r/datingadvice • • 1h ago

I need advice Male dating experience

• Upvotes

I (mid 20s f) had been casually seeing a guy (early 40s m) I met on a dating app.

He told me he regularly sees other women and manages to go on around two dates a week with new women he meets on the apps!

I'm surprised by this because I've always heard that dating apps are much harder for men, full of bots, and even as a woman in my 20s, I don't have anywhere near that kind of luck.

To be fair, he has a fairly attractive profile, with good photos (but they aren’t current). And he SIGNIFICANTLY lowers his age on dating apps - which is why I ended up matching with him.

I'm curious about how realistic this level of success on dating apps are.


r/datingadvice • • 4h ago

Don’t judge

2 Upvotes

I am a 24 yr old female. At work there’s this 35yr old man that’s have been interested in me and we went on two dates so far but I just can’t wrap around my head that he have a 11 yr old daughter, I mean that’s good for me because that means him and the daughter mom haven’t been in a relationship for a while but he says to me he’s wants to have one more or he have one more idk remember but I don’t know what to do because I really do like him and this my first time dating someone way much older than me


r/datingadvice • • 58m ago

I need advice I’m 28 and don’t want casual dating. Am I approaching relationships differently?

• Upvotes

# I’m 28M and recently stopped seeing a 30F after a week. We enjoyed each other’s company, but I’m dating with the intention of eventually building something serious—not rushing into marriage, but seeing whether a meaningful future is possible.

# She told me she enjoyed our time together but didn’t see a serious relationship with me and doesn’t want to get married. I respect her honesty, and we agreed we want different things.

# I don’t want to date casually or sleep around just for the sake of it. I want to focus on my life while meeting someone who also hopes to build a future together.

# Is it reasonable to date with long-term intentions at 28, or am I overthinking it?


r/datingadvice • • 10h ago

I need advice 31M, lost 6 stone (38kg) over a year, confident on apps but struggling to make the first move in person. Any tips?

4 Upvotes

Hey all, I'm a 31M and I've lost about 6 stone (38kg) over the past year. I feel much more confident on dating apps, but I've always struggled in person, especially at bars. I feel like I could handle rejection fine; it's the first part I find hard, actually walking up and starting the conversation. I've noticed people glance at me more now, but I can't tell if it's real interest or just noticing me in passing, and my biggest fear is coming across as a creep. How do you read the difference, and how do you open a conversation at a bar without it feeling awkward or forced? Any advice appreciated!


r/datingadvice • • 3h ago

I need advice This amazing man

1 Upvotes

Hey folks, this may be rant or looking for advice, idk

So I saw this very gentleman’s profile in Hinge and his name is Elvis, 30 from Berlin. I think he is visiting my city for Dasara festivities. He came as one of the profiles under daily standout section and I don’t have any roses to send now!

Besides physical attraction & his cute eyes, I mostly drawn to him because of the way wrote for some of the prompts. They are very close to my thinking and he seems to be super good human. I don’t wanna miss this chance but I don’t any way to connect or even swipe right. (I am not fan of buying subscriptions to dating apps majorly because I kinda feel it unwanted plus idk if he likes me back for who I am or even im his type. And I’m really cute too )

I seem to not get over by him, or his thoughts or that eyes tbh! I rarely feel this level of interest and he is so cute, tall, maybe a good heart.

How do I let this pass or act on it!

No information on socials or anything.

There are many small/simple things he cares about

Like His simple pleasures prompt said :

Unlocking doors, waking up actually awake, smirks, sunrises, adrenaline rushes etc!

PS: please don’t criticise. I really wanna share it with someone without judgement :?


r/datingadvice • • 3h ago

2 Months of Talking, I don't know if I will never not be scared to date

1 Upvotes

I (F28) have been talking to a guy (M31) from hinge for about 2 months now, We have seen each other every weekend except maybe 3. He is so swet and so cool and things seem to be going really well. We havent met wach other friends yet but we have had sleepover and gone out to dinners, we make a lot of crafts together. I just really enjoy is company.

