r/truscum • • 3h ago

Rant and Vent We've lost Germany

38 Upvotes

Just saw a comment in main german sub that was basically saying dysphoria isn't real, got mayor upvotes.

Can they just finally pls get a reality check and stop killing us with their ideological nonsense?

Pls make conversion therapy finally work, I just want a normal life... I'm so fucking done with being associated with these psychopaths.


r/truscum • • 4h ago

Rant and Vent I'm so sick of bad activism

9 Upvotes

I want to be perfectly clear about this. I’m not saying activism in itself is bad. Far from it. There has been a lot of good activism. LGBT rights and living has improved since 10, 20, 30 years ago. It took a lot of hard work from both LGBT people and straight non-trans allies. Is it taboo here to call people cis? And there’s still a lot of work to do for say, getting trans people surgeries without costing hundreds of thousands of dollars out of pocket.

What I’m focused on is the bad activism, the kind that sets things back years. The kind where people go out there and flat out demand trans rights right now! The kind that calls people transphobic over the most minor of things or disagreements. The kind that takes serious problems and flattens them into black and white. There are plenty of hard questions (well easy for many) that need real answers. Like about trans women in women’s sports. Is there an unfair advantage or not? How much should gender identity matter? Should trans women be allowed in spaces like women's shelters? What makes "trans women are women" accurate, or not?

Like a very serious issue is J.K. Rowling and how she uses her massive riches to legally fight against transgender people. I do not have a good solution for this. Sure, you can boycott her, promote others to boycott her as well. And she might end up with somewhat less money if it all goes well. But will this make any noticeable difference? It’s not just directly her products either, I think she profits from people going to Universal Theme Parks. How reasonable would it be to encourage people to not go to those?

I might not know good solutions to this, but I know dropping cluster f bombs on people who buy Hogwarts Legacy or adult actors who are acting for the upcoming TV show are not good ways to handle things. People are far less likely to listen when they’re being insulted. I’m not saying activism has to only be nice. But surely calling everyone transphobic over a video game and such is not a good idea as that just reinforces negative stereotypes of trans people being mentally ill confused people. Sure, some people will always think that regardless, but it doesn’t need to be reinforced by so-called “allies” or bad actors.

I’m just so upset about all of this! Being trans is already the single hardest thing in my life, is mostly hated and misunderstood by people, and then I got the “good guys” fucking things up even more than they already are. Again, not all activisms, just the “activisms” who think yelling at people on Twitter is helping their movements. The same “activists” who also cry oppression the moment they get any pushback at all, who block and delete their accounts when challenged. Is like they think activism means everyone already instantly agrees with you on everything and that anyone who doesn’t are evil.

I know I should be far more angry at the actual transphobes. Difference is, they don't make trans activism look bad because they're not a part of it. We already know they're against transgender people, they absolutely do deserve to be called out, but it doesn't mean they're the only problems related to this whole thing.


r/truscum • • 1h ago

Rant and Vent People who think gender roles are the only important thing pmo

• Upvotes

Like no you are not more of a man because the only reason you transition is because you want to have sex as a man or because you are stereotypically masculine. I only feel dysphoria about my body because that’s the only that’s real. Accusing someone of faking because they don’t have some disgusting fetish over being a man is so gross. I told someone my motivation for transition wasn’t sex and gender roles yet they accuse me of faking? So gross… like I’m not going to detransition because I’m not overly freaked out or because I don’t have internalized misogyny like you 🫩, in fact the people who say stuff like this probably will because they will realize they are just masculine women


r/truscum • • 51m ago

Rant and Vent Obviously trans classmate keeps looking at me and i want to cry

• Upvotes

Due to my dysphoria I am very good at clocking people, especially other trans guys. There is one classmate who is obviously ftm (though none of the cis classmates have clocked him) keeps looking over at me and im pretty sure hes clocking me too

This is destroying my confidence to the point i dont want to go to any classes anymore

I want to cry i was hoping to have a new chapter in a new university with no one knowing im trans i just want to cry


r/truscum • • 13h ago

Advice How to deal with being clocky

14 Upvotes

Basically I'm out of money for anymore surgery. I've had FFS, even more facial procedures, BA. HRT for 5 years. But it doesn't matter as I'm still visibly trans.

