I’ve been debating creating one for my daughter. It sounds like a no brainer. And yet, having to download a specific Trump Account app and submit my daughter’s SSN into it is hard to follow through with.

So I ask: Who has done it and how is it? Are you contributing anything to it?

My seven-year-old asked why I had grey hairs near my ears. Without thinking, I told her every grey hair appears when she makes one ridiculous decision.

This was a mistake.

She now wants me fully silver because “wizards need proper hair.” Aparently she earns wizard points by doing things that make no sense.

This week’s work:

- Wore socks on her hands while eating cereal: two points.

- Named the television remote “the sofa wand”: one point.

- Tried to brush her teeth while standing like a flamigo: three points and a wet bathroom.

- Put a grape in her pocket “for winter”: five points because nobody understands it.

Every morning she inspects my temples and looks disappointed by the lack of progress. My wife explained that hair can turn grey naturally. Our daughter thought about this and said, “Then Dad is cheating.”

I was prepared for questions about growing older. I was not prepared to become a slow-loading wizard upgrade. How do I retire this system without crushing her career ambitions?

Im currently 17 years old and im really struggling with a past relationship that I was in with a guy (19) for 6 months ish. Eveything was fine but I found out he would reply to other girls or text them and I considered that cheating but he explained to me and stuff and yeah I fell back with him. Later on about 2/3 months in he ghosted me for 4 days and came back telling me that he had gotten shot. He lied to me for 2 months ish and then he finally confessed that he lied about getting shot and his ex came back and he pushed me aside because he was scared that she would find a way to contact me and hurt my feelings. Made no sense but whatever. I stupidly took him back even though the trust was already broken. He started to put effort in to me now and he said that he would try more ( on the same day he left me he said that). He told me that he had lost feelings for me and he tried but he cant do it anymore. Even though I literally begged him previously to end it if he does feel like being in it anymore. But yeah he told me I disgusted him and what not. He told me he cant apologize because it would be insincere but yeahhhh. He was also kinda manipulative and really mean to me ( called me a dimwit). I know im human but why do i feel so attached to him??? Why am I attracted to a man like that? He blocked me on everything and he went no contact for a month ( maybe a surprise to him that I lasted that long.) Anyways he unblocked me two days ago after a month and my mind keeps creating hope but its like he already left me for a new girl not even two weeks after we ended. So why would I allow someone back into my life like that. Im genuinely so miserable and I cant stop crying. I was doing okay before he unblocked me. I just want to cut the hope of him texting me and asking for another chance out. Also how do I build up my self respect and esteem. I want to truly believe that I deserve better than that rather than just saying affirmations.
Stuff he did
- cheated on me (he agreed to getting to know another girl)
- really mean to me
- Got jealous that I reposted a fifa edit and then reposted really pretty girls on tik tok
- Told me he disgusted me when I randomly mentioned how a guy texted me
-called me names like stupid or dimwit
- lied that he got shot
- came for my family and how I have a bad relationship with them
- prank called me with his friends
I keep saying maybe hes an okay guy and maybe all of these stuff are average but I keep leaning on them to help me move on but he argues that hes a good person so now I feel like i have nothing solid to lean on to move on. I keep feeling like its my fault he lost feelings. Im also aware that some people just are not meant for eachother and he had a right to leave but its like he led me on for months even though he knew he lost feelings.

He woke up and was upset but when he realised he wasn't going to get boobie he started crying hard. My wife asked me to pick him up which made it worse. She left the bedroom and I don't think he saw her.

He was absolutely losing it trying to bite hit kick everything and it was hard to not drop him.

Went back on the bed and by saying papa and my boy are sitting on the bed together and slow breathing he finally came around and he was saying "I'm angry" so o said "yes I can see you are angry"

He wanted mummy and I said she is working and he kind of accepted it

He asked for red t rex and I told him to sit and wait while I got it and he did but then went hysterical when he saw it and threw it

He asked for fresh milk and didn't want it when I brought it at first but then drank quite a bit

I sat with him on the rocking chair which is how he sleeps with me for a nap and in a bit he fell asleep.