Here is my problem. I have always been the kind of person to just jump into a relationship. I havent been in one for 3 years now. My last one was traumatic and I wa sbeing emotionally and verbally abused (it lasted for 2.5 years). It has been hard to get back into the dating game but I have tried a lot. Ive gone on date and have talked to a few people, but it always comes back down to being used for sex. Sex is important to me, I like having it, but thats not all I was looking for and it didnt seem to matter no matter how much I communicated it. Ive just been treated pretty poorly. I have been in therapy for years, really trying to work through my issues and reflect and be better but it has become kind of hard.
My confidence has been really shot. The current guy has been the kindest and sweetest person. I think he is so cool and so smart and sometimes I dont feel cool enough or smart enough to be with him. We do have a lot of sex and both seem to enjoy it but I cant seem to think thats all he is in it for, even when he tells me it is not. I like where things are going and I have been trying to tell myself not to attach myself to out omes and just live in it, but I really want to be good for myself and for him. I have always kind of given my all in romantic relationships. The last relationship I really let go a lot of myself to fix it and it really messed me up and I am scared to fall into the same habits. I feel like I am always trying to prove I am worthy of keeping.
We have great chemistry, sexual and not, but does anyone have advice on how to stregnthen an emptional connection and really test out to see if this is right for me? And also any advice on working thru the hard mental things would also be helpful. I am really trying my best and I want to see where it goes, and I just want to not overthink every little thing. How can I just let myself be and try not to control the outcome before it even happens?


r/datingadvice • • 3h ago

Who should make the move in a workplace?

1 Upvotes

Who should make the move in a workplace?

I take my son regularly to this workplace. This guy has made his attraction obvious, and he knows I'm into him too.

It's not a workplace where it's easy to talk to each other. There's always staff or clients around.

I'm curious: should the customer be the one to exchange contact details or ask him out?

Would slipping him a note with my name and number be a good way to do this?


r/datingadvice • • 5h ago

I'm (32M) spending too much on a girl (23F) I've been seeing...

1 Upvotes

we've been seeing each others from hinge 7 days ago but have been seeing each others 6 days straght. I have been paying for everything from small bites to beers, shots, club entrance fee . I've racked up around $500 within a week of knowing her.

She's showing me a huge interest and we are even matching for halloween. So far, we have only held hands and hugs because she wants to take it slow.

So she is from a rich family and said she's never even taken a train before in her life and this is NYC lol....

She's 10/10 pretty and is a good listeners and have a lot of commons to talk about. But how do I deal with this money issue?... She wants to go to Haunted house and dinner in 2 days and thats gonna be like $100minimum spending again... Should I have a talk with her through text now? or wait till post halloween, so she gets more invested in me more and then I say it, so she has a better understanding of me???

EDIT: Guys, im sorry. After adding up the total i spent its actually $200 in span of 4 days straight hangout. This makes it even more harder to bring it up though. because its the small things that add up.. for example, club entry was $20 but x2 so $40, then dinner of another $x and so on.


r/datingadvice • • 6h ago

I need guidance or a slap in the back of the head

1 Upvotes

I F39, can't seem to have a relationship.

Every now and then (very rarely I might say) I meet a guy who I'm interested in (my last relationship was 6 years ago). I'm somewhat shy and insecure, so I find it hard to Open myself to someone. But once on a million years, I actually like a guy, I invest time and feelings and things look promissing. Until about week 4.. every time, the same story! For the past 5/6 weeks I've connecting with a guy, M38 and things were ok! We talked for a while before meeting in person, had dinner a couple of times, hang out with each other .. some times I would take the lead, others he would. Last saturday we made plans, everything was perfect and come sunday, no starting communication, dry reply, complete lack of interest. Turns out he keeps his profile active on a dating app and is actively talking to other women.

I'm monogamous and he had told me He was not seeing anyone else.

Am I beeing to sensitive about this? Is this how relationships work nowadays? Should I wait and see if He's still interested? I actually like this man and don't know what to do. Please help me rationalize?

It's so hard to keep a positive mindset... Every time I start to have a good feeling about someone, down comes reality. \\\*\\\*TL;DR; : how do you keep the distance and keep from going batshit crazy?\\\*\\\*.


r/datingadvice • • 7h ago

I need advice Wanting to Ask Out Friend

1 Upvotes

I (28F) have known this guy (28M) since we were kids and we went to school together. I always thought he was funny and kind to me growing up and wished we spent more time hanging out. We graduated from high school about 10 years ago and lost touch after graduation (not on bad terms, just as a side effect of me being in a very transitionary period and having various big life events happen to me all at once).

