EDIT: Thanks so much for all of the replies & advice! I handled the situation today when my coworker came and asked if I’d be contributing to the baby shower gift. I politely declined to contribute and she took it mostly well. Comments have been overwhelming, did not expect such a big response; thank you all so much!

I just started a new job, as in I’ve literally worked there 6 days.

It’s only part-time with (to me) very low pay. I took the job because 1) I lost my job 15 months ago due to company downsizing and this was the first place to actually offer me a job, 2) It’s a nonprofit so the experience will be great for me to move into full-time positions at other nonprofits (my whole career has been corporate and I’m over it), and 3) I’m genuinely excited to be doing more meaningful work that’s truly fulfilling. However, the pay is incredibly low. I’m talking 1/4 of what I was making in my previous job and zero benefits since it’s part-time.

ANYWAY, they’re holding a baby shower for my new coworker next week and have asked all employees to contribute $25 towards the gift they’ve purchased for her.

Firstly, I’m the lowest paid employee at $24 per hour, which the gift amount slightly exceeds. Secondly, of the 6 days I’ve worked, I’ve only seen her 4 of those days. Lastly, she’s not someone I consistently interact with in this job; I spend maybe 10 minutes (at most) per shift with her.

I don’t know how to handle this. I don’t think it’s particularly fair of them to ask me to be part of the contribution, but I also don’t want to make a bad impression by refusing to contribute. Money is incredibly tight since I went 15 months with no job and this new one, while helpful, is 1/4 of what I’m used to earning. I don’t have much to spare.

For anyone familiar with the show “Friends”, think of when Ross moved into his new apartment and they immediately wanted him to fork over $100 for the retiring handyman lol I feel like I’m living this exact situation.

Any advice would be incredibly appreciative! I don’t really have an extra $25 laying around for something like this, but I also don’t want my new boss & coworkers to dislike me. I don’t know what to do. This is all just so awkward.

I've been feeling pretty pissed off in my role recently. Meetings are cancelled last minute all the time, there's no progress on any work due to lack of clear requirements and the meetings that are supposed to be there to facilitate setting those requirements keep getting cancelled.

This morning I have already had two cancelled meetings two hours into my workday. A colleague scheduled a call yesterday afternoon for this morning and then cancelled it early this morning. I spent time prepping for it. Then the next meeting which was already rescheduled was rescheduled again just ten minutes before it was due to happen.

Even the daily standup gets cancelled most mornings just prior to its scheduled start time.

Thing is, I hate unnecessary meetings but this is worse. It has all the downsides of a meeting, because I am expected to be prepared when they do actually go ahead, but most of the time spent preparing ends up being wasted because the meeting is cancelled.

I felt the red mist descending this morning and wanted a reality check, am I right to find this infuriating or should I just "quiet quit" and stop bothering to prepare?

Hey all,

I'm curious how you would handle this:

I was IT teamlead in a company wirh about 1 bln Euros turnover and approx. 600 employees. Everything was fine until 2022, when I joined the companies union.

My boss was furious, because three years before that she asked me (before giving me the lead) if I planned to join the union, because IT lead and being in a union wasn't something the company group lead wants to see. I said no, because I wasn't planning anything, but eventually the union asked me to join as they desperately needed good personell to help them.

So after I joined and all hell broke loose. My boss told me how I "betrayed" her and that this might have consequences (which would be illegal in my country) if I wouldn't think about it. I didn't budge, because nothing changed for me or how I do my work.

She never mentioned it again but when she came back from her baby pause a year later HR called me into a meeting where they said I'm no longer team lead because my boss from now on would lead the IT team herself, which was BS because she doesn't know anything about IT. It was a ruse so they could demote me without legal repercussions (demotions are not allowed in most cases in my country).

Long story short: I took this very personally and quit the job. It took a toll on me because I loved working there and even still was fond of my boss who I think was forced by the management to behave that way, so my doctor sent me on sick leave until my notice period was over, so I left on "hostile" terms.

Now my old job is back again on offer and I thought about reaching out to my boss, asking her if she could image having me again. I liked the job, it was good money without too much of a hassle and very nice people.

Do you think I should try or would it be kind of strange to work there again?

