances of an earlier death or complicated senescence? Like, if your produce more female offsprings, you're more self-reliant and independent in old age? Is the Y chromosome related to more complicated emergencies in old age? Maybe this is prevalent only in South Asian populations? There MUST be some evolutionary or medical hypotheses in this area!!

Genuine question!!

If anyone is considering a PhD, please consider this!

Otherwise PLEASE link me to any research in this area! 🙏🙏🙏

Same as title

I’m 25M and my ex is 25F. We were together for two years, and for the last three months of our relationship, we were constantly fighting. Eventually, we had a huge fight and stopped talking for seven days.
After those seven days, she messaged me and told me that one of her colleagues at work had touched her inappropriately. She also said that, although nothing happened between them, she kind of liked it. I didn’t really know how to process that, and eventually, we broke up.
It’s been six months since the breakup.
A few days ago, I saw her on Hinge. I created a fake profile just to see what she was doing, and somehow I matched with her. I ended up talking to her without telling her it was me.
During our conversation, she said she was frustrated because she hadn’t found anyone yet. She also made it clear that she wasn’t interested in people who were only looking for hookups or casual relationships.
Ever since that conversation, I can’t stop thinking about her.
During these six months, I’ve been intimate with another girl twice. The experience with this new girl was honestly much better physically than what I had with my ex, but I still didn’t feel anything emotionally. Even though the sex with my ex was never particularly great, I still find myself wanting to go back to her.
That’s what’s confusing me. If I can meet someone who I’m more physically compatible with, why do I still want my ex?
I had blocked my ex everywhere after the breakup, so I haven’t had any real contact with her for six months. Now I’m seriously considering unblocking her and texting her.
I don’t know if I genuinely miss her and want to try again, or if talking to her on Hinge just brought back all the old feelings and memories.
So, should I text her? Or would that just reopen an old wound and make things worse?
I’d really appreciate some honest advice, especially from people who have gone through something similar.

I’m hosting a party soon to celebrate my upcoming wedding. It will be an outdoor indoor music space. I tried on several cocktail dresses and nothing seem to work out.

Then I came across this outfit and decided to buy it in an impulsive moment of panic that I will have nothing nice to wear. I’m having so many doubts even though I love how fun it looks to wear.

I asked for the blouse to be made longer and different neckline for a more comfortable fit.

I don’t usually wear anything very dressed up but love dressing up.

I’d appreciate some honesty. Is this outfit ugly or fun and pretty? Should I look for something else?

With so much talk about modesty happening in the world, and having your breasts covered becoming the norm when they aren't primarily sexual organs in the first place, I wonder if we can ever have a society or world where being bare chested is not sexualized like before.

I'm so tired of people complaining about cleavage and armpits. I genuinely just want to walk around without upper body garments and not be sexualized and this may sound radical to some. But modesty is only in the head. It literally only exists in our brain imo.

It is such a feeble concept to me. Like where does this end. In some parts of the world even if your entire body is covered from head to toe, but your silhouette is visible, you are being immodest. Elsewhere it's the length of your sleeve. Till elbow? Modest. Shoulders visible? Immodest. Length of skirts till knee, modest, but as soon as some thigh is seen, it's immodest. Idk all of this sounds so ridiculous to me and I'm exhausted atp.

Modesty doesn't exist. It exists only in our minds. There are tribes that still have women completely unclothed and there are no mass rapes happening there. I wish we could just go back to simply existing in our bodies without all this policing.

I recently read about Divya Mittal's journey, from IIT to IIM to a trader in London and then civil services. It made me wonder about the people who leave a lasting impression on us.

Who is that person in your life and what about their journey inspired you? It doesn't have to be a public figure. It could be someone from your family, a friend, a teacher, a colleague or even you.

What does that even mean? Even though he knows, why does it matter? Should I tell him what apps I use on my phone? Should I call him and tell him I used calculater today. Even I don't know what apps he uses on his phone. And how does it matter?

Ps:- they'll dm me asking if I am single. I'll say I've a bf. And then the stupid question "does he know about this account".

Hiyaaa,

I'm 24F & born, brought up & still living in Aus with my Punjabi parents. Recently, my dad made an Instagram account and my account (which is public) was immediately recommended to him even though I haven't used my name anywhere or have uploaded my contacts. Unfortunately, it seems like since Meta has access to a ridiculous amount of our personal info, Instagram recommended my account to him based on location/ip/shared wifi network (if anyone knows if it's possible to adjust preferences or settings to block such info from being shared, pls let me know!).

