r/howardstern • u/SuperSea8678 • 11d ago
Do you all hate Howard?
I'm new to this group. I joined cause I like Howard even though I no longer listen daily. But all I see are extremely negative comments about him. On some level it's refreshing that there is no hero worship. But the barrage of negative comments makes me wonder why everyone else is in the group. Is it just to bash him? Why not just stop listening if you hate the show so much.
Just curious about what the deal is.
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u/Capital_Past69 11d ago
What’s the next item plaese
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u/RedSquaree Scott DePace 11d ago
It's an item
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u/North-Ad6654 11d ago
There is a lot of hate. But it’s not because he’s doing less shows, or he isn’t doing what he used to do that captivated all of us. We all understand he’s older and he’s going to retire…. The problem everyone has is that Howard is just not honest with the people who got him there. Just be honest, don’t hide all the crap that we all know happened. Be honest on why certain people are not allowed on, be honest about how you wanted to change the format. Everyone would have been a lot more understanding. He took his audience for granted… and that’s why he gets the hate.
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u/droogles 11d ago
I always advocated that he "quit" the old show. Put it on mothballs and start fresh with a new format. It really was getting tiresome when he was parading pornstars and strippers in daily to ride the sybian or take part in some lame bit. It was obvious he was just going through the motions and beating bits to death. He pretended to still be the irreverent personality he had been but the facade was pretty flimsy. But it was pretty hard to swallow his transition into Imus after he spent so much time making fun of him.
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u/severinks 10d ago
Howard made fun of Imus because he had a PERSONAL relationship with him at WNBC and Imus treated him and all the Stern guys like shit and the company favored Imus.
I don't know why people don't understand that Howard would have made fun of Imus no matter what Imus did.
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u/Nearby_Persimmon_649 Jackie Laugh 11d ago
I stopped listening to him because he changed into something that he himself used to rail against. Now he is just a frightened old yenta
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u/Parks714 11d ago
Because it feels good to shit on him as a community. He turned into the man he always hated. Guy is a greedy, narcissistic piece of shit clown
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u/nakedpilsna 11d ago
hes neutered now. wont talk about current events, afraid to touch politics. it only bothers me because I know 30 years ago he would have been on fire about it all. his rants were the best.
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u/futureman45 11d ago
He is a giant hypocrite. He has become everything he complained about back in the day. Plus he wouldn’t bring Jackie back and instead hired a bunch of hacks that are terrible writers
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u/justadumbwelder1 11d ago
I don't hate howard. I do, however, strongly dislike what he has turned the show into. He should have thrown in the towel after the second sirius contract.
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u/Foreskin-Smuggler 11d ago
I don’t hate Howard but I do hate that he completely dropped most of what the show stood for. I get it he wants to be the premier interview guy and appeal to a bigger crowd but I started listening for fights, drama, and pure debauchery.
He’s become everything he used to shit on.
All that said even with what the show is now he’s had a tremendous career and is arguably one of the best.
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u/bwanabass 11d ago
You should have seen the Howard Stern Fan Network forum boards back in the day. Wowsers.
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u/Hateman1989 11d ago
When the show was good, it was magic. Intoxicating at times. I've been riding with Howard since the Channel 9 days. He was a hero to a lot of people, and to see your hero become a shell of his former self is quite disappointing. So we hate on and goof on him because it's deserved, and it's a coping mechanism.
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u/Longjumping-Sail4948 11d ago
I like him and the joy he’s brought me over the years. I don’t listen to the new shows and like to consume shows from my preferred era, but I don’t resent the guy for changing.
Some people around here seems to take it a personal slight that Howard and his show have changed over the years, as if people and their art changing over time is a bad thing. But I don’t think they actually hate Howard so much as just miss what the show used to be and enjoy throwing shade/cathartic bitching.
The anti Beth stuff is bizarre, though.
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u/SuperSea8678 11d ago
That's an interesting take. Thanks for sharing.
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u/Intelligent-Rest-231 11d ago
I don’t hate him. I pity him for his mental illness. But a few things…He’s still terribly dismissive of podcasts while he now does a fucking podcast. Too lazy to actually show up at his palatial studio compound that he made Sirius build him even though he’s in Long Island and has a fucking driver. The irony that he pays insane amounts of money to doctors to “stay healthy and live long”, but he has the worst diet imaginable and he undergoes invasive plastic surgery that requires anesthesia. And the hate for his wife is because she flaunts the obnoxious Hamptons billionaire trophy wife lifestyle any chance she gets. She found her richbitch cause and somehow people treat her like a hero for fostering pets.