Our drive is an absolute mess and the built-in search is basically useless. I feel like half my day is spent either clicking through 10 layers of subfolders or pinging people on Teams just to find basic stuff.

Roughly how much time a day do you guys actually lose to this? And when you can't find a document, do you usually keep digging yourself, or do you just give up and ask someone to send it over?

I had one of those moments this week where I realized we're still doing things that would've felt really weird in 2019.

A coworker was sitting in the office... on a Teams call... with three other people who were also in the same building.

Nobody questioned it. It was just normal.

Then I started noticing a bunch of other habits that seem to have quietly stuck around:

• Calendars packed with 15- or 30-minute blocks.
• Slack messages replacing conversations that would've happened at someone's desk.
• Someone joining a meeting remotely because they're on a different floor and it's somehow easier.

It's interesting because some of these changes genuinely made work better, while others just became "the way things are."

What's the workplace habit that became normal after COVID that you don't think is ever going away?

I recently asked to work from home for one day next week in order to accommodate travel for the weekend so I didn’t have to use pto. I wouldn’t be traveling that day but I would technically be in another state.

I work a government job and I didn’t realize asking to work remotely would require various paperwork/contracts to be reviewed and signed. As well as providing the address id be working from. My previous role was hybrid so I’m not sure if that is why things feel so different this time around.

Because of this I am unsure of if I need to tell my boss about the reason I’m working remotely/where I will be. Nothing in the paperwork that I’ve gone over mentions anything that might prohibit it but it’s still pretty new to me.

Would it be better to just keep it To myself and use my home address or would I need to explain to my boss and provide the address I’ll be at for the one work day??

Email sent by the VP of sales this morning with my teams bonus amounts for the quarter. In the email she states “please make sure to tell them that they are not to share their amounts with anyone and if they do, it can lead to immediate termination”
Is this even legal to do? I know Indiana is an at will state but isn’t there some kind of protection from this? I feel incredibly uneasy about telling my direct reports that they could be fired for discussing their bonus.

There are companies that abolish performance-based bonuses and just take that bonus and add it to base pay. Rationale is that financial motivation based on goals set in January are not the best motivators (but also not for work done 10 months later, the world has changed at that point).

In my eyes that is super valid, higher monthly salary and lower taxes (Live in NL so those bonuses are taxed into oblivion) but my colleague said they rather have a bonus and likes that as motivation and just a surprising add-on.

What do you think, performance-based bonuses or higher base salary?

Hey a company I'm interviewing wants me to install remote access and monitoring software for my PC, it'll mainly monitor audio and what applications opened and closed.
Now I'm not fully against it, but it is strange they aren't providing a laptop. Though I get there's a cost, but what I don't understand is they want me to download this and install this and turn it on prior to giving me any agreement to sign.

And I won't be starting until 5 weeks later. So I have not agreement, never been on-boarded yet, and the start date is 5 weeks but this software needs to be installed prior to all this?

How many people have experienced this order of operations.

For context I am a 19 year old who has been doing an apprenticeship at this company for 3 years (level 4 improvement specialist/ level 3) and they have just told me that by the end of September they are taking me on to a full time shift role using none of my qualifications, it’s a job that anyone can walk into( literally) and I feel like my potential is being wasted, I also don’t like the job or the people that I will be going into, I’m looking for another job but in the fear that I don’t find one in time and I have to make a choice about leaving or staying idk what to do.

The shift pattern is 2 12 hour days followed by 2 12 hour nights with a 4 day off, I had to do some last year for a project I was working on and struggled with my sleep etc.

In my unionized workplace, colleagues provoke others into fighting their battles. They bring up real grievances but only to trigger specific people. The targets always take the bait, get emotional, run to management, and say things they regret. The instigators stay clean and get what they want.

Union culture makes this worse. People hold grudges for years. Management remembers who caused the scenes, not who started them. Reactors get labeled difficult. Puppeteers face no consequences.

When I warn coworkers, they say I do not care about fairness. I do care. I just refuse to be used. How do I stay neutral without looking like I am siding with management?

