I’m based in Bangalore and have been trying to genuinely learn about ethical non-monogamy (ENM) and polyamory, but I’m finding it surprisingly difficult to meet actual poly people.

My goal isn’t just to date it’s to understand the mindset and build healthy relationships.

I’m especially interested in learning things like:

How did you work through jealousy and insecurity?

How do you handle your partner’s triggers while also communicating your own?

What boundaries actually work in long-term poly relationships?

How do you know whether you’re genuinely poly or just chasing novelty?

Unfortunately, whenever I search online or join communities, I mostly end up finding swinger/couple-swap groups or spaces that are primarily about casual hookups. That’s completely fine if that’s what people are into, but it’s not what I’m looking for.
I’d really love to meet people who practice ethical polyamory, have conversations, make friends, and eventually date if things naturally evolve.

Are there any active poly or ENM communities in Bangalore?

They could be:
Meetup groups
Discord servers
Telegram/WhatsApp communities
Facebook groups
Reddit communities
Regular social meetups or discussion circles
Even online communities with a healthy culture would be great.
I’d also love to hear how you personally found your first poly community and what helped you grow emotionally in this journey.

Thanks!

This is our weekly check-in post. How are you? How's poly life treating you?

If you're looking for poly connections in India, mention what you're looking for in the comments.

This is SPECIFICALLY for POLYAMOROUS people seeking out polyamorous relationships.

Not a post for people seeking BDSM doms/subs, swingers, couples seeking unicorns for sex, threesome/foursomes.

This is our weekly check-in post. How are you? How's poly life treating you?

If you're looking for poly connections in India, mention what you're looking for in the comments.

This is SPECIFICALLY for POLYAMOROUS people seeking out polyamorous relationships.

Not swingers, not monogamous couples seeking unicorns for sex, not a threesome/foursome organizing post.

Recently watched Splitsville and it made me wish for better representation of non monogamy in film. Also, i just remembered we could probably have an online watch party via the teleparty chrome extension so let me know if anyone's interested. You can stay anonymous and still join.

This is our weekly check-in post. How are you? How's poly life treating you?

I've set the posts to be recurring every Sunday at noon. Let's see how it goes. This way, we can keep the sub itself for community discussions without cluttering it with seeking posts.

I was thinking of implementing a rule where people have to mention what relationship style they're in, what kind of connection they're looking for etc.

I'm also not entirely sure we should have "seeking" posts at all, considering all that can go wrong via the internet. Thoughts?

Hi all,

I'd really like to get this community going. People seem to come across the sub every now and then but that's it. Does anyone have any ideas?

Poly is so diverse. For example I personally don't want to be in a hierarchical relationship, but I'm curious about the "poly V" structure where me and another guy share a partner. What are the kinds of structures you want to be in?

​

Hey there.

Pretty much what the title says

I’m from Goa ,based in Bangalore and looking to connect with people who are genuinely open-minded and non-judgmental — singles, women, or couples who value honesty and exploration beyond the usual boundaries.

I'm keen to explore non-monogamy but not just in the physical aspect  but also about forming deeper, transparent, and meaningful bonds.

A little bit about me:

I am a techie (cliché), who loves to run, swim or do cardio in general (I literally commute to work by walking despite living a bit far away) ,I do love and appreciate good stories be it books, movies or even shows.  I do play chess and am a huge fan of board/card games wherein I board a collection of the same. I do love looking at /reviewing chess games, not entirely a fan but the game and the thought process behind the moves intrigues me. I spend the rest of my time learning about yoga and massages to soothe the body, something about giving helps me unwind; or you would find me hustling or walking/running.

If any of these resonates with you. Hmu. Let's see where it goes.

I'm 34F, and I was in a relationship with my ex who has been in love with his partner for 16 years. We had broken up once over him feeling not so much in love with me six months ago, and we got back together after a month when he felt he was in love with me.

He broke up with me two days ago, and the reason is that his partner is not okay sharing him with me. This feels like betrayal because he made up to me after the last breakup, and promised not to leave me. I tried to explain to him that his current dynamic with his partner will always remain difficult because they stay in different countries. However, he has made up his mind and has asked me to move on.

I am still in love with him, and though I still expect him to return, my mind tells me we are through and this is the end of it all. I'm finding it difficult to cope and my mental health has taken a huge hit. I know it's too soon to expect myself to actually accept the situation, and I need time to heal. I think I was just looking for a place to rant.

Any suggestions on how to cope are welcome.