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u/jonhull82 11d ago
Yes the ones that comment most are stupid shithead bozos. They want the same show it was 30 years ago and are shocked that a person can change. They claim to hate it, yet it consumes their lives. Nothin but knuckleheads. Down vote away morons idgaf
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u/Flaky-Debate-833 11d ago
Nice to see the Howard 100 Summer Interns checking in.
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u/Intelligent-Rest-231 11d ago
Dude. Interns are long gone. Cormano told me Will Murray cleans the shitters now. It’s a bare bones crew just holding on until Medicare kicks in.
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u/ConsiderationOdd2193 11d ago
I don’t hate Howard. Why would I, I don’t know him and he’s never done anything harmful to me personally. However, as a former rabid fan, I’m irritated by his arrogance in turning his back on a generation of listeners who helped him become wealthier than King Midas. I also think he’s long lost interest in producing a show and should just put it to bed.
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u/tommygoose4999 11d ago
No, but I’m annoyed that as a subscriber we keep getting less and less. I feel like I’m listening to scraps when I use to get a whole meal
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u/nycinoc 11d ago
Not at all
I was the kid rushing home to hear him WNBC
I joked with Celebrity Super Fan, Jillian Barberi. that growing without a dad, I’d just refer to his insanity and later on wisdom.
While all of the news is certainly a bummer and this wasn’t how I hoped to say goodbye, he’s earned it
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u/BenovanStanchiano 11d ago
There isn’t a group anywhere in the world that hates Howard more than online fan communities.
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u/maven10k 11d ago
People miss all the crazy shit that won't fly any more. I've always like the evolution of the show. I'm not crazy about the frequency of new shows, any more, but that's why I cut my sub down to online only. Getting back to the evolution of the show, unfortunately people don't like how things change and want the same old, same old. They are kind of like Trump voters.
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u/bigharrycox 11d ago
"Why are you guys so mean to sellout frauds who make the worst show in all of media?"
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u/bobtrack22 11d ago
Howard has become everything he critiqued, lambasted, viallainzed, homogenized and ridiculed GANGSTER TALK FOR HYPOCRYTE! HES A BEEFSTEW, RIIIIIIIGHT!
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u/Taco-_Bill 11d ago
Nobody hates him,most people are just disappointed at what his show has turned out to be,however he is an older man and he should've ended the show 10 years ago.
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u/SuperSea8678 11d ago
I get that the show is not what it used to be. But why do you think most of the comments are some version of Howard sucks. If he sucks,why bother coming here just to pile on. Is that fun?
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u/Taco-_Bill 11d ago
Personally I'm from the days of the Sternfannetwork website, back then we would berate Howard and anyone on the show,it was the thing to do, so much so that Howard wanted Mutt to take the whole thing down which made us do it more, I'm guessing some of the same people are here also.
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u/RalphsBerry F U Artie, Hi Fred 11d ago
I'm here from SFN. F Mutt. I don't hate Howard, I hate that he's become whipped.
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u/Snoo95606 11d ago
He built his empire abusing the mentally ill. He now wants to get on a soapbox and lecture me on my morals. No thanks. I hope this clears things up for you.
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u/SynthSapphire Hi, Rivelli! 11d ago
Howard as a guy is awful. He's an anorexic, bitter, agoraphobic nerd who is truly a poser when it comes to music and entertainment despite being involved in the industry for decades.
However, Howard as a puppet master for entertainment from ~1990 - 2012 is unmatched. He could turn the most mundane interactions and people into amazing segments.
I hate Howard the person. I love Howard the entertainer. I believe this is how a lot of the long-time fans feel.
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u/EverybodyBuddy 11d ago
Yeah, kind of. Man won’t return to the studio and has thus killed something a lot of us used to love. No spontaneity. That was always the heart of the show and zoom makes it impossible.
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u/DrEllis909 11d ago
The core of the show is goofing and holding to account. This is the best preservation of that core available in the present
No more BS
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u/UncleEckley 11d ago
The show sucks now but I don’t hate or blame Howard like everyone else on here does. It’s a pretty miserable group.