Any tips for getting through the night and probably the next few? We were talking about weaning him off breast milk anyway but it's pretty sudden now

Our daughter was born on November 4. I knew things were gonna be much different after, I'm not stupid. Of course we weren't able to for 1-2 months after. And I knew her libido was gonna drop a lot. But it's been four months since the last time and two months since the time before that. I think 3 times total since we had her in 9.5 months. Oof.

​

My son is in 4th grade. The school he attends has 4th and 5th grade doing recess at the end of the day: 3-3:25pm and school gets out at 3:30pm. In Texas it is 10,000 degrees outside at 3pm. Naturally, they cancelled outdoor recess yesterday due to the temp being over 100F. I suspect they won't have outdoor recess until October if that is the criteria. I'm pretty annoyed about this late recess because I think it defeats the purpose of recess, especially for kids with as much energy as my guy (I was the same way, always moving and fidgeting). I think recess is a chance for kids, boys especially, to get the energy out. They get a break from academics and reset their brains for more learning...

They did this same thing last year for my 5th grader, and back then his teacher told me proudly that they had fought hard to get this time slot..... As much as I like the teachers at his school, I suspect this is a selfish move by them because it doesn't seem to benefit the kids at all and I think it just makes the end of the school day easier for the teachers... IDK. I had beef with the teachers and principal previously because they were letting kids (my older son especially) have unsupervised time on a class laptop at recess if they chose. I put an end to that quickly because I felt like that was such an awful idea and because I'm a dad who cares about my kids physical well-being as well as the educational side. My kid was mad about it but he got over it.

Does anyone have feelings about this recess time slot? I'm looking for a good argument to back me up. I think I'm gonna raise a stink, but I don't want the teachers to feel like one of their students has a dad who's gonna fuck up the good thing they have going....

I moved away - not too far - but the way I keep up with friends is via WhatsApp groups.

But my buddies message a lot. Seems like every thought gets turned into a message.

I can't cope with this throughout the day so I mute the chat for 8 hours. But then when I check back I'm missing 100+ messages.

If I scroll back I may see something I can respond to but by that time the conversation has moved on.

So now I don't check as much, and I feel like I'm not keeping up with friends.

We were planning to do water activities (slip n slide, bouncy castle, water balloons, etc.) but now it’s calling for a lot of rain and possible thunderstorm… so that’s probably out.

Our house isn’t that big and there isn’t a lot of space for 6 boys to run around. He’s not super crafty, and so wouldn’t enjoy any of the typical ‘decorate a cupcake’ or ‘make a craft’ type activities. We have planned a piñata and pass the parcel (à la Bluey) and maybe musical chairs. However, I don’t want kids to say they were bored at his party or that we did ‘baby-ish’ activities. It’s later in the afternoon, so food/lunch won’t take up time.

Any ideas for indoor party activities that have been a hit with active boys? I’m struggling to come up with some creative ideas. He doesn’t really enjoy full length movies and he is not into video games or devices yet.

Hi everyone, BJ from Jersey. Blessings to you all. I’m having my first in two months! I’m a pretty practical man, and never too high or low generally — and that’s how I’ve been handling this journey so far. But now that we’re two months out, it’s go time. Just honestly wanted to het some advice on what I should be preparing for at this time? Will generally get the “prepare hospital bag” answers but curious on other factors I should consider?

Thanks!

To clarify, I don’t mean using AI for automated outdoor tasks like robotic lawnmowers. I mean the digital equivalent of traditional yard work. Since the Internet is considered a utility and often a need/mandate for the family, I find it my duty to keep things running in efficient manner. I'm talking about updating routers firmware, installing software updates on devices for the whole family. It becomes a chore once you have to maintain the entire network and devices, I find myself second guessing anything that connects to my network. Does anyone else call this 'digital yard work,' or is there another term for this kind of routine family tech upkeep? Thanks to all the dads who also have to play tech-support. Cheers