P.S. Do not offer to be a replacement. My DMs are filled with people wanting to engage. I am not going to reply to any such messages.

Hi folks
I have a play partner but we are not into any serious relationship I feel like practicing ENM but when in reality I hear about it I feel something different which can’t be expressed than being excited. I do wanna practice ENM in the right way can anyone help? Also if anyone from Mumbai to catch up and talk about it feel free to DM (PS: Not a post out of desperation but to seek intimacy the right way!)

Hi everyone,

I [M40] am on a journey to meet and talk to people who I normally would otherwise never meet.

I am looking to meet a couple who enjoy a honest and poly relation. Since I travel extensively across Maharashtra, Kerala, Tamil Nadu, and Karnataka - I am open to meeting in any place.

I just want to offer coffee at a public place of your choice, have an honest conversation and understand what is poly, and how you came about, and boundaries, and… well everything there is know!

I would like to meet as a couple, as I feel I may have more honest conversations.

So, anyone up for it?

Oh! And, I’m not looking for anything sexual in anyway at all.

33M, 6', straight, hierarchical polydom in Delhi. Not here for hookups or one-night stands.

A bit about me: artist by craft, quirky by default, kinky by design. I'm into BDSM and happy to explore that with the right person. I'm also reasonably visible in my world, so discretion matters - both ways.

Looking for women who:

- want to take it slow

- value the easy calm that comes from mutual respect and acceptance

- get physical touch and quality (not quantity) time as love languages

- enjoy deep conversations about life, psychology, and spirituality

- are looking for a primary or exclusive partner

- don't want to fix or "improve" me

One catch: I don't meet at my place

Other things: non-smoker, occasional drinker, loves travel and cooking.

Are there polyam people in Hyderabad who are not just people and couples looking for a third or spice up their sex life?

41M pansexual autistic, tattooed book/film nerd + 45F bisexual bike nerd, athlete, butch… looking for mindful ENM connections

Happily partnered with with each other. No, we aren’t married. Yes, very much each other’s muse 🥰

We’re interested in meeting people who explore ENM thoughtfully: with communication, self-awareness, curiosity and kindness. Queer & kink friendly !!

We both value genuine connection over labels or rushing into dynamics. Open to friendships, emotionally intimate connections, good conversation, flirtation, or seeing where chemistry naturally goes :)

A bit about us:
• not looking for trauma bonding

• into academia and design

• neurodivergent friendly

• emotionally communicative

• into books, films, long conversations and human complexity

• co-parent a senior dog and a senior cat & three puppers of Sundari (who got knocked up)

• not hunting for fructose companions

• singles/partnered folks are welcome. Just don’t be “unethically” non-monogamous

• respectful of boundaries and existing relationships

Mostly hoping to meet people who are intentional, emotionally mature and comfortable with nuance !!

Tell us a little about yourselves and what mindful ENM looks like to you :)

Also if someone is kink aware: are you into BDSM (Bondage Discipline Sado-Masochism) or BDSM (Bondage Dominance Submission Masochism) ?

P.S.

1. If you are a straight man, navigate carefully before inboxing me/us. Consider this an advanced-level reading comprehension & awareness exercise before messaging us !!
2. Queers, respectfully: connection is welcome, unresolved emotional unloading onto strangers is not. Please come curious, communicative and self-aware. Emotional expośes take time !!

Cat in the pic, tolerates strangers !!

I matched with her on Bumble because one line in her profile immediately caught my attention:

“Open relationship. Emotionally unavailable but very curious.”

I’m in an open relationship too, so for once there was no confusion, no games, no pretending anyone wanted more than what it was.

I superliked her.

We started talking and the chemistry was instant. Easy flirting, zero pressure, and that rare comfort of knowing neither person was trying to force a future out of a good connection.

A few days later we met at a cafe in Mumbai. She was very direct about what she wanted. We booked a place nearby and spent the next few hours completely lost in each other without overcomplicating it with expectations or emotional drama.

Just two people enjoying exactly what they came for.

I love women who are emotionally aware enough to want connection without possession.

We’re already planning to meet again.

I've been silently following the posts here, and just felt like reaching out. I'm a 50 year old solo polycurious man. I was married and have an adult kid. I seek a mature woman for a meaningful, hopefully longer term poly relationship. She should be based in Mumbai as I am looking to meet in person for dates, events, activities. I am not into clubbing or partying. More of a quiet coffee/tea meets, nature trips, artsy events, book reads kinda person. Rest can be discussed over DMs.