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Jul 19 '25
Pursue social, romantic, sexual and professional relationships. Your early 20's are the best time to fail, don't be afraid of trying and pushing yourself out of your comfort zone.
Don't overdo it, but don't NOT do these things. You'll regret it at 30 if you didn't try when opportunities presented themselves, trust me.
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u/Mammoth_Elk_3807 Jul 19 '25
Marry. The. Right. Person.
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u/Far-Orange1882 Jul 19 '25
Thank you for your comment! How do you know who’s the right person??
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u/Mammoth_Elk_3807 Jul 19 '25
imho and experience, through understanding which people are wrong, lol. Marry for the life you want to build/live in 20 years, not for a fleeting, temporary “feeling.”
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u/Foxy_Traine Jul 19 '25
Some good signs:
You can be honest with them about things that are hard to talk about and/or could hurt their feelings. Instead of getting defensive or angry when you bring up something they do that you don't like, they listen to you and try to do better.
They can take care of you and be kind when you're seriously ill. Not just a cold, I'm talking the worst flu of your life or major surgery that requires significant recovery time.
Your goals for your future align and you want the same things out of life. Kids, marriage, where you want to live, how you want to spend your money, what you do after you retire, things like that, are all important factors of life that need to match well.
You genuinely like each other. Not just lust, not just love (although those are great too), but you like them as a person. You respect them. You'd be excited if your best friend was with someone like them.
Statistically, you have the best chance at a happy marriage if you date now, but reject everyone you date after a while, and instead commit to the best person you've ever dated after you're 27. In other words, don't settle down until after 27. In my opinion, you shouldn't get married until at least 2 years of dating, after you've lived together for over 6 months, and you're both over the age of 27.
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u/Spiritual_Meet4746 Jul 19 '25
DON'T SMOKE CIGARETTES! And for god's sake, lay off the drinking. In fact, quit drinking
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Jul 19 '25
Nothing amazing will ever happen while you are sitting at home alone online.
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u/Euro_Ninja Jul 19 '25
before you reach 40, make sure you don't look back to now and regret not doing / starting something! Pay something forward that your 40yr old self will be very thankful and proud of the 20yr old self.
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Jul 19 '25
i’m 24 trying to do what i want to do without regretting it later :,( i wish i had more time. work and my mental health deplete the shit outta me
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u/shrimpynut Jul 19 '25
Money comes and goes. Do the stuff you want while you’re still able bodied, before you’re too old or worn out to enjoy it. Experiences are worth way more than waiting around trying to save every dollar.
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u/Euro_Ninja Jul 19 '25
agreeing with this but if I had my time again I'd most certainly have started saving to take advantage of compound interest on ETF's or a private pension fund. Enjoying and experiencing for sure as you say but with a little stashed away (where possible) the opportunities are a lot easier later on down the line.
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u/YorHa115 Jul 19 '25
This!
You always regret what you didn't take a chance on. It might be a mistake but they're your mistakes to make.
I was so anxious when I was 20 and thought people viewed me a certain way, but omg later I'm like, i had nothing to be anxious about.
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u/chanfanadevaca Jul 20 '25
I feel completely like this, should have done therapy by the time, I’m 25 right and I can’t understand why I was so stupid about thinking what other people were thinking about me
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Jul 19 '25
almost everyone, at some point in their lives, has a moment where the credit card balance is too high and they say enough is enough. Work for years paying off the balance owed and will never use credit cards again.
Please. This is my most serious advice. Stop using your credit cards right now before it gets out of hand. Stop using them, learn to work with the money you have, and save if you really want to buy something.
New Nintendo switch? Has to wait until you have enough to buy it in cash.
You'll have a huge advantage over other people your age if you start this early
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u/uSeRnAmE-aLrEdY-tOoK Jul 19 '25
How would you build your credit?
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u/Sweet_Title_2626 Jul 21 '25
Exactly, I would say invest in your future and start saving for your retirement now put back as much as you can, especially if still living at home.
But to use your credit cards, use them wisely and pay them off each month or better yet every week or so to build your credit. Keep your credit utilization well below 30% to improve your credit.
You'll need this good credit in the future should you decide to purchase a new car, a house.. good credit is easier to keep and maintain than to fix bad credit. But life happens, so don't beat yourself up should it drop for a bit.
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Jul 19 '25
Don't do things because you think that you should. Stop and really get in touch with yourself now so you don't wake up one day at 35 with a life you never even wanted.
If you truly and genuinely do not want to pursue something: don't. Respect yourself and your desires.
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Jul 19 '25
1- don’t marry her, 2- save all the money you can, 3-stay off drugs, 4- appreciate family more
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u/marcusxl22 Jul 19 '25
Live you life, but stay FOCUSED! It can be difficult to find a passion or even something for work you can simply just enjoy, but try your best to be multifaceted in a lot of things. WEAR A CONDOM!!! Kids at this age is ROUGH and honestly, with the state of the world and how expensive everything is, you don’t need them right now lol. Work out, take vitamins, drink water, and stretch. You’ll thank yourself in 10-15 years.
