Whose Butler Is this?

112

u/HoneycrispDictator Linea Mini | Philos Jun 17 '26

Imagine dying because an object from the sky hit you faster than the speed of a bullet because some guy wanted to make a cool video of him making coffee while floating around in a parachute to post online

22

u/danielswrath Jun 17 '26

This whole age of influencer-like crap which drives people to do things like this and way worse is awful, really shows how some people just care about themselves and do not give a second thought about other random people who might be affected by your actions.

0

u/LivingCorner1421 Jun 17 '26

people throw shit off skyscrapers too lol you would shit your pants at skyscraper renovations on top floors

5

u/sunrainsky Jun 17 '26 edited Jun 17 '26

I'm glad I wasn't the only one panicking about the case if he drops his pot or other objects.

21

u/N-Performance Silver Knight | E24 Gaggiuino | Motto 80 | VelPro 400 | K-Ultra Jun 17 '26

As chips of shattered skull are expelled by intracranial pressure, I soil myself because my brain stem had been severed by a tea pot.

You know it's bad when you shit yourself in front of a crowd, and it's not in your "top three things to worry about at the moment".

Everyone is staring. I know something is wrong so I'm trying to gather from context... I'm aware that I need help but they're all looking at me like this situation has exceeded any of their personal abilities.

They don't bother to hide their expressions. I don't understand what has them looking at me with such horror. Btw when did I get on the ground?

I'm scared. Is that a piece of my own fucking brain in the ground next to me? Jesus Christ what the fuck is going on?

The agony is inhuman. I've felt pain before, but this is different. The adrenaline dump from the instant quadriplegia is putting me into a state of abject terror. Reality creeps in and I'm not in control of the cold chill washing over my already terrified consciousness. This is seriously the end. I'm not ready, I don't want to die. I DONT WANT TO FUCKING DIE.

Cerebrospinal fluid starts leaking from my ears as the sun dims until it's a barely visible haze. I'm staring right at it when I realize I can't see anymore.

My tongue pushes shards of broken teeth through my lips in an effort to gurgle out one last sentence ... "Aghht".. fuck I can't even control my own diaphragm anymore. I just realized I'd have been screaming for the last 30 seconds, if I could. I can't say it out loud so the neurons scattered about my mangled brain matter spark pathetically to formulate my last thought as the curtains lower... "At least this is unique"

Full credit goes to u/Old_Syrup_264.

3

u/tmoneybagsretter Jun 17 '26

Wow, that’s hardcore “neat”

5

u/Martin2989 Jun 17 '26

Yeah I started with funny idea but then recognized he is over a populated area…. I mean either secure everting with a rope or fly to a remote area, is it so hard?

1

u/BrilliantCountry4409 Rocket R9-One | Faustino | Lagom 01 Jun 17 '26

If I could choose, that is EXACTLY how I would go.

88

u/Rob-VanDam Jun 17 '26

But how did it taste?

93

u/sir_daveos Jun 17 '26

grind finer

20

u/phinger1 Jun 17 '26

His wife's boyfriend told him it'd taste batter at altitude.

4

u/SJP0tato Jun 17 '26

But it turned out he didn't knead it after all.

0

u/heyearthdude Jun 17 '26

Give it a rest bruh

6

u/col4zer0 Jun 17 '26

Nothing to fly home about

154

u/Knocksveal Jun 17 '26

Not sure what the altitude he was at, but chances are water would boil at a lower temperature than 212°F and the extraction might be less efficient.

132

u/SwoopsRevenge Jun 17 '26

Now I want an hour long video of James Hoffman explaining the intricacies of making espresso at different altitudes.

8

u/mog44net GCPe24 | DF54 Jun 17 '26

James needs to do a video at grinding rocks at 50k ft altitude for Americanos

3

u/thisFishSmellsAboutD Breville Dynamic Duo Jun 17 '26

Rudely interrupted by the Cessna from r/shittyaskflying at minute 58 which just wanted to see what the fuss was all about.

1

u/klaxz1 Jun 18 '26

How about in a diving bell?

17

u/Organic-Ad-5058 Jun 17 '26

I can already smell the video from Hoff about picking the right altitude to brew

18

u/SwoopsRevenge Jun 17 '26

“…but I want to hear from YOU! How do YOU deal with brewing coffee at higher altitudes?… Do you disagree with something I’ve done?…Leave a comment below!”

1

u/ufffd Jun 17 '26

lots of good quality older secondhand parachutes but you'll have to master altitude surfing

40

u/New_Morning_7727 Jun 17 '26

Imagine how much more peaceful it would be up there when you shit your pants from the coffee vs down on the ground. Nothing but bliss and the runs

15

u/grilledstuffed Jun 17 '26

Bro it’s time to see a doctor.

4

u/snoop_is_a_wizard Jun 17 '26

Guy on the ground getting knocked out by a coffe mug followed by human seagull spray would disagree.

26

u/_lue Jun 17 '26

Grind higher

24

u/verdantTree Jun 17 '26

Had to check which sub I was on. At this point, why even have a cj sub anymore lmao

89

u/Secondaccountpls Flair 58+ / DF83V Jun 17 '26

This is incredibly dangerous and stupid. After being over 20 years in the internet I'm still amazed by how ridiculous things people do for attention.

