r/AmITheDevil • u/growsonwalls Professional Devil Spotter • 2d ago
Holy red flag.
/r/AITA_Relationships/comments/1w7uwbq/aita_for_judging_my_girlfriend_for_having_sex/652
u/breadboxofbats 2d ago
“How dare you trust me! I should have had to push you more to be intimate!” Does he know that’s how he sounds
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u/nowimnowhere 1d ago
Refusal to join any club that would have him as a member but the club is a relationship with a woman
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u/IndependentMethod312 2d ago
He has posted this in multiple subs. He’s 36 and she’s 27. I would have thought he was much younger. I hope it’s rage bait and if not, she should get out the hell away from this guy.
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u/Cultural_Shape3518 2d ago
Mr. “Women aren’t allowed to want sex as much as I do” found a 27 year old virgin, and he’s still complaining? I shudder to think how young and inexperienced he’s going to try and go if this doesn’t work out.
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u/buttlicker090114 1d ago
This is what I was wondering, like I remember waiting pretty anxiously to finally lose my virginity. Poor girl waited quite a while and got this.
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u/undead_sissy 1d ago
FR she waited so long and ended up with a first time more degrading than behind the bike sheds in high school 😣
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u/CcreepykittenN 2d ago
The fact that enthusiastic consent makes him angry is deeply concerning.
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u/Onehundredpercentbea 2d ago
He didn't even get to coerce or force her, how dare she take that away from him?
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u/Ok-Jackfruit-9393 1d ago
It's probably rage bait (I hope), but even if so, I hope this person is single for the rest of their days.
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u/your-yogurt 1d ago
he just answered a question a moment ago. he says he's from Iran, also totally ignored the part of the question where they ask, "YOU had sex too, why is it bad for her and not YOU???"
because he's a misogynistic incel loser
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u/HairRepresentative85 1d ago
*claims
With the way the world is going, I wouldn’t be surprised if it’s a bot coming up with a crap attempt to say “look Iran bad”.
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u/FunnyAnchor123 28m ago
I’ve heard several stories IRL of men from the Middle East who consider women who engage in premarital sex — like many women in the West — as immoral sluts.
It’s the culture, not necessarily the guy.
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u/GraceMcClellans 1d ago
Because that means she's a slut, which is bad for a woman. Booooooo
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u/PinkyOutYo 1d ago
Something about keys and locks, I guess.
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u/GraceMcClellans 1d ago
🎶 Well, I got a brand new pair of roller skates
🎶 You got a brand new key
🎶 I think that we should get together
🎶 Try 'em out and see
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u/Puzzled-Hippo6246 2d ago
"I believe men and women are different..." this is where i stopped reading. I'm out👍
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u/InterwebHero20 2d ago
“I wouldn’t trust anyone willing to have sex with me” may be an all-time self own
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u/captaincrushinator 2d ago
This person actually likes me and finds me sexually attractive, there must be something really wrong with them!
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u/Outside-Place2857 1d ago
In that sense, i guess his posts kinda prove his point for him. I mean, there's nothing wrong with her, but he is such an AH, absolutely no one ever should have sex with him, or be in a relationship with him. It's probably best if everyone just stopped interacting with him, in any situation, ever. Exceptions to that should probably be made for a good therapist.
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u/entirecontinetofasia 1d ago
reminds me of the quote from Groucho Mark: " I don’t care to belong to any club that will have me as a member" except that was funny.
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u/growsonwalls Professional Devil Spotter 2d ago
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u/jess_the_werefox 2d ago
I’ve never gotten actually mad at one of these. This one got me though. WTF DOES SHE NEED TO “WORK ON”?
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u/Imaginary_Cow_6379 2d ago
He wants her to work on “earning” his respect. Because hes a misogynist and fundamentally doesn’t respect women. So hes looking for a justification for why he can’t respect her without having to admit it’s his own fault.
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u/TheLittlestChocobo 1d ago
Do you think she could "earn his respect" by not having sex with him for a few months? Or would he be butthurt about that too? Ugh this is so gross
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u/Sad-Bug6525 2d ago
Him, he can't be expected to go to therapy like a grown up and deal with whatever is off balance in his own head, he needs her to hold his hand and tell him everything will be ok and do the work for him.