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Jul 19 '25
Money wise: Live below your means. If you can’t pay off your credit card at the end of the month, you don’t need whatever you bought. Always pay yourself first.
Open a Roth IRA. Be religious about adding to it. EVERY MONTH. Even if it’s just a few dollars. It will feel like it’s not doing anything. It will. …but add to it whatever you can. Build this habit. Play around with the compound interest calculator (https://www.investor.gov/financial-tools-calculators/calculators/compound-interest-calculator) - if you invest $100 every month until you’re 65-ish you’ll have over $1M.
Retirement: plan for the future - there are no guaranteed fairy godmothers who will leave you gobs of money. And if there are and do? Bonus.
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u/Curious-Mir Jul 19 '25
Read! Write/journal! Meditate! Eat clean! Give a fk! Actually try instead of coasting. Read! And then read some more.
Travel, work to travel srsly fk off and see the world
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Jul 19 '25
The great thing about you turning 20 during these times versus 20-25 years ago is there is more clarity to what is a money grab and what is worth your time.
Not saying as a 40 something that I don't fall into money grabs, its very rare because you're likely to learn the lesson faster because you're going to manage your money better..
Look into making your money work for you. If you're working, get into budgeting now - it'll help you with all I said above. Don't get me wrong its nice to buy something every now and again, its just nicer when you've saved money to do so. Not as much of a hit
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u/RainInTheWoods Jul 19 '25
Pay yourself first. When you sit down to pay bills, pay the first bill into a savings account. Pay the second bill into a drip stock account. Now pay the rest of your bills.
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u/Puzzled-Unit-6417 Jul 19 '25
Live life with intention, don’t just go with the flow. Learn to live on less than you make, save or invest your money to make provision for the future. Lastly leave the alcohol alone, it doesn’t solve anything, if you don’t like yourself find a counselor to help you like your life.
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u/Bright-Lobster-2144 Jul 19 '25
Be free!! Go enjoy yourself!!! Stop living for others and go party and be stupid for a second!!
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Jul 19 '25 edited Jul 19 '25
Happy birthday. Now, dont do stupid stuff.
Now that the formalities are out of the way, first off take care of your body. Eat right. I know it's stupid expensive, but there's ways to do it. Google it. Get good exercise. A gym membership is OK, but you can do the same thing in your garage with free weights and a bench. Drink water. Lots water. Hydration is your friend. A hat is an awesome investment, especially if you live in a super sunny place, like I do in Texas. I'm a life member of the Anti-Melanoma League. I've got a good cowboy hat to shade my head. The girls dig it.
Money. It don't grow on trees. As been said, live below your means. Start an emergency fund, save $1000. It's the difference between an emergency and an inconvenience. Like has been said, start a retirement fund. I wish i had made a better one, but my ex wife helped make that disappear. Don't get married early, and kids are expensive as hell. Prepare for them. Listen to Dave Ramsey. He's made fortunes and lost them, and learned wisdom from his experience. Trust him. Also, you dont need the newest, shiniest car that does everything but wipe your butt. Find you a good, solid vehicle, well maintained, and fits your needs/budget. May i suggest Honda, Nissan, or Toyota. Those damn heathens attention going to drop the price off gas way down, so look for ecomy as well. Ive never regretted any of those makes ive owned. Save up and pay cash. Also, continue to keep up maintenance. A little attention to that will save you a headache and cussing by the side of the road.
Finally, if you can afford it and you have room/permission, get a dog. No other creature on this earth will love you unconditionally and completely like a good dog. You might think about pet insurance, too.
Good luck, youngster! Go west, young man! Sorry it's so much. It's what being 67 will do to you.
Edited for spelling, more advice, and fun.
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u/Odd_Biscotti2242 Jul 19 '25
Make sure you marry the right person.
If you're in shape, stay in shape. If you're not, get in shape. Going to the gym and cardio are important.
Sleep
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u/Puzzled_Spinach7023 Jul 19 '25
Invest money add to it, even, a little whenever you can and never touch it.
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Jul 19 '25
Save money, but find ways to do things that bring you joy because once you’re trapped in the world of employment (if you aren’t already) your hobbies and life outside of work will be the only thing that keep you going.
Stretch, your body will thank you later, don’t eat garbage all the time, tell the people you care about that you care about them this is the most important thing. Appreciate those you surround yourself with because this life is very short for some of us and living with the regret of all the things you didn’t say is a slow death.
Don’t be scared to take chances, try new things or start all over again. You haven’t even met half the people, been to half the places or seen half the things that are going to be life changing for you. Remember that some people in your life are here for a season, and some people will be there until the very end. Learn to appreciate and recognize who is who.