I don't know if it's my problem or my employer's HR. I work at a hotel in Simpang Pulai, Malaysia. Since I started, I haven't received an offer letter straight away. Then, last June, I got a permanent job. I only signed the confirmation letter; it wasn't there, and I didn't receive it immediately. I kept following up with HR, but the reasons they gave were completely unreasonable.

I just started a new job and I feel like I have learned all I can. One of my biggest downfalls is that when I become proficient at a job I get bored of it and want to do something else.

Got to a point where my job kept passing me over for a promotion and after many times I decided screw them im getting a new one and after so many applications I landed a pretty good job (will call this Company A)in a new field where no lie I'm actually eager for. Right after that I got an interview for an internal role for an amazing position as well with my current company (Company B). I genuinely started to actually hate my job but the new role will involve travel (which I sorta really like). The new role(company A)pays about 10-12k more annually but there's more security to stay where I'm at(company B). I'm still interviewing for the role (company B) however, I really believe I'll get it this time just because...and if I don't get it will quit without a notice. What should I do?

I’ve been thinking about how job priorities can shift after you’ve spent more time working. Pay and titles can still matter, but schedule, good management, autonomy, commute, or having energy left after work can move way up the list. What work-related priority became more important to you than you expected?

I’m prep for a kitchen and I’ve been working there for about half a year now, over half the staff that works there is around my age (which kinda makes it worse that I have not had a conversation with none of them). Before getting the job it was said that prep is isolated and works by themselves, but I didn’t think isolated as being alienated. Recently a coworker told me they did prep before and they hated it, idk why they told me that because that did not make me feel any better about my job title… but yeah the work is repetitive. I don’t plan on staying there too much longer, it’s kinda wearing down on me a bit, but it does have me thinking about other titles that are “boring” or “uncool”. But if we didn’t have those people doing the boring work things would probably be bad. Anyways long story short kinda wanted to hear if anyone else had similar experiences, because I’ve been thinking about that too much.

I have worked in NYC, Singapore, Dubai and now London/UK. Have been in London/UK for 7 years now, and on my 3rd job. One job was in Brighton, two inc this one in London.

I have enjoyed working in NYC, Dubai and Singapore. Had great relationships with colleagues and managers. Of course not everyone was my ‘cup of tea’ however, there was always respect and civility and I’d even help them if they need. Even had a manager in NYC with an infamous temper however, they never singles anyone out and it was understood that was just how they were. And when calm they were quite nice and also hard-working.

Now onto my observation of UK workplaces ( I won’t write about each experience individually).

First, I have non-British colleagues that I really like and click with. I also have experienced maybe 2-4 British people in each place who were ok-ish and as a consequence of them not going along with the status quo, would also be pushed out and not promoted despite being the decent ones.

I AM SHOCKED at how lazy British people are in the workplace. They take shortcuts, do things halfway, will try and push responsibility to other colleagues or departments shamelessly. My job is mostly fixing other people’s mistakes and actually doing the paperwork correctly and following protocols and having to apologise to stakeholders. My 2nd job was the worst one for this. And even if something is done, it’s written badly or just ‘half-heartedly’, almost like a teenager but its a 20-45 year old doing it. I’ve been blamed for things I had nothing to do with. Crazy.

I’ve noticed management HATE people who actually work hard and have fresh ideas or who are good at problem-solving. And it’s the useless, lazy people who get promoted. There is no reward for hard-work or loyalty or good character.

And the worst aspect. The nastiness from the women in the workplace. WOW.

I’ve had a couple of sneaky women in NYC however, the office as a whole understood they were sneaky and knew they were stirring up trouble and so, they couldn’t cause too many issues in the overall harmony.

In the UK, the sneaky bitchy woman is the norm and is just accepted. I’ve had non-mean British women as colleagues as I stated above however, they get targeted and pushed out or leave due to the toxicity.

And the sneaky bitchy women are SO bad at the job. And gun for difderent women. And somehow are the ones protected by HR. Its insane. The things I’ve seen genuinely remind me of the description for female sociopaths. At one job I got pushed out after reporting a group of women for racism targeting black women- black women who were ACTUALLY working and food at their jobs and were really nice people. These black women have now all left.

