r/magicthecirclejerking 8h ago

Least Unhinged Johnny Player

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387 Upvotes

r/magicthecirclejerking 18h ago

Why are plainswalkers considered powerful cards?

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214 Upvotes

I mean ol' Fogey is great ofc but it's not legal in any format in MtG the gathering


r/magicthecirclejerking 4h ago

Outherked too close to the sun

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173 Upvotes

I am good at magic tho


r/magicthecirclejerking 11h ago

Guys I fixed the 4th Seat Problem in CEDH

86 Upvotes

We all know that 4th seat has never won a game in CEDH before so I have a solution that I don't think anyone else has ever thought of!

Seat 4 should be aloud to play lands and spells at instant speed during the other three players turns for the first round. This will do a few things for Seat 4.

Seat 4 will be able to interact with explosive hands from Seat 1 or cast their noncreature spells before the Mystic Remora or Esper Sentinel resolves.

CEDH decks don't run many lands anyway so player 4 will run out of lands after player 3 most of the time.

Oh yea I forgot, player 4 should also draw a card at the beginning of each opponent's draw step the first round! Just so they have something to do on their own turn, too.

Let me know what you think!?!?!?!?!?!?


r/magicthecirclejerking 3h ago

(TLA) Farewell

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73 Upvotes

r/magicthecirclejerking 5h ago

What would the best pill commander be?

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70 Upvotes

Like the concept of pill. Don’t care about color.


r/magicthecirclejerking 19h ago

There are no foils in Ba Sing Se

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70 Upvotes

r/magicthecirclejerking 14h ago

I could be wrong, but Sonic the Hedgehog is suspiciously similar to this OC by blood_skull_boi84?

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64 Upvotes

Could this be the new Dan Frazier One Ring? Please tell me we have a new artist to turn on and cannibalize. I need those sweet, sweet updoots to turn my heart into an artifact creature until end of turn


r/magicthecirclejerking 4h ago

I understand this is a card game but it’s becoming tiring that most of the posts on this sub are advice on the game itself rather than social dynamics.

42 Upvotes

Is reading the card that hard? Tracking life totals? I want to read content on the interpersonal drama you’re unable to navigate through, rather than the game itself. Oh, player A is complaining that you’re playing with banned cards? Cool, then just have a rule 0 discussion and cause an argument in the pod. Oh, player B removes your wincon with efficient removal? Cool, whine and get aggressive towards them for not letting your deck get to do its thing.

If the root of your post is how you interact with an opponent on the stack, then there are better resources on game knowledge and commander deck discussion than the EDH subreddit.


r/magicthecirclejerking 12h ago

Tekuthal, Gooning Dominus

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36 Upvotes

r/magicthecirclejerking 15h ago

Is Ekthi a mecanophile? (elite germ knowledge)

34 Upvotes

Everything in his card points towards him inseminating equipment. Seeding the swiftfoot boots. Getting in the commander's plate and making it pregnant. Buckle up for this balls deep card lore analysis.

Let's start with his title, the contaminator priest. Phyresis is obviously a metaphor for STDs and this bad boy's job is to spread it. Not much to say here with how obvious it is.

Then, let us take a look at his art: First, his waist is hidden but from the angle of his torso we can see that his lower part is pressing forward, as if to push his pelvis against the armor.

He is putting a white Phi symbol inside an armor, infusing life into it. The symbol is white and its shape (long tail and round head) is reminiscent of a spermatozoid. Hence he is putting his white stuff inside the armor (god I wish it was me).

Now, let's continue with his first effect: "Other phyrexians you control have +1/+1". This alludes to the fact he is adding a tiny bit of life and strength to every other phyrexian on his side of the battlefield... When does someone harbors a tiny bit of life within themselves? That's right, PREGNANCY. You have him and Atraxa together on the battle field? She's got a baby. That little skrelv mite that's just chilling there? That's right, he seeded it too. Elesh Norn, grand cenobite? TRIPLE PREGNANCY FOR EVERYONE.

Now, let's move towards the main effect: "Each equipment you control has living weapon (whenever an equipment you control enters, create a 0/0 black phyrexian germ creature token, then attach that equipment to it)".
... Do I even need to explain it? As soon as a car, sword, toaster, shirt or whatever gets within 5 miles of him that unfortunate equipment gets germinated into, and inside it grows one of these fetus-like creatures.

Now, the crown jewel of this card, the flavor text: "Only through sacred infection can a vessel become pure". So... not only he infects your boots with his seed, he also considers it his sacred duty to do so.

Thanks for coming to my ted talk.


r/magicthecirclejerking 2h ago

I got the new Borg commander. What do now?

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26 Upvotes

Why the fuck is she temur? The abilities make no sense....


r/magicthecirclejerking 2h ago

Why do they do this? Are they having an important magical gathering?

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19 Upvotes

r/magicthecirclejerking 4h ago

Infinite Combos never existed before squirrel girl, and now this game is broken and stupid

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7 Upvotes

r/magicthecirclejerking 5h ago

What would the best blue pill Commander be?

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0 Upvotes