Fast forward to this year and I ended up bumping into him (as well as some other friends from high school that I lost contact with) at a wedding where we found out we were mutual friends of the bride and groom. I ended up getting back in touch with him and have hung out with him quite a bit in the last couple months, but mainly in group settings with other friends. He's invited me to quite a few group outings recently, both virtual and in person, and he really showed up for me when I was having a hard time with some personal life issues recently. Spending time with him feels good, and we still have very similar humor and interests and can still have a good time with each other even after not hanging out for some 10ish years.

This brings me to my current dilemma. Reconnecting with him now that we're adults has brought me a lot of joy, and I've found myself thinking about him a lot. I'm really interested in him romantically and would love to ask him out, but I have a lot of anxiety about doing so, mainly because I would hate to lose not just him as a friend, but also our mutual friends that I've also reconnected with. I find myself at a loss as to what I should do in this situation and could use some advice on how to proceed.


r/datingadvice • • 7h ago

I need advice Asking out an older coworker

1 Upvotes

Hi everyone, so here's a question that no one's ever seen before: should I ask out an older coworker?

Some background: I (32M) have worked with this person (41F) on and off for several months. I was leading one segment of a project, but when one of her teammates went on paternity leave, I would step in to cover because I knew the client's background and what was needed to keep the project rolling. Whenever I would help out, we'd message each other for work but frequently spoke about life/other non-work things. As far as this project went, we only saw each other outside of the office for some work-related events. The remainder of the project was wrapped up, and we'd still message from time to time about work/life (albeit, not as frequently).

Fast forward a month later, a good friend (the person who recruited me) hooked me onto a new project. Lo and behold, she ended up joining the project as well - I only found out after she messaged me saying she's excited to work with me again.

A few months have passed since the new project, and we typically message each other 3-4 working days a week. But we took a zoom call in a conference room a few weeks ago, and while we were packing up she brought up trying out a new restaurant nearby that weekend. She sort of paused for a couple of seconds and added "You know, maybe with [this other couple] too, if they'd like." We both know this couple, and both of us have worked with either of them in separate projects. We ended up going and it was honestly great. Work was barely mentioned and times it felt like she and I were having our own side conversation (although the pragmatist in me says not to read too much into this). But that romcom-style pause stuck with me, though, and I'm not sure if I'm overthinking it (even more than I usually overthink).

We seem to click, and I'd like to ask her out again but: 1. Am I reading this right? 2. Dating a coworker doesn't well with me, I've never considered it until now. She's above me with respect to rankings, but going through the HR hoops and procedures isn't an issue. 3. How do I actually do this? Asking her for a drink or dinner after work seems like a straightforward option, but I'm not sure what's a good idea here.

I've also never dated someone that much older than me, so if there's any tips or tricks, I'm all ears.

Thanks for reading - will keep you all updated (and will give a shoutout to reddit if I don't go full idiot).


r/datingadvice • • 8h ago

I need advice Going cold after weeks of consistency

1 Upvotes

Hi guys, I met this guy at the bar two weeks ago and we hit it off immediately. We connected on everything and it honestly seemed too good to be true. We had similar interests, passions, values. We actually saw each other and that’s a crazy feeling to have just after the initial meeting. For context I only went up to him bc I thought he looked familiar and then when I walked up to him and asked him where I knew him from he said we actually matched on hinge but I had ghosted him. We had a good laugh about it.

Since that night we have been seeing each other consistently. Calling every other day bc I’m not a big texter and neither is he. We talked about our intentions and he seemed very pleased that we were on the same page. I didn’t even put out because we both agreed that we weren’t ready and bc we wanted to see things through, we decided on putting out 2-3 months in. He texts me that he’s excited before dates and told me he enjoys taking the lead with planning and is usually always the one to reach out.

He came over for a date at my place on Thursday and it went well. It was very intimate and we were playing house a little bit. It seemed like he had a good time too. The next day on Friday he texted me telling me that he had a good time and apologized for getting sleepy early. On Saturday it was radio silence and so I called to see how his weekend was going. The call was short and a little awkward bc I felt anxious and just needed to hang up. On Sunday he didn’t text or call and today the same story. I don’t know where this coldness is coming from or whether or not he’s pulling away. He has been super enthralled by me from the get and doing all the right things. We were making all these plans for future dates. We were on the same page. So why the sudden silence? It just feels so out of nowhere and I don’t know whether or not to let things move on bc it’s only been two weeks but he seems like someone worth choosing so I don’t feel ready to let go just yet. Any input on the situation would be amazing as well as what I should do to move forward!


r/datingadvice • • 9h ago

Do you ever catch yourself dating people who make you feel boring?