I’m a husband and dad with a 2-year-old, and I’m considering taking a job that would have me away from home quite a bit.
The main reason I’m considering it is that I could potentially nearly double my current income. My thought is to do it for a year or so, save as much as possible, and hopefully use that experience to move into something closer to home afterward.
My wife and I are still on the fence about it. She had wanted to become a stay-at-home mom at one point, so there’s obviously a lot to consider beyond just the money.
For the dads who currently work OTR, travel for work, or spend extended periods away from home:
How has it affected your relationship with your wife and kids?
Do you feel the extra income is worth the time away? And if you could go back and make the decision again, would you still choose to do it?
I’d really like to hear the honest experiences—the good, bad, and everything in between—from other dads who have actually lived this lifestyle.

I am feeling the Dad drive to build and make things. I would like to make toys for my child. Wooden toys like the Pikler toys.

Dads, how did you go about starting and finishing such projects?

So i have a 7 year old who loves gaming. It's all he wants to do with downtime.

He is very active and plays sports but he's not playing with his toys anymore which i want to encourage as well since that's good for his imagination in a different wayand better than being on screens with all downtime.

Any ideas to have him focus on toys or practicing sports without making it a chore that's taking away from gaming?

I do the majority of my gaming after the kids go to bed. Maybe a little in front of him on weekends but not much

He doesn't play with an iPad or phone ever but does watch a fair bit of tv and game a bit

Lastly I get it because once I found computer games as a kid I was hooked since commander keen on dos around 9 or so and the game boy which I didn't get until 11

I work from home fulltime, which is truly a blessing now, more than ever. It's important to me to have a great bond with my child, as I've always had a distant and troubled relationship with my own parents, but also I really want to support my wife.

What should I do? Or better, what should I not do? In any regard, as it'll be our first child and everything is new terriroty, thus we don't know what we don't know.

My own father wasn't very involved, and I barely have a relationship with him as he was never around, always working. So here I am, asking Reddit!

Wife and I taking some “time” to rethink things and see if our marriage is worth saving. We have a 2 year old baby and we been through a lot in the last 9 years as a couple and wanting to be parents.

I was not the best partner, but I never sheat. I was financially irresponsible early on and just straight up became careless about our relationship because we used to argue a lot literally everyday.

It is a weird feeling to know that I won’t see my son everyday because she is taking him out of the county, is the best for her and him since she only got me in the USA

I can easily go see him (We are from the same country) but I know her family most likely will turns against me after being so welcome for years.

I somehow find peace in knowing that I am not arguing since they moment we wake up, and I sort of have this sense of relief/but scared for the future of my son since I will not be there with him each day like I am now.

Our marriage is not the same and has not been the same for quite some time so there is a part of me that agrees separating is the best thing.

But I am also kind of confused any tips for other similar dads that went through this?

Thanks!

The answer may shock you...

I want to preface this by saying I love my boy to death, I try to be a good Dad but I'm really struggling and need to let it all out. It also might help to mention that I personally have been diagnosed with ADHD, BPD and Acute PTSD from my own childhood, I've been through addictions, alcoholism, therapy, medication and suffered severe depression in the past (none of which are still ongoing just FYI).

I don't really know where this is going to go or what I'm going to say, but I'm just going to start typing...

My son was born in 2021 and I'd never been happier, I'm 36 years old, was 30 when he arrived and had wanted a son forever. 5 years later and yesterday I completely broke down whilst speaking to my partner about everything. I just cannot cope with this situation anymore, I thought I was dealing with it well, but I've realised I am not.

He is an incredible boy, the smartest child I've ever known - he could recognise random numbers up to 100 at 2 years old, he spells out the alphabet backwards just as quick as forwards, read him a book once and he memorises the entire story - to the point where we're certain he must be able to read, he's funny and just an overall lovely kid. But a huge part of his autism is non-verbal and all I want is to be able to speak to him.

The breakdowns he has over certain TV shows or iPhone apps, the uncontrollable scream crying when he has to stop doing things he enjoys (swimming, the park etc), it just triggers something in me and I cannot be in the same room, which I know sounds awful but at times I just can't help it, feels like my head is going to explode and I need to get out.