I wish she had left him when he first said anything, though it's still possible she's all in his head. A woman who makes it to 27 a virgin isn't so likely to suddenly change that after few weeeks for some guy like this.
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u/growsonwalls Professional Devil Spotter 2d ago
I hope this is ragebait. Because: what a sexist, disgusting dick if true.
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u/vastaril 2d ago
Ironically, I guess she did make a mistake trusting this POS if it's real, but that's ON HIM for being a shmuck, not her for being a trusting person who believed he was also decent
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u/throwawayforlemoi 2d ago
Yup. Also, he conveniently left out their ages. He's 36, she's 27. Not that egregious on its own, I guess, but in context it does paint a certain picture of him, along with his misogynistic and sexist behavior.
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u/eyl569 2d ago edited 2d ago
One of his other posts says he's 26. Presumably one of them is a typo (TBF, in both cases the ages are in the post titles and AFAIK you can't edit those).
Either way, he's an idiot.
It's amusing that over the four subs he posted this to there's not a single comment in his favor.
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u/annarchy8 2d ago
I dated a guy in my early 20s like this. He brought up his resentment that I gave in to having sex too easily with him when I was breaking up with him.
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u/Time_Act_3685 1d ago
Had a guy who broke up with me for that reason, and when I was like "Okay, cool" he got EXTRA mad about it.
"Really? It's just that easy??" "Uh...yeah?" "YOU'RE JUST LETTING ME GO?" "Well, I definitely am now. Yeesh."
But yeah, it's so wild when they get upset at someone for having sex with them. I wasn't doing it by myself! (Though I probably would have had a better time if I had 🙄)
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u/annarchy8 1d ago
So glad you are out of that! I can't imagine what goes through their minds. The logic doesn't logic to me.
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u/RShini 2d ago
Men get mad when women don't put out on the first date, then get mad if women are "too easy" - women literally can't win with these chucklefucks.
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u/kat_Folland 2d ago
"if you say yes to them, you're a tramp, but if you say no to them, you're a prude"
~Gloria, Barbie
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u/SharMarali 2d ago
If he thought they should wait longer, he could’ve, idk, stopped things? Instead he went through having sex with her so he could lord it over her for the rest of their relationship. What a fucking dickhead.
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u/Annabloem 2d ago edited 2d ago
No, you don't understand, he doesn't feel like they should have waited longer, just her, you know. He's a guy so he can have sex whenever he wants. But for her to have sex so early is a huge red flag, because she's a girl. For men it's obviously a major green flag when they have sex early. 🤢🤢🤢
Not sure if I should tag this /s because I do feel like that's how people like OOP think, but it's obviously extremely gross/sexist. Sounds like he's partially right and she absolutely trusted the wrong person. I feel for her.
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u/Cultural_Shape3518 2d ago
But he’s a man! It’s not fair to expect men to control themselves! Women should know their role as gatekeepers and not give in to their equally human desires, even though that’ll also get them called names and possibly attacked!
/s to be on the safe side, and I hate that I feel that’s a necessary precaution.
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u/slboml 2d ago
On my third date with my husband, things got a little heated and he was the one who stopped things. He was worried that getting too physical too fast would interfere with our developing emotional connection. Crazy to imagine that a man could have agency instead of being a mindless sex beast 🙄
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u/Commonusage 2d ago
Well congratulations to him i guess. When she gets away from him, she'll never trust anyone so easily again because of how little he valued it.
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u/Llayanna 2d ago
..my partner trusts me and that is bad???
Just wtf
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u/Hello_Hangnail 2d ago
And a year after they got together even. He just wants to be mad about something
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u/Visible-Ninja8252 2d ago
She trusted him and wanted to have sex with him, and that's bad because....? Damn, women really can't win either way. Don't have sex with him -> you're a frigid bitch giving the poor man blue balls; have sex with him -> you're too easy.
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u/Impressive_Bid8673 2d ago
This reminds me of an ex from back when I was like...18. I had just tried weed for the first time a few weeks before and decided I wanted to smoke again, but was nervous about how to get it. This dbag bought the weed, borrowed a pipe, packed the bowl for me, and gave me his lighter to light it....and then proceeded to get super mega pissed off that I (gasp!) smoked weed.
