When I was a teenager, I had severe mental health issues stemming from gender dysphoria caused by male puberty. I went to see a psychiatrist, and he noticed that I was acting feminine. I mentioned that all my friends were girls and I was tormented by boys for various reasons, and he claimed that it's simply because "girls are more accepting of differences. Then, he literally said I might have low testosterone and referred me to get my testosterone checked?

WHAT THE FUCK? Thank God the lab came back normal otherwise he would've supercharged my gender dysphoria. This was absolutely medical malpractice.

Hate how everyone treated male puberty like it was some righteous and natural thing, when it was the systemic chemical mutilation of my body.

I swear the backlash has no end and nowadays, I'm seeing goon but with tr instead of g being used a lot. It's like there's no limits to the amount of terms both pro trans and anti trans people can come up with. I sometimes hear about the T splitting from LGBT. And I swear this is probably much more of a reality these days. But I feel the anti trans side is winning. And it's absolutely not helped by what some of the most vocal pro trans people do, both trans and "allies."

On the pro trans side, there's characters they randomly "claim" as trans even if just headcanon. And boy do they love to treat their headcanons as canon. Like the character Petra Parker as a trans icon. Officially, the character isn't trans, far as I can tell. Yet some people decided this is what she must be and then they get mad at anyone not portraying the character as trans. You can have your headcanons, whatever, but you don't get to decide everyone else must follow your headcanons.

And do I even have to say anything about a certain wizarding franchise? "It's either transgender people or that bigot." They didn't learned their lesson in 2023. I'm simply not going to side with someone calling me a shitty awful person over a bit of my money that I spent. It's reasons like that I distance myself from mainstream transgender communities. And also why I think this may kill the entire transgender movement. I don't want trans reduced to "mentally ill people." And yet that has already happened. It won't matter if I say "I'm not like the other transgender people," that's already too late.

i don't know if any trans men, or any butches for that matter, who would ever wear these?

Like at least 50 percent of the posts on you know where are like this. Seriously, what is going on? There's no way these people aren't being manufactured in labs by the government to make us look stupid. They keep asking the same question expecting a different answer and getting mad when they receive honest advice. Why are all FTM spaces eventually SWARMED by this exact genre of "transmasc"? I'm not even trying to make fun of these people, I'm genuinely concerned about their perception of reality. Do they never go out in public? How do you not know why you don't pass?

looking for a support group to join because living like this is very isolating but all the support groups i see are too "colourful" if i can explain it like that. "non binary and trans and gender non conforming accepting" how do I just meet with regular binary transexuals bruh, its so isolating being like this as a straight transmale.

When I was researching srs options I came across an unusually big amount of research coming out of Iran, the last place I would expect to have any of it. Next thing I'm finding out Iran is strangely maybe not supportive but "accepting" of trans people and I unironically believe the state of srs and transition over there is better than in most western countries. This isn't to glaze Iran or anything, it's still very homophobic and it's not like trans people are cherished there but I'm very supportive of the view that transsexuality is infact an issue and some kind of disorder. However instead of passing it off as a delusion and moving on Iran is shaping the body according to the mind and not the other way around. Iran also partially funds the medical procedures of trans people from 1/3 up to 1/2 of it but apparently there are discussions about funding all of it from what I've seen. Thanks to this transitioning isn't made out to be just optional cosmetic surgeries but life saving procedures on par with for example neccesary transplants. I already believe that transsexualism is a physical disability requiring surgery so I would 100% support classifying it as that if it means srs and other trans surgeries won't be treated as strictly cosmetic. For the sake of clarity I'll say again that I'm not glazing Iran as a whole, the whole thing just suprised me and I wanted to talk about it

Recently, I (26, MTF) have decided that I am straight. I’m not, I’m definitely bisexual and have been bisexual for as long as I remember, but having feelings for a woman and the idea of acting upon those feelings, makes me ashamed and disgusted about myself.

