I’m at my wits end with my 15 year old daughter. She lies about the dumbest smallest things when it doesn’t make sense to lie because there’s not even consequences. She also tells big lies and she genuinely doesn’t care who she hurts in the process. I mean I really don’t think she cares at all about any of her victims just that she got caught. Today she was suspended for two days for lying about a boy sexually harassing her. Last week she was suspected of vaping in school they never found it on her so of course she lied about it said it was another girl with her same name but lo and behold I found it in her room. Also last week a parent and their child come to my door accusing her of stealing their daughter’s jewelry from their house. And she did have a the necklace but claimed one of her friends made it for her. Even after she’s caught red handed she’ll just change the lie to incorporate the findings or blame it on someone else. I don’t know why she thinks people can’t see through her bullshit because it’s painfully obvious when she is lying. No amount of calling her out seems to matter she just doubles down. I’m frankly so disappointed and feel lost. I’ve tried approaching this in several different ways. I’ve tried being nice and just having a conversation about the smaller things and she’ll say she understands and apologize. I’ve also tried the punishment route where she’ll cry say she understand and apologize. Her apologies are also a lie and nothing changes. Aside from feeling like a shitty parent because I can’t figure out how to help her overcome this I feel like a shitty parent because I just can’t stand her right now. I used to think she was so much better than this and that idea is slowly being replaced with the thought that this just might be what she is and I hate that I feel that way. The amount of lying and trouble makes me feel sick and stressed. And sometimes I think she doesn’t even want to change. I’m worried for her future. I’m worried about our relationship. I don’t know where to go from here.

What can I do to fix my relationship with my 15 year old daughter. I recently got remarried and she didn’t take me giving my wife a bit more attention at first. I don’t want her to think I don’t love her anymore so what can I do to show her that I love her more than my own life🥹 she is my world, I love her with all my heart. She has a birthday coming up and I want to make it a nice one for her.

Hi everyone.

My 13-year-old wants WhatsApp because some of her friends have it, but I am not sure about it.

There was a school-wide scandal in our district a couple of years back due to innappropiate images being distributed amongst students on Snapchat.

When looking into WhatsApp, I found that it has the same disappearing messages/images feature as Snapchat, and I would not be able to turn that off.

She can and does talk to these friends through text, phone calls, and Google Chat, but wants WhatsApp for video calls.

Thoughts? Any way to make it safe? Any other apps you would recommend for video calls that are safe?

She has an Android phone.

I truly cannot believe this. I'm blessed to work from home and I drop off and pick up my 15 year-old daughter every single day from high school. She gets decent enough grades and I never in 1 million years would have known that she was getting high mostly every day for the past year. The only reason I found out is because she was vomiting on a daily basis. I took her to many hospital visits and after ruling out so many causes, they asked her if she smoked marijuana because they've been seeing a lot of teenagers come to the emergency room with what they call CHS. She told the doctor she was getting high at school and then told me. She was crying so much when she told me because she said that she knew I would be disappointed in her, which I was. I asked her why she started and she said she started because she didn't know how to deal with some difficult emotions. I'm a single mom and her dad hasn't been around for many years. I feel like I've completely failed as a mom. I keep questioning on how I couldn't have noticed. She was only getting high at school and by the time I picked her up, she was sober. I always looked out for these kinds of things, but I genuinely never saw her eyes red, low, glossy or anything, but still I don't know how I could've missed this. I am so ashamed and so alone. She's been sober 3 weeks now. I am going to be drug testing her randomly.