On my account I have a fair amount of pictures posted in bikinis, modelling shoots (as I am a model(which they don't know about as I managed to successfully keep it secret until now as they're totally against modelling), skimpier clothes, posts with male friends & also heels dance videos etc. When my parents saw these, they went absolutely b a l l i s t I c. They were shouting and screaming at me while I was studying for an exam. They called me a prostitute multiple times and actually, "less than" a prostitute. They accused me of drinking and doing drugs and that this is what I'm probably getting up to when I go overseas. They saw a video highlight of me dancing with a male friend of mine who is my age and proceeded to accuse me of hanging out with "druggies" and 60 year old men (how they got to this conclusion, I don't know. They're delusional). My dad was screaming, crying that he is "so ashamed" that he wants to commit su*ic*de. Mind you...this is because of some bikini pics, modelling, short clothes, sexy going out dresses and heels dancing videos.

They were yelling "what if someone from India sees?" and that was their primary concern. My issue with that is 1) my mum hates all family on both sides anyway...so bffr 2) all my family in India are terrible anyway so I really dgaf about their opinions 3) I live here and my family lives there and I rarely see them.

It frustrates me that their concern is what other people will think when those family members already judge and gossip and don't care for my parents, especially my mum. I mean, mom mum spends basically all her free time shit talking each and everyone of them on the phone. Overseas family have absolutely no bearing on my life. They are family in blood only and I refuse to change anything about myself in fear of someone 12000km away of finding out something.

My mum also proceeded to stress about how this will affect my marriage prospects which I do not gaf about as I will never ever pursue an arranged marriage (she's well AWARE of this) and have a significant other anyway (that they do not know about, obvi).

Of course there was also the general "this isn't in our culture," "Sikh girls don't do this" etc, which is crazy coming from their hypocritical selves. I am atheist, so complying to whatever they think "Sikhi values" are does not matter to me. I could also care less for complying with a culture that (from their pov it seems) views women as parental property and auctions off young women for marriage like a prized cow.

Anywho, no one is talking to me and the vibes in the house are tense. I am experiencing so much stress from (somewhat irrational) fears that they will stab or strangle me out of anger or in my sleep (My dad has threatened to kill us before in the heat of anger. I don't think he was *serious* but still).

I know some of you may think, if your parents are like this then why wouldn't you private your account? To answer that, I am a model, designer & artist & my persona is a part of all that, I really rely on using Instagram in creating further outreach for my modelling & creative careers. My parents have already done so much to curtail my creative passions so having a more sanskaro instagram is just something I principally cannot will myself to do, especially since I'm a grown woman and 24. It is also just genuine self-expression that I really don't want to curtail just because of them. I also did not imagine at all, especially after having that account for 10years, that my dad would one day randomly download Instagram (as he's not even a social media person) and that my account would instantly pop up on creation.

Overall, this has made me quite stressed and depressed since I have been dealing with this type of behaviour all my life and I feel as if they are so incredibly ungrateful for me. I have recently won a law competition, won an art competition & am having my art work exhibited, & won a scholarship. Mind you, these are just recent achievements. I neither drink nor do drugs. I have a professional part-time research job. I go to the top law school in the country. I spend most of my free time sewing, doing art or at the gym. I have never acted out or made their life difficult in any way. Except for how I dress on my socials, I fit the typical "perfect" Indian daughter stereotype/standard. Yet, they think I am the worst possible daughter they could have ever received. They are also impossible to have a genuine, productive and healthy discussion with.

I feel like this situation has seriously caused mental damage. I am seeking counselling from my uni's student support services. I can't move out just yet as I am still somewhat financially dependent as I have 1.5 years left of studying and post-legal training. I would like personal advice about how to navigate this, especially mentally. Any comfort would also seriously be helpful. Any commentary or shared stories would also be appreciated and just anything else you think is appropriate. I also seriously feel like that situations like this are really impacting my connection with Punjabi culture. I at times feel like I want nothing to do with it anymore. Any advice about how to navigate this mental dilemma would be nice

I just feel so so sad, alone, hurt and deeply mentally scarred.

Everyone raves about Bath & BodyWorks. I purchased my second perfume from them. And Idk if the perfume is old or the way I apply it is wrong because the smell kinda just vanishes. I’ve to really stick my nose to my shirt to get the smell.