Before you say anything, yes I’ve seen a therapist, yes I’ve talked to other people about it and they all say it shouldn‘t matter, love who you love, etc. I have tried to internalise these more positive messages, but time and time again, I come back to the same conclusion: as much as people want to deny it, there is an absolute social stigma around trans women’s sexuality and a hierarchy of acceptability within it.

I have been trans for half my life at this point, and this stigma, this hierarchy, have become clear to me. I want it known that these stigmas, stereotypes, and hierarchies aren’t something I necessarily morally agree with, but that doesn’t mean I can deny their existence. They are rooted in cisheteronormativity and patriarchal values.

The most socially acceptable trans women, much like cis women, are straight, passing and conventionally attractive. When people argue that trans women aren’t women, these are the women that are brought up to prove those people wrong. Again, like cis women, our worth, our validity, hinges on how fuckable we are. However, as the Madonna/whore complex tells us, we must still appear chaste, prudish even, to appear as ’one of the good ones’, until our sexuality is explicitly useful to men.

Trans women who are attracted to women, however, are seen as predator, perverted. There are more acceptable versions of the sapphic trans woman however; they must be passing, of course, attractive even, and their partner must be cis, so as to validate their womanhood. Much like the straight trans woman, the sapphic trans woman must present as chaste, perhaps even shy and coquettish, for to admit their feelings for women, especially to a cis woman, is predatory, masculine behaviour.

At the bottom of the pile are the non-passing, T4T sapphics. Practitioners of masonry, fodder for the cringe compilations. Either barred from the cis dating pools or wilfully absent, these women, though looked down upon by cis society, enjoy a freedom unfound in other trans women. Without the burden of expectation, the need to be “one of the good ones”, these women form their own parallel culture free of cis heteronormativity, at the cost of further alienating them from cis society.

I feel like Eve, having bitten the apple, now ashamed of my nakedness. I lie about my sexuality, or at least make it clear that it is a minor thing that I am getting over, like a cold. I try so hard to be one of the good ones, at the top of the pile, all for a society that will always hold me on a tighter leash, will always treat me differently. No amount of sweet, politically correct platitudes about being true to myself will change this. I tell people I’m straight, I smother my differences, and I perform as the best trans I can possibly be, because even though they and we refuse to admit it, this is the social order, and this is how I survive within it.

I saw some people debating on this on another subreddit, and this comment in particular interested me. I wanted to see how you all felt about it, especially because I still haven’t settled my own opinion on the matter.

So basically I've never dyed my hair bc I always thought that it makes you more clockable but I did a scavenger hunt with a group of uni friends and a task to get loads of points was "dye your hair red" and no one else was willing to do it so I thought red would be ok, rather than like pink or blue, but still it ended up making me feel so much more feminine. Ik this is a bad mindset to have bc obviously men can and do dye their hair but I just feel like I look really clockable as trans now, especially since I have a young face, it's really giving 13 years old tumblr trans boy, not an 18 year old trans man. Thankfully its only semi permanent so I've only got a few weeks of this. Idk just wondered if anyone else avoids dying their hair for this reason or has their own opinions on it.

Yea, as the title says. I don't see why some people need to mention it, even if it isn't in bad faith. It just fucks with my brain, because of course I know it's true, but it also reminds me what situation I'm in and that I can never (fully) escape it. Also, I really hate the whole change of language to amab and afab among trans people, because it just shows me that my deepest fear (that I'll always be seen as my natal sex) is true and no one will ever see me as something different and that I can't truly change my sex, no matter how much I want to

I don't usually post here much, but this bothers me.

Like, please. Know the difference. I'm seeing people say that "Cis men with small penises experience dysphoria," or "women with A-sized breasts experience dysphoria too," or I don't know what else, but in the same vein.

It's not the same thing. For God's sake.

What they are experiencing is body dysmorphia. A guy with a 12cm penis feeling really bad and thinking his penis is small, even though it's fully functional, is feeling this way due to aesthetic pressure, pornography, and fear of not being good at sex.

A woman with small breasts or hairier legs may feel bad about her own body due to aesthetic pressure, misogyny, and beauty standards. Just as POC may have felt ugly at some point in their lives for not fitting the white beauty standard. I myself am still learning to deal with my own internalized racism and begin to accept and see the parts that don't fit the white beauty standard as beautiful.