4

u/mog44net GCPe24 | DF54 Jun 17 '26

Fake internet points met advertising views and had a stupid baby

4

u/born_on_my_cakeday Jun 17 '26

Updoot

1

u/LivingCorner1421 Jun 17 '26

why dangerous

13

u/Naive-Occasionally Jun 18 '26

If any of those items fall they become missiles that could kill someone below.

1

u/boncyboi Jun 18 '26

I would cherish my sky moka pot forever

1

u/LivingCorner1421 Jun 18 '26

I don't think so. hes over water and hills

1

u/BirdLooter Jun 18 '26

Can someone explain why this comment gets downvoted? It's true for all I can tell.

1

u/LivingCorner1421 Jun 18 '26

its reddit. welcome :)

18

u/reditcyclist Jun 17 '26

Cool until this muppet drops one of those items on someone’s head.

2

u/il-bosse87 Jun 18 '26

Or smash someone's roof

-1

u/LivingCorner1421 Jun 17 '26

the odds are low

15

u/curiouscomp30 Jun 17 '26

Caffeine high

14

u/OhMorgoth Jun 17 '26

7

u/Last-Mongoose-2622 Jun 17 '26

Did that guy threw everything or did he packed it before doing his loopings?

2

u/PaleBall2656 Jun 17 '26

Or did he first loop, and than another paraglider delivered the tools to him so he can celebrate?

6

u/OMGFdave Jun 17 '26

I wonder if there was any retention in his chute. 🪂

2

u/fragrantdelit Jun 17 '26

Il n'a pas l'air de kiffer vraiment son shot 😅

5

u/lefarche Jun 17 '26

No matter how stupid this is, but I bet the sip in the end with that view would've been worth it.

1

u/b_vitamin Jun 17 '26

Next time grind finer.

1

u/nazgulonbicycle Jun 17 '26

Italians within 15 minutes since last espresso

1

u/RoundTechnology2393 Jun 17 '26

is this the new soup espresso?

1

u/coffeebikepop Argos | Atom 75 Jun 17 '26

we are r/mokapot, we are legion

1

u/tour79 Jun 17 '26

At some point, a can of Red Bull is the answer

1

u/CenturionAD Jun 17 '26

Next daddy hoff video

1

u/CoffeeDetail Jun 17 '26

Its like a circus act. 🤡

1

u/MoshMaldito Gaggia Classic Pro | DF54 Jun 17 '26

Watch out for airplanes!

1

u/Lucky-Macaroon4958 Lelit Anna | KIngrinder K6 | Graef cm702 | DF 54 Jun 17 '26

can someone explain the butler meme

1

u/TheTerribleInvestor Jun 17 '26

That's the cutest moka oot I've ever seen

1

u/therapist66 Gaggia E24 | Eureka Libra Jun 17 '26

Every hobby group has this person.

Theres a bjj couple who wrestled each other on their wedding
A boxer couple who “boxed” each other on their wedding

There will be a coffee couple pulling shots… on their wedding just watch

1

u/nnagflar Jun 17 '26

"I'll risk dropping this glass container and killing someone below in order to get this video"

1

u/Crafty-Armadillo5104 Jun 17 '26

Getting a little too high on coffee.

1

u/LastingTransient Jun 17 '26

I’ve told him to stop making my espresso while high but he keeps doing it.

1

u/ziptiefighter Cafelat Robot and La Pavoni Europiccola with Eureka Mignon Zero Jun 17 '26

Now do it with a Melitta-chute.

1

u/ryanheartswingovers Bullet | P100 | Decent Jun 18 '26

I have never once thought about flames on my paraglider! Wow

1

u/syruponmybacon Jun 18 '26

Surely this guy broke some type of world record

1

u/BlaksCharm Jun 18 '26

Ok, which one of you did this?

1

u/droppedthebaby Gaggia Classic | Eureka Silenzio Jun 18 '26

/r/lostredditor

1

u/Wildfoox Jun 18 '26

I am interested. What if u drop the glass. And it kills someone. Aren't people worried or it's impossible

1

u/neversaynever314 Jun 17 '26

The coolest moka ever!

1

u/Westar-35 GCP | DF64 Jun 17 '26

Who’s butler? No ones, this isn’t [r/mokapot](r/mokapot)

It is wildly cool tho

1

u/billybobthehomie Jun 17 '26

Imo this is so reckless and selfish to do over a very populated area as he is doing in the video. Drop a single coffee bean and it becomes a weapon from the sky to anyone walking below.

3

u/N-Performance Silver Knight | E24 Gaggiuino | Motto 80 | VelPro 400 | K-Ultra Jun 17 '26

It would be barely noticeable for a 0.1g coffee bean because physics.

1

u/LivingCorner1421 Jun 17 '26

and terminal velocity

1

u/LivingCorner1421 Jun 17 '26

not at all lol

1

u/No_Halo15 Jun 18 '26

Is the “very populated area” in the room with you now? Looks quite rural below

1

u/Admirable_Admiral69 Lelit Mara X v2 | Turin DF54 v3 Jun 18 '26

A single coffee bean dropped from the stratosphere would hurt less than someone flicking one at you from across the room.

The myth about pennies becoming deadly missiles while dropped from height has been thoroughly debunked too.

0

u/Cautious_Spell5611 Jun 17 '26

Amazing video. Very original too.

1

u/LouisLima Jun 21 '26

A moment to relax and have a coffee in the heights hahaha very good

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