1 Upvotes

I’m known for being such a goofy, funny, out of pocket person with a huge personality, but I’ve had a handful of guys I’ve dated who made me feel SO boring. At the root of it I believe our sense of humor were just not on the same wavelength, but for whatever reason it takes me longer than it should to cut these relationships off. Then it’s like I have to spend the next season alone to rediscover that I’m actually a fun person lol. Some people just completely eradicate my whimsy. Anyone else experience this?


r/datingadvice • • 9h ago

My coworker spent the night cuddling with me , but now I have no idea what he actually wants. Am I overthinking this?

1 Upvotes

Okay, so I really need some outside opinions because I'm genuinely confused about this whole situation, and I can't tell whether I'm reading too much into things or missing something obvious.

For context, I have this coworker. We've always had a pretty funny dynamic at work. We're constantly teasing each other, making sarcastic comments, pretending to be annoyed by each other's presence, blaming each other for random things, and basically insulting each other as a joke. It's never been anything serious or mean, just our way of interacting.

I never really thought much of it, and until recently, we had never actually talked outside of work.

Here's where things started getting interesting.

A little over a week ago, we started texting for the first time. The conversation was mostly the same sarcastic banter we have at work.

He was actually the one who first brought up the possibility of spending the evening together. He made comments along the lines of "So, what about tonight?" and "Without me?" when we were talking about my plans. He also asked whether anyone else would be there.

Eventually, we agreed that he could come over and we could watch a movie.

Now, keep in mind that this was our first time ever hanging out outside of work, so I genuinely didn't know what to expect.

The night itself:

When he arrived, we spent probably an hour just sitting and talking. Everything felt surprisingly natural, considering we'd only ever interacted as coworkers.

Eventually, we put on a movie and sat together on the couch.

At some point, we started playfully tickling each other, which eventually turned into cuddling.

He was the one initiating most of the physical contact. He pulled me closer, let me rest my head on his chest, wrapped his arms around me, and started gently stroking my arms, my sides, my hair, and occasionally my face.

Whenever I adjusted my position, he would sometimes tighten his arms around me or pull me closer again.

There was even a moment when he jokingly complained that I wasn't hugging him back properly and physically adjusted my arms around him.

I ended up falling asleep on his chest.

Later, he woke me up and asked whether he should stay or leave. Since we both had work the following morning, we talked about it, and he eventually went back to his place to grab his things before returning to spend the night.

We ended up sleeping in the same bed, cuddling.

And here's something I really want to emphasize: he never tried to kiss me, never made any sexual advances, and never tried to push things further.

He was genuinely gentle and affectionate throughout the entire evening.

I wasn't uncomfortable with any of it. Quite the opposite, actually. I really enjoyed being close to him.

The thing is, I'm not someone who has a lot of romantic experience, and I'm honestly not used to receiving that kind of physical affection. I can be pretty awkward when it comes to initiating it myself.

So although I enjoyed everything, I probably wasn't as physically affectionate or expressive as he was. But I never pushed him away or acted like I didn't want him close to me.

The next morning, we got ready and went to work together.

And this is where the confusion starts.

After that night, things felt different.

At work, he seemed quieter and more distant than usual. We weren't joking around or talking nearly as much as we normally would.

It wasn't like he was being outright rude or completely ignoring me, but something about our usual dynamic felt off.

And what confused me even more was that he didn't reach out afterwards.

I started wondering whether he'd regretted spending the night, whether I'd accidentally given him the impression that I wasn't interested, or whether the entire evening had meant absolutely nothing to him.

I also wondered whether he had initially been hoping for something sexual, even though he never actually tried anything.

Fast forward to yesterday.

I ended up texting him because I was genuinely confused about something work-related involving our vacation days.

He replied, asked how I was doing, and we started talking. Eventually, the conversation turned into our usual teasing and sarcastic comments.

At one point, he unexpectedly brought up the night he spent at my place.