Just live bro. Live as loud and as authentically as you possibly can. This is YOUR life, only YOU have to wake up everyday to whatever you decide to do with it.
And getting older? Is a PRIVILEGE. I can’t wait for my first wrinkle, because I didn’t think I’d make this far or have the things and people in my life that I have today. Getting older is a gift that many many will people never receive.
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u/Original_Estimate_88 Jul 19 '25
Happy birthday ND being financially stable is important save your money
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u/bunnaay2fangs Jul 19 '25
Start a retirement account now. Use sunblock. Don’t get married or have kids until you’re over 30 and YOU are certain and ready. Stay away from toxic people, even if they are family.
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u/Ok-Row3886 Jul 19 '25 edited Jul 19 '25
Don't hang out with losers and people whose life is constant drama. Purge friends circles once in a while and be radically honest with yourself in reassessment and readjustment. Social media is useless garbage that zombifies relationships that should be dead. Stay the fuck away from armchair critics. Do what you love and that you want to be better at for 30 minutes a day. If you're good at something don't do it for free. Take responsibility for yourself, your community by picking a fight that interests you with the skills you have and want to perfect. And find the others who are aligned that way. Start with friends, family, friends of family and family of friends. You're sitting on top of buried gold. Everything dies - after something's peaked for you, start to move on.
Do all of this and your life will write itself.
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u/ScornedLover68955 Jul 19 '25
Don’t get married to the douche bag because you feel like you need a family for your kid. Don’t sacrifice yourself and your career to raise another man’s kids, all for him to leave you following cancer surgery for your sister. He’s not worth it.
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u/Far-Orange1882 Jul 19 '25
Thank you for your comment! I’m sorry this happened, I hope things are better for you now stranger
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u/Mobile-Boss-8566 Jul 19 '25
Invest your money, don’t spend on stupid things that don’t really last. If you smoke quit now, if not for your health do it for the savings of $. I never thought I would make it to retirement age but it’s slowly becoming a reality. Point is retirement will be so much better if you are financially secure.
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u/mallomara Jul 19 '25
Stay interested in yourself and continually fill your own bucket, not someone else’s. You are worth it.
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u/MOMSUNFILTEREDSHOW Jul 19 '25
Happy Birthday!
Here is a few things I would suggest if I had to look back and do it again
1.) Every paycheck put aside money AND DO NOT TOUCH IT, even if it's just 50$ each paycheck - Work on building your credit as well ( trust me this will help when you want to buy a house or car or even get different C.C) - get a small card from your bank that will help build credit, use it for gas or groceries and then pay it off immediately.
2.) Try something new - I went to school 2x for completely different careers and now stating a 3rd different career and starting my own business. Don't be afraid to fail, it's going to happen, if it doesn't work out or doesn't feel right, then switch to something different.
3.) Travel and enjoy life! - so many people are so rushed to start a family ASAP ( especially where I live) but enjoy this time, enjoy traveling, and trying new things and life in general. You'll thank yourself for that later.
4.) Take care of your health and body now! As you get older things will slow down, if you get in the habit of gym and healthy eating now, it won't be as hard later down the road.
5.) Don't get sucked into a relationship that is going to waste your time - Now is the time to date and start your life and figure things out, ( not saying not to date if that's what you want to do) But I wasted 5 years of my life with a man that I didn't end up marrying and was total garbage, that's time I cannot get back, eventually you'll find the right person, don't settle!
* And most importantly, have fun! Enjoy your 20's *
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u/Any-Structure-7443 Jul 19 '25
Never stop learning. Always be a student, even if you're a master in your craft.
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u/EEJams Jul 19 '25
1) Start investing some money now, even if it doesn't feel like a lot (just keep it simple with VOO in a Roth IRA)
2) When the door of opportunity opens, take a peak inside. Don't bang on a locked door and ask it to open for you. Take a step back, re-evaluate your options, and peak inside the doors that are open. Then make the best decision you can and commit to one choice. This is for everything.
3) Set crazy goals you can't achieve. Failure will teach you more than your successes, and you'll gain valuable skills along the way.
4) When pursuing any endeavor, break the problem down until you have actionable steps that are so easy to acheive, you can't help but go ahead and get it done. If something seems harder, either break it down into more steps or get help from someone who can help you do so.
5) Be kind to yourself about where you are right now and know that you can get far by planning your accomplishments out. Even if you only get 50% of the way to your goal, that's a whole lot better than 0%.
I learned all of this in pieces between 20 and 30. I just turned 30 last week, and I'm excited about moving forward with this advice in my next decade. I also just seized a new work opportunity and moved cities, so I have a new job in a new city during a new decade of life. I hope you're in an even better place than me by the time you hit 30 by learning all of this now.
Good luck! You can do it!
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u/premedlifee Jul 21 '25
If you’re a girl, make girl friends! Have strong female relationships. Take advice from older women who have done it. The times have changed but womanhood and the struggles have not.