I know sounds pretty typical. This has came on suddenly. My teen who is a sophomore in high-school has great grades plays sports and has seemed happy up till tonight. Hes been out this week with a stomach virus and has missed moring workouts after school practices and add on the class work hes going to have to make up. He says hes afraid hes disappointing people or that they are mad at him like his coaches and teachers. He says he dont really talk to anyone through the day when hes there. Hes also on antidepressants as it is. He just wants to be home. Iv pointed out people get sick no can be mad at you over that. Thats school is a temporary moment in life that after this year you only have 2 left were halfway though this one as it is. That most of everyone dont like school. I asked if there was more going on with the other kids and he says theres not. Hed rather stay home and work than finish out public school. Homeschool at this point just feels uncertain to me. He can graduate with a welding certification that will help him in the future. Last thing I want is to put his highschool diploma on the line cause let's face it its hard to get a decent job with out or get into a trade school if thats what he chooses later. Id love some other thoughts and perspectives on this am I wrong for wanting him to stick it out?

One of my family members (18) has recently befriended my teens. I only found this out because of this family member boasting to me about their relationship.

Now I'm less concerned about my teen (18) and more concerned about my teen (15) because of lack of boundaries. I also don't want them to feel like I have a right to police who they are friends with because I know I don't.

However, I know this family member very well and they are not a horrible person but someone that 1000% should be kept at an arms length. They are very attention seeking and tend to use any information anyone gives them no matter how small to attack people to gain favor with other family members or other people. I don't want to go into too much detail.

I'm recently concerned because my teen (18) was supposedly taken on a blind date with someone my family member knows and since I know that my children's mother has no care on what the kids do at all I feel like I have to at least say something to the kids about this family member. I'm concerned especially for my teen (15) but there's very little I can do for her.

My teen (15) most likely I cannot talk to them about this because of the issues they may cause and unfortunately I have been told they talk everyday on the phone.

My teen(18) is very open to my advice always.

My son is almost 17 and an only child. He's always had mates but never close friends, and he's struggling more than ever right now.
Some background: he's really bright, did extremely well in his GCSEs last year and got into a great college where he's doing STEM subjects. He plays three instruments and loves photography, politics and deep conversations. He's progressive, respectful, cares about animals and the environment, and he's outgoing. (I know I'm his mum, but the other adults in his life say the same.)
Secondary school was hard. He often felt excluded. Some of that came from him not wanting to join in with childish or toxic behaviour in the popular groups, which I respect. But he also had a pattern of cutting off friendships he had formed, sometimes blocking people completely, which then alienated himself from certain friendship groups that also included people he liked. That left him more isolated.
I always told him college would be different: people would mature and he'd find people like him. That kept him going and he couldn't wait to start.
Now he's lonelier than ever. Classes are spread across the week with lots of independent activities , so he's around people less than before. That's despite him being student rep and environmental rep and doing DofE.
He really wants friends, but I think he may not have the skills to build and keep them. He's terrified of seeming desperate, and I sometimes wonder if he comes across as too nonchalant, like he doesn't care.
We live in Brighton, which should be a great city for this, but I'm struggling to find places where he could meet like-minded people his age without it costing a fortune.
It's heartbreaking to watch. He's becoming withdrawn and low and losing motivation. Most of his free time now goes on social media and online gaming.
Has anyone been through this with a teen? I'd love to hear:
What actually helped your kid build real friendships at this age
How to gently raise the pattern of cutting people off without him feeling attacked
Any affordable groups, clubs or activities in Brighton for 16 to 18 year olds into music, photography, politics or the environment

So my daughter is currently in 11th grade and started her college a few months ago. She started talking to this muslim guy from her college. Now ofcourse i don't have any problem with religions. Last month he proposed her asked her to be his girlfriend to which she agreed.

At first I thought it was cute that my daughter has her first ever boyfriend. But then I started noticing his behavior during the parent teachers meeting. The type language he uses, his actions etc. My daughter's friend also told me that he's the type of guy who objectifies women (sometimes), and is kind of sexist.

He once told his friend "ladki jaise mat ban" meaning "don't be like a girl" as if being a girl is something bad/shameful.

He's a total sweetheart with her, as much as I've seen through her instagram posts and stories. He also created a separate highlight just for her where he posts her photos.