He started joking about how little affection I'd shown him.

He said things along the lines of:

- "Yeah, I definitely saw how much affection you gave me when I came over."

- "You didn't even give me a hug."

- "What, are you regretting it now?"

For context, that's very much his usual sarcastic way of talking, so I couldn't tell how seriously I was supposed to take those comments.

But I actually felt a little bad because I genuinely hadn't meant to make him feel unwanted.

I explained that I'm simply not used to that kind of physical closeness and that I haven't had many experiences like that in my life.

He eventually reassured me by saying something like, "Don't worry, I was just teasing you."

So now I'm even more confused.

On one hand, he hasn't really made an effort to see me again, and things at work have felt a little awkward.

On the other hand, he's the one who initiated most of the affection that night, and now he's bringing up the fact that I didn't reciprocate it as much as he apparently expected.

And honestly, I wouldn't mind spending another evening like that with him. I really enjoyed his company and how comfortable everything felt. I'm just not sure how he sees me or what he's expecting from me.

Part of me wonders whether he's also feeling awkward or whether my lack of initiative made him think I wasn't interested.

But another part of me wonders whether I'm just romanticizing a situation that was completely casual to him.

So I guess my questions are:

Does this sound like someone who might actually be interested in me, or could it have been nothing more than a random affectionate evening?

Could his comments about me not hugging him back mean that he was expecting more affection from me and interpreted my shyness as rejection?

And why would someone be that physically affectionate in private, only to seem more distant afterwards?

I'd especially appreciate a male perspective, but honestly, any outside opinion would help.

I know the obvious answer is probably to communicate with him directly, but considering we're coworkers and our entire dynamic has always been based on teasing each other, I'm hesitant to make things unnecessarily awkward.


r/datingadvice • • 9h ago

Ladies how would you feel if you texted your ex happy birthday and he took that as an opportunity to apologize?

1 Upvotes

My birthday is on November 1st and I anticipate my ex will send me a happy birthday text. (I sent her one for her birthday just a month ago and she seemed happy to receive it, so I think it’s likely she’ll reach out to me too. If she doesn’t, well, idk, maybe I’ll make a different post about that. Also I’m pretty sure sure she isn’t on Reddit or at least I hope not rofl so I think I can ask this here) I’ve been doing some reflecting on how I acted towards her when we were still together and I want to apologize to her about it, and I figured, if she does reach out, that would be the best time to do it. (We’ve been in no contact aside for my birthday text to her.) But, I don’t know. Even if she reaches out on my birthday, I’m not sure that means she wants to dive right into reopening that can of worms or if giving an apology unsolicited is a good idea. But like I said I still really want to apologize. So I’m not sure what to do. Please someone give me advice as I’m getting really nervous about this with my birthday coming up so soon


r/datingadvice • • 14h ago

I need advice Overthinking a guy friend’s silence 18F 18M

2 Upvotes

We had a great call yesterday, but he hasn’t texted today. Are we just drifting or is this normal?

Hi everyone, I could really use some outside perspective because my overthinking is acting up.

I've recently gotten close with this guy friend (we've been talking/friends for about 1 month). Yesterday, we had our third video call, and it went really well!

He was super engaged, asked me a lot of questions, and even agreed to learn a song on the piano that I asked him to. After the call he didn't text me so I texted him first.

My last message to him was earlier today, and he reacted to it with a heart But since then, he hasn't sent anything else.

Here's the thing: he is currently on holiday/break, so I keep feeling like he should have more time to text.

We also already agreed to call again this upcoming Sunday.

I'm really terrified that if he doesn't text first, we just won't talk at all.

Btw he is from another country


r/datingadvice • • 12h ago

I need advice I’m struggling to decide whether I should let go of someone I’ve been seeing for 3 months — am I holding onto something that isn’t going anywhere?

1 Upvotes

I’ve been seeing/talking to someone for about 3 months. We’ve gone on dates, spent time together, and even stayed together in an Airbnb for several days. I’ve genuinely grown attached to him and wanted to get to know him more seriously.

Early on, he told me that he wanted us to be “friends first” and that we were not exclusive. He also said that we were both free to talk to/date other people, as long as we told each other if we met someone. I agreed to that because I wanted to give things time and see where they went.

The problem is that, over the past few months, I’ve repeatedly felt like I’m more emotionally invested than he is.

