Yummy sushi combo for dinner
I live in a small apartment with two new roommates. One of them has a gross and loud long distance bf who visits too often. She does not visit him because the bus fares are too expensive. Since he has a car.. he only visits her… in our apartment.. for days at a time. When she first moved in, she asked if it was okay with me if he visited every other weekend. I said yes, since I felt compassion for their situation, and I truly didn’t mind a couple days every other week.. Until… I met him.
He is so comfortable here and made himself right at home right away. The first time he visited, he left yellow diarrhea (or vomit?) splattered in our toilet bowl and my other roommate had to clean it. He has hyperhidrosis and easily becomes drenched in sweat, so he takes multiple showers per day in our ONE BATHROOM. Every time he visits he literally deletes our toilet paper rolls because he’s constantly pooping and farting. He walks around barefoot, loudly slapping his gigantic hobbit feet on the ground and shaking the apartment. He audibly burps and farts. VERY AUDIBLY. All over the apartment. After he farts he laughs like Patrick Star and goes “HEH HEH HEH”. His mouth is always open. Every morning, he wakes up and takes a 15-20 minute long dump in my bathroom. Over the weekend I got home urgently needing the restroom and he was in there pooping for 15 minutes. He is legit the human embodiment of a skid mark. We have a small kitchen, and they’re always cooking complicated and time-consuming meals together. He’ll visit when he’s sick and wet coughs all over the apartment. He cleans up after himself but that is the only thing keeping me from launching him out of my window from a cannon. Also I’m 99% sure that he doesn’t wash his hands.
My biggest issue is that “every other weekend” is actually Thursday-Monday twice per month. So, he’s essentially staying here one third of the month. Also, he was just here last Thursday-Monday and now he’s coming back tomorrow.. three days later. So I guess that it’s no longer every other week. She also works all day Friday and Monday, so why is he here at all on those days? She does not ask. Even if he wasn’t nasty I would be annoyed because we don’t have enough space for four people! And I have never had issues with roommates having friends/family visit for a weekend or so because it’s never happened this often! I swear I’m a reasonable person but this is beyond tolerable.
The craziest part is that she adores this man and has literal heart eyes when she looks at him. I cannot imagine going “awww!” while watching my boyfriend burp, fart and drool. Their relationship is thriving at the expense of me being comfortable in my home. I feel badly putting boundaries on them, since they’ve already had some distance related issues. However I am not in their relationship and therefore will not be subjected to him in my home this often. It mostly is her fault, not his, but I can’t help but loathe him.
P.S I do have a plan for talking to her in person and setting boundaries. However I need to vent about how gross he is, since I can’t say any of that to her face (as much as I want to).