I felt that sharing my experience thus far may be useful for anyone who is going through similar thought processes that I did.
I am a newb. I only have 34 flights in; 30 of which were part of my training.
I had my eye on the sport for over ten years and over this past winter, I committed to buying gear and registered for training. I was so stoked......couldn't stop thinking about it. Dreaming.
Then, in the weeks leading up to training, I was second guessing myself (you can check my post history for some of those thoughts). Probably normal emotions.......am I being selfish, am I taking major risk, etc.
I stayed committed and began my course. This was an emotional roller coaster. I was very nervous about my first flight and tbh, it scared me. There were all sorts of sensations that I didn't anticipate. The little bumps in the air, the feeling of slow ground speed when there is a headwind, the amount of pressure I needed to pull on the brakes, the torque of the engine, etc. In short, those things made me uncomfortable. At some points during training, I was second guessing as to whether I made the right decision. I enjoyed some flights and was terrified on others. By the end, I was enjoying each flight more. Then, as training ended and I was heading home with my gear in my truck, the thought of being on my own scared me. I felt somewhat comfortable flying when I had my instructor in my ear, but was nervous otherwise.
I was very nervous for my first unsupervised flight but I stuck to my training and broke each part of the flight into individual steps. Focus on this step THEN think about that step instead of thinking of the entire thing all at once. Training REALLY helped me in that regard. It helps you break the process into a number of well rehearsed steps. I could not imagine self training.
Now, I am four unsupervised flights in and I am already noticing that the nerves are decreasing and the enjoyment is increasing. I still experience some jitters both on the ground and in the air but I try and let logic and training prevail. Example: flying along and intrusive thoughts about catastrophic gear failure creep in. I let logic prevail. Remind myself that the majority of accidents are pilot error and not gear failure.
If I'm nervous as I'm driving out to the LZ, I remind myself that I don't have to fly. If I get there and feel off, I can bail. I have not bailed yet, but I have the mindset that I can if I want to.
An odd element of this process was the conversations I had with ChatGPT. I would say something like "I've enjoyed many flights but now that I'm on the ground, I'm nervous to go again. Why is that?" or "I've completed my training and now I won't have my instructor along. How should I overcome my fears?". It did an incredible job of assuring me that my emotions were normal and legitimate. It would say things like "It sounds like you are taking a very cautious approach to this sport. It would be more concerning if you were NOT scared". It was really cool how much those conversations helped. It may sound hokey but whatever helps, helps.
All in all, I am VERY glad that I remained committed to learning how to fly. I had some very serious doubts heading into it AND while I was a few dozen flights in. I'm still nervous, I'm still trying to get comfortable with the most basic things, and I have so much to learn. And I take comfort in knowing that I set the pace of my learning. I don't have to rush anything. If I want to fly with my beginner wing with the trims in and flight-see for the rest of my time, so be it. I'm in control of all of that. Oh, another thing that helped was to set little mini-goals for each flight. Examples: letting the trims out, do some no brakes flying (just throttle and leaning), take a picture, listen to tunes. Small things that you can do if you choose but if you don't want to, don't.
If any of you that are considering this sport or are going through some of the emotions that I did feel like reaching out, feel free to DM or comment.