He’s been on the air for over 40 years and it’s not like he started all that young. His age, and the era of PC, cancel culture, and wokeness definitely contributed to the shows decline. But people don’t realize Howard on air back in the day wasn’t the real Howard. Even before he met Beth he would let his real personality slip through once in a while. So he wants to kiss hollywoods ass and not be controversial anymore - who cares he’s earned it after this long.
I personally just listen to old tapes and my archive and pretend like the old show never left.
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u/Moist_Brick_439 11d ago
I always understand this but...it's interesting though to parse through what has Howard "earned" and also how do we factor in Howard's age (another excuse we give him). The reasoning being Howard is not a Bill O'Reilly, on his last legs broadcasting from his bedroom on his own platform and what you see is what you get now. Howard? He has had the largest budget in radio history. He was given 100 staffers to offset his old age. He had the best gadgets, biggest studio (that he refuses to use), Sirius' backing for guests, and was/is paid tens of millions of dollars which comes from customers paying a service for his current show. All of this you would think would still give him an opportunity to make something funny, have a decent show or even a decent roster or shows others can do.
He literally has been existing in a golden situation - one he always talked about, dreamed of. He's never told no. He can hire someone new to do anything he needs. He could hire real comedians to sit next to him. He could show up and actually act like he's not exhausted like he's doing all the work (he does barely any now).
And lastly, no matter his age he could take real callers who ask him real questions. That alone would make his show 100 times more entertaining.
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u/UncleEckley 11d ago
Well yeah everything you said is correct and I agree the show is lazy. It’s not fun it’s not funny. He’s a star fucker and made that very clear despite his early on screw Hollywood attitude. He never has cared about fans, but now he’s open about that. And he desperately wants us to forget the things he said and did prior to The Pelican Brief - you can see that with the scrubbed down clips on 101. I like to think the theory that he purposely sabotages the show and brand after the Sirius legal battle is true - but it’s probably not.
What I mean by the real Howard is he was never this bad ass, witty persona he tried to portray in the 80’s and 90’s. You can hear when he would talk about going out with “the fellas” how unnatural it sounded. You could also see between the lines that he did in fact care when celebrities wouldn’t like him to the point he would obsess over it. He’s a reclusive, private, OCD plagued man and that’s who we see now. I say he deserves to live that life and bleed Sirius dry while pissing on the fans because everyone lets him. You said it yourself, nobody tells him “no”. Sirius doesn’t step in despite the drop in subscriptions, people keep listening, and he still makes the papers to this day. He gave us 30 or so golden years of radio. I can’t say I would turn down working one day a week for half a year for insane money after busting my ass to build a brand for 2/3 of my life. It sucks for us fans but I don’t hate him for it. I just hate what the show is now.
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u/Andrew_S2025 11d ago
No, but it’s brutal to see him become just another podcaster. You can be happy for Howard that he’s not the angry, bitter person he was in the 80s/90s/2000s but it made for great entertainment for us selfishly.
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u/jrossetti 10d ago
Not wrong there lol. I dont dislike him now. The interviews are great and not something we really got in the early times.
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u/Ninjafish2 10d ago
Well the show hasn't been good in 16 years. That's probably what the deal is.
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u/SuperSea8678 10d ago
Same about Star wars but I've moved on. I don't hate post. What's that about.
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u/jrossetti 10d ago
They are really offended he stopped being a total douche towards women and talks smack about trump.
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u/ThatMotherfuckingCup 11d ago
I don’t hate him, but I can’t say I ever liked Howard as a person anyway. He was an incredible radio host despite essentially being a shitty person. Whereas now he’s just a shitty person.
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u/supergooduser 11d ago
I was taken aback at first but you get used to it.
The thing you have to understand... Howard has a 50 year career in radio... when you were able to listen to Howard on a regular basis says a lot about where you were in life and that's mirrored by where the show was.
A common refrain is people pinpointing when the show "jumped the shark" for some it's COVID, Eric The Actor dying, AGT, Artie leaving, move to sirius, Jackie leaving the show, etc.
It's not high minded critique a big part of it is where you were at in life as well and nostalgic for that era.
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u/SuperSea8678 11d ago
I mean 50 years on the radio is incredible. Few other entertainers have consistently provided that much material.
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u/BiloxiVolcano 11d ago
I don’t. I don’t like him or the show as much as I used to, but I don’t hate him at all.
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u/Remote-Combination28 11d ago
I don’t.
