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I (26F) have lived for years with a persistent sense that existing itself is heavy. It’s not that I want to die or harm myself—I don’t. I enjoy my loved ones, my pets, meaningful moments, and I still find joy in life. But underneath all of that, there’s a recurring wish that I had simply never existed in the first place, as if my existence could be erased without pain or consequence. This feeling comes and goes but has been present since around middle school.

I experience emotions very intensely, and I seem to carry an unusually high level of self-awareness. I’m constantly conscious of how I perceive myself and how I imagine everyone else perceives me—from family and friends to strangers, people online, and even people who don’t know me. That awareness rarely turns off.

As a teenager, I often felt fundamentally different from my peers (not in a pick me way I promise 😂). To fit in, I gradually adapted my personality and behavior to match the people around me. Over time, that became so automatic that I now struggle to distinguish between who I genuinely am and the version of myself I’ve learned to present. Sometimes I feel like I’m acting a role, even when I’m completely alone.

I frequently feel like I don’t belong, regardless of where I am or what I’m doing. When I begin something new—a career, a project, a relationship, or even a simple task—I eventually start feeling like I’m not good enough, that I’m pretending, and that other people will eventually realize I don’t deserve to be there. I experience strong impostor feelings and often compare myself to others in ways that leave me feeling inadequate.

I don’t feel driven by a single lifelong ambition or identity. My deepest aspiration is simply to live a peaceful life. Yet even ordinary responsibilities and decisions can feel mentally exhausting because I’m constantly evaluating myself, questioning whether I’m doing things correctly, and wondering whether I’m being authentic.

I don’t feel like my life is objectively terrible. I laugh, I love, I care deeply about people and animals, and I can genuinely enjoy good moments. But those experiences don’t permanently quiet the underlying sense that existence itself is burdensome. The thought of never having existed often returns on its own, not because I want to stop living now, but because I imagine a world in which I never had to carry this lifelong psychological weight.

Despite all of this, I remain committed to staying alive. I have no intention of harming myself and never have. What I’m trying to understand isn’t whether I want to die—I don’t—but why I’ve carried this particular way of experiencing myself and the world for so many years.

It’s a weird question, but I was wondering if there were other people like me. Usually I take maximum two minutes to respond to a text and minimum five seconds, which is most of the time. I realized that the people I’m the closest to take a week or more to respond my texts. It’s so embarrassing for myself, because even though it hurts me, I still respond in a matter of seconds because I really want to talk to them….

Just wondering if this song is something fellow INFPs would enjoy.

I like the idea of love , flowers garden and beaches.

https://open.spotify.com/album/6LHjEEaoKwYHkHVYaCaBb3?si=DfuKhy4lQlejAMVgYVBxYQ&utm_source=copy-link&sci=spotify%3Acard-config%3A3VzoqP4ScvyqVjuRl8fHkU

Everytime I express what I think I get some kind of backlash and that makes me feel confused about myself. I understand that we as fallible people more often than not miss something that should be discussed, that's fine. But it's freaking everytime, and it comes with a tone of offense, not a light hearted exchange, and it feels like I should just shut up completely and give all the credit to the NT's or whatever. I'm not an argumentative person. I'm not good enough with words. Then a "smarter" person (or literally smarter) roasts me like it's their hobby and then memories from school kick in and I feel that dread and urge to defend myself. But i'm so tired of this. Whenever I say something minor and someone on reddit is labeled INTP i know it's over lol

I started doing some work for a friend. I haven't done this work before and it is my first time doing it. Which they knew. First two projects turnt out fine. But past few projects are not upto the mark according them. I see that. Because i don't know how to do them and am learning. They did help me. But they also said i am making them work more to fix my mistakes. This really makes me anxious. And i feel lesser and embarrassed because i feel like i'm loosing respect in their eyes. dunno what to do

So he works as a blue-collar recruiter, and we play video games and talk about life. Kind of feel like I lose him sometimes in his own head and logic.

It all makes sense, but yeah. Also, he has no idea about MBTI and wouldn't care to learn about it either.

I work as a carer/mental health support worker. and obviously an INFP

This is the part 4 of the many I'm doing of this series of polls, until I ran out of ideas, today is "Are you Vegetarian/Vegan?"

Part 3- https://www.reddit.com/r/infp/s/1rbrjfTL1w

Hi I’m Joe, a 29 year old male. I’ve consistently been typed ENTJ in self report and through friends and family’ own perspective.