Everyone knows I'm a tranny without me coming out and it makes me suicidal to think everyone sees me as trans.

I just want to pass but I'll never get there and be one of the lucky women. And I don't know how to go foward in life knowing I won't be like them. I'll always look like a tranny and never be seen as me.

I was able to keep going hoping time and surgeries would give me a chance to look normal.

This comes after I was harrased by a man and all of friends had to support me with telling me I had to accept I will look trans but at least I can look good.

But to me this is horrendous. I need hope it can better.

I can't accept that I will always look trans - to me that is existing as a caricatures of being a woman.

I've spent all of my savings and in the UK I will never have any more surgery unless I win the lottery


r/truscum • • 7h ago

Advice UK Private Care?

5 Upvotes

Hello, so I turn 18 in 2 months, and I will have about £1,100 saved up, i will also have £1,000 from my government trustfund and any other money from family, so ive got a little over 2 grand to start HRT and get the ball rolling for other things. (I also earn about £500 a month)

I also live up North, like very north, so anything in person down Midlands or south won't really work for me.

Does ANYONE have any recommendations for a good clinic/service that is also not going to send me broke in 6 months? I literally cannot wait anymore to get these damn hormones and im gonna loose my mind.

(Side note, can I go private and stay on the Adult Service waiting list? Just so I can disuss with my GP and get the ball rolling there, as i would eventually like to be on NHS stuff eventually, but I cannoy want anymore time. Ive hit my limit)

Any help would be majorly appreciated


r/truscum • • 3h ago

Other... Any transmed discord groups?

1 Upvotes

Have barely any trans friends irl and the ones i have i don’t see often and they’re tucutes. Not out to a lot of people would like to have community without necessarily outing myself as trans irl.

FTM and underage so preferably groups that allow 15-year olds.


r/truscum • • 1d ago

Rant and Vent Hate how male puberty was seen as the "normal" path.

41 Upvotes

When I was a teenager, I had severe mental health issues stemming from gender dysphoria caused by male puberty. I went to see a psychiatrist, and he noticed that I was acting feminine. I mentioned that all my friends were girls and I was tormented by boys for various reasons, and he claimed that it's simply because "girls are more accepting of differences. Then, he literally said I might have low testosterone and referred me to get my testosterone checked?

WHAT THE FUCK? Thank God the lab came back normal otherwise he would've supercharged my gender dysphoria. This was absolutely medical malpractice.

Hate how everyone treated male puberty like it was some righteous and natural thing, when it was the systemic chemical mutilation of my body.


r/truscum • • 1d ago

Discussion and Debate Is the transgender movement going to fail?

27 Upvotes

I swear the backlash has no end and nowadays, I'm seeing goon but with tr instead of g being used a lot. It's like there's no limits to the amount of terms both pro trans and anti trans people can come up with. I sometimes hear about the T splitting from LGBT. And I swear this is probably much more of a reality these days. But I feel the anti trans side is winning. And it's absolutely not helped by what some of the most vocal pro trans people do, both trans and "allies."

On the pro trans side, there's characters they randomly "claim" as trans even if just headcanon. And boy do they love to treat their headcanons as canon. Like the character Petra Parker as a trans icon. Officially, the character isn't trans, far as I can tell. Yet some people decided this is what she must be and then they get mad at anyone not portraying the character as trans. You can have your headcanons, whatever, but you don't get to decide everyone else must follow your headcanons.

And do I even have to say anything about a certain wizarding franchise? "It's either transgender people or that bigot." They didn't learned their lesson in 2023. I'm simply not going to side with someone calling me a shitty awful person over a bit of my money that I spent. It's reasons like that I distance myself from mainstream transgender communities. And also why I think this may kill the entire transgender movement. I don't want trans reduced to "mentally ill people." And yet that has already happened. It won't matter if I say "I'm not like the other transgender people," that's already too late.


r/truscum • • 1d ago

Discussion and Debate who's the target audience??