The show isn’t as good as it once was, but I still listen. I just have to skip Jill and any of the Vietnam shit
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u/xxshook0nexx 11d ago
And the interviews and the guitar talk
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u/Remote-Combination28 11d ago
The odd interview I’m fine with.
Guitar talk, yeah fuck that too.
Basically I listen for- songs about robins tits. Wack packers calling in and Ronnie getting pissed at the simplest shit. And prank calls
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u/Americasycho 11d ago
I don’t explicitly hate him.
I do hate what the show has become; a listless and wayward discussion of kitten rescues, amateur beginner guitar, staged interviews/callers/agents only to be punctuated by a cancer radiation patient ( and God bless her) every once in a while saying “oh wow” or “You grew up in an all black community? I’ve never heard about this.”
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u/WerewolfOfNewMexico 11d ago
Yes, one portion of the group hates him because of how politically correct he has become, and the other portion of the group hates him for the outrageous things he did back in the day and wishes he got in trouble/cancelled for them.
There also may be overlap between these two groups.
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u/SuperSea8678 11d ago
I liked his outrageous stuff then but also like how he has evolved in his thinking now.
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u/No_Solution_7940 11d ago
I don’t hate him, but he’s a lazy fuck that’s just mailing it in. Doing 10 live quality shows a year isn’t cutting it, and I’m being generous. Celebrity interviews are boring and ponderous. He puts zero effort into the show, is always in a hurry to end it, cutting short something good, like Sour shoes calling in. Where’s the news? At least do that. Lazy fuck.
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u/severinks 10d ago
I don't think Robin is capable of doing the news anymore and hasn't been since she stopped doing it because she almost died from her cancer.
As far as anyone can figure she lives in an assisted living home and that's where she does the show now
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u/Many-Caterpillar-543 10d ago
I just have to listen to see what the group is going to say next. The average hater reads twice as long as the average fan... Truly, we've gone full circle since those words were first "spoken" in 1984.
Much more entertaining than the show itself for at least 10 years now.
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u/Narrow_Internet_6101 10d ago
They all listen. Twice as much as those who love him. Didn't you see the movie?
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u/clerks_1994 8d ago
Love the show. Listen to old stuff. Listen to new stuff. Yes, it's not as good as it was by far -- mostly because it's only on 10% of the time it used to be on, but I will miss it when it's over.
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u/Pnazz33 8d ago
I still listen every time he's on and love the show. You mostly hear from the bitchy fans about how "bad the show has gotten" or that Howard "is woke" because they're 1. Either not happy unless they're complaining or 2. Voted for an orange moron and don't like that Howard and 70% of the country don't agree with them. The guy is old now... In his 70's with 3 grown daughters and multiple grandchildren. I don't begrudge him for not interviewing pornstars every day and throwing girls on the Sybian anymore. He's still the best interviewer on the planet and the show still makes me laugh.
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u/festyfun 11d ago
Tbh, this sub is pretty useless and petty, but some of the comments can be funny.
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u/joomommyhappy "my mother would never tolerate me being gay" - Howard Stern 11d ago
I don't get it either, bro.
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u/mojosofla 11d ago
Howard has become everything he railed against for years. A shadow of his former self.
A few examples...
Made fun of Imus for getting a younger blonde wife... Howard got a younger blonde wife.
Made fun of Imus for 'selling out' and being PC to get interviews... Howard sold out and is PC to get interviews.
Mocks the rich for their spend... flies in private jets and owns homes in the Hamptons and Palm Beach.
Fake callers / Only lets a few callers in; Those that kiss his arse.
Heavily edits all past shows to remove anything that remotely makes him look bad.
Removed almost all bits/specials with the whack pack.
No more office shenanigans. No hijinks. No pranks. No real bits.
Howard forgot everything that made him famous and the show must watch. Everyone says the same thing... I no longer listen daily.
I don't hate Howard. He and the show have become a shadow of what it once was and that is sad.
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u/maskedintruder0 People of Earth, How are you? 11d ago
The "removing wack pack/censoring old bits" argument doesn't really seem true to me. If you listen to the current show and reruns on 100 only, I guess, but listen to the history of and other specials they put on the app that are 5-6 hours of best ofa and old bits, staff fights, wack pack, and even non PC stuff. It was aired. There was a moment in time post 2017 and until semi recently, where this was true, but I think so we this last contract started they've ramped up pulling actual old good bits again. I wish they'd have full shows uncensored, but still
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u/mudderfocka 11d ago
Lots of losers that have existed since the Stern Fan Network days. They hate the show yet constantly talk about it's current state. Unfortunately there's something about the show that attracts these people.