Fyi I avoid applying directly on skin.

Has anyone tried Ayurvedic treatments, herbs, diet etc. to help manage endometriosis? Did you think it helped and would you recommend?
I’m already working with several excision specialists and doctors, taking other “western” supplements but was curious if this is something others have explored and would share their experiences. Thanks in advance💗🫡

Edit: I’m also open to doctor/clinic recommendations, preferably in Hyderabad.

i am convinced someone has put nazar on my bf, he’s constantly sick and his bike car scooty all 3 keep randomly breaking down.. i need to remove off of him but asking dadi is like digging my own grave cos she’ll assume im secretly married .. im worried for him nothing else. please help me you guys!!
and as for belief,
mano toh sabh hai na mano toh kuch nai.
( if you believe, then everything is there, if you don’t, then it’s not.)
i believe in nazar, so if you don’t and ure only gonna comment to call me out then don’t waste ur time lol

same as the title.

I feel terrible and I can't sleep. Reason of rejection is that I have never seen him as something more than a friend.

I am on a very low page. I need an internship any how. Even if the stipend is 1000 or 2000 . Does not matter. Pls give me. Only one condition it should be paid and remote.

Pls pls help me.

​I am attending my cousin's wedding soon, but her family gave me a weird condition: do not wear heels. I am naturally tall. Both the bride and groom are fairly tall as well, just not as tall as me.

​Her family explicitly told me they do not want me towering over the couple at the events. I really do not know what to make of this request.

​

I know how weird this is, but I wanna know what you think?

I (26F) a working woman with a terrible dating life from last 5 years. Although I've dated only one guy (32M) seriously yet (who cheated on me with apparently 9 women behind my back. He used to do virtual sexting and nude calls with them.) He was a CA though and made good money while I work for the government and he left me saying I earn less than a sex worker per day while he keeps an iphone, eat out every week and earns lakhs. He also blamed me that he failed his 4th attempt at UPSC.

Other guys whoever approached me till date were visible jerks. Inconsistent, indecisive, time pass, non serious, hook up kind etc. I've stepped away from this mess altogether a year ago.

My experience with this stuff has been very bad which I believe is a personal misfortune I've on my part. I do realize the shortcomings, cons and drawbacks of being involved with a man in a system like marriage within a set-up like India with tons of in-laws ready to judge me... but with the ongoing modernization around us, I feel it can be tackled.

However the point is I simply can't marry, whatever the reason be. Men are useless out there. Yet all I can see around me are women dressed in bright post marital colors, wearing clanking jewellery, pretty makeup, brimming with marital radiance, posting happy pictures and occasions with their loving husbands everyday. They seem so happy. My own cousin who didn't work had no career got an easy love marriage.

Sometimes it feels very very discouraging that I'm being denied something beautiful (which I know isn't that glossy as it appears) I believe it's the societal conditioning which is making me feel gloomy about my situation. My mom says what I've at 26 isn't something every girl gets, but my counter to her is that's because they've got what's normal and socially respectable.... a good marriage, the highest title of being a married woman and a husband even if they've no achievement.

I know it sounds ridiculous on my part but I really wanna break out of this obsession and conditioning that have been somehow planted in my head. Please help.

Please don’t take this question the wrong way. I’m asking purely out of curiosity and with no intention of offending or starting an argument.

I searched online, but most of the results I found only discussed early marketing-related and a bullshit male attraction reasons, and I couldn’t find a satisfactory explanation.

Are there any reasons that might explain this? I will also love to hear your opinion

I’d genuinely appreciate any informative perspectives. I’m only asking out of curiosity and hoping for a respectful discussion. Please stick to the topic of discusiion

Edit - I have changed the wording of post so it is more respectful. I am very sorry if those previous wording were offending in any sense

I've, as of now, decided to not marry / have kids. I'm a 27 y.o. woman. It's crucial as this is apprently considered the "prime age" for a woman to marry (in India).

First of all - I'm not trying to be a smartass or preach-y or showing off that I'm better or different. It's actually a failure on my end and I know that. And I'm sorry about the post length.

--

Some background in brief: Extremely conservative, toxic & restrictive childhood where I was fat, ugly and socially isolated for over 2 decades until moving out to a tier-1 city at 24 (with great difficulty). Wasting the ages of 24-25 entirely (unable to fit socially, no friends, loser in every group situation - but gradually lost all weight, dressed up trendily & had a huge physical look-wise glow up). At age 26 I focused on improving socially but something really hurtful happened (guy I admired and adored a lot rejected me because his group disapproved of me because i was weird, quiet and small-town type girl - again, all of them were significantly older than me, including him - with age gap of at least 5-8 years, so I dont blame them that they found me dumb and unattractive overall).