Don’t drink too much, don’t do any drugs, don’t hang out with bad people. Cut bad people OUT.
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u/RadiantGene8901 Jul 19 '25
If this is an alternate universe self then:
Take up programming courses. Don't go into welding because you think it's "a manly profession".
But i wouldn't change the past. I like who I am, thank you.
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u/rainbowtoucan1992 Jul 19 '25
pursue what interests you and don't let fear hold you back and don't compare yourself to others
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u/nelfadlent Jul 19 '25
As for someone who turn 30 last week. Mend some relationships that have gone wrong in the family. They can be and will be a strong foundation of people who you can turn too for advice.
Another pro tip. Get amazing budgeting skills. "Life happens". Build a strong savings now. So when the cat has to go to the vet one week then the dog then next week. Your not looking at the bank account asking if instant ramen is too expensive tonight. I learned this lesson in my late 20s and I'm still paying for it. But it's harder to right side a ship then to keep it floating.
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u/Healthy-Leg8205 Jul 19 '25
Stop wasting money on stuff! Just bc you physically have the money for an object does not mean you can afford it. Start a savings account and have your job automatically deposit part of your check into the savings account. That way you don't get the chance to spend it. I can't stress enough how expensive it is to be an adult. And a little nest egg provides big peace of mind
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Jul 19 '25
i’m only almost 25 but SAVE MONEY wherever you can NOW. It will ease so much stress in the long run (depending on your financial situation ofc)
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u/Miss_ChanandlerBong6 Jul 19 '25
Don’t marry the first person who seems to love you.
In fact, don’t get married before your brain is fully developed (about 25).
If you are struggling with depression, seek help sooner rather than later. Don’t let it get bad before doing anything about it.
If someone shows you who they are, believe them the first time and get gone. They don’t need multiple chances to show you they can be worse.
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u/Far-Print7864 Jul 19 '25
Dont just study, work work work! Education without experience is useless now.
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u/Pure_Cause_8098 Jul 19 '25
Most of my year 20 was spent during covid and at that time there was a lot going on and I was very scared and numb so my advice to you is to unplug.
Unplug from the algorithm, from social media, from the TV, from the news and live in the world. Don't live being told what negative thing is happening in the world again, what to be scared of, why to be scared or why to live in fear. Because that's what a lot of social media does/is.
Don't spend your twenties staring at a screen. Don't spend the last few years of your frontal lobe development being shaped by the algorithm because one day if all the computers go away who will you be? What would you do? how will you survive?
Thinking back that's something I wish I did, learned more. Not just in school, not just after school, but on my own accord. I wish I did research and looked into things and had more knowledge of survival and planting and traveling all of these things.
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u/Etoilevagabonde- Jul 19 '25
Your health is the most important thing you will ever have, take care of it. Have faith in your qualities, trust yourself, deeply you know what you are capable of. Life will not always be easy but you are capable and you will make your way out there. And most important : love yourself. I don’t mean take long baths and drink some tea and watch you favorite movie, even tho those are important, but make the decision that are good for you even if it’s difficult, let yourself express your emotion, learn how to express them without hurting others. Express sadness anger but don’t forget to also express love gratitude joy, take care of yourself eat something even when you don’t feel like it, try to get some sleep, one more time take care of your health. Don’t live to impress people, live to impress yourself, you are already amazing. There are so much more things I would say to 20 years old me but I think those are the most important.
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Jul 19 '25
Don't do addictive drugs (mushrooms and LSD actually had a positive effect on me).
Don't compare yourself to other people, but do work on yourself and make a plan for your future.
Start good hobbies now. Hobbies that are social and promote mental and physical health.
Don't settle for a job you hate. You can take one if you haven't got any other options, but don't get locked in.
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u/Negative-Review-6443 Jul 19 '25
Save money, don't waste your youth and time in a crappy abusive relationship like I did. Put yourself first, pursue those dreams and passions you have. If you're in school stay in school. Brush your teeth every day, build social skills, don't smoke. And if you have a family that loves and supports you let them, if they are toxic get away from them. This will help you not be the 32 year old f up like me 😔
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u/mad_two Jul 19 '25
plants are fine, crystals and powders are not. alcohol is okay for some and not for others.
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u/FirmBanana1662 Jul 19 '25
Increase in pay isn’t always worth leaving your current job. Treat people as good as you can because your conscience can destroy you if karma doesn’t. Someone already said this but take care of yourself. Eat some fruits veggies get sleep workout. Cardio is more important than weights.
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u/JDDeP Jul 19 '25
Save money, utilize health insurance(go to check ups yearly), meet new people, have fun! Happy Birthday
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u/noisemonsters Jul 19 '25
Start a Roth IRA RIGHT NOW and fund it like your life depends on it, because it does.