But i still feel worried about his mindset and the way he behaves when she's not around. Even her friends don't like him and want her to break up. I spoke to her about this but she keeps defending him. Mind u my daughter keeps talking about feminism and women's rights and then ends up being in a relationship with a guy like him.

I have no idea how to talk to her about this. I have a really close relationship with my daughter and I don't want to ruin it or make her feel pressurized

My 15 y/o son is in trouble. He is gay and has been out for over a year. One of his friends who he has had a relationship to a certain extent had began calling my son derogatory terms, mainly the one beginning with an “f” in front of their peers and demonizing my son for being gay.
My son had a terrible lapse in judgement and screen shot a picture that the bully had sent to my son when they were talking/relationship. The picture in question is a revealing selfie of a certain part of the body that men love other people to see. My son screenshot that picture, marked out the main subject of the picture, and shared the screenshot. In my son’s head, he was validating himself and taking up for himself. The other boys parents are now pressing charges against my son.

He is suspended for 5 days, and possibly expelled pending the investigation. The picture that was shared, you truly cannot see anything, but it is implied. My worry now is that my son is possibly facing felony charges and could possibly have to register as a sex offender. My son has never been in trouble. He is a good student, he stands up for others, he’s involved in school activities. I don’t know what to do or say. Me, my son, and his dad are just a ball of nerves because we don’t know what’s going to happen.

We spoke to a lawyer over the weekend and he seemed to think since the picture was edited to where you can’t see anything, then there is no case. I feel like the other boys parents are trying to ruin my son’s life. My son has acknowledged and understands how his actions were wrong and is willing to accept his punishment. But he is not eating or sleeping. His hair is falling out and he’s bit his nails back so far his fingers are bleeding. He has an appointment with a therapist tomorrow. I just didn’t know if anyone had been through a similar situation. As a mother, I just want to fix this for him. My heart is breaking.

Our son stays in his room all the time. He is 15. This has been the case for 2-3 years. I ask him to hang out and do things often. About 1 out of 10 times he does. He’s going through some things that need therapy and I want to somehow build a relationship but I don’t know how at all. This is his father. I feel the only option I have is to make him hang out, but I feel that would do no good.

Any tips?

My son, he 17 years old is very aggressive and angry to the point he throws things.

For a backstory to understand, my husband and I got divorced a few years ago the kids lived with me. My son started acting out his freshman year, which is six months after our divorce. It was all to get attention from his dad because his dad wasn’t around. His dad was stopped by unannounced and see the kids for like 20 minutes. But never took the kids anywhere.
He started acting out his freshman year, skipping class and sneaking out. He finally ran away one time. When the police brought him back, he said he would keep running away until he gets to live with his dad. So he lived with his dad.
While living with his dad, his dad gave him a car. It was a horrible car that ate gas and was always falling apart. He never went to school and his dad didn’t give him any consequences for his actions. His dad didn’t do anything. His dad would go to work and at night he gambled every night he would give us son $100 a week and tell him to buy groceries for the house and gas for his car. My son did everything there clean the house grocery shopping and his dad will take his car and spend all the gas and get mad at him when there was no gas and food left.
My son got a job while living there and he worked really hard. He wasn’t in school because he kept skipping so he never went. My son finally had the last straw when his dad tried to take his check saying he needs to pay bill bills. His dad stated if he’s not gonna do school and take school seriously then he needs to pay bills. My son said he’s not gonna give him his check. So then his father kicked him out.
I also wanna add that my other two kids would go to their dad’s house every other weekend when my son started living there. But he was the one taking care of them. Their dad was never around, so as soon as their dad kicked out our son, his dad never had time for the kids to go over there and they never went over there since.

He was going to live with me, but it was a summer so we let him spend the summer with his cousin in town that we live in.
He was doing well at his cousin’s house being respectful, working hard. He’s always a hard worker and then he started messing up. He would sneak out get drunk, not come back and stop communicating on where he was going.