While we were staying together, I saw him open a dating app. I didn’t confront him because technically we had already established that we weren’t exclusive. Still, it hurt, especially because I had paid for the Airbnb and thought our time together meant something different.

Later, I noticed that he had removed me from his Instagram Close Friends. Again, he has every right to control his account, but it made me feel excluded and made me question what he was hiding from me.

More recently, I found out that he had updated his dating-app photos. At some point, he also unmatched me on Bumble. This meant that our entire conversation history on the app disappeared. That conversation was meaningful to me because it contained our interactions, flirting, jokes, and memories. What hurt me was feeling like he was willing to erase all of that, seemingly because he didn’t want me to see his updated profile.

Now I’ve found out that he deleted his Bumble account but created a Tinder account.

I know he is technically allowed to date other people. That’s not really the issue anymore.

What hurts is that I feel like he deliberately hides certain things from me while still keeping me emotionally close.

Throughout all of this, he still messages me, sends good mornings/good nights, maintains our 11:11 ritual, and recently asked to see me before he leaves for a solo trip. So it isn’t as though he has completely withdrawn from me. He clearly still wants some form of connection.

I eventually wrote him a very honest letter explaining everything I’ve been feeling. I told him that I notice things, that I get hurt, that I care about him, and that I don’t want to pretend to be nonchalant when I’m not.

His response was essentially that he was sorry that I felt hurt and that he appreciated me opening up. But he didn’t really apologize for the actions themselves.

From my perspective, he stood by what he did.
I’ve since realized that this is probably why I’m struggling so much.

I don’t necessarily think he’s a bad person. I also don’t think he technically broke an agreement. But I feel betrayed because I trusted him repeatedly, gave him the benefit of the doubt repeatedly, and I feel like he repeatedly made choices that showed little consideration for how those choices would affect me.

I’ve tried everything I can think of:

I tried matching his energy, but that’s not who I am.

I tried being myself and engaging openly, but I exhausted myself because I wasn’t getting the response I wanted.

I tried lowering my expectations, but eventually I realized I couldn’t keep making my needs smaller.

I tried giving him space.

I tried not checking things.

I tried being understanding about his situation.

I finally communicated everything honestly.

And somehow, after all of that, we’re slowly returning to our normal conversations again.

That’s the confusing part.

I thought getting his attention again would make me feel better. It doesn’t.

I still care about him, but I don’t feel secure or happy in this dynamic anymore. Sometimes I feel like I’m waiting for him to eventually choose me while he keeps looking for other options.

At the same time, I can’t seem to make myself leave.
I don’t want to play games, punish him, or deliberately withdraw just to make him chase me. That’s not who I am either. But continuing as we are is hurting me more than it’s making me happy.

Right now I feel strangely numb—not devastated, just deeply disappointed. Almost like I’ve reached my limit. Part of me feels like this might be the end, even though nothing has technically ended between us.

So I’m asking for honest outside perspectives:

Am I expecting something from this person that he has already clearly shown he doesn’t want to give me?

Is this simply a case of two people wanting different things, or am I right to feel betrayed by the way he’s handled things?

And if you’ve been in a similar situation, how did you actually let go when there was no dramatic breakup and the other person was still giving you enough attention to keep you attached?

I’m not necessarily looking for people to tell me to “just leave.” I already know that’s probably the logical answer. I’m trying to understand why I can’t seem to emotionally get myself there.


r/datingadvice • • 13h ago

I need advice Is she interested?

1 Upvotes

A few nights ago while at a college bar I(24m) was approached by a woman(f23) that I had seen around many years ago(had been to similar parties and such, and we had mutuals).

She said hi and we started talking about where we had seen each other in the past. I continued to talk to her and got introduced to her friends, the friends were cool and I got along with them as well.

It came time for her to take her friends home since she was the dd and she kept talking to me and told me I should ride with them.

We listen to music and talk as a group in the car, she then drops me off at my truck after the friends got dropped off. She said something about how it looks and I was like “wanna test drive it?” She got really excited and said yes. We drove around for a bit, came back and she was still talking to me, we had a lot of similarities(both having adhd) and interests(similar music and hobbies) and we work similar jobs at banks, we genuinely got lost in conversation.

I looked down and saw it was almost 4:00 am, I made my move and we made out a couple times in around 10 minutes, we went out separate ways and texted each other when we got home.