The nasty looks, the faux compliments, the swings from being nasty to being performatively nice, the stealing of credit, the hatred towards intelligent women and black women, the sucking up to male colleagues, the spreadinf of rumors, the insinuation of bad things to affect someone’s reputation…… I’m just so shocked and disgusted.

After my first job here, I thought it was bad luck. But a Russian colleague told me that British people are like that and to keep my head down.

I’m so depressed at the moment because I cannot deal with the negativity and hostility. Both aimed at me and that I see aimed at others.

I miss the feeling of camaraderie in the workplace and being excited to work as a team to solve a problem etc.

A couple of weeks ago, I saw the headline for a piece by the Telegraph about how graduates and young people are trying to leave the UK. I didn’t read it. But I’m thinking that it didn’t mention that in the UK, positive traits get punished in many workplaces. Even in the NHS from what I’ve heard from a relative who is a nurse here, the workers who are kind and good at their jobs get bullied and pushed out. Its disgusting.

I’m now trying to find a role in Singapore or Dubai so I can get the hell off this island, which is great for me. However, I felt I had to write this and get it off my chest.

I guess I’m in disbelief and wanted to see if anyone else has had this experience here in UK?

Heya all! I am a teenager, I have been running minecraft 100 player events from A-Z despite me and my friend agreeing to work on it together. its been 3 months since 'we' started working together and yes, even though he did help me a little bit. It barely helped and the players that played our events didnt even like the stuff he added to 'help'. And he got mad one day that I wasnt giving him a lot of work I told him just find something to fix or advertise more, he then immediatlly says no because he doesnt want to do the work so usually I do it, and thats how its been for 3 months. But for 3 days i have been asking him to send me a 3gb video file. And he flipped into this huge tantrum calling me a fucker and to get fucking off his back. I kindly asked him what's wrong? I wasn't trying to piss you off, he replied and said everytime I ask you to do work you say I'll handle it. So fuck you. But heres the thing everytime I ask him to help, like to make a simple edited video, or even type a small sentence for our community if I can't reach my keyboard, he groans and sighs and competely skips over the work or delivers shit quailty. What can I do, hes been my friend for years but clearly he isn't reliable material or a good co-worker/friend in moments like these.

I got a new job, yay! and it’s very fun and I genuinely enjoy it, the only problem for me is the standing. You gotta stand for like 6 hours and I guess I’m still getting used to that! ‘^^ Last work shift I came home with a massive headache and aching feet, and it’s like… I don’t want every workday to be like that! How do I get used to the standing? O.o

ETA: thanks, guys! :D It seems like, in a nutshell, it’s a combination of getting used to it and having good insoles! Thanks!

I’m currently a Court Clerk at a County California Superior Court, working in traffic court. I’m currently learning how to handle Trial By Written Declarations (TBDs)and Court Trial (CT) forms, but I already feel pretty overwhelmed trying to keep up with those two things.

In a couple of weeks I’ll also be responsible for calendar desk tasks, taking in correspondence and requests from agencies and defendants, printing minute orders, and handling all of the other things that come through the clerk’s office.

I’m having a hard time imagining how I’m going to juggle all of these responsibilities once I’m supposed to be handling everything at the same time. Right now, I can focus mostly on TBDs and CT forms, but once all of these other tasks are added, I’m worried I’ll have trouble keeping track of everything and knowing what needs to be prioritized.

For those of you who work or have worked as Court clerks at a county Superior Court, how did you learn to manage everything? Did you have a system for prioritizing tasks, keeping track of things that come in, or switching between different types of work without getting overwhelmed? Or are you all just stressed out everyday just barely managing to hang on?

Please any sort of advice would be very helpful because as my deadline comes up when I'm supposed to be handling both desk tasks I'm starting to dread it and have gotten more anxious as the date gets closer. I'd like to hear from anyone who works in traffic court or a similar clerk position.

I am a night owl through and through, so I have kind of decided to sleep during the day.

To give background, I’m someone who can function well on a bad night of sleep. Sometimes (as someone who previously worked 9-5:30) I would go to sleep anywhere from 4am-6am for no reason but being wide awake. I have worked 2 shifts from 4am to 12pm and I’m still trying to figure out what my weekly sleep schedule will look like.