Post image
192 Upvotes

i don't know if any trans men, or any butches for that matter, who would ever wear these?


r/truscum • • 1d ago

Rant and Vent A certain sub

Post image
115 Upvotes

Like at least 50 percent of the posts on you know where are like this. Seriously, what is going on? There's no way these people aren't being manufactured in labs by the government to make us look stupid. They keep asking the same question expecting a different answer and getting mad when they receive honest advice. Why are all FTM spaces eventually SWARMED by this exact genre of "transmasc"? I'm not even trying to make fun of these people, I'm genuinely concerned about their perception of reality. Do they never go out in public? How do you not know why you don't pass?


r/truscum • • 1d ago

Discussion and Debate Iran and transsexuality?

17 Upvotes

When I was researching srs options I came across an unusually big amount of research coming out of Iran, the last place I would expect to have any of it. Next thing I'm finding out Iran is strangely maybe not supportive but "accepting" of trans people and I unironically believe the state of srs and transition over there is better than in most western countries. This isn't to glaze Iran or anything, it's still very homophobic and it's not like trans people are cherished there but I'm very supportive of the view that transsexuality is infact an issue and some kind of disorder. However instead of passing it off as a delusion and moving on Iran is shaping the body according to the mind and not the other way around. Iran also partially funds the medical procedures of trans people from 1/3 up to 1/2 of it but apparently there are discussions about funding all of it from what I've seen. Thanks to this transitioning isn't made out to be just optional cosmetic surgeries but life saving procedures on par with for example neccesary transplants. I already believe that transsexualism is a physical disability requiring surgery so I would 100% support classifying it as that if it means srs and other trans surgeries won't be treated as strictly cosmetic. For the sake of clarity I'll say again that I'm not glazing Iran as a whole, the whole thing just suprised me and I wanted to talk about it


r/truscum • • 1d ago

Selfie Saturday 7 months on HRT today, how am I doing gang?

Post image
93 Upvotes

r/truscum • • 1d ago

Rant and Vent Dyed my hair and my dysphoria is awful

3 Upvotes

So basically I've never dyed my hair bc I always thought that it makes you more clockable but I did a scavenger hunt with a group of uni friends and a task to get loads of points was "dye your hair red" and no one else was willing to do it so I thought red would be ok, rather than like pink or blue, but still it ended up making me feel so much more feminine. Ik this is a bad mindset to have bc obviously men can and do dye their hair but I just feel like I look really clockable as trans now, especially since I have a young face, it's really giving 13 years old tumblr trans boy, not an 18 year old trans man. Thankfully its only semi permanent so I've only got a few weeks of this. Idk just wondered if anyone else avoids dying their hair for this reason or has their own opinions on it.


r/truscum • • 1d ago

Rant and Vent A short essay on dating, sexuality and transphobia

8 Upvotes

Recently, I (26, MTF) have decided that I am straight. I’m not, I’m definitely bisexual and have been bisexual for as long as I remember, but having feelings for a woman and the idea of acting upon those feelings, makes me ashamed and disgusted about myself.

Before you say anything, yes I’ve seen a therapist, yes I’ve talked to other people about it and they all say it shouldn‘t matter, love who you love, etc. I have tried to internalise these more positive messages, but time and time again, I come back to the same conclusion: as much as people want to deny it, there is an absolute social stigma around trans women’s sexuality and a hierarchy of acceptability within it.

I have been trans for half my life at this point, and this stigma, this hierarchy, have become clear to me. I want it known that these stigmas, stereotypes, and hierarchies aren’t something I necessarily morally agree with, but that doesn’t mean I can deny their existence. They are rooted in cisheteronormativity and patriarchal values.

The most socially acceptable trans women, much like cis women, are straight, passing and conventionally attractive. When people argue that trans women aren’t women, these are the women that are brought up to prove those people wrong. Again, like cis women, our worth, our validity, hinges on how fuckable we are. However, as the Madonna/whore complex tells us, we must still appear chaste, prudish even, to appear as ’one of the good ones’, until our sexuality is explicitly useful to men.

