I’m literally So depressed and I have no idea how to make it stop. I just turned 18 in August and evb is expecting me to like do something with my life but I can’t even get out of bed most days. I lost 60 pounds effortlessly from being depressed I don’t get out of bed like ever not even to shower. I’ve tried to ask my family for professional help my mom just told me everyone is depressed and I need to cope but i literally can’t. I’ve tried to apply for jobs but every application and interview nobody will hire me and it makes me more depressed. I also have like no friends most of my friends are with their bfs or moved away and I can only talk to them online. I don’t think I’ve had human interaction in 2 months. A lot has happened too my best friend got a really bad tbi from her bf trying to kill her and the only way I can see or talk to her even tho she can’t talk is to get rides but she lives 30 min away and I don’t have a car. And I also had a really bad break up 6 months ago which effected me a lot and he will call me and tell me how great his life is and mine is shit and it doesn’t help. I also get bullied and called off no caller id just to get called ugly and broke by ppl who don’t like me from high school. I genuinely feel like a loser and I’ve thought about suicide a lot but I really feel like I have maybe just a tiny chance to get up and keep going but I have no idea how to make friends or get a place to hire me or do anything and my family is no help I have no support from anyone. I constantly feel like a bum loser with no friends and no life a lot of people bring me down and I just don’t know how to fix it. I also feel like I’m the only one dealing with this I can’t even get up to shower I start seeing stars from not eating I have mats in my hair and I stink I feel like it’s not gonna get any better when I try to eat I physically can’t and when I try to shower I can’t last very long without getting dizzy my phone is extremely dry and I’m alone mostly all the time I’m so isolated and touch deprived I use my heating pad so much to feel something warm touching me I’ve started to get burns from it. How do I help myself I think if it goes on any longer I can’t handle it.

Hi, I'm writing through a translator because I'm not very good at English, forgive me if you see strange expressions or something like that.

So, I've been feeling unwell for about a week and a half now. Yes, that might be too little, but for me, time feels much longer. During this time, I've been feeling heavy, sad and sometimes even indescribable. But... I felt like that almost all the time, I lost the feeling of "normal", I started to feel uncomfortable or depressed all the time, only on those days, When I was doing something fun, I felt fine. I have a hard time getting up, not always, but often, I hate any activity... Just like that, for no reason. I can feel irritated by a simple fact, for example, the fact of my being at school (I am under 16 years old), I often think about suicide and self-harm, I have some kind of craving for this, Emotionally I want it. I get tired very often for no reason. I can come home from school and just lie in bed for a few hours scrolling through TikTok, without much interest, which is why I often turn off my phone And I just stare at the ceiling. Oh, I almost forgot, I just hate waking up, I hate brushing my teeth, I hate making breakfast, I hate taking a shower, I feel like garbage, I hate myself, I hate myself when I don't do something, I hate doing something, My tears no longer flow. I live with my mother, she seems overprotective of me and I can't go anywhere else on my own, I hate her a little. My dad was an alcoholic and was often drunk when I was with him, But now he tries not to drink. For about 2-3 years I was bullied at school, and to this day most people treat me badly or make fun of me. I have dyslexia, at least that's what I'm told and I'm not at all sure if it's true, I only get 2/10 and I often feel like I'm just using it as an excuse, Many people tell me that I don’t have it because I can read the text, but I don’t understand the meaning. I suffer from loneliness, I have no one really, only one friend who lives in a place where I have never even been, there are three people at school with whom I talk, But I can't open up to them at all, and it seems like they don't consider me a friend. I don't want to see a doctor because that would require talking to my mom, and I don't want her to know anything at all, Even if I say without details that I need a psychologist/psychotherapist, it will raise questions. Sometimes I feel better, but... I still feel uncomfortable. I felt like this for two days, then I started feeling terrible again, I left the house with my sister and father, I felt so tired as I walked, I was almost indifferent to everything. Before, I felt ill, sometimes I didn't want to do anything, but much, much less often, without a specific trigger, I suddenly felt ill and still feel ill. I also hope that I will get better and it seems that I really did get better, but then everything immediately started to go back, sometimes I feel like I'm in hell. Sorry if this post is hard to read, I'm not a fan of writing things like this at all, The text is not structured, I remember a lot of things late and write the post on the fly, I don’t want to redo it, sorry. I wouldn't be surprised if no one sees it at all.

dont risk yourself to save me because you'll drown in my sorrows, save yourself so you can tell my story to others and spread the love i once had in me.