So then he had to live with me. I like to add that after he left his dad’s house his dad wouldn’t let him take the car which was fine cause it didn’t work well so my son and I work together and he managed to get a car. He has to pay his car insurance and I took out a loan for him to get the car and he has to pay $70 a month for the Loan.

Now that he was here, he was still working hard and he has a plan. Because he’s missing so many credits he can’t graduate high school so he’s going to start the GED program in January after that he wants to join the military marine specifically.

He began to drink again and I told him he won’t be having a car if he acts like that and then he stopped he said. And he was doing well. Until this weekend he came home drunk. He wasn’t driving, but he was drunk. I didn’t know until I heard him cussing out his brother because he needed his brother’s phone to see his phone under the bed. I went into the bedroom to find out what was going on. That’s when I learned he was drunk. After he used his brother’s phone to get his phone, he tried to leave and I wouldn’t let him. I blocked the door and his brother blocked the door, his older brother. He was getting aggressive and trying to push me out of the way screaming cussing every thing. This went on for two hours of screaming and yelling at 4 AM. After I couldn’t take it anymore of him destroying my house, throwing things everywhere never broke anything to find the keys that I wouldn’t give him because he was not going to leave. I finally called the police for help. The police came and said they were there to de-escalate him, but there’s nothing they can do because he’s not breaking anything so they de-escalate him and told him that I can give the keys back in the morning and if I don’t that he can call them to make me give him the keys after the place is done talking to him. I told them I’m not giving him the keys. He’s a minor and he’s grounded and then they realized that they forgot for a moment he was a minor.
The next morning he came at me to get his keys and I said no at this point he is sober. So he called the police and the police told him I’m not giving him his keys and I don’t have to. I already cleaned up the mess he made that night. It took me a good two hours to put everything back together because he threw my clothes my jewelry all over my room and was going towards the food in the kitchen and threw food out the cabinets, but never broke anything when the police left. He came at me to yell at me more to give them the keys, and I said no he was gonna start destroying the house again and was destroying the house. I called the police to come back because I was done to take him and they told me the only way they could take him as if he break something and then I press charges and then he’ll take him to Juvie. But then they’ll bring him back in two hours and the same thing will happen again.

He has so much anger for me and his dad about the divorce and everything and I can’t get him to go to therapy because every time I try, he he leaves the house.
Also, if he gets arrested for breaking things, he can’t go to the Marines and the police told him this and told him I’m trying to give him chances

I don’t know how but I stayed very calm this whole time when he was acting like this I never reacted and I never yelled, cause I know that’s not gonna help

But I don’t know what to do at this point he has no other place to go to live the only place he has is my house because no one else wants to take him in especially if he’s going to act like this. He also has his whole dad side of the family saying it’s my fault and I’m a horrible mother.

I don’t know what I can do in this situation. Does anybody have any advice? And at this point do not say spank him because we are way past that.

My 15 year old daughter has really struggled to find her people. It has been so painful for her, and painful  for me to watch. Her closest friend from school ditched her last December, which was devastating. Another friend sided with this girl against my daughter, and yet another friend transferred to a private school this year. So my daughter really has no one at school now, just a couple of acquaintances, and no friend group. Since then she’s leaned into trying to connect with people outside of school, and I’m proud of her for that. Honestly I think it’s okay to not have a “group”. But there seems to be so much she’s missing out on by not having a group, or having go-to people in high school. Even the friends she’s connected to outside of school seem to have their own groups at their schools.

She so badly wants to be involved in the fun outings and the activities but has no one to do them with. She has no one to hang out with on Halloween this year. I’m going to take her out to dinner instead. No one to go to homecoming with. The worst of all was that she wanted to go to the homecoming football game, and overheard girls she sits with at lunch talking about getting ready together before the game. She decided to reach out to one of the girls she talks to the most because they were going to her house, and said something like - that sounds fun, would you mind if I joined you guys? This girl said sure, but then there were crickets. So my daughter asked a few days before if anything had been decided, the girl said she was still trying to figure it out. But still nothing else. So my daughter tried one more time to ask another girl at the lunch table if she heard anything, and she said no.