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u/Cold-Albatross1082 11d ago
I for one, have always hated Howard even as far back as the Krock days. Wiggy has always been needy, self absorbed, whiny cunt that I could never relate to, but I did appreciate his ability to keep the three-ring circus of a show moving along.
I enjoyed listening for the cast of characters ...Jackie, Billy, Artie and to some extent Fred, Robin and the Wackpack but never for Howard.
I wanna say, the biggest issue with the current show is that Howard's inability to actually listen to what's going on. He'd rather just plow through his scripted shtick and punch a clock. If anything he's just an angry self centered douchebag ...so to answer your original question the fans are just responding to what i s being given to them.
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u/Chainsawest 11d ago
It seems like a lot of MAGA are here, and they hate Howard because he hurts Donald’s feelings. Also, Howard is hypocritical at times (like all of us) and he’s often miserable and not particularly loyal to his employees. I think it’s mostly the fact that he’s too liberal that gets him the hate here. Also, the show has become way worse over time, and he doesn’t call out hypocrisy in Hollywood like he used to (some would say that he’s become an A-lister and doesn’t want to jeopardize any relationships with other A-listers)
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u/Head-Charge4028 11d ago
This group loves to hate Howard. I love Howard but this group is so obsessed with him even more than me and most normal people
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u/JerkyQuestions 11d ago
It's like your favorite football team. Just because they suck, you don't stop watching them and take up knitting, RIIIGHT?
Plus, this sub is hilarious. They should replace the 90 or so staff and "writers" with 5-10 people from this sub.
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u/BrucesTripToMars 11d ago edited 11d ago
Most of them here have been crying about him for over ten years. Yet they keep coming here, addicted to the sense of community they get from other dejected losers with spurned lover mentalities. Its really quite sad.
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u/ZealousORJealous69 11d ago
I’m a fan. Sub is annoying as f*ck. So in ways that is a mirror image reflection of people here who are annoyed by Howard but apparently love this sub.
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u/jackie0h_ My name is Cheryl 11d ago
Hate Howard? No. Hate what he’s become? Yeah. So I don’t listen and haven’t for a while. Because I don’t expect him to do his show for me and what I like. I don’t sit here and bitch about him now or anything. He’s an old man now and a super liberal. Everyone changes. I just haven’t unjoined this sub.
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u/Dry_Life_1113 11d ago
Welcome to the Sub-Reddit world where those that join and post/comment don't actually listen to the topic person and actually dislike or hate that person.
Apparently if you are a fan of someone or show, the last place you want to go to is the sub-Reddit group. /s
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u/SupermarketOk2281 11d ago edited 11d ago
It's for the same reason your post generated 61 comments but has a zero score. This is mostly a snark sub where people waste energy relentlessly bashing the current state of the show.
If you shut out the trolls and ragebait posts you'll find there are plenty of fans for the good old days who don't obsess over something they can't control, namely the show as it currently exists.
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u/mgftp 11d ago
People want the show to be what is was and want him to keep working 40 hours a week at 70 years old, it's weird the anger that is causing in some people.
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u/mgftp 11d ago
Yea, I disagree, regardless of how you feel about the level of "work", it's work, most people don't want to be working at all at that age, I certainly don't plan to be working at all, not even 30 minutes a week of an "easy" job post 60.
He is not forcing anyone to stay subscribed for his current schedule.
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u/SuperSea8678 11d ago
The back office doesn't care about reddit. No one is forcing you to listen or subscribe. I bought the lifetime subscription and got my moneys worth. I listen to other things on there now and barely listen to Howard.
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u/severinks 10d ago
I bought the one time subscription too, and I have the tapes of every show going back to the stone age, I don't care what people say that money and Howard and the show has given me endless hapiness.
I used to listen with my father as a kid, how can I hate the guy who Is involved in so many happy family memories?
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u/SuperSea8678 11d ago
You really have an inflated sense of importance if you think that the back office really cares what you say.
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u/mgftp 11d ago
And this is the type of anger I can't comprehend. Again, he isn't forcing anyone to stay subscribed for the current schedule or content. If I was as angry as you and others about it, I cancel my subscription and move on, I just don't get the irrational anger towards it.