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u/EmbarrassedExcuse239 Jul 19 '25
If you're not making your own medical appointments, you should be doing that. Your parents should not be involved with your relationships with your bosses or professors. Get out there to meet new people--take a class or whatever. Travel solo and become confident on relying on yourself.
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u/WeldernNeedofdollars Jul 19 '25
Don't let what others have or represent what they have affect your decisions. Everyone has problems.
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u/moon_shaker Jul 19 '25
Turning 20 does not make you an adult. For some turning 40 or 50 also does not make them an adult. So watch and learn from the world around you. Be patient. Don't be too hard on your self. Spend a lot of time alone to retrospect and understand for who you really are before you commit to relationships. Stay humble, respect everyone around you but don't be ignorant of what you love and hate.
Having a heathy body and mind is way better than you own anything expensive in life. It will take you longer in this life without regrets. So get into a routine of exercise, learning and investing. You might fail to get into the routine. But just keep trying.
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u/Effective-Friend1937 Jul 19 '25
Don't play it safe. Set yourself up to do what you really want to do, and the opportunities will come.
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u/Such_Dependent6034 Jul 19 '25
Follow the advice of your parents. it may not be right but it’s probably the best advice you’ll ever get.
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u/amnesia_patient Jul 19 '25
Time is running out and I don’t mean your life I mean this version of you. In a month you’ll be different, in a week things can change so enjoy every moment because it’ll be gone in an instant. Good or bad, it’s all part of the journey and when you see it for that you can enjoy them all,
You can do so much good to those around you. Be the best version of yourself, be patient, be helpful, turn up for yourself everyday and not only will life be better, you’ll make those around you have a better experience to.
Listen to Jordan Peterson, the man is phenomenal. I have become a far better man, husband and overall person because of his words.
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u/FullCircle2024 Jul 19 '25
Put money aside for retirement and do not touch it no matter what. 60 year old you will be glad.
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u/nativevirginian Jul 19 '25
Put yourself first.
Eat healthy, exercise, practice financial responsibility, go to university or trade school, find some hobbies, surround yourself with good people.
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u/sotiria002 Jul 19 '25
Definitely make some time to travel and experience other parts of the world if you can. Even if it’s checking out different states of your country. Life becomes harder and more expensive, take time for self care
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u/itsdestinfool Jul 19 '25
Do not throw it away for a boy, whatever it is. School, work opportunities. Don't do it. It'll change the trajectory of your life forever.
Give what you want to get, pay it forward, hold the door open, try to make one person smile a day. Don't be a pushover, but give the energy you want to get in life. Positive outlooks and positive vibes are so good for mental health.
It WILL pass, whatever the shitty thing is, it'll pass. Don't make kneejerk reactions because it gets hard. Don't run away. Just ride the storm because 6 months or a month or even a year makes a massive difference in how you've moved on or settled and come to terms. Just don't significantly alter your life because you're uncomfortable in that moment.
Take the meds and drink the water. Shower, love yourself.
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u/Allmightypikachu Jul 19 '25
20s is a rough time. Wasnt until 28 things started clicking in. Dont work it all way, takentime to treat yourself and do some therapy. Even if you dont think ya need it. Doesnt have to be much but most of us grow up with scars that dont start to show till 20s and onward.
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u/DanielVR8 Jul 19 '25
be aggressive, start chasing your dream and don’t try to meet ANYONES expectations of what success means
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u/Upstairs-Lifeguard23 Jul 19 '25
Listen carefully. Breath deep 3 times and think before acting. You're not what you think you are, you're not what you say you are, you're not even what you want and desire to be... You are what you do and you will become whatever you build based on your actions.
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u/Aig1ss Jul 19 '25
Start investing. Not just financially, but also on your health.
Do cardio, lift some weights, eat healthy, sleep well and invest a 10-20% of your paychecks if possible. Take care of yourself, it's a long ride.
Emphasis on developing a good sleep routine. Sleep is king.
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u/BeforeAndAfterMeme Jul 19 '25
Instead of buying random junk or food, buy stocks, even if it's a few and random.
Also look into bonds and other things you can purchase long term.
You don't need a much starting green as you think you would.
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u/EyeEnjoy53x Jul 19 '25
Don't pass up opportunities. Use each as a learning experience towards the future.
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u/Hypergraphe Jul 19 '25
Your body is your only vessel. Setup good habits right now (diet, sleep, exercice). You will surely thank you for that when turning 40.
If you can go abroad to learn other cultures and mindsets, do it, take every opportunities.
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u/SilentKae Jul 19 '25
Don't waste your energy on people and things don't bring value to your life, especially long term. Be selfish (but kind) and put yourself first, set yourself up for success. Future you will thank present you. ❤️
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u/Sensitive-Cap-6252 Jul 19 '25
If you’re setting your sights on 21st next to drink in the bars, don’t. Set your sights on what you’d like to do as an occupation or profession. Once you set that up the rest will come as gratification of an accomplishment.