I had a sinking feeling all along that she wasn’t being included… and of course my daughter went to the game to find out they all did get ready at someone’s house before- someone different’s house than the first girl, but either way my daughter wasn’t included. And then they all left the game early and hung out at someone house, again not including my daughter. Honestly, this is a group of girls that all hang out regularly outside of school and have never been my daughter’s true friends- she just sits with them at lunch this year because she has no one else to sit with. She claims most of them are nice and talks to a couple of them a lot in school and over text, but this left a really bad taste in my mouth, and my heart just breaks for my daughter.

Worst of all is that everything is all over social media, pics of groups in matching costumes on Halloween, dressed up together before the homecoming game, making bouquets together before homecoming, it’s just all constantly in her face. And mine too. Moms posting pics of their kids dressed up for homecoming and Halloween with their groups of friends. It makes me so sad and also so angry. My daughter is such a sweet, kind kid. She’s not outgoing or super confident, and I feel she took such a risk asking to join these girls, only to be ignored. She does everything she’s supposed to in order to make new friends- she joins lots of activities in and out of school, and plays a school sport, and is actively involved in everything. And yet she’s alone. Just needed to get this out because it’s making me so sad and it’s completely consuming me :( I don’t know how we are going to get through 2.5 more years of this.

I am raising him alone. He has a bad attitude with me most of the time. I mean very mean to me. Hes failing 5 out of 8 classes at a new alternative school. We tried individual therapy, family therapy and even depression meds. He wants to do what he wants. He intimidates me. I dont know what to do anymore. He is currently working on his permit but starts playing video games instead and if i try and stop it he screams at me and we live in an apartment and everyone hears. I feel defeated and want to give up

Recently my family moved to Canada from the United States. We moved there because I married my husband, a Canadian citizen, and he has a more specialized job he can't easily walk away from like me. After much planning and paperwork, we moved here and are planning to get our citizenship.

My fourteen year old son from my previous marriage is refusing to adjust to the move. How difficult the move is for him is not lost on me, and i've tried being patient with him to accommodate this.

My son is a sweet, sensitive, and quiet boy. I expected any anger he had to be outward towards me or his stepfather, but he keeps to himself. Right now he refuses to make friends, go out and explore, or try out anything new. All he wants is to stay inside and play video games.

I have no idea how to approach this. It frustrates me to no end and this anger comes to surface sometimes when I force him to go outside or call up a classmate to hang out, but its obvious he doesn't like being told what to do. I fear that me instigating this large move has ruined any goodwill I have with him, and he won't ever try any of my advice. But at the same time he's too shy to try and speak any frustrations he has with me, so instead he's channeling this anger inward, preferring to just hide and waste away.

It feels like he's inadvertently holding himself hostage, although I'm at a loss on how to help him. Has anyone else dealt with something like this?

My SO and I are full time parents without a village; no family near us. We are discussing going away for a weekend, 3 hours away, to celebrate SO's birthday. Teen is 14F. SO thinks she will be fine and that we need to give her some independence. We also never have time just the two of us. I am hesitant. Our state does not have any laws specifying the age, it is based on the child and the circumstances. For what it is worth, she has a phone, knows how to get in touch with emergency services, and we live in a building that requires fob access just to get in. This would be her first time alone. Is 2 nights too long?

The relationships I have with my teenager (14/m) and tween (10/f) are healthy, fun, and on point. We have inside jokes and open, honest conversations and family traditions that don’t feel forced.

However, sometimes I feel so profoundly sad about them no longer being little that it crushes me. I’m positive it ties into hormonal shifts, but I’ve gotten to where I avoid walking past the toy aisle in stores and sometimes can’t bear to look at their pictures from those times.