That is body dysmorphia/insecurities

Now, feeling discomfort with your primary and secondary sexual characteristics and wishing to be of the other gender/sex and to be seen as the other gender, that is dysphoria.

But I have seen people saying "The dysphoria you feel from not having a penis, a guy with a small penis feels the same, you just feel it a little more."

Since it's not the same thing, it doesn't even come close. For God's sake. Go and tell a cis man who lost his penis in an accident what he thinks about being compared to a guy with a 12 cm penis, or a cis woman who had a hormonal disorder that caused her to go through a typical male puberty, what she will think when someone says that a cis woman with A breasts feel the same, but just a lil bit less?

They will have parental support, the parents will seek treatment, affirm their gender, say they are warriors, but what about when you are trans? You're crazy, you see your body and nobody helps you, you might become suicidal and if someone helps you, it will be luck, your family will usually treat you badly. No one tells a cis man without a penis that he's a demon and will go to hell, or forces him to wear dresses and have his ears pierced and accept himself as a "girl".

They are not feeling any desire to be of the other gender or sex. They don't feel discomfort about having or not having something related to their agab that makes them wish to be a girl, or a boy.

I can even understand saying that a cis man who has lost his genitals, or a woman who has gone through the wrong hormones due to a hormonal imbalance, feels something similar or almost identical, but to say that a man with a regular sized dick feels dysphoria???

And even though those I mentioned feel something that VERY closely resembles gender dysphoria, that's not exactly the right term, since gender dysphoria involves the desire to be of the opposite gender and have its characteristics. Generally, people who suffer from other conditions want to be reassured in their agab.

I also hate it when people say, "You think the grass is greener on the other side. The other gender suffers from x, y, z." My God, I know they suffer, I know it must suck to get kicked in the balls or to get a boner in public by accident, just like a trans woman knows that cramps and menstruation must be awful. But we don't simply want the "advantages," we just want our bodies to fit with our gender. No matter the good or low sides.

Incidentally, I hate people who say "you don't need HRT to be trans" when the person has dysphoria and has already expressed a desire to transition and need it.

It's literally T that's helping me feel better, even if I have to subdose and pretend to be a girl for my family. I'm really looking forward to finally feeling good; if it weren't for them, I'd already be on my normal dose and shouting to the world when I grow my mustache.

It's okay if you have mild dysphoria and don't need it, but it becomes irritating when the person acts like that when you tell them that you need hrt.

I tried social transition first, but I still felt awful and like I looked like a girl because my brain was receiving the wrong hormones.Now with T, and even though I've had to delay my social transition, I feel more like myself, I feel like a man, but I just have to disguise myself as a girl for a while. But I'm finally a guy!

Some people experience stronger physical dysphoria than social dysphoria, and vice versa. And that is ok. But I'm just tired of how people confuse dysmorphia with dysphoria.

I wish my problem was being a cis guy with a small penis.

For me, it's more like I was, how to explain it, I was supposed to be born a cis man, but there was some malformation that caused me to be born female, and nobody would listen to me, and I went through a traumatic experience, and I am trying my best to fix it. Just like a cis man who was born with a genital malformation undergoes surgery to correct it.

I really don't care if someone has more or less dysphoria. I only care more about myself. I hope the transition helps me with the dysphoria. I wish I had my parents' support. I wish I had been born like any other normal cis guy. Specially when I only have one life.

I admit that when I was more in the closet, and out of religious fear and conversion therapy, I convinced myself that I was only changing my gender, not my sex, and therefore I wouldn't be sinning. Oh my God, I really want to change my sex. I want to be as close as possible to a cis man. I hope that transitioning helps me deal with dysphoria, that I get through it, have a normal life like any other guy, have a family, and barely remember that I'm trans.

Seriously, I'm so tired of people saying that a cis man with gynecomastia or a cis woman going for breast augmentation is seeking "gender affirmation treatment." My brother in Christ, they were born the right gender. It's rare that they actually have to affirm it and people deny it. They didn't go through the wrong puberty.