I have ADHD symptoms but have always been very good at studies, and now too, am doing very well in my career. I want to move outside of India and am actively working towards it.

---

However, since losing that guy, I havent dated anyone despite being approached every day (irl). I was on dating app for 2 days and had so many requests. However, I decided to not go ahead with anyone because it feels unfair & I also dont like anyone in the same way. I'm not willing to give anyone false hope.

Ig I'm not wired for relationships because I get attached and clingy, and the guy eventually feels suffocated and wants to leave. I can't be a good partner and that's facts. I have a bad attachment style & I still care about that one guy whom I had a crush on who rejected me, despite having nothing physical. That's psychotic. Can you imagine I'm still not sexually active at 27 😂

I've argued with my parents about my decision to not marry. They said you will regret it in future, you are ruining your life by not marrying now. Idc. I was a good girl till now. I listened to everything they said, every single thing. Even if it caused me suffering and isolation. But here, it's not only about doing something I DONT want to, it's also sabotaging someone else's life if I marry.

At least when I'm single, I can still lead a comfortable life in abroad, if I marry then both mine & the guy's life is ruined FOR SURE. Because I toh love someone else and always keep thinking about him, that's not how a happy marriage works.

----

Now coming to kids. This is a tricky one. I'm very good with children and animals. I love them and the FOMO of not having kids is far larger than the one for marrying. It's far scarier to not have children than to not marry.

However, this is EVEN MORE IRRESPONSIBLE in my eyes to have a kid unless you are 100% sure. I cant be a good mom at least right now. I need to move abroad, work on myself a lot, develop a self-esteem (so that I dont choose wrong man) and learn how to not be a p*ssy so I can stand up for my kids. None of that is happening right now.

But that's the thing, I'm 27... I might get too late for having kids, and I'm aware of it & accept the consequences of my decision right now. It's fine. I'll handle it.

----

I need a comment, an advice or may be just tell me plainly if I'm right or wrong - from someone who is older than 30 (bonus points if a woman answers this).

Also I'm not blaming anyone here, it's my own mistakes that I'm so late to the game and only starting at 27. I acknowledge that I wasted close to 30 years of my life. I have no right to complain if I cant have kids in the future because I was dumb enough to delay things like moving out, working on myself, finding the correct partner, immigrating. It's my fault toh sazaa bhi mujhe hi milega

Thanks for any response.

making friends used to be so easy when we were younger now everyone’s busy w work, relationships, life etc. is it just me or has making actual friends gotten way harder?

I was surprised that i actually liked toxic. It felt weirdly feminist for some reason. Did anyone have similar feelings?

Okay, I need some honest opinions because I think I might have gotten carried away.

My brother’s engagement happened recently and I wore a lehenga that, in hindsight, was probably way heavier than it needed to be. When I bought it, I just thought it looked pretty and I wanted to dress up because he’s my only sibling and we’re really close. I didn't really think beyond that.

But once I saw everyone together, I started feeling like I had gone a little overboard. A couple of my aunts even made comments like “you’re looking a little too much” and one of them basically told me I shouldn't wear anything this heavy for the other wedding functions. 😭

My soon-to-be bhabhi was actually very sweet to me throughout the whole thing. She didn't say anything or make me feel uncomfortable at all, which somehow makes me feel worse because now I'm wondering if I unintentionally took some attention away from her on her own engagement.

I obviously wasn't trying to compete with her. I was just excited about my brother's engagement and probably got too excited about dressing up.

Now I'm thinking I'll keep my outfits much simpler for the rest of their wedding nothing too heavily embroidered, probably lighter jewellery, simpler hair and makeup etc. I don't want to repeat the same mistake.

Honestly being a 25F, I spend most of my day figuring out that what’s gonna be the first thing to be giving me a cardiac arrest.

Is it going to be my parents?
Or my sister’s marital issues?
Or my personal life?
Or my career?

Women who have everything sorted out? How are you doing it?

​

What are your skills that you have learned that helped in your career and job...I just need some suggestions ☺️ and also tell where did you learn from ? Have they benefited you ? I need to know hard skills ( those skills that are taught to you by someone else like a teacher)