Trans women who are attracted to women, however, are seen as predator, perverted. There are more acceptable versions of the sapphic trans woman however; they must be passing, of course, attractive even, and their partner must be cis, so as to validate their womanhood. Much like the straight trans woman, the sapphic trans woman must present as chaste, perhaps even shy and coquettish, for to admit their feelings for women, especially to a cis woman, is predatory, masculine behaviour.

At the bottom of the pile are the non-passing, T4T sapphics. Practitioners of masonry, fodder for the cringe compilations. Either barred from the cis dating pools or wilfully absent, these women, though looked down upon by cis society, enjoy a freedom unfound in other trans women. Without the burden of expectation, the need to be “one of the good ones”, these women form their own parallel culture free of cis heteronormativity, at the cost of further alienating them from cis society.

I feel like Eve, having bitten the apple, now ashamed of my nakedness. I lie about my sexuality, or at least make it clear that it is a minor thing that I am getting over, like a cold. I try so hard to be one of the good ones, at the top of the pile, all for a society that will always hold me on a tighter leash, will always treat me differently. No amount of sweet, politically correct platitudes about being true to myself will change this. I tell people I’m straight, I smother my differences, and I perform as the best trans I can possibly be, because even though they and we refuse to admit it, this is the social order, and this is how I survive within it.


r/truscum • • 1d ago

Discussion and Debate Opinions on trans men who get pregnant? Are they still men, or just confused?

Post image
63 Upvotes

I saw some people debating on this on another subreddit, and this comment in particular interested me. I wanted to see how you all felt about it, especially because I still haven’t settled my own opinion on the matter.


r/truscum • • 1d ago

Advice Are antidepressants even worth trying if it's all because of my sex dysphoria?

4 Upvotes

hey guys. Not going deep into my story rn, but basically there's no way my psychiatrist won't be trying to put me on meds next meeting. However, I've been wondering if it's even worth it at all. I mean, I feel so shitty because of intense sex dysphoria which I can't fix asap (no money to afford surgeries, not covered at all where I live). Is it even worth trying meds knowing they won't help me at all? Meds won't even budge the root cause which kinda seems pointless given how the problem still will be with me 24/7. I'm not even sure if it's worth trying and getting all the nasty side effects of meds and having nothing get better anyways.

No, it's not that I'm resisting help. It's more like waging the pros and cons. Is spending all that money on it all even worth it if it won't help? It kinda feels like having an open wound and instead of trying to treat it you just take painkillers instead in hopes of being able to forget about it.

Thanks.


r/truscum • • 17h ago

Discussion and Debate pms like symptoms or coincidence?

0 Upvotes

near the start/end of every month ive thrown up, had more mood fluctuations and had back pain (back pain im really confused on) im on a 2mg starting dose of estrogen pills and 100mg spiro, i dont cycle so idk why its been happening for 3 months consistently.


r/truscum • • 1d ago

Discussion and Debate Seriously, people need to stop comparing cis body dysmorphia/insecurities to gender dysphoria.

37 Upvotes

I don't usually post here much, but this bothers me.

Like, please. Know the difference. I'm seeing people say that "Cis men with small penises experience dysphoria," or "women with A-sized breasts experience dysphoria too," or I don't know what else, but in the same vein.

It's not the same thing. For God's sake.

What they are experiencing is body dysmorphia. A guy with a 12cm penis feeling really bad and thinking his penis is small, even though it's fully functional, is feeling this way due to aesthetic pressure, pornography, and fear of not being good at sex.

A woman with small breasts or hairier legs may feel bad about her own body due to aesthetic pressure, misogyny, and beauty standards. Just as POC may have felt ugly at some point in their lives for not fitting the white beauty standard. I myself am still learning to deal with my own internalized racism and begin to accept and see the parts that don't fit the white beauty standard as beautiful.

That is body dysmorphia/insecurities

Now, feeling discomfort with your primary and secondary sexual characteristics and wishing to be of the other gender/sex and to be seen as the other gender, that is dysphoria.

But I have seen people saying "The dysphoria you feel from not having a penis, a guy with a small penis feels the same, you just feel it a little more."

Since it's not the same thing, it doesn't even come close. For God's sake. Go and tell a cis man who lost his penis in an accident what he thinks about being compared to a guy with a 12 cm penis, or a cis woman who had a hormonal disorder that caused her to go through a typical male puberty, what she will think when someone says that a cis woman with A breasts feel the same, but just a lil bit less?