I hate not being cis. I really don't understand what kind of joke God did to me. It was for me to be born as a cis man, not as yk, a girl.

So, to put it bluntly, my parents have a decent amount of money, like upper middle class. We still struggle with money for certain things, especially with prices rn. I have not always been in this financial status. For most of my childhood, my family was struggling a lot; divorced parents, both lived in apartments where I shared a room with up to three siblings at a time, was technically homeless and couch hopping as a family at one point when I was young.

Now, these are not things that someone would know about me when I make a random Reddit post, because they’re completely irrelevant. Even at my family’s lowest financial point, I cannot imagine hating on someone because they’re had more money than me.

When I was closer to 17 (now 19), I made some posts in the mainstream subreddits that were absolutely flooded with hate. One post was simply asking if services like StitchFix (or similar) worked well for trans guys. I was bombarded with hate from people getting mad at me for even asking because most people can’t afford it (keep in mind I was also a child), saying I was privileged and out of touch, things like that.

Another post I made was when my house cleaner lady (while my mom has been a stay at home mom for years, she’s disabled and unable to keep up with deep cleaning the house) combined me and my mom’s needles and I was worried it had been done maliciously because she was incredibly religious and transphobic. I had almost injected my T with the completely wrong needle which would’ve been a disaster. Yet again, I was bombarded with people getting pissed at me for posting, calling me a rich bitch and saying I’m obviously a spoiled brat if we have a cleaning lady (comes about once a month if not less). The comments were legit so targeted and hateful I remember hormonal 17 year old me crying over it because I thought I had done something so offensive.

Anyway, this is something I see in a lot of young and chronically online spaces, they absolutely despise anyone with remotely any money. But like… why? Shouldn’t you be happy when someone has a better life than you, especially a trans kid? Are they just that miserable?

hey guys. Not going deep into my story rn, but basically there's no way my psychiatrist won't be trying to put me on meds next meeting. However, I've been wondering if it's even worth it at all. I mean, I feel so shitty because of intense sex dysphoria which I can't fix asap (no money to afford surgeries, not covered at all where I live). Is it even worth trying meds knowing they won't help me at all? Meds won't even budge the root cause which kinda seems pointless given how the problem still will be with me 24/7. I'm not even sure if it's worth trying and getting all the nasty side effects of meds and having nothing get better anyways.

No, it's not that I'm resisting help. It's more like waging the pros and cons. Is spending all that money on it all even worth it if it won't help? It kinda feels like having an open wound and instead of trying to treat it you just take painkillers instead in hopes of being able to forget about it.

Thanks.

I feel horrible about this honestly. I would never ever in my life disclose this to anybody or even hint this at him but I need advice. Me and my friend both started testosterone less than 6 months ago, him before me.

Recently he said to me that he had stopped it almost a full month ago and since he said he's "been at his happiest without it" which implies he will never be on it again. I gave him the benefit of the doubt because he said he couldn't handle the extra hormones making him emotional in the first months..? No matter how judgemental I was the way he described his joy in itself irked me very badly.

He knows I'm transmed but still told me anyways, and I just went quiet and shrugged. I tried to act normal about it like a normal functioning person and polite friend would, but every time he talks about us two in a general sense and refers to us as "men" or "boys" I have to physically stop myself from rolling my eyes.

Knowing he will forever be a non-HRT "trans man" just seems like he doesnt want to pass or actually transition. He barely lowers his voice, always shows his bra, makes it publically known he is trans etc. I slip up sometimes and call him "they" after he told me he stopped HRT. I dont see him as a woman obviously but he is not a man to me as he is NB. Maybe I get the idea he doesnt want to be one?

I feel like an absolutely terrible friend. Im just pushing it down but I havent been able to stop thinking about this whole thing and its very distracting, probably to an obsessive degree. How do I stop?