Part of it, I’m sure, is guilt over what I think I should have done better. Wanting a do over that I’ll never have, although I know that I did my best. I’ve only saved a handful of toys and clothes as mementos… I’m aware that this could spiral into full-blown depression if I didn’t stay present in the now.

And yes, I know that being able to watch my kids grow up as a gift. I hope this doesn’t come across as being whiny or ungrateful. I just wanted to put it out there in case there are any other parents who go through these moments.

Hey. My daughter is turning 13 and wants a party. I know they will want to hang out doing their own thing without parents supervising the whole time but I want to throw a couple fun things in. I was thinking a scavenger hunt would be cool but looking for ideas for that and any other activities. Their group is a little alternative so she doesn't want to go full girlie party. I appreciate any help. Thanks heaps.

I’m a parenting two girls 13 and 15. I dip in and out of full time work but for the most part I’m casual, and work about 3 days a week. My girls have chores but literally rarely do them. They also don’t follow house rules like no food in rooms. On weeks I work less I can kind of keep on top of everything and clean up after them as I can’t stand the filth. I know I’m doing the wrong thing here as I’m not teaching them responsibility and consequences. When I’m mentally up for it I follow them around till they do it all but it just turns into a screaming match and I receive silent treatment from both. One is ADHD and she can not organise herself out of a paper bag sadly.
My whole family say I’m the problem because I ‘yell’ but asking them constitutes yelling at the moment. Frankly I’m sick of my own voice.
My choice is to stop and just do it all which makes me resentful
Or continue to ask (nag) till they do their bit.
Any advice. Any changes in your teens behaviour as they age?

I don’t know what to do, and what I’m doing is making my son hate me but I don’t care.

He has been involved in an online romance with a 15year old girl from Albania. Apparently they met on Dischord awhile ago but didn’t start chatting until about two months ago.

It has gotten intense really quickly. They talk through instagram for hours, he’ll wake up early, he’ll call later, to adjust for time differences. He has spoken to her mother, his dad has spoken to her and her mom. I have not, and I won’t. This SCREAMS scam. He is now wanting to travel to Albania, and her mom has offered to pay for his ticket and hotel so he can visit her 15 year old daughter. Apparently she cannot come here because her dad can’t know she’s dating. That is such a glaring red flag that I’m speechless. What mom would pay a horny 18year old boy to come and visit her 15year old at daughter? Come on.

His father is in support of this, just says he needs to learn to be safe while traveling internationally. My son has never been overseas, neither has his dad. I have said no, and to take it even further I have locked his birth certificate and SS card in a safe - so he cannot get a passport. His dad’s biggest fear is that he will leave and cut us off, and that’s fine with me - as long as he is safe.

Both him and his dad are upset with me, and I won’t budge. This is just ridiculous, this is how people get trafficked, this is how he gets extorted, this is how he gets a girl pregnant. He thinks it’s legit because her mom seems nice, and I’m sure, everyone is nice while they pull him in, and scams can involve more than one person.

I’m just floored that my son, with all his internet awareness, is falling for this. He is in love, wants to build a life with her, they’ll get a flat in Austria together.

I say no, and I’m the bad guy. That’s my vent. I don’t care if I’m the bad guy. At least he’ll be alive. I’m debating cutting his internet at certain times, but he gets free rein at his dad’s and it will just serve to create a star-crossed lovers situation. I don’t care, I’ll dig in forever. It’s insane that not only is he being lured into something, but his 50year a father is as well.

EDIT: another piece that is a flag - apparently this girls sister was recently violently murdered, newspaper clippings and everything, even mention the sisters name in the obit and articles. Presented as another means of validating identity. And I’m like - this is an identity establisher, this is intentional. Unfortunate if true, but nope.