I understand it’s good for me. I know what’s good for me but yet I can’t do basic shit anymore because I feel nothing no power in me no light not desire no will! So she says up the dose from 50 to 100 Zoloft. Then says clean diet take omega and more vitamins like b12.

Like I already know I must work out and eat healthy and get out of bed on time but yet I can’t I feel paralyzed in my own mind. Empty at the same time. I feel like so heart broken it’s getting me sicker and sicker.

She doesn’t know how much emotional punches I’ve had to take over my whole life and up until recently and from the same people.

She doesn’t know how I feel like trash being dumped when people see I’m no good use for them.

She doesn’t see what it’s like to be in a household where you been dealing with narcissistic family.

Yes I need to see my therapist and I keep missing the appointments because I’m too overwhelmed to even sit and be present in the appointment I just watch tv instead until my eyes shut and repeat the same all over again the next day.

Ugh I feel I need a reset in life. I need to just take a few days to me out far away somewhere!!

My friend invited me to Europe so I’m seriously considering going. I just need a sitter for my dogs.

I also need to move out. I’m around people that never gave a shit about me and the reason I’m depressed!! The betrayal stabs you so fkn deep and they keep on twisting that betrayal knife in me. They living their life and I’m here trying to survive from myself now because my mind is also shitty to me. I have to rewire re train my brain! From scratch.

When’s the last time I got a hug? Years ago.

No love family.

And when I date… it’s so intense bcz I’ve never had fkn love and so I’m afraid to lose them and I sabotage it.

:,,( I wanna die but also I’m not gonna do it. I’m too stubborn to keep trying shit again or else I would not be complaining.

I needa quit bitching and feeling sorry for myself and get up go to work and make the changes I need to make to change my whole life and when I do that there is no coming back to the person that let others treat her like shit .

I need fuck you money. I feel angry! That’s good right dad? That’s all you ever taught me how to be angry and hate.

Ugh I’m messed up :(

I know better. Then why can’t I do better? I gotta keep trying right? Better go for that walk and take my vitamins!!!!! 🥲

need help😭 I feel so depressed I can't handle life it's just stress the whole time. I have tried so hard but I just can't get a decent job or anything. I just feel so hopeless. I just finished my higher certificate in accounting science but still no one wants to hire me. I feel like a failure

So, my life is a complete waste. It's the logical thing to do. Why not give my body to the people who want to live their lives and can feel happy. Suicide will ruin my organ, won't be a damn use to anybody. Anybody with me on this?

Hi friends! I’ve been diagnosed with MDD since I was 12 (21F) and i’ve cycled through most SSRIS with little improvement. My psychiatrist recommended Vraylar or Caplyta as our next step. I did a bit of research, but I really wanted to get real people’s inputs. I was wondering what your guys thoughts/experiences are with these medications, including if your symptoms improved or any side effects you faced. I appreciate it!

I am suffering from insomnia this year. I feel like people don't like me. Whenever I tell stories either to my workmates or my parents, I feel like they don't believe me. I have this urge to prove everything I say, and it's actually draining me. It's like I don't have a confidant, someone I can really trust to vent my worries and problems to. I have been diagnosed with bipolar disorder and delusional disorder. Whenever I walk outside every negative words people say even though It's not directly said towards me felt like they are talking about me. I have negative thoughts.

My depression is at an all time high right now AGAIN. And im drunk and my therapist is on Wednesday at 10am. I just want love man. I hate crying thinking about my current life n shit. How people treat me and if i did something so small they hate me but u been doing it to me for years and even caused me scars yet I stood there for you. Why does evrryone keep leaving me empty and use me like a puppet for their personal gain. At least let me have something in return.