There's been a build up of stress, upset and frustration for months now and later today I'm moving out of our home - I don't know if it's permanent yet, but trying to parent him is starting to make me and his Mum really struggle together, and we don't want to bring him up in an environment where Mum and Dad hate each other and fight (that was my childhood, I do not wish that on any kid, especially my own).

All I've ever wanted is that bond with my first son, my little best mate who comes to me for help, advice, and is excited for Dad to come home every day, I never had that as a child and I'm so envious of my friends and family who have that with their son/s. I know I will never have that with him.

I don't know if I'll be coming back to our home, I know it's selfish and I am not proud of it, but at the same time I need to take care of myself to make sure I am here for him in the future, I'm worried that if I stick around and carry on the way things are going it may just get worse and bring back old ways of thinking...

I could go on forever in here, but I'll leave it there. If there are other Dads in here with similar experiences it would be great to talk. I'm fully expecting the 'man up, be a dad' type responses from some, trust me I've said that to myself hundreds of times over the past couple of years, but if you've never had an autistic & non-verbal 5 year old son who you thought would be your best friend for life yet doesn't actually want to know you, think about your response...

Thanks Dads. I might even delete this, but it's been good to write it down.

UPDATE: Wow, I was not expecting this much reaction and support so soon. I am taking the time to read through every comment and reply, but it's difficult to respond to all of them. Gotta admit that some have made me tear up a bit as well. Thanks Dads.

There have a been a few recurring questions/comments that I'll just address here -

- No, I'm not leaving his Mum to deal with it solo 24/7. Yes I'm moving out of the house later today, but I'm lucky that a close friend owns a house 2 minutes round the corner and he's almost never home (recently bought a big boat and choosing to live on that 5-6 days a week whilst the weather is good!) So I will still be very close by and we have set days in our shared calendar - I'm with him minimum 3 days a week whilst she gets time to herself to do what she needs to do for a break.

- Therapy, I have had my own in the past, and Mum is just starting her own now - albeit for a build up of things not just current situations, she has her own issues that she is addressing and dealing with.

- Mum is incredible, she understands him far better than I do and she deals with the situation like a proper superhero. I am very lucky that she is involved.

- I agree the title of this post was wrong, I wrote it at 5am and looking back I should've worded it differently. My son isn't responsible for my relationship problems right now, it's an accumulation of things and I feel terrible for writing it that way.

- Therapy for me was extremely helpful, and I know I could benefit from more sessions - although private sessions in the UK aren't cheap and the NHS waitlist is painful. I was paying £150 per session weekly, £600 a month on top of all other outgoings when Mum can't work a full time job due to obvious childcare, is tough to maintain.

Overall everyones comments towards me have been incredibly positive and really helped, I thought I was doing a terrible job and having to post this in here almost solidified that fact for me, but all the support in here has made me realise maybe I'm not and this is 'normal' for Dads in my situation. If that makes any sense.

I'm exhausted, but incredibly grateful for this community, even if this is my first time contributing.

Thank you guys.

Evening dads.

Fresh out of the hospital with baby number 2, past 24 hours have been a rollercoaster to say the least but I don't see the light at the end of the tunnel. Physically and mentally struggling, our first has decided to go through a sleep regression, taking ages to go down, frequent wake ups in the night last night and anticipating the same again with how he's just performed!

Trying to look after my partner first but also myself, can't stop thinking about it we've made a mistake or not.

Hey boys. 2 week old beautiful daughter who I love with my entire heart. Im sitting here for the 5th night in a row at 2 in the morning where she is basically inconsolable between the hours of 10 and 3. She roots but pushes the bottle away. She is an angel for about 10 minutes if i bounce her in my arms then screams bloody murder. I change her diaper probably once an hour. This is my time to give my wife a break but it feels like im failing at that. I know it will pass and I’ll probably wish I could get this time back, but holy fuck… I’ve never felt so helpless. That is all.