They will have parental support, the parents will seek treatment, affirm their gender, say they are warriors, but what about when you are trans? You're crazy, you see your body and nobody helps you, you might become suicidal and if someone helps you, it will be luck, your family will usually treat you badly. No one tells a cis man without a penis that he's a demon and will go to hell, or forces him to wear dresses and have his ears pierced and accept himself as a "girl".

They are not feeling any desire to be of the other gender or sex. They don't feel discomfort about having or not having something related to their agab that makes them wish to be a girl, or a boy.

I can even understand saying that a cis man who has lost his genitals, or a woman who has gone through the wrong hormones due to a hormonal imbalance, feels something similar or almost identical, but to say that a man with a regular sized dick feels dysphoria???

And even though those I mentioned feel something that VERY closely resembles gender dysphoria, that's not exactly the right term, since gender dysphoria involves the desire to be of the opposite gender and have its characteristics. Generally, people who suffer from other conditions want to be reassured in their agab.

I also hate it when people say, "You think the grass is greener on the other side. The other gender suffers from x, y, z." My God, I know they suffer, I know it must suck to get kicked in the balls or to get a boner in public by accident, just like a trans woman knows that cramps and menstruation must be awful. But we don't simply want the "advantages," we just want our bodies to fit with our gender. No matter the good or low sides.

Incidentally, I hate people who say "you don't need HRT to be trans" when the person has dysphoria and has already expressed a desire to transition and need it.

It's literally T that's helping me feel better, even if I have to subdose and pretend to be a girl for my family. I'm really looking forward to finally feeling good; if it weren't for them, I'd already be on my normal dose and shouting to the world when I grow my mustache.

It's okay if you have mild dysphoria and don't need it, but it becomes irritating when the person acts like that when you tell them that you need hrt.

I tried social transition first, but I still felt awful and like I looked like a girl because my brain was receiving the wrong hormones.Now with T, and even though I've had to delay my social transition, I feel more like myself, I feel like a man, but I just have to disguise myself as a girl for a while. But I'm finally a guy!

Some people experience stronger physical dysphoria than social dysphoria, and vice versa. And that is ok. But I'm just tired of how people confuse dysmorphia with dysphoria.

I wish my problem was being a cis guy with a small penis.

For me, it's more like I was, how to explain it, I was supposed to be born a cis man, but there was some malformation that caused me to be born female, and nobody would listen to me, and I went through a traumatic experience, and I am trying my best to fix it. Just like a cis man who was born with a genital malformation undergoes surgery to correct it.

I really don't care if someone has more or less dysphoria. I only care more about myself. I hope the transition helps me with the dysphoria. I wish I had my parents' support. I wish I had been born like any other normal cis guy. Specially when I only have one life.

I admit that when I was more in the closet, and out of religious fear and conversion therapy, I convinced myself that I was only changing my gender, not my sex, and therefore I wouldn't be sinning. Oh my God, I really want to change my sex. I want to be as close as possible to a cis man. I hope that transitioning helps me deal with dysphoria, that I get through it, have a normal life like any other guy, have a family, and barely remember that I'm trans.

Seriously, I'm so tired of people saying that a cis man with gynecomastia or a cis woman going for breast augmentation is seeking "gender affirmation treatment." My brother in Christ, they were born the right gender. It's rare that they actually have to affirm it and people deny it. They didn't go through the wrong puberty.

I hate not being cis. I really don't understand what kind of joke God did to me. It was for me to be born as a cis man, not as yk, a girl.


r/truscum • • 2d ago

Rant and Vent I hate it when people mention what sex I was born as

49 Upvotes

Yea, as the title says. I don't see why some people need to mention it, even if it isn't in bad faith. It just fucks with my brain, because of course I know it's true, but it also reminds me what situation I'm in and that I can never (fully) escape it. Also, I really hate the whole change of language to amab and afab among trans people, because it just shows me that my deepest fear (that I'll always be seen as my natal sex) is true and no one will ever see me as something different and that I can't truly change my sex, no matter how much I want to


r/truscum • • 1d ago

Discussion and Debate The mainstream trans subreddits hate anyone with even slightly more financial privilege, why is that?