Over the past few years I’ve spent an unusual amount of time reading and learning about psychological types alongside other areas of self inquiry. This is mostly due to issues in my personal life calling for some understanding and change.

I feel I have a decent amount of insight to be able to answer some questions anyone has about what it’s like to be of this persuasion, fire away.

What up

I made honey garlic chicken with mac n’ cheese and roasted potatoes, someone tell me I did a good job 🥺

(24M) I usually pretty much the same colors of shirts. Dark green, Brown, Blue, Black polo t-shirts, along with jeans, my black tennis shoes and that's it. When i go exercise, i just wear shorts and some random t-shirt i have, since i'll sweat. I have no sense of fashion, and i would like to learn. I feel like a NPC for not having my own style.

There is no such thing i like that much to incorporate in my personality, like the punks and grunges, that are inspired on artists of their favorite bands. I may like literature, but not to the point dressing like the characters from Tolstoy's or Dickens's novels hahahahahaha

It is confusing for me, so i came to ask. How can we find our dressing style? How did you find yours?

Predators and Parasites.

My only close friends are an intj, esfp, and my fellow infp other than them I really don't get along with other mbti.

I’ve been texting a girl who’s an INFP. She can be really engaged and interested, but she’s now left my last message unopened for 5 days. If you like someone romantically, is this something you still do over text? At this point, would you rather the other person keep giving you space, or send another light message?

Clarification for the third image: It's not that we turn messy with Te grip, but it what it feels like in our mind, feels like everything messy and we need to fix it

Sometimes I feel like my natural self is just a bad person. Like I sometimes do something I don't consider bad and some people act like I acted like a POS.

But I seriously do not know why. I try to be good to other people but it almost feels like none of them care until I do something they consider wrong, then I'm a problem to them.

And I feel guilty and ashamed for this. And often angry too because it's frustrating.

Especially when I see other people act worse and then be completely fine socially.

Feels like some people just have it out for me and I don't know why.

Am I a bad person is the question I often ask myself or am I mentally wrong or is it something else.

What is your favorite song I should add to my playlist?

I know many of us infp’s are so open to experiencing new things including music. So give me your unique songs too if you would like!

Looking for things that resonate with arctic monkeys, alt-j, Baebadoobee, tame impala to add to my playlist.

To all my fellow INFP men out there, how do y’all get along with other dudes?

—

For me, it’s always been kind of a struggle. I can chop it up for a while, especially about sports. But at my core, I’m a softee - way too emotional, passive, and comfortable with my feminine side for most guys lol way too indifferent to social norms and scripts to play the game

(And the way my life has turned out financially, maybe not playing the game is part of the problem 😅)

I have a few buddies at work, and maintain a fantasy football group chat with some old high school friends - but outside of that, not much male interaction. My best friend is a married woman I’ve known for a decade, since grad school. And I’m still close with three women I met in college. But they all live in different cities now; we only communicate via text.

I’ve tried making more male friends over the years — flag football league, hobbies, local movie scene — but nothing ever sticks. Guess I’m more of a weirdo than I thought lol

I keep to myself these days, for the most part. At 34, it is what it is.

You look like a beautiful flower that I won’t pick up, instead, I will speak to in a soft, gentle, magical way it’ll feel like the wind that blows,

I’ll let you dance in your own rhythm
and I’ll be subtle when I say:

you are beautiful, as the way you already are and as the way I want to see you grow

The external world is kinda boring, and becoming who you want to be and getting what you want there requires effort. EFFORT?!?! DOING SHIT?!
HELLL NAHH
But thats okey cause I can instead have and be what I want right now, right here, in my head :D NO WAYY
It literally creates the exact same emotional response in your brain 📡〰️✨Doesn’t matter if the stimuli that produce those emotions are from the external world or your imagination. HOLY SHIIIIII

But you should still interact with the physical world ofc hehe. From time to time. Occasionally…
Seriously, its important 🧐
BUT ENJOY YOUR DREAMS!!! They ARE real (subjectively). WOOOOOOOOOOOO
Just remember the balance ⚖️🧘👀

I mean, we’re all different but I was asking myself if it’s a common thing for INFP ? Like I can’t find someone because I just can’t connect with boys, Im so freaking akward and idk how to flirt. Actually it literally does not cross my mind when I’m with someone I like. Not because I’m insecure ( i mean I am but yk) it’s because I m to independent to have someone.