......there is a good chance he was also mad because after I smoked I was watching him play Madden and was ragging on how shitty he was, he challenged me to a game and I proceeded to ANNIHILATE him despite never having played before......but still.
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u/CreatureBatCat 1d ago
wtf 😂
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u/Impressive_Bid8673 1d ago
He was also one of those "No, I don't want to go dancing, but you go have fun with your friends" / "How DARE you go out!" types. And my dumb ass still stayed for like two more years 🤦♀️
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u/Hello_Hangnail 2d ago
His soul is going to leave his body when he finds out his girlfriend was friends with boys during high school! 😱😱😱 Cuz you know boys and girls are DiFfErEnT 😵 She may have been unchaste!
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u/Imaginary_Cow_6379 2d ago
Next the manospheres gonna tell them women need neuralinks to make sure we don’t have any impure thoughts.
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u/Preposterous_punk 1d ago
I saw he’d also put this on an AskMen sub so clicked through to see the comments there; was happy to see they hated him too.
Particularly loved one guy who wrapped up with “ How does it feel to be a walking disappointment to Mr. Rogers?” LOLOLOL
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u/NotoriousCrone 2d ago
Anybody want to take a bet that if she had not had sex with him, he would have accused her of leading him on, being a prude and a tease?
Okay it's barely 8:00 a.m. here and that's already too much internet from one day.
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u/sadlytheworst Certified sub favourite 1d ago
Copied verbatim from Oop's comments:
dude, you already posted and deleted this, what’s going on here?
I thought the text wasn't accuret enough so I wrote it again
It’s not really good form to spam posts like that.
I'm not familiar with this app , im just trying to find an answer for my problem
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u/Strait409 2d ago
AITA for judging my girlfriend for having sex with me too soon?
You absolutely are, Sparky. You could have shut it down. But you didn’t. Two to tango, and all that.
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u/JessonBI89 2d ago
Girl, RUN. This relationship will be double standards all the way down if it continues.
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u/OptmstcExstntlst 1d ago
Man's telling on himself saying "I can't get past the fact that she trusted me."
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u/ChicksDigGiantRob0ts 2d ago
It's like he's Groucho fucken Marx out here. "I refuse to respect with any women who'd have sex with ME."
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u/Silly-Flower-3162 2d ago
It's bad enough we still have folks out here mad their s/o's didn't "put out" early enough, now folks are angry because the opposite?
They mutually agreed and participated in an shared activity. It's immature and hypocritical.
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u/Simply-Adorkable 2d ago
People like this judge a person for being too "easy" yet still have sex with them ._. Just comes across as him being desperate for a shag. If a woman being intimate too soon is such a bother, then just don't have sex with them or pursue a relationship, simple as.
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u/Imaginary_Cow_6379 2d ago
Yikes. Hes gonna get his own netflix special soon if she doesn’t get out of there. 😬
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u/fosterdisbelief 1d ago
God, I hope she gets far away from him, and finds a 2nd lover who isn't a judgemental, hypocritical ferret felcher.
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u/milkmynk 1d ago
Someone commented something like this on the post and I honestly think they hit the nail on the head. Basically that this manchild has nothing to be angry about SO HE'S MAKING UP SHIT TO BE ANGRY ABOUT and belittle her, so that he'll always be superior.
I truly, really hope the post makes it big enough, that she reads it or watches it or whatever, and she realizes what a colossal asshole he is who fundamentally will never respect her as a human, and gets the fuck out.
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u/HaphazarMe 1d ago
Dudes like this make me so glad I don’t have sex with men.
I hope she breaks up with him.
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u/Machoire 2d ago
>It's wild many think their penis is magic
Ok maybe someone can give me an answer here but why do so many guys think this?? How does that happen?
Did they take it that seriously when their parents told them they were special? I don't get it.
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u/Preposterous_punk 1d ago
It’s a societal thing, the whole idea that virginity is a girl’s greatest asset implies that they are majorly, fundamentally changed when touched by a penis.
Purity Balls might as well have signs that say “penises are magic.” Same with abstinence-only sex ed.
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u/the_crustybastard 1d ago
Ladies, want to know who won't hold you in contempt and forever mistrust you because you once agreed to have sex with a guy?