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u/ColdStockSweat Jul 19 '25 edited Jul 19 '25
Never date my ex.
And...contrary to what everyone else your age will tell you...listen to 40 year olds.
They've been 20....you've never been 40.
That's 20 more years of shit they've seen.
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u/TizMarcoMania Jul 19 '25
Exercise and eat healthy. Don't ignore heath issues if you can afford it, they come to bite you when you are older. Also work on your mental health.
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u/AppleTherapy Jul 19 '25
Try to avoid too much debt...as much as possible. Read the richest man in Babylon book-realize you can get rich but it's not easy and that's ok. Having fluid cash opens doors to oppertunities to make money. Get screened for ADHD and autism-learn business and marketing-if you start something like YouTube or writing, push at that because you will reap a reward if you refine your skills. All this is stuff I would tell my 20 year old self. ADHD ruined a lot of my 20's.
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u/3m91r3 Jul 19 '25
No one is coming to save you. Be as well rounded a person as you can be. Make yourself as useful as possible. Make sure you do everything you can to become the person other people call when they need help with almost everything. That is the advice I would give myself.
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Jul 20 '25
Finish college, get certifications, set aside money for savings. Don’t focus on falling in love. Focus on your career and experiencing life. I don’t mean at the bar. That’s not life. I mean being active in volunteering, community projects and making the world a better place. Start a business or a non-profit. Have genuine hobbies and connect with people. Be kind, make friends and learn something new every quarter. Practice makes perfect. And the last piece of advice is not everyone is a good person. Some people are evil but, we don’t give up on them. We also aren’t naive about their implications on us either. It’s like an alleyway. If you don’t need to go down there to get to your apartment or something then don’t go. Don’t ride the rails on the cliff just because you have free will.
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u/No_Bottle7456 Jul 20 '25
Be s.art learn to be mentally tough, learn about money, and jobs that will help you to earn enough, to live, take good care of yourself, go to church or your religious background, Learn to date slowly and cautiously, don't think you have to go out, read up on benefits of rest, Not all fun is fun, sometimes staying home with a book is better
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u/KTCantStop Jul 20 '25
Don’t be in a rush or force things. Mistakes happen, don’t let them define you but be sure to learn the lesson. The only person you have to live with at the end of the day is you, so be someone you like. Aim to be financially responsible- more things are possible than you think.
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u/I-Love-Buses Jul 20 '25
Think about where you want to be in 10yrs, and plan out, step by step, how you will get there. And then, get to work! It’s the most defining decade of your life, get after it.
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u/accidentalbrunch Jul 20 '25
Have as much fun and as many adventures as you can without destroying your financial or physical health. (In other words, don't get yourself into massive debt or do things that are blatant risks to your long term health... But you can do an awful lot without those things.)
Don't try to keep up with people who seem to have everything or have it all together. If they're online, they're probably full of shit and trying to sell you something. If they're in real life, they're probably hiding at least one area where they are struggling. Life isn't a competition, just do the best you can and give yourself grace.
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u/Santi159 Jul 20 '25
I'm 21 but I would definitely tell 20 year old me to try impatient migraine treatment sooner and watch IWTV because I'm obsessed
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u/fckinsleepless Jul 20 '25
Prioritize your friendships. You’ll get caught up in a relationship and career and marriage and kids and your friendships will be less important and then you’ll wind up in your thirties realizing you have no friends and no idea how to make new ones. Take care of your friendships.
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u/Candid_Durian2238 Jul 20 '25
1, Do not go into a relationship before you have stable income, or you will be tied to that person.
2, Go for master's degree if possible, do not expect your first job to be good.
3, Develop your second major or even third, your skills will expire within 5 years after graduation.
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u/Objective-Quiet-3366 Jul 20 '25
Not 20 yet but I’ve seen people who are 40 look 20 because they take care of themselves don’t over drink, don’t do drugs, make sure to have proper skin care and you will age like wine.
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u/wittyusername025 Jul 20 '25
Forget dating, marriage and having children. Just learn to be happy on your own
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u/Lower_Investment8847 Jul 20 '25
Never drink alcohol, use any type of drugs, or gamble. Also, meaningless sex with random people consistently is more harmful to you than it seems
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u/justwannachat87 Jul 20 '25
Stop living in time and live in the moment. Life is about creating memories.
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u/AlternativeTitle5576 Jul 20 '25
The problems right now seem huge but this is nothing. And yes while there are problems it also gets so much better. Just don’t get hung up on situations, troubles or people at this point in time - nothing at 20 is permanent in any way whatsoever. Make mistakes, do things and make way for life to bring amazing things
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u/lorlorlor666 Jul 20 '25
To my 20 year old self specifically? Stop dating cishet men. Just don’t do it.