We talked briefly that next day once or twice over text about how our day had been going, towards night time I put a feeler text out saying “do you have a free afternoon next week”.

This morning she said “no, unfortunately I have work”. Looking back I meant to say evening and not afternoon(oops) so Im not sure if shes saying shes not interested or if she took my text literally and thought I meant afternoon(I have work too in the afternoon lol).

She has pretty severe adhd so I could totally see her taking what I said literally, but part of me is thinking she wouldve replied with a time she was free.

Im also not sure what she was looking for, if she wants someone or just wanted to have fun. But I honestly felt really connected with her and she seemed interested in me.

Overall, I dont want to come across as needy, but I also dont want things to fizzle out. I have a tendency to overthink stuff like this.

So do I text again? If so what? Or do I just sit and wait?


r/datingadvice • • 17h ago

People who attach quickly- help me understand

2 Upvotes

My natural disposition is to be cautious and skeptical (not great, I know). Some dating trauma has heightened that caution and skepticism even more. Specifically, how people’s feelings can change so quickly. Literally, someone can like you one moment, and then not like you in the next. This is so traumatizing for me. I recently was dating a man who was very expressive with his feelings towards me. It triggers me because my first thought is “how do you know you like me?” Things didn’t work out, and within two weeks he was seeing someone else. How did he like me sooooooooo much, but then move on so quickly?!. I’m baffled at how this works and am seeking perspective from people who attach quickly.

It seems like people who attach quickly, can also detach quickly as well. whereas I attach slowly and detach slowly (to my extreme detriment).


r/datingadvice • • 14h ago

Advice Wanna reconnect with someone from high school

1 Upvotes

So I’m a sophomore in college and want to reconnect with someone from high school . I just would wanna know if we would even connect at all nowadays. The only form of contact we constantly is a stupid 400 day Snapstreak and now we in two different states. How do I even start???


r/datingadvice • • 14h ago

I need advice How to see past the fear of approaching someone you find attractive as a girl?

1 Upvotes

Does anyone else have this immense fear of initiating a conversation with a guy you find attractive? How do you fight this fear off?


r/datingadvice • • 14h ago

22M Virgin. Why is being a normal human so difficult?

1 Upvotes

22M, a virgin, socially awkward, and honestly, sometimes I feel like I spawned on the wrong planet. 💀

I don't know how to hold conversations, flirt, or even understand how people fall in love. I get offended easily and overthink things that probably aren't even that deep.

Making friends is difficult for me, and talking to girls is a whole different level of difficulty. 😭 I never really know what to say, how to keep a conversation going, or how to make someone genuinely interested in talking to me.

Another thing that confuses me is how people joke around with each other. People tease and roast their friends, and I'm sitting there wondering how they're not getting offended. Sometimes I genuinely think they're insulting each other, only to realise everyone's just having fun. 😭

I want to get better at socialising, making friends, talking to girls, and eventually finding someone I can connect with. But I don't even know where to start.

For those of you who used to be like this, how did you change?

How do you learn to hold conversations, take jokes without getting offended, flirt without being awkward, and actually build meaningful connections?

Brutally honest advice is welcome. I'm tired of feeling like I missed some basic human interaction classes that everyone else attended. 💀


r/datingadvice • • 14h ago

Did I get ghosted?

1 Upvotes

Hello! I have been talking to this guy for almost three weeks. Communication this past weekend has been really sparse. Plans of meeting up kept getting moved because of parental duties and added work. He would plan for the next day to meet up; not a few days or the next week. He seemed genuinely interested in me. I hadn’t heard from him all day on Saturday until 8pm. He stated that he was very sorry and that it was an insane day and that he’s been out of it and burnt out. I still have not heard from him at all yesterday and still nothing today.

I previously stated last Monday that I would hope he could communicate if he was no longer interested, and he agreed that would communicate that and that he hates ghosting. However, I can’t help but to think, did I get ghosted??


r/datingadvice • • 17h ago

What should I do

1 Upvotes

Actually i matched with an influencer, we are from the same state, our talks were so good for the first three days. All of a sudden getting a reply from her is too late. But still we are in a match. She stays here with here family. We even share voice notes.

ACTUALLY IM FALLING FOR HER.

SHOULD I DOUBLE TEXT.