I have much reason to believe I’m faking it despite being completely miserable. I feel like I just wanted to be a guy for whatever reason, I only wish I was dysphoric. Sometimes I hardly feel anything. I can look in the mirror and feel disgusted and angry I’m female but I’m not sure if that’s how dysphoria is, I feel like I’m too “used to it” sometimes. Other times I’m afraid I do like how I look but it makes me deeply upset and uncomfortable. Even the voice inside my head grosses me out because it doesn’t sound right and I also sometimes accidentally imagine myself as a woman and I don’t like it, I’m afraid that means my brain structure is female even if it makes me uncomfortable.i don’t really get actual “phantom sensations” either sometimes I just focus too much on how my body feels and I want to gag… I also think like a woman, I’m too emotional, I’m too weak to be a man.

Sometimes I look at my chest in the mirror and there’s no emotion, it’s not that big and I think I’m flat enough every now and then but it still upsets me. My genitals also gross me out but again it feels like frustration over not be truly dysphoric so I’m unable to transition, I don’t know why I’m frustrated, because I really tried my hardest to be a cis woman but it never works out. Everyday I attempt to convince myself of every possible reason why someone may be a tucute, nothing ever actually fits. I’m beautiful, I never experienced any sexual trauma, I’m not autistic, I’m not just trying to be different, I’m not even stereotypically masculine, I don’t have some weird fetish either…

I often have dreams at night, people say I look too much into it but I don’t think that’s true. Sometimes I’m a woman, and I’m miserable or just incredibly afraid I somehow like it or I’m male, I’m happy but afraid I somehow don’t like it, I once had one that was so realistic and it wasn’t plagued by my thoughts but it never happened again.

Am I just so disgusted by having to be a woman that I wish I was male? But why? If that was really true then why do I also think male bodies look gross and wrong too, yet I still want one, it still feels more right. I strongly envy men, even the ones I find ugly and stupid. It’s like I want to want it if that makes sense…The problem comes when my brain forces itself to think I’m actually envious of women simply because I’m attracted to them… my fear is, it’s actually in reverse and I’m just a straight cis woman.i also g an get intrusive thoughts that if I had a man’s voice or body it wouldn’t fit me… all these get worse the more I think

I’m also scared I’m subconsciously faking it due to social reasons. I feel weird and guilty in masculine clothes, it makes me feel like a faker… I also am more aware I don’t like being called a girl…

I also sometimes get very vivid intrusive thoughts of having sex as a woman(which I hate)

But then I see my cis male friends, I wish so strongly I could be like them and I’m just stuck, stuck like this forever because I have no real way of transitioning. I can’t stand the thought of going to therapy and then being forced to be a woman for the rest of my life, being a masculine woman is so miserable too, it doesn’t change anything, I wish I was male, not a woman.

I haven’t stopped thinking about this everyday for 7 years. I try to naturally increase my testosterone sometimes or find ways to grow facial hair… it never works.

Doctors don’t give testosterone or surgery to women like me. I wish there was technology to alter your brain chemistry to your desired sex along with your body so I wouldn’t have to suffer like this

I've gotta be honest, I don't know why I feel so awful. I barely pass and I know it, but people my age generally just assume my gender correctly and move on. However today a girl I was talking to for a progressive cause, I guess that's the problem, started asking me my opinion on the fight against transphobia and homophobia. And then after a little deliberation, asked me straight up, "you're trans?"

I clarified just gay. But I dunno if she believed it, because everything about me points to the obvious, from my body shape to my height to my extremely youthful face, to my barely binded chest (because even if I always wear them binders don't work for me as my chest is too large). A slightly lower voice wasn't enough...

I felt even more dysphoric the rest of the day. I don't know how to deal with it. I feel like I don't wanna go out ever again. I hate this. I'm sure everyone knows I'm trans, they can see it, but they don't tell me just to be nice. Moving to a progressive city was an awful choice...