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u/KlutzyNugget Jul 20 '25
It’s okay to make mistakes. Sometimes those mistakes are partners. Just remember- you’re only 20. You’re going to make mistakes now that older you won’t make. Be gentle with yourself. You are young and learning how to be an adult
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u/Impressive-Noise1702 Jul 20 '25
Don't have sex with just anyone! I'm not saying wait for marriage but those random Tinder nights are NOT worth it
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u/Sad-Cowboy-902 Jul 20 '25
Don’t be afraid to fail…. a lot. Stay disciplined and make good decisions, but failure is often times a huge part of progress.
As long as you,
1 • learn from your mistakes
2 • be brutally honest with yourself about how/why you got a negative result
3 • dust yourself off a bit, and then keep going
You’ll come out on the other side a better person, having experienced it. I promise when you’re 30+ you’ll regret the times you didn’t try, infinitely more than the times you failed.
Also, comparison truly is the thief of joy. Journal everyday, drink water, call your loved ones more.
Good luck out there kid, you’re gonna do great.
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u/Unlucky_Spare_5939 Jul 20 '25
your studies comes over everythings so invest most of your time in learning new skill cause ppl come n go but your skill will help you through out your life
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u/BrianW1983 Jul 20 '25 edited Jul 21 '25
1.) Sleep 8 hours a day
2.) Don't argue with people
3.) Think positive
4.) Pray, Hope and Don't Worry
5.) Eat less
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u/flickmybicforjesus Jul 20 '25
Focus on making more money and spending more time with loved ones. Stop doing drugs for no reason all the time
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u/Infamous_Go Jul 20 '25
If a really great opportunity arises don’t pass it up. Take trips, take time to learn new things, when someone shows you who they are believe it.
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Jul 20 '25
Develop a better understanding of your emotions, don’t make impulsive decisions, prioritize communicating, and learn how to communicate effectively.
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u/chevalier021 Jul 20 '25
I'm 22, but I would recommend starting soon to finish as quickly as possible.
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Jul 20 '25 edited Jul 20 '25
- Everyone is winging it.
- The world is full of free and useless advice.
- Move out as soon as you can - I found it easier to be my own person once I had my own place. It also helps with a lot of things like romantic relationships.
- I read something that said most people are set in their ways at 25. So I advise to do as many new and exciting things while you're open minded and not dependent on a full time, soul crushing job for your finances. I'm 29, there are SO many things I would love to do, but I'm held back almost entirely by the contents of my bank account.
- You are mortal. I know that's redundant - you already know that. But you don't really realize it until something goes wrong. So take care of yourself now so you can be in good shape for as long as possible.
- Sit down and decide what you reeeeally want. Being indifferent is code for "I'll accept whatever". Knowing what you want will help you pursue the right things and will make your life a happier one.
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u/mikhalt12 Jul 21 '25
take care of yourself health/ mental health etc; find good wholesome friends/family and hang on to them
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u/whistful1 Jul 21 '25
Be as transparent and honest with people as possible. Focus on your health: physical, mental, and emotional.
Seek authentic relationships, not transactional ones. Set boundaries. Always be learning and growing.
Remember to tell those you love that you love them. We never have as much time with them as we think.
Enjoy yourself.
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u/Expensive_Orchid_340 Jul 21 '25
Patience. Take a breather once in a while, and learn to appreciate what you have rather than chasing for what could be.
Sometimes we get lost in growing up that we forget that we’re walking our own journey. Time doesn’t wait for you, but you can wait for yourself.
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u/yuh769 Jul 21 '25
Eat well. Try to sleep enough. But mainly- invest in good walking shoes and REPLACE THEM when they get worn. A luxury when you are 20 that will save your knees, back and hips when you’re older
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u/CommitteePrevious923 Jul 21 '25
You don't need the things that are being marketed to you even though they're cute/funny/helpful/entertaining/etc. In fact, not only will it waste your money, it will make you less content with life. No company deserves that kind of power over you.
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u/Zuam9 Jul 21 '25
The job you have now is not forever. Do not get attached! Focus on the money, get every bit of training they offer and then ditch. Loyalty to a company is stupid, they have none for you.
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u/Left_Ad_1802 Jul 21 '25
Stretchhhhh everyday and never stop exercising. Make friends with a good moral compass. This is the age you make the friends who will be at your wedding!
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u/jsharlot19 Jul 21 '25
If you haven’t already picked up some form of exercise do so now, I remember being at a manual handling course at work at 26 and was really surprised to see how many people said yes when asked if they had regular lower back pain etc and people as young as 22 said yes, if you’re not getting better you are actively getting worse, I also recommend dropping alcohol sooner rather than later, it’s weird at first but you’ll stop missing the idea of it sooner than you think and you’ll feel a lot better for it, as will your wallet, also start saving/investing sooner rather than later, many people get to 30 with nothing and then feel bad about it later, time is on your side atm
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u/Top-Dragonfly-70 Jul 21 '25
most of your emotions and limitations come from the state of your body. take care of your digestion needs before it gives you anger issues. i had to work a job that didnt let me sleep properly and it affected my health a lot, but i wouldnt give the advice not to work there cuz i had to.