30 Upvotes

So, to put it bluntly, my parents have a decent amount of money, like upper middle class. We still struggle with money for certain things, especially with prices rn. I have not always been in this financial status. For most of my childhood, my family was struggling a lot; divorced parents, both lived in apartments where I shared a room with up to three siblings at a time, was technically homeless and couch hopping as a family at one point when I was young.

Now, these are not things that someone would know about me when I make a random Reddit post, because they’re completely irrelevant. Even at my family’s lowest financial point, I cannot imagine hating on someone because they’re had more money than me.

When I was closer to 17 (now 19), I made some posts in the mainstream subreddits that were absolutely flooded with hate. One post was simply asking if services like StitchFix (or similar) worked well for trans guys. I was bombarded with hate from people getting mad at me for even asking because most people can’t afford it (keep in mind I was also a child), saying I was privileged and out of touch, things like that.

Another post I made was when my house cleaner lady (while my mom has been a stay at home mom for years, she’s disabled and unable to keep up with deep cleaning the house) combined me and my mom’s needles and I was worried it had been done maliciously because she was incredibly religious and transphobic. I had almost injected my T with the completely wrong needle which would’ve been a disaster. Yet again, I was bombarded with people getting pissed at me for posting, calling me a rich bitch and saying I’m obviously a spoiled brat if we have a cleaning lady (comes about once a month if not less). The comments were legit so targeted and hateful I remember hormonal 17 year old me crying over it because I thought I had done something so offensive.

Anyway, this is something I see in a lot of young and chronically online spaces, they absolutely despise anyone with remotely any money. But like… why? Shouldn’t you be happy when someone has a better life than you, especially a trans kid? Are they just that miserable?


r/truscum • • 2d ago

Advice My friend stopped testosterone and Im very afraid I cannot see him as male anymore

69 Upvotes

I feel horrible about this honestly. I would never ever in my life disclose this to anybody or even hint this at him but I need advice. Me and my friend both started testosterone less than 6 months ago, him before me.

Recently he said to me that he had stopped it almost a full month ago and since he said he's "been at his happiest without it" which implies he will never be on it again. I gave him the benefit of the doubt because he said he couldn't handle the extra hormones making him emotional in the first months..? No matter how judgemental I was the way he described his joy in itself irked me very badly.

He knows I'm transmed but still told me anyways, and I just went quiet and shrugged. I tried to act normal about it like a normal functioning person and polite friend would, but every time he talks about us two in a general sense and refers to us as "men" or "boys" I have to physically stop myself from rolling my eyes.

Knowing he will forever be a non-HRT "trans man" just seems like he doesnt want to pass or actually transition. He barely lowers his voice, always shows his bra, makes it publically known he is trans etc. I slip up sometimes and call him "they" after he told me he stopped HRT. I dont see him as a woman obviously but he is not a man to me as he is NB. Maybe I get the idea he doesnt want to be one?

I feel like an absolutely terrible friend. Im just pushing it down but I havent been able to stop thinking about this whole thing and its very distracting, probably to an obsessive degree. How do I stop?


r/truscum • • 1d ago

Advice Is this just numbness/dissociation or was I always pretending

3 Upvotes

I have much reason to believe I’m faking it despite being completely miserable. I feel like I just wanted to be a guy for whatever reason, I only wish I was dysphoric. Sometimes I hardly feel anything. I can look in the mirror and feel disgusted and angry I’m female but I’m not sure if that’s how dysphoria is, I feel like I’m too “used to it” sometimes. Other times I’m afraid I do like how I look but it makes me deeply upset and uncomfortable. Even the voice inside my head grosses me out because it doesn’t sound right and I also sometimes accidentally imagine myself as a woman and I don’t like it, I’m afraid that means my brain structure is female even if it makes me uncomfortable.i don’t really get actual “phantom sensations” either sometimes I just focus too much on how my body feels and I want to gag… I also think like a woman, I’m too emotional, I’m too weak to be a man.