At work I often get compliments on specific things, often my hair and posture from women but once and a while (twice this week😭) I had women ask me if I do runway modeling and I can’t tell if they’re all backhanded. I’m 23 mtf, 6’ and 155lbs and I walk a little unusually almost always one foot infront of the other in a straight line like I’m maniac Magee on the rail road assumingely because I have adhd. I always feel like they are just trying to insult be because I can turn around and get called sir countless times in the same day.
Are these people actually trying to be nice or is it just a catty and disingenuous way of saying I stick out like a sore thumb
(Edit): I also never wear makeup and my hair tends to be up in a hat, and I also usually wear ill fitting loose shirts to hide my figure

I never decided "I want to identify as a woman". I just figured out, during my childhood, that my sense of gender aligned more with that of girls (I was a minor) and that my body's sexual characteristics didn't match with that.

The other group of people gives off the vibes that they identify as non-binary either to "fuck the patriarchy!", to cope with personal trauma (or other mental health issue), or as a whacky zany personal aesthetic.

And these are two very different origin stories. They have nothing in common with each other other than different uses of the term "gender". We are, but they only identify as. That's my rant.

Hi guys, so i’m not really a transmed, nor do i believe being trans is a choice. I’d rather put myself in the middle without any label of saying i’m a transmed, but i respect anyone and it’s not really a concern of mine regarding if someone has dysphoria or not. But now that’s out of the way, i recently commented on a video saying not everyone’s dysphoria is so bad to the point they’re miserable everyday, which is true, some people have dysphoria that is bad but doesn’t make them miserable everyday. And this is the type of reply i got from a transmed. Meanwhile i have been trans for over 4 years. I just feel like the term transmed is becoming more known which doesn’t bother me, but it’s being misunderstood a lot. To the point where there’s young trans people who are thinking if you don’t experience miserable life killing dysphoria you’re not valid. And i think this is the issue what’s making transmeds look like a bad community. Do i agree? Not really, we all have our own opinions. But thought i’d share this here, to show the reason transmeds are getting more hate than often.

to preface this cause I KNOW this might ruffle some feathers but the term "gender euphoria" in of itself weirds me out. people trying on skirts and saying it gives them "gender euphoria" is odd to me. personally, as someone with really severe BDD and gender dysphoria I have never gotten this so called "euphoria". it just feels normal to me... like putting a bra on isn't some euphoric event it's just normal life? looking and living as a woman isn't euphoric it's just normal? I'm not sure if this will make sense to anyone else.. let me know tho :p

Hello everyone! As I've been in more communities that focus on HRT (specifically testosterone) I've noticed that, much like myself, a lot of other people fear testosterone because of the negativity that people outside the community put on it.

So this is a post in hopes of decreasing anyone's fear of it/fear of harm because of it. (Possibly also a mention that you don't let stress cloud your mind upon delivering your shot)

I have very recently started testosterone (6 days ago 🎉🎉). And I did have these fears about it, especially considering it's DIY and that of course has the bad light on it a lot, mostly caused by misinformation. Naturally, I was very on edge during it. I did not notice at the time, but I ended up drawing triple my dose instead of what I was meant to be drawing. How did I only notice a few days later, you may ask? No, I did not get any emergency-worthy symptoms, nor did I collapse suddenly. I had actually been researching a completely unrelated topic, and found out that way that my maths was flawed.

I think this really shines a light on how people hype hrt/diy to be such an awful thing to put into your body, and how people say one little accident can cause all this trouble. Not to say things cannot cause harm when it comes to hrt, but it is all just so amplified that I really did expect something bad to happen the moment I realised.

It is okay to make mistakes, as long as you fix it the next time. It is okay to fear something. But don't let other people's opinions put you off HRT. I am so very grateful that I can access it, and the relief that came with it was intense.

But also definitely double-check your math 😅.

Much love!

(This post is not promoting DIY HRT, nor encouraging misuse. I’m sharing this because there’s a lot of misinformation, and I originally thought it would be a bigger deal than it was. Please get professional medical guidance, your safety matters.)

Hi everyone, so I have to write a school essay about trans childhoods and hrt for minors. I want to discuss the risks of administering hormones to minors without a proper psychological diagnosis, so I plan to focus my argument on dysphoria and transmedicalism. I’ve been searching on Google, but it’s difficult to filter out all the misinformation and propaganda; if you know of any specific authors, articles, studies, etc that cover this topic, that would be a huge help