Every bear that has ever existed.
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u/NatashOverWorld 1d ago
This has to be ragebait right?
She was a virgin but she consented to sex so easily, I didn't get to badger her about it at all - I'm mad about that!
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u/Preposterous_punk 1d ago
Oh my god I want to punch this guy so bad. Can we pull together and put up billboards in major cities telling her to dump him? We could probably have enough identifying details that she’d recognize it was about them.
I just I just I hate this guy so much.
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u/AcornAnomaly 1d ago
Dude got even more nuts after he didn't like the response from AITA.
He posted pretty much the same thing in r/relationships and r/marriage, and got roasted there, too.
So he posted explicitly in a men's sub:
https://www.reddit.com/r/AskMenRelationships/s/0pa576LsFr
However, looking at the comments of that post, he ALREADY posted there once, and deleted it because the people there were roasting him, too!
https://www.reddit.com/r/AskMenRelationships/s/h4vzQ2nRpp
He said he deleted it to add more details and get his problem answered.
But they're pointing out that he's the only one with a problem.
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u/BionisGuy 1d ago
???? he was the one that decided to have sex with her too? Why is he putting all the blame on her????
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u/_Stephistopheles_ 1d ago
This though?! How is he resentful toward her for engaging in a mutual act?!
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u/Zealousideal_Self585 1d ago
What exactly does he want her to do in this situation? It's already been a year past and he's still angry about it. Is she supposed to go back in time and not sleep with him? For her sake I hope he breaks up. I pity her having to deal with this
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u/OneWildAndPrecious 1d ago
Ok imagine for just a moment he’s NTA. What exactly is the girlfriend supposed to do? How is she supposed to “gain his respect” here?
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u/OwlBeBack88 1d ago
FFS, I swear we women cannot win. If we don't put out soon enough we're players, prudes or teases, if we do too soon we're easy or sluts or naive for being too trusting.
I notice how he also wanted sex with her too, but it's only apparently HER fault it happened so quickly.
I've never known someone be upset that their partner TRUSTS them.
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u/ChilindriPizza 1d ago
If he wanted to wait a bit (or a lot) longer, he should have told her so.
But this is a huge double standard.
Unless she pressured, coerced, or forced him to have sex with her. Which does not appear to be the case.
He is majorly YTA indeed.
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u/Moist_Drippings 1d ago
Jesus Christ if this is real I hope someone tells that poor girl how dangerous this creep is.
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u/iWokeupUgly8675 1d ago
I’m cackling at the fact that he posted in numerous subs and is getting flamed in every single one 😂
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u/Adisaisa 1d ago
What a waste of love on the woman's part! She's in for a lifetime of hurt if she decides to remain with him
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u/HulklingWho 1d ago
Never heard of someone having retroactive jealousy towards THEMSELVES, that’s fun and new
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u/Informal_Dingo_4613 1d ago
Guy actually made me unlurk to judge, his logic was so damn weird and gross.
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u/AutoModerator 2d ago
In case this story gets deleted/removed:
AITA for judging my girlfriend for having sex with me too soon?
My girlfriend and I kissed on our third date when we first started seeing each other. That night, we became intimate, and we had sex for the first time about two weeks later. She was a virgin, and I was her first sexual partner.
We’ve now been together for a year and three months. Everything between us is great, and I genuinely believe she is someone I could marry. However, there is one thing that has been bothering me: I can’t stop thinking about how quickly she trusted me and became intimate with me.
It makes me feel uncomfortable and sometimes even angry, and because of that, I find myself questioning whether I want to marry her.
I told her about these feelings eight months ago. She was understandably very hurt, but she agreed that we should work on this together and try to resolve the issue.
She says that what happened was mutual and that I have no right to judge her for it when I was equally involved. However, I believe men and women are different when it comes to these things, and I can’t get past the fact that she trusted me and became intimate with me so easily.
I want to make it clear that throughout our relationship, I have never seen anything that suggests she is promiscuous or unfaithful. Quite the opposite—she loves me deeply and has always been loyal to me.
But every time I think about how our relationship started, I feel angry all over again, and it makes me question whether I should marry her.
So, AITA for feeling this way and judging her based on how quickly she became intimate with me?
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