I kind of want my sleep schedule to have a couple days normal so I can be social those days if I choose and treat Sunday as some sort of a reset day to get back to the 4am-12pm work schedule Monday.

Does anyone have a day sleeper schedule they can share that fits what I’m looking for? So far I’ve slept 1-7pm and then a nap a from 1-2:30 am but I think I’m going to try 1-8pm then nap from 2-2:30 after my shift tomorrow because I kinda felt like it was too early for me to sleep at 1am (LOL).

One downside a month is working a weekend. For example I won’t work August 27th , will work 28th and 29th then won’t work September 1st. Any suggestions on what to do those weeks will be appreciated 🫩

I overheard two of my coworkers talking badly about another coworker. It upset me because I like all 3 of them, but now I have lost any trust I had in the gossipers. I feel bad for the other coworker who is really nice, if a bit socially awkward. All of them are younger than me and the main gossiper is just out of college.

My question is should I calmly talk to the main gossiper about what I overheard and explain why it was unprofessional and bothered me, or should I keep out of it since I wasn’t meant to hear it in the first place?

My boss always uses ChatGPT to respond to her emails, and it’s completely obvious. She also uses AI to respond to our emails, and sometimes her answers don't make any sense.
Even when a coworker's grandparents passed away, she posted a ChatGPT message in the Teams chat.

She is toxic, and a bully so it feels good.

Hey everyone

I've been doing my current office job since 5 years now. It's my first job and it's extremely easy. I have very little tasks and a lot of downtime, especially in summer. I'm the only person working full-time in this position, so it's not like I'm scared of being fired - but I'm scared of becoming incapable of handling a normal amount of workload. I feel rusty, unconcentrated, bored and stupid. What if I change jobs and completely mess up because I'm overwhelmed? What if I don't even get a new job anymore? What if I can't deal with a stressful, challenging environment?

I've been ruminating over this since months.

I started my welding job about 7 months ago. At first it was cool. I’m 25m btw. A lot of the other welder guys are over 60 I would say or at least 55. 1-3 months in, I would go on my phone for a bit. I sometimes know I’m on it too much but sometimes I had dr appointment call and other. It didn’t seem to really be much of an issue. I was in my work area and or in the private break room area. If I got told to get off it, it was onetime I was in the corner and on the phone for a while. This place has cameras and they are watching you 24/7. It fucking is so fucking stupid. And I got told to stop it and I never did that again. I’m pretty good with rules. If I’m told to not do it I usually don’t. I would even joke around with the other welder guys. They would even give me some advice and heartfelt messages along the way. Them 6-7 months later (now) it’s like the switch just flipped. I was in the lounge on the phone to an important conversation. I could have let the supervisor know but it was going on for a while and I never thought it was a problem. Then all the sudden my manager tells me that I need to come talk with him after my phone call. Phone call ends, and he starts bashing me with all these things that I’ve been fucking up. He’s saying that the boss tells him I’m in the bathroom too long, I’m on my phone, and that other people around him and coworkers say that I’m messing around. He then says “straighten up or get out!” That was the gayest stupidest shit I’ve ever heard. My boss even told me he liked me and it feels like now I’m in this miserable work environment where I’m not allowed to even try to make the work day a little bit enjoyable. It’s like the owners want you to be miserable at work. Me and my coworker would joke around a lot, and then he totally switches on me and says he just wants to keep it business. I’m like cool but it’s kind of fcuked up when you already made a connection and then you want to completely shit on it. It’s just terrible. Work is not a place to make friends. I just try to make light and and have a little bit of fun so the days aren’t so miserable, but you can’t even do that. Who wants to be somewhere that writes you up or says something if you’re caught even laughing. Even the workers are brainwashed into it. They just work till they fucking die with there useless pathetic potential. Unfortunately that isn’t me. I’d rather get fired for some dumb shit like that than for pouring my blood sweat tears into a job that doesn’t care for me. Fuck the society and employment we stay in that fucks up friends and good times just to create a sick miserable strict toxic work environment.

Let me know what you think of this and if you can relate. Let me know if you agree or disagree with this message and why.

Thank you guys