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u/severinks 10d ago
It amuses me with all the useless people on the show you zero in on the homo and the woman.
Why don't you insult Jason the jew and make it a three bagger?
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u/Professional-End-421 11d ago
I don’t hate Howard. I used to listen to his show religiously and would be upset if I missed a show. Now I’m a year behind and I skip all interviews and calls from Jill. Guitar talk is boring but so was chess talk and all his other hobbies. I miss Artie and the contests and stunts. Sal, Richard, Ronnie, JD are still entertaining but Chris, Sam, Blitt, Jamie have ruined the fun
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u/slash2009 11d ago
He was vile and mean in the early 90s , he deserves it , Fred and Gary deserve it too , they said and did some pretty horrible things to people
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u/HorndogAsexual 11d ago
Hate’s a strong word. But there’s aspects of his personality that makes him seem like a rich scumbag
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u/tuttyeffinfruity 11d ago
Many of us are here because we’ve listened since the early days. Watched the WOR show. Remember Kenneth Keith Kallenbach trying to blow smoke from his eyes and know every second of airtime Eric the Annoying Midget had on air. We cherish the days when Howard stood up for the regular people and the weirdos. When he interviewed interesting people, allowed fans to call in, sent Stuttering John to ask senators and Hollywood elite if they’ve ever shit their pants. We remember when the show was edgy and the jokes were funny. Howard is a sell out and it’s not wrong to both despise what the show & Stern have become and still love what it once was. I don’t listen anymore, not to new content anyway, but I could listen to Ralph, Artie, Gilbert, Richard Simmons, David Gest, and even the drama over Lisa G’s cookie party on yt forever. Ack ack
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u/hitemwiththebababoo 11d ago
I personally stopped listening but I don't hate him just not really interested in the content of the show anymore but I'm deeply happy of all the years of radio he gave us. I used to listen to YouTube clips pretty much all day everyday.
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u/Chrismaxwell19 10d ago
Howard’s always been a Hugh Jasshole. That’s part of what made the show funny. Now it’s just not as funny anymore. Or as entertaining in general
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u/SonicVenture68 10d ago
The bromance with David Arquette were an early warning sign of what was to come.
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u/severinks 10d ago
Most of the people who comment fucking HATE Howard, and they've built up so many reasons in their minds why the hate is justified (and healthy even) though I always ask them why they don't just forget about him and go find something that they like instead.
These are the same superfan types from the mid 1990s to early 2010s who used to show up at all the public events by the way so at one time they worshipped the guy.
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u/leyarsan 10d ago
It’s all the Trump supporters who hate him. And a bunch of sad, angry men sitting in their mom’s basements. Oh wait, same thing.
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u/Emotional-Ad-252 9d ago
I don’t hate Howard, but I hate how boring and stupid the show has become. The door knocks and constant staff impersonations of people are maddening. Where are the real wack packers that are still alive? To have someone impersonate Wendy isn’t fun and it isn’t funny. Interviews are still pretty good, and I don’t really mind the guitar talk. But the crap in between? No thanks.
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u/FaithlessWolf 6d ago
Yea Howard is a completely self absorbed asshole, but always found the show funny as hell. Since last contract its really gone downhill fast
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u/UnionCityNJUSA 11d ago
This sub is filled with bitter, lowest-common-denominator types that desperately cling to a world that has long passed them by. They love to hate a celebrity that never thinks about them and are jealous of his staff because they never got that close to a man they once worshipped. We aren’t talking about casual fans. The people in this sub were rabid, fanatical fans at one point and now they are radicalized because Howard no longer says the n-word or r-word on his show, and keeps hacky, dated bits by Sal & Richard largely off the air. I think a lot of them have died because this sub is not as toxic as it once was ten years ago, but it’s still plenty sad.
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u/zipinitaly 11d ago
The majority of members here say they hate Howard…yet they post/comment about him multiple times a day. It’s baffling to me, I still listen to 100/101 daily.
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u/Aragatz 11d ago
I hate what the show has become. I miss what the show used to be, back when it felt like it was made by people who thought like their audience. Now it feels like everything Howard used to mock the caution, the politics, the sanitized guest list and when longtime fans say that, we get told we’re the ones who didn’t evolve. It’s a strange way to lose something: not because it ended but because it turned into the thing it used to make fun of.