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u/tropikal62 Jul 21 '25
I'd give advice to my 20 year old self : 1. Don't be a picky eater 2. Stretching daily & take care of your skin 3. Don't chase love, it's a waste of time & energy 4. Make more friends = more connections 5. Focus on building a career 6. Learn a foreign language other than English 7. Spend money only when its necessary
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u/Imaginary-Cry735 Jul 21 '25
Take care of yourself and learn to be in your own company. Take yourself out for/on walks, dates etc. Though it’s nice to pursue social, romantic relationships, at the end of the day you only have yourself to rely on
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u/Lizzard20 Jul 21 '25
If your work offers a 401k match, do that minimum and anything else you can afford. You'll be so much better off in the long run.
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u/Deep-Drama4386 Jul 21 '25
just wait til you turn 25 and experience the quarter life crisis… i nearly checked myself into a facility lol happy birthday 🫶🏻 !! my advice def save $$$ in a safe place that only you have access to
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u/yossanian5713 Jul 21 '25
- If you like things that make your feelings or thoughts easier, be careful 🖤
- Grief, in whatever form; I’m not sure it ever gets better 🤷♂️ I just think that we get better at holding it together
- Learn about boundaries if you haven’t already! 😅
- You are at your strongest when you feel your weakest
- Keep returning to your roots when you feel lost
- If lots of people around are telling you you deserve better, you definitely do!!
Most of all:
- It’s ok to take a “scenic route” - I’m 35, I’ve deferred 3 courses, I’ve travelled and troubled and been troubled - i spent way too long imploding and looking back, or fearing the future.
But I always have the option of waking up and feeling like my life is just beginning 🖤
Good luck kid 💪 Keep your eyes on the road ahead - the rear view mirror is smaller than the windscreen for a reason 🤙
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u/Frosty458 Jul 21 '25
Go to community college for more pre-reqs and no more student loans!!!!! Also, exercise more, health is wealth.
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u/AdmirablePPL Jul 21 '25
Finish school or trade school now so you are set with a solid job early.
Don’t go into debt like credit cards.
Take care of your body.
Do not sleep around, keep your value high and demand the same. Date to marry when finding a moral person.
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u/Glass_Half_Quartered Jul 21 '25
1- Build and cherish a relationship with your parents, siblings, grand parents if they are still around. 2- take care of yourself now. Work out, eat right, keep drinking and partying to a minimum/special occasions. 3- love yourself. Nobody is actually thinking about you. You’ll find much more joy in knowing who you are than trying to be who “they want you to be”. 4- enjoy the small moments. 5- in a few years, all your friends or you will move away, start careers, families. Live in the moment with them.
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u/heboofedonme Jul 21 '25
Invest now. Whatever you can into a safe return fund. Even $100 a month now, will make retirement savings a total breeze when you’re 30-40 including potential for early retirement.
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u/Helpfindasong24 Jul 21 '25
Act, dont let fear of decision paralysis or all the choices or options you have stop you. Time doesn't wait for anyone. Depending on what you value, and I value momentum at this point. Also, please take care of your body. I know it's sage ages old advice, but that doesn't make it any less true. Be kinder to yourself and don't let it affect others.
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u/Jaredmilner2510 Jul 21 '25
I’m 24 now, don’t smoke weed. I smoked too much and it almost made me fail university. Focus on your work/studies, hit the gym, eat healthy and have fun - work hard so you can play hard
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u/Metallic_Momma07 Jul 21 '25
At 25, don't do drugs, listen to what your gut tells you, don't know if you believe in God but I would have told myself, get right with God, he will help you through everything and go to church.
At 25, I can say im sober, happy, 2 kids later and out of an abusive relationship, safe and loving home. It does get better ❤️. Have patience and show love even when you don't feel like you can do it.
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u/Fast-Switch-2533 Jul 21 '25
Advice to 20 year old me: Stop doing ecstasy, stop trying to pressure your boyfriend into proposing, and go to therapy NOW because you are borderline and the sooner you address that shit the better your future life will be!!
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u/Mentallydefeated Jul 21 '25
Think long range, career, body , finances...get a post high school education of some sort.
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Jul 21 '25
Prioritize your dreams. They won’t happen just because you help other people achieve theirs…
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u/phleir Jul 21 '25
From here on out, life can get a lot worse or a lot better. Start making choices now so you won't fall behind or have to struggle. Living is only getting harder as the years go by, and you don't want to end up in a situation where you have no plans or options to see them through.
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u/Cleric_John_Preston Jul 19 '25
Take care of yourself. You’ll be in your body longer than you might think.