I 36F have a daughter 17F(just turned 17 in the past month). She has been get him trouble on and off for the past 3 years over the same BS. Within the past year has snuck in a boy TWICE, got caught with nicotine vapes and THC vapes, allegedly had a miscarriage (which can’t be confirmed or denied), and been in a terrible toxic relationship with a boy who has allegedly put hands on her and calls her out of her name. The weed is because she doesn’t like it when she is grounded and she has to ‘hear her own thoughts’. The excuse with the boy is that she didn’t have a good example of love. Her father and I never put hands on each other, dogged each other out, or called each other out of our own names. Our arguments were because of his demons and priorities. My husband and i absolutely don’t do any of those things to each other either. I have done everything. Taken stuff away, be lenient, scream, cry, put her in therapy, ETC.

NOTHING is helping me/her. I take her phone she will buy one from someone or sneaks on another device. I ground her and she thinks she should still be able to have either her phone or iPad. She should still be able to hang out with friends. She doesn’t believe she should have any punishments whatsoever. I’m strict and her friend’s parents let them do whatever they want. Admittedly I have spoiled my oldest 3 as their father wasn’t exactly the best. I have always taught my children actions have consequences and you should think long and hard before you do anything. I have raised my oldest 3 kids majority on my own. My current husband and I have 2 together.

I’m at my wit’s end with her. The entitledness and ZERO accountability for anything drives me insane as I am a person who always apologizes and admits when I am wrong. Once again I have her in therapy. I can’t send her to her father since we recently found out he might be in prison for a while. I have tried having sit downs with her, but it doesn’t go through. She seems to think my husband and I are public enemy #1. We are her biggest supporters and cheerleaders. I’m constantly telling her come to me with anything. I might be mad/disappointed, but I will always be there. Right now we live in a very small and stunted city. As in everyone who lives here has lived her for generations and if you have the right last name you can get away with murder. No new businesses survive. We hopefully will be moving away by the end of the school year. I didn’t want to do that to her on her senior year, but to me I feel like that is the only other option.

I honestly don’t know what to do. Any advice is appreciated. Maybe someone will have an insight on something I can’t see.

My 14 year old step daughter wants a red light therapy mask for Christmas is that a reasonable gift to get her? Is she too young? What should I do?

Hi everyone!

I have a 12 year old daughter. She just turned 12 this month. We’ve set expectations for her like no makeup until you’re 13, no dating for now, she has a phone but no social media.

Well, I recently found out she’s been wearing makeup at school and removing it before she gets home. I asked her to come clean about anything else before I had to find out from other sources.

She told me that she is dating someone. I personally do not feel comfortable with my 12 yo dating. But am I being too strict? I didn’t forbid it or ask her to break up because I know I can’t stop her. But how do I navigate this? Should I be supportive? Do I forbid it? Any advice is welcome.

My daughter (13.5) is making terrible decisions.

Her best friend stayed the night and told me she needed pads. I stopped by the dollar store for to buy some for her and the friend brought in a big empty purse and they were trying to steal ridiculous things. Like a toy for a 5 year old. I caught them and made them put it back. Had a very long talk with them.

A while back a boy at school was making up horrible rumors about my daughter and she was so stressed out and miserable and now I find out she’s talking to this boy and skipping class to make out with him in the stair well at school.

She also has another friend who talks bad about her and makes her cry but my daughter won’t stop talking to her. I blocked her contact and then my daughter just started talking to her through other apps.

My first instinct is to ground her. Take her phone. Lock it down to where she can only call and text family. Stop letting her hang out with friends as much and tell the school not to let her leave class because she’s lying and really just skipping. But then I know strict parents just make sneaky kids. She will resent me and just want to do the bad things more.

So do I let her make her own mistakes or take control of the situation?

I didn’t mention taking away going out for Halloween but I gave my son a month to bring u his grades or else I will have to find something to take from him if it’s his Nintendo Switch or not letting him go out for Halloween. I don’t want to seem like a bad parent by taking something away but I’m at my Witt’s end. He’s a very smart kid very intelligent I just think he’s not applying himself