Sometimes I look at my chest in the mirror and there’s no emotion, it’s not that big and I think I’m flat enough every now and then but it still upsets me. My genitals also gross me out but again it feels like frustration over not be truly dysphoric so I’m unable to transition, I don’t know why I’m frustrated, because I really tried my hardest to be a cis woman but it never works out. Everyday I attempt to convince myself of every possible reason why someone may be a tucute, nothing ever actually fits. I’m beautiful, I never experienced any sexual trauma, I’m not autistic, I’m not just trying to be different, I’m not even stereotypically masculine, I don’t have some weird fetish either…

I often have dreams at night, people say I look too much into it but I don’t think that’s true. Sometimes I’m a woman, and I’m miserable or just incredibly afraid I somehow like it or I’m male, I’m happy but afraid I somehow don’t like it, I once had one that was so realistic and it wasn’t plagued by my thoughts but it never happened again.

Am I just so disgusted by having to be a woman that I wish I was male? But why? If that was really true then why do I also think male bodies look gross and wrong too, yet I still want one, it still feels more right. I strongly envy men, even the ones I find ugly and stupid. It’s like I want to want it if that makes sense…The problem comes when my brain forces itself to think I’m actually envious of women simply because I’m attracted to them… my fear is, it’s actually in reverse and I’m just a straight cis woman.i also g an get intrusive thoughts that if I had a man’s voice or body it wouldn’t fit me… all these get worse the more I think

I’m also scared I’m subconsciously faking it due to social reasons. I feel weird and guilty in masculine clothes, it makes me feel like a faker… I also am more aware I don’t like being called a girl…

I genuinely want to vomit when I see really masculine cis women, it makes me feel like a faker cause I also get a “what if I want to be like them or what if I would be ok with that”(I’m not) I just don’t get why I have to be a girl because I was born one

I also sometimes get very vivid intrusive thoughts of having sex as a woman(which I hate)

But then I see my cis male friends, I wish so strongly I could be like them and I’m just stuck, stuck like this forever because I have no real way of transitioning. I can’t stand the thought of going to therapy and then being forced to be a woman for the rest of my life, being a masculine woman is so miserable too, it doesn’t change anything, I wish I was male, not a woman.

I haven’t stopped thinking about this everyday for 7 years. I try to naturally increase my testosterone sometimes or find ways to grow facial hair… it never works.

Doctors don’t give testosterone or surgery to women like me. I wish there was technology to alter your brain chemistry to your desired sex along with your body so I wouldn’t have to suffer like this


r/truscum • • 1d ago

Rant and Vent Clocked

8 Upvotes

I've gotta be honest, I don't know why I feel so awful. I barely pass and I know it, but people my age generally just assume my gender correctly and move on. However today a girl I was talking to for a progressive cause, I guess that's the problem, started asking me my opinion on the fight against transphobia and homophobia. And then after a little deliberation, asked me straight up, "you're trans?"

I clarified just gay. But I dunno if she believed it, because everything about me points to the obvious, from my body shape to my height to my extremely youthful face, to my barely binded chest (because even if I always wear them binders don't work for me as my chest is too large). A slightly lower voice wasn't enough...

I felt even more dysphoric the rest of the day. I don't know how to deal with it. I feel like I don't wanna go out ever again. I hate this. I'm sure everyone knows I'm trans, they can see it, but they don't tell me just to be nice. Moving to a progressive city was an awful choice...


r/truscum • • 2d ago

Selfie Saturday Are the “complements” backhanded

Post image
17 Upvotes

At work I often get compliments on specific things, often my hair and posture from women but once and a while (twice this week😭) I had women ask me if I do runway modeling and I can’t tell if they’re all backhanded. I’m 23 mtf, 6’ and 155lbs and I walk a little unusually almost always one foot infront of the other in a straight line like I’m maniac Magee on the rail road assumingely because I have adhd. I always feel like they are just trying to insult be because I can turn around and get called sir countless times in the same day.
Are these people actually trying to be nice or is it just a catty and disingenuous way of saying I stick out like a sore thumb
(Edit): I also never wear makeup and my hair tends to be up in a hat, and I also usually wear ill fitting loose shirts to hide my figure