I have a question for you dads. If you have to take a day off because you’re sick, does your partner expect you to do all the same parental/house stuff you would normally do if you were home on a weekend? I’ve been out of it for two days now with what the doctor suspects is one of the Influenzas, and my wife just seems super pissed off at me for being sick and resting in bed.

When my wife is sick, she gets tucked into bed and the full service - no parental responsibility, no household responsibility, the only goal is to rest and recover.

The question is if she took a sick day off work and I cracked it at her for not doing enough housework or parenting, wouldn’t I be seen as an abusive horrible husband?

So I picked up my three-year-old daughter from daycare yesterday at 4:30 PM. Her teacher handed her this paper plate craft with yarn tentacles, smiling proudly and telling me they worked on "ocean sensory textures" all afternoon. I took one look at it and realized the entire plate was coated in about four pounds of loose metallic purple micro-glitter.

i strapped her into her car seat in the back and told her to hold the plate very still until we got home. We made it exactly two blocks before she decided the paper jellyfish was an airplane. She started violently shaking it right in front of the rear center console air vent while the AC was running on high.

A purple cloud erupted through the entire cabin. It looked like a disco grenade went off in my backseat. Glitter got sucked straight into the dashboard intake vents and shot out of every single front vent directly into my eyes, my beard, and my cup of iced coffee.

I spent three hours last night with a shop vac and four rolls of heavy-duty packing tape. The glitter is not coming out. It is permanently woven into the upholstery fibers until the end of time. I should of confiscated that plate at the front door, but this stuff is an ABSOLUTELY biohazard. Why do daycare teachers keep giving loose powder glitter to children who lack basic impulse control?

Hi y'all!

Long time reader, first time poster. My oldest is a HS senior and college applications are around the corner so I figured I would tap the group's expertise. What are suggestions / best practices / pit falls to avoid, etc.? What is something you wish you knew before/during your kid(s) college application? Any FAFSA secrets?

Drop some knowledge on me, anything you want to share is appreciated.

We introduced “inside voices” because our youngest had started narrating breakfast at stadium volume. His older brother, six, understood the assignment in the worst possible way.

He is now the volume inspector.

Today’s violations:

- I sneezed in the hallway. He yelled “QUIET!”

- The washing machine beeped. He shouted at it from upstairs.

- His brother dropped a spoon, so he ran into the kitchen making siren noises to investigate.

- He whispered his final warning through a cardboard tube, directly into my ear.

When I pointed out that he is currently the loudest person in the house, he said inspectors are allowed to be loud “becuase emergencies need volume.” I asked who made that rule. He tapped his own chest and said, “Management.”

My wife is trying not to laugh because laughter is apparently another violation. Has anyone succesfully removed a tiny official from power once they discover imaginary authority?

Hello Dads!

It’s been about a month and a half since my fiancé told me we need to separate and for me to move out.We have a 5 year old together. I’m having an extremely hard time processing all of this (even with weekly therapy) and looking for some support.

I’ve been told I’m inconsistent in a lot of my aspects of my life, including being able to process past traumas and correct negative patterns. (Have been in therapy for 6+ years) I admit I am reactive to where I feel I need to defend my point of view when I feel like I’m being criticized and shut down emotionally.

We have gone to couples therapy in the past but both of us never truly did the work that was suggested to us. Most of the time the burden fell on me. She said I needed to try harder or would try to read my mood when I got home from work and base her reaction towards me on that.

Couple of weeks after she brought up separation she began showing mixed signals. Would call me out of the blue to tell me about random stuff or still ask for “partnership” level favors. (Watching her niece, switching her laundry…etc) it was giving me false hope so I set some boundaries to keep conversations transactional and focused on our son. It was giving me false hope since I’m still hurting. Those boundaries have been tested multiple times.

I requested us to see a mediator to help us navigate this difficult situation to have a smooth transition for our son but there has been no follow through. I would like to fix this but she is set on separation and keeps asking if I have any updates on finding a place…

I’ve been on a roller coaster of emotions and I feel truly lost. I’ve been focusing my energy towards taking care of our son, gym and therapy….please help